Cornered
Chapter eleven
Jake
The next day Seth comes back to the hotel, and I decide it’s now or never to get my memory back. We’re back in Alex’s room, and he sits on the couch next to me for support, holding onto my hand. Brandon is helping Seth set everything back up.
I don’t want to do this. I don’t want to see the worst moments of my life playing out before my eyes like a movie.
But I have to do this. I need to know what happened to me.
Once everything is set up, Seth sits in front of me and starts his incantation.
All of a sudden the scene before me changes.
I’m in a room, but it’s not Seth in front of me.
It’s like watching a VHS tape that’s been played a few too many times.
The picture is fuzzy and I try to focus on what I’m seeing.
I’m in my room with Andrei, who has all my attention at the moment.
I've tried my best to stay away from my father's bullshit, away from him, but they always seem to draw me back into their orbit.
Trying to convey a confidence I don’t feel, I say, “I'm not going back home, I already told him that.
I'm sorry you wasted your time coming out here, but I just want to be left alone. I want no part of any of this. Your business is with him, not me.” My hands are shaking but I stand my ground, doing my best to not drop my gaze to the floor.
“That’s not an option,” he replies. “My business is with him, yes, and now is with you as well. Don’t tell me I’ve wasted my time with you.
” His Russian accent is thick, but it’s not the accent or the words he’s saying that makes my skin crawl.
It’s the way he says them. The way he looks at me as he says them.
One meaty, tattooed fist closes in frustration and I swallow thickly.
The damage that fist could do to me makes me want to take a step back, but I can’t show him my fear.
He leers at me as he closes the distance between us, body pressing against mine.
I do take a step back then, but the back of my knees hit the bed.
Oh god. He reaches a hand out and caresses my face gently, so at odds with the anger that’s still radiating off of him.
“Listen to me carefully,” he says. “You will do as I say, when I say. Your father gave you to my daughter, which means you belong to me. You don’t have to like my daughter, but you will keep up pretenses. I’ll be sure to keep you entertained. Do we have an understanding?”
All I can do is shake my head. My throat is closing and I don’t know if I can even speak, but I try to croak out a “no.” He sighs deeply and grabs a fistful of my hair, yanking my head back, hard, and I cry out in pain.
I reach up and cover his hand with my own, trying to get him to ease up.
He’s a few inches taller than me, so I have to look up to meet his gaze. It’s a mistake.
“No? Do I need to put you in your place again?” His face is so close I can feel his breath against my cheek.
“Please,” I whimper, fear getting the better of me.
He shakes me roughly and reaches for his belt buckle with his free hand.
He struggles with one of the loops and I use his momentary distraction to yank my hair free from his grip and make a blind run for the door.
He grabs me from behind before I can get far and slaps a hand over my mouth.
“That was stupid,” Andrei says, and that tone promises nothing good. Tears form in my eyes, but I refuse to let them fall in front of him. He's going to hurt me, and I can’t stop him. No one is coming to help me.
“Please don’t,” I say when he removes his hand from my mouth, knowing I’m wasting my breath.
“You Covington’s are cunts, all of you. More trouble than you're worth. I suppose I still have other uses for you, pet.”
“No, no, no, please don’t, please–” I’m begging at this point, but I don’t care.
Before I can do anything, he pushes me roughly onto the bed.
He stands there for a minute just looking at me and I can’t tear my eyes away from him, heart beating out of my chest. I scoot up the bed in an attempt to get away from him, but he climbs over me and straddles my hips, flipping me onto my stomach with terrifying ease.
I’m not a small guy but I stand no chance against his bulk.
When I feel his hands on me, I want to die.
I guess I’ll get that wish soon. I’d rather be dead than his plaything anyway.
“When I’m done with you, you’ll never think about disobeying me again,” he says as he reaches beneath me and pops open the button on my jeans. I try to call out for help, but he wraps a large hand around my throat and squeezes, silencing me and cutting off my ability to breathe.
I can’t watch anymore. I know what happens next. “Get me out,” I cry out to no one, anyone that can hear me.
Get me out, get me out, get me out. I don’t want this.
I know that this is just a memory, that it’s not really happening to me right now, but it still feels so real.
I can feel his breath on the back of my neck, the weight of him crushing me into the mattress.
His hand tangled in my hair, holding me down.
The feeling of helplessness, knowing that nothing I say or do can stop this. That it never could.
Before I know it, I’m yanked out of the memory by Seth.
I take a deep breath and open my eyes, vision blurred by tears.
I realize that at some point I must have fallen off of the couch, as I’m currently sprawled out on the floor.
I sit up and lean my back against it. Brandon is standing still against the wall, looking stricken.
Seth kneels beside me and wraps a hand around the back of my neck, grounding me back into reality.
“It was just a memory,” he says. “It can’t hurt you. You’re safe here.”
My chest heaves in relief, and all of the adrenaline rushes out of me, leaving me weak and shaky.
Alex sits quietly next to me, a devastated expression on my face.
He doesn’t know exactly what I saw, but he knows it’s bad.
I hate being vulnerable in front of him, but at this moment I want nothing more in this world than to hold onto him.
“It felt so real,” I whisper. My throat feels raw, like I’ve been screaming. Nothing else hurts though, so I guess it can’t have been real.
He seems to understand what I need without me having to say a word, because he crawls onto my lap and throws his arms around my neck, hugging me tightly. I hold onto him like a lifeline and fall apart as he whispers in my ear.
“Everything will be okay,” he says with such conviction that I almost believe him. But nothing will ever be okay again. It’s one thing to know how weak and pathetic I am, but to see evidence of it playing out before me? He rocks me and I lose all sense of time.
Eventually, there are no more tears to cry.
I sit slumped against the wall, feeling listless.
Alex is still holding me close, his weight the only thing keeping me tethered to reality right now.
He pulls back a little to look at my face, bringing a hand up to cup my cheek.
I flinch, automatically feeling like a fool.
I know he won’t hurt me. He would never.
But right now, my brain doesn’t seem to understand that.
A tear slips down his cheek. “Tell me what happened,” he whispers.
So, I tell him. If I was in a better headspace I’d be too embarrassed, too ashamed to blurt out the details of what he put me through, but I just need it out.
I need someone to know, to care. Alex sits back on my legs silently as I tell him what Andrei did to me.
How I died. It was a horrible accident, Andrei just got carried away during—Don’t say it.
Don’t think about it. It takes a while to get it all out, as the words keep getting stuck in my throat.
I don’t want him to look at me like I’m damaged. Broken. Disgusting.
But of course, he doesn’t look at me like that. He looks at me with so much love that I feel like I could break down all over again. I don’t deserve that look.
“I’m so sorry that happened to you Jake. You didn’t deserve that. Any of it.” He sniffles and I feel like I should comfort him in return, but right now I have nothing to give.
“What do I do now?” I ask, voice barely a whisper.
“Well, that’s easy. We’re going to find a way to kill Andrei. Violently. And then…” he pauses for dramatic effect, the little shit. He leans close to my ear and purrs, “We are going to kill your parents.”
I sigh a breath of relief. I don’t feel strong enough to handle any of this, but knowing I have this crazy, tiny guy in my corner gives me hope. He has enough strength for both of us.