CHAPTER TWENTY
IRIS
When William’s gaze met mine, my heart stopped.
He stood among the crowd, still and silent, his armor catching the sunlight. But it wasn’t the light that made my stomach twist. It was his eyes.
They weren’t soft like before. They were hard, sharp with disbelief and anger. His jaw was set tight, the muscle shifting beneath his skin. I wanted to look away, but I couldn’t.
No. No, this wasn’t how he was supposed to find out.
Around us, servants began filling the tables with food, their movements quick and careful. Laughter echoed from the lords gathered near the dais. My father smiled as though he had won some great battle. The scent of roasted meat and honey filled the air, heavy and suffocating.
But for me, this was no celebration.
I could barely breathe. My palms were slick against the silk of my gown. I kept my eyes on my father, silently begging him to finish his speech, to end this before I fell apart.
“Together,” he said, raising his goblet high, “our kingdoms will stand stronger than ever.”
The crowd cheered, the sound crashing around me. I could feel it in my bones. Still, I looked for William. He hadn’t moved. His eyes stayed locked on me, and his jaw clenched harder, his teeth grinding as if he were holding back words meant only for me.
My throat tightened. I wanted to run to him, to explain, to tell him everything. But I couldn’t. Not until my father finished his speech.
So I stood there, frozen beneath his stare, praying for the moment to end before the truth between us shattered completely.
I turned my head for only a second, just to catch my breath, but when I looked back, he was gone.
My heart stumbled. The place where he had been standing was empty, swallowed by the crowd.
I looked toward my father, silently begging him to stop speaking. Please, just finish. My hands shook at my sides. At last, he lowered his goblet, his tone calm and commanding. “Eat,” he said. “Celebrate this future union.”
The crowd cheered again, but I barely heard them. I lifted my skirts and stepped down from the dais, my eyes darting across the sea of faces. I searched for him, through nobles, soldiers, servants, but he was nowhere.
Not near the tables.
Not among the guards.
Not even at the edge of the yard.
My chest felt tight. He couldn’t have just disappeared.
I moved faster, weaving through the people until I reached the
open gates. Maybe he had gone outside. Maybe he was just trying to breathe like I was.
I broke into a run. The noise of the feast faded behind me, replaced by the sound of my pulse pounding in my ears. The cold air stung my skin as I turned the corner and the hem of my gown caught the stone.
Then a hand caught my bare shoulder.
“Elara.”
I stopped. Slowly, I turned.
He stood in the archway, half in shadow, half bright from the torchlight. The wind lifted a strand of his dark hair, but he didn’t move. His jaw was tight. His eyes, once warm, were colder than I had ever seen them.
“Or should I say,” he said quietly, his voice low and controlled, “Your Highness?”
The words hit hard. For a moment, I couldn’t breathe. I looked up at him, my chest tight. He stood close enough that I could see his veins tensing. The space shrinked between us as he t
“William,” I whispered.
He didn’t move. “Your Highness,” he repeated, the title sharper this time.
The title made something twist inside me. I swallowed hard. “I know this is shocking.”
He gave a short, humorless laugh. “Shocking?” His tone was quiet, but every word cut. “That’s one way to put it. I spent weeks thinking you were someone else entirely. A healer. Someone I could trust. Someone who didn’t lie every time she opened her mouth.”
My throat burned. “Please,” I said softly. “I didn’t mean for you to find out this way.”
He shook his head, eyes fixed on me. The torchlight caught the line of his jaw, the tension in his neck. “Then how was I supposed to find out?” he asked. “When you disappeared for good? After you married that Valebran prince?”
“I wanted to tell you,” I said, my voice trembling. “I tried to tell you today, before Raven interrupted. You wouldn’t understand.”
His brow furrowed, disbelief flashing in his eyes. “Wouldn’t
understand?” His tone dropped lower, quiet but sharp enough to sting. “Right. So while I was risking my position just to see you, you were hiding a secret that could have me executed.”
Tears blurred my vision. “I never meant to lie to you.”
He didn’t answer. The silence between us felt heavier than his anger.
“I was afraid,” I said.. “The first time, when we met at your house, I lied because I thought you might tell my father. You don’t know what he’s capable of when he’s angry. I would’ve been locked away for weeks, maybe worse.”
He looked at me, his jaw tightening, but I pressed on.
“And later, when we started to talk more, when I started to care about you, I was scared again, because I knew that once you found out who I was, everything would change. You’re a knight, William. You serve my father. I thought if you knew the truth, you’d look at me the same way he does.”
His eyes flickered, the hardness in them shifting for a moment, but not enough to soften it.
“I didn’t want to be a princess with you,” I said quietly. “I just wanted to be me.”
The air between us went still. The torches by the wall hissed softly, filling the silence. He looked at me for a long time, and for a moment, I thought I saw something break in his expression. Not anger this time, but hurt.
Then his voice came again, low and sharp. “You should go back inside, Your Highness.”
The title cut deeper than any blade.
“William,” I whispered, reaching out before I could stop myself.
But he was already turning away. His boots struck the stone with each step, the sound echoing down the corridor until it faded into silence.
I stood there, frozen, staring at the place where he had been. Then the tears came again, falling one by one, each one sharper than the last.