Chapter 16 #2
“Baby Bear would like that very much—as would I.” Grasping a leading string, she set the dog on the carpet and then glanced toward her mother. With her mother’s apparent approval, she then took Garrett’s offered arm, and he led her out an open terrace door.
He appreciated the boundaries set by her family. She deserved to be safeguarded by her father and mother, her brothers. And she ought to be protected once married.
A warm breeze stirred the air. Garrett inhaled deeply. The fresh unspoiled air was one of the greatest arguments for living in the country. He could also smell a hint of Natalie’s subtle perfume. It was difficult to identify the scents it encompassed; it just seemed uniquely her.
She held the leading string with one hand and his arm with the other. Garrett took the string from her. This allowed her to grasp his arm with both hands and lean into him. When Baby Bear began sniffing about suspiciously, Natalie spoke.
“He is shy. He likes to do his business in private.” She gestured to a copse of trees off to the side of the manor. This would lead them farther away from the other guests. These evening walks were becoming a dangerous habit.
Garrett allowed the pup to steer them both.
“He is house-trained already?”
“We’re working on it.” Natalie spoke proudly. “Do you have a dog?”
He had. As a boy, he’d become attached to an unfortunate dog who’d had the audacity to roam onto his father’s estate uninvited.
Upon discovering the animal, his father had drowned it.
“A long time ago,” Garrett answered. “My father did not approve of his bloodline and killed it.” He didn’t mean to be so blunt. Saying the words revived unwanted memories.
Natalie walked, unspeaking, and stopped once they’d reached the trees. Baby Bear was interested in marking several of them one by one. He raised one tiny leg and let out a squirt.
“What did you name him?”
“My dog?” he asked, revisiting that train of thought.
“Yes, your pet.”
Garrett looked off into the distance, across the lawn and at the lake. He wasn’t seeing any of it, though. Instead a memory intruded of a large brown and black mutt. That dog had followed him everywhere! He’d been on the receiving end of unfettered adoration from…“Ben.”
“You named your dog Ben?” she asked with a laugh in her voice.
“Well, at least it was a name!” Garrett looped the leading string around a sturdy branch and then, giving in to impulse, wrapped his arms around her affectionately.
“Your poor pet is bound to go through life labelled as the wrong species! And what of when he becomes a wise old dog? He shall forever suffer the indignity of being called Baby!” Garrett took a few steps forward, forcing her to walk backward until she stood pressed against the trunk of a large oak.
Releasing her, he raised both his hands and placed them on the bark above her shoulders.
Laughing, she locked her gaze with his. “Well, I thought he was a bear when I first saw him.” She pouted prettily. “And he will always be my baby.”
Said baby was managing to tangle himself in a myriad of smaller branches.
Garrett leaned forward and placed an open-mouthed kiss on her shoulder.
And, as if the most natural thing in the world, Natalie tilted her head to the side.
Much better, now he could explore the skin behind her ear.
The familiarity of touching her so ought to bother him.
Being with her was too easy—it felt artless and instinctive.
As he swirled his tongue along her neck, she moaned softly.
Somehow, he’d veered away from his plan to obtain information from her. He wished to ask her a few questions, questions that had nothing to do with the sweet softness of her skin beneath his lips. Such a delightful distraction.
He nuzzled her and stepped closer, their bodies meeting, shoulders to thighs. Without moving his hands from the tree, he had her exactly where he wanted. He heard the hitch in her breath and felt the quickening of her heartbeat in the pulse beneath his mouth.
Fragile arms wrapped around his waist. Hesitant at first, they tightened as she grew bolder. Garrett dragged kisses along her jaw, pausing when he reached the tender skin at the corner of her mouth. These inclinations were likely to lead them both straight to the altar.
“Garrett,” she breathed. “Garrett, just kiss me already!”
He’d rethink this problem later.
Dropping his arms, he pulled her against him and gave his lips free rein. He didn’t need to tease open the seam of her mouth. Her lips were already parted.
And her hands explored him.
He could not suppress a groan when she reached inside his waistcoat and beneath his shoulder blades.
A part of him wondered that he had not felt this way with any other woman.
This was lust, yes, hot, blazing lust, but there was something else—protectiveness, tenderness, a fierce desire to make love to her and then hold her till she fell asleep.
Garrett broke the kiss and pressed her head into his chest. He could not let this proceed in its natural direction without knowing more.
If he were to offer for her, would she have him? She’d not sounded eager to become betrothed again when they’d spoken of it earlier. Likely he was fooling himself, but he needed to know: could she be happy as his countess?
Breathing deeply, he spoke. “Tell me about your betrothal to the Duke of Cortland.”
It took a few seconds for her to comprehend what he said.
She pulled back and looked at him quizzically.
Then, nodding thoughtfully, seeming to make a decision, she pushed herself out of his arms and stepped over to retrieve Baby Bear’s leading string.
“I liked Cortland. He was, he is, an honorable gentleman.” Untangling the string, she freed the dog and allowed him to pull them farther into the trees.
“He is a good friend to my father, was, anyway. He is pleasant.” She took a few steps.
“He is good-looking. He courted me formally. Always, always we had a chaperone present. The only time we were alone was during the three minutes required to ask for my hand.”
“Three minutes?” Garrett asked with raised eyebrows.
“One minute for him to ask. One minute for me to accept. And one minute for him to seal our agreement with a kiss.”
They took several steps without talking. And then Garrett delved deeper.
“What about the betrothal caused you distress?”
“I felt no distress at all in the beginning,” Natalie responded.
“The wedding was set for a year off, and I assumed I would come to have more romantic feelings for him as the engagement progressed. I hoped so anyway, because—well, the begetting of children and all that.” She looked over at him from under her lashes.
“But you did not.”
“No.” Natalie halted for Baby Bear, who’d stopped to examine something curious to only him. “I came to know him better. He was always kind. He was always a perfect gentleman.” And then she smiled mischievously. “Unlike other gentlemen I know.”
Garrett persisted. “You did not wish for him to be such a gentleman?”
“That is a good question.” She tilted her head back and gazed up at the trees.
“With the wedding just a month away, a group of us went on a picnic to my dower property, London Manor. Our party consisted of my brother Joseph and his now wife, Glenda. Also her Aunt Lilly, Lord Danbury, His Grace, and myself.”
Lilly, the name sounded familiar. “The aunt? She is the lady Cortland married, is she not?”
“She is. But please, please do not be sorry for me.” Natalie grasped a twig and broke it off.
“Lilly is my friend. She is in love with Cortland, and he is in love with her. I became certain of it that day. In fact, I sent them off alone in hopes they might work things out. At that point, I was already desperate for Cortland to break things off.”
Cortland would never break the engagement. The little Garrett knew of the duke was enough for him to know of his impeccable honor.
Garrett did not speak. He assumed she had more to tell.
“Glenda and Joseph went into the manor, and Lilly and Cortland disappeared into the woods. That left Hugh and me alone.”
Oh, hell. Not Danbury!
Garrett knew the viscount was a harmless rake, but he did not like to imagine him with Natalie. Danbury was Cortland’s best friend but not considered nearly as honorable as the duke. In fact, he’d frequented a few of the establishments where Garrett had found pleasure.
“What happened?” Garrett prodded her.
Perhaps he did not wish to hear this. The thought of Natalie with Danbury, especially after this evening’s earlier confrontation, was enough to make him wish he’d gone ahead and laid Danbury out with his fists after all.
“Unlike my fiancé, Danbury lacked any reluctance to…step out of line with me. Not that he would have done so had he thought Cortland held me in any true affection.” She gave Garrett a stern look. “Danbury can be a rake, but he does follow a moral code of sorts.”
“Of course,” Garrett replied, clenching his fists for the second time that night. Was this jealousy? Garrett dismissed it and returned his attention to Natalie’s words.
“It was a lazy afternoon. We’d consumed a good amount of wine and were lying on the blanket in the sunshine.” Garrett did not like the scenario she created in his mind. He did not like the mental image of another man taking liberties with Natalie.
“And then he kissed me, oh, so very different from when Cortland kissed me. Michael had always seemed to hold himself apart. He is so very controlled. But Danbury, his kiss was savage…carnal even.”
Garrett wanted to growl. Instead he asked, “Was it the same as it is—” He stopped walking and kicked at some loose stones on the ground. “—between you and me?”
He looked over just in time to see a warm blush crawl into her cheeks. “Oh, no! I mean, it was nice…but not…”—she seemed to be searching for her words— “not at all the same.” Her words ended in a near whisper.
“Do you have feelings for Danbury?”
She’d surprised him. He had thought his kiss had been her first.
“Gratitude.” She laughed. “For showing me so clearly what my betrothal lacked. For showing me the difference between tolerance and passion.” And then she met his eyes solemnly and shook her head. “Nothing more.”
Danbury could live, then.
God, he was besotted.
He needed to get back to his original line of questioning. “And so, after the picnic, you were even more reluctant to go through with the marriage?”
“Yes.” Natalie tugged at Baby Bear’s string, pulling him back onto the path. “The thought terrified me.”
“What were you afraid of?” There must have been other things that had put her off the marriage so carefully arranged by her parents. “Were you not looking forward to gaining such a lofty title?”
“I looked forward to being a wife. I looked forward to being a mother. I did not look forward to being a duchess.” She took a few steps and then turned to look at him.
“Do you know that I did not even know which of his properties we would have made into our home? I was expected to begin my marriage in a place where I would be a complete stranger to everyone around me. As a duchess, I would never know if people were friendly to me or to my position.” She warmed to her topic.
“I was to become involved in large charities and fundraising. That is what duchesses do, you know.”
“And this was not something you wanted?”
“I like visiting tenants with my mother.” Natalie scooped Baby Bear into her arms. “I like that she can make a difference in their lives and that they have come to love her for this. It is not that any title matters to me, it is just that I wish to matter, me, as a person, not just as an asset in a business arrangement.” She pulled a face.
“I feel selfish when I say it out loud.”
Garrett shook his head slowly. “You should not.”
The crack of a branch nearby alerted him that their solitude was about to be interrupted. As the sounds drew nearer, the commotion revealed itself to be unpleasant, indeed.
Men’s voices rose in slurred, foul, drunken language. Realizing how far from the manor they’d drifted, Garrett took Natalie’s arm with the intention of moving her and the dog away from the approaching sounds. He had an uncomfortable suspicion as to whom the voices belonged.
The dog began barking, however, and Farley and Trident stumbled into their path, effectively blocking the way.
Farley, flushed from drink, took in the sight of the two of them together, alone, and spat on the ground.
“How the mighty have fallen, Lady Natalie. Now you are not to be a duchess, you’re willing to take up with just about anybody?
” His eyes gleamed with malice, and he laughed vindictively.
“Does your papa know about this tête-à-tête?”
“Step off, Farley. You’re foxed and have obviously forgotten you are in the presence of a lady.” Garrett would like to have planted the bastard a facer but would not expose Natalie to violence. He was half concerned she would take it upon herself to join in the melee if one were to erupt.
Unpredictable chit.
With a wobble and a belch, Farley reached for the trunk of a tree to keep from tumbling to the ground. “Right you are, Hawthorne. But if that is the case, what is she doing out here with the likes of you?” Trident laughed and whacked Farley on the back.
The hearty slap was more than Farley could withstand, however, and ironically sent him flailing to the ground. Trident’s drunken momentum tumbled him into some bushes.
They were too sloshed to present any real danger.
Problem solved.
Shaking his head in amusement, Garrett looked over at Natalie and shrugged. She appeared to be holding back laughter. Best not to hang around here, though.
With one hand on the small of her back, Garrett steered Natalie and the pup clear of the two fallen cads and back to the house.
The men were drunk, but they were also members of the bloody ton.
This fact was laughable, and yet it illuminated the twisted culture inherent within society.
The power wielded by such an institution annoyed him.
Garrett didn’t know what these two had witnessed, but if they’d managed to see Garrett kissing Natalie, they would likely not keep the information to themselves. Not that he thought they would even remember the encounter, but if they did, they could instigate all manner of trouble.
The wrong kind of trouble.
Garrett needed to end this…whatever…with Lady Natalie. He could never offer for her. Because he cared for her. If she were to marry him, they would both regret it.
She wanted to be a mother.
She wanted children.
The gravity of this sank his heart like a stone.
He must set her free.