Chapter 13 Donovan
DONOVAN
As soon as I entered my house, I fielded a call from my sister, who called to complain about our mother.
These days, there were few times I declined my sister’s calls.
I harbored some guilt for some choices I made with her, including both abandoning her in New York to deal with my parents and checking out long before I physically left.
This was one way I atoned for it: being available to her now.
I threw her on speaker and did what I could while listening.
Our mother was trying to set her up with some ‘prospective suitors.’ She tried to pull that shit with me too, and I hated it then as much as I hated it now for my sister.
I was a little more headstrong than McKenna, so I was quicker to tell my mother to fuck right off.
McKenna was the kind of person to nod her head to keep the peace.
To be honest, I think she was still holding out hope that one day we would be one big, happy family, but that dream was delusional.
Parking outside of The Yard, I tried to wrap up the conversation with my sister.
“Kenna, at the end of the day, just tell her to fuck off. Better yet, agree to go out with someone and then don’t answer the door when they arrive.
That’ll make her look terrible.” The thought of my mother looking terrible brought a smile to my face.
“But I have plans I’m already late for…”
“You have plans?” She cut me off. “What are you doing? Donovan, I haven’t heard about you having plans in … I can’t even tell you the last time.”
“Yeah, I’m heading out with Maeve and her friends tonight.”
“Shut. Up. That’s great, Donovan! Where are you going?
” Although I had some personal shortcomings in the sibling department, my sister was the best person I knew.
She had been overly concerned with my well-being my entire life, but especially when things were very dark for me.
She’d leave me notes, drawings, pretty much anything to let me know she was thinking of me and loved me.
“Just the local bar. It was supposed to be a dart league thing, but now it’s karaoke.”
My sister’s squeal cut me off again. “Who in the hell are you trying to impress?” That’s the thing about family you’re close to.
They know all about you, and McKenna knew that karaoke wasn’t my thing these days.
“Have you done karaoke since you were a teenager? Wait … what are you going to sing?” She shot questions at me a mile a minute.
“Kenna. I have to go. I have no idea how to answer any of your questions right now.”
“You better call me tomorrow to let me know how it goes. Better yet, have someone take a photo and send it to me. No, a video!”
“Goodbye, Kenna.”
“Love you, Donovan. Have fun. I mean it, have a great time.”
“Love you too, McKenna.” I hung up before she went on a tangent about how proud she was that I was going out. She knew I mostly kept to myself these days.
Glancing at the clock before I got out, I was flustered that it was 7:30 p.m. My heart was beating fast, and I could actually feel the flush on my face. I really fucking hated being late. Taking a deep breath, I made my way inside and tried to settle the nerves that had taken hold.
It didn’t take long to find the group of them.
They had a big enough table to fit us all, including a seat for me, and the first thing I noticed was the ease with which they all sat together.
There was nothing but genuine love between them.
Any onlooker could see that. It looked like a good thing to be part of.
But when my eyes settled on Audra, holy shit.
I saw her before she saw me, so I got a few extra seconds to take her in.
Every time I saw her, she was more beautiful than the last. But her head snapped to me, and I saw the smile spread across her face.
Maybe she was as excited about me coming as I was about being here.
Hell, I was excited about the possibility of new beginnings with all the people here.
When I got to the table, I introduced myself, got a round of drinks, and settled myself next to Audra, apologizing to her for my delay.
“No worries, I was thinking maybe hanging out with a dart champion was more your thing, and karaoke was too far out of your comfort zone,” she jabbed.
Her rib, paired with the unbothered energy, set me at ease immediately.
So what if I was late for karaoke? It wasn’t the end of the world.
“Me? Out of my comfort zone? Audra, you must not know me well. Nothing is out of my comfort zone.” I lied.
Well, at least that was true of me in my past. These days, I was significantly more reserved.
“So I’m hearing … Kelly Clarkson solo, then? Full vibrato, of course.”
That brought an easy laugh out of me. “Joke’s on you for that one. Little do you know, my sister played KC on repeat. I could probably belt out entire albums of hers without even needing a screen for lyrics.”
“Challenge accepted!” She laughed. Though we jumped in and out of the group conversation, more often than not, I found myself wrapped up with just her. It was a quiet magic when we slipped into our little world.
Before we knew it, she was being dragged up on stage.
I couldn’t even tell you what song they sang, I just knew I couldn’t tear my gaze away.
She initially made embarrassed eye contact with me, but soon after got lost in it and danced around with the other girls.
Looking at them, I wished my sister had something like this.
Her friends were the high society bitches of New York, and I wouldn’t even call them friends.
Just a stupid social circle of vapid elites.
A few more songs played before the DJ announced the next act. “Donovan’s Dudes, please come to the stage.” Maeve’s hand went up to cover her smile, and I glared at her. Was this her doing?
“Alright, gents, that’s us.” Bennett stood up enthusiastically.
Nope, it was his. There was some groaning, but everyone else got up.
Everyone but me. This felt like a little too much, too soon.
I’d been here less than an hour, and I wasn’t looking to sing a song.
“Even you, Donovan. The band is named after you, after all. Only a wuss wouldn’t get up.
Or a chicken. You’re not either of those, are you, Wright? ”
His schoolyard taunts made me laugh. God, Bennett was something else. “I wouldn’t want to show you guys up. Can’t imagine someone built like you can sing. Aren’t you more suited for athletics?” I jokingly jabbed back at him and a huge grin spread across his face.
“I’m a gymnast in the bedroom, Wright, and I can usually make it to at least third base.” He joked back.
“Oh my God, yes.” Maverick smiled at the jockeying between us. “I love that there’s someone else that is ready to give Bennett shit. But wait, can you really sing, Donovan? Please say yes.”
“I’ll give it my best effort,” leaving it vague enough so no one knew what to expect. Lord knows I couldn’t carry a tune to save my soul. But Bennett didn’t have to know that.
He had chosen Sweet Caroline, and what we couldn’t sing for, we made up for in dancing.
Me. Donovan Wright.
In New York, the gossip sites had started calling me The Recluse because I had become completely unavailable, but tonight The Recluse was shaking his ass on a stage in a small South Carolina town with not a care in the world.
I should have had Audra take a video and send it to my sister because without evidence, she’d never believe I was up on stage.
After our rendition that brought thunderous applause, we sat back down.
“Well, I can’t say you brought your voice, but you can shake your ass Wright, I’ll give you that,” Bennett laughed.
“Hey,” Murphy interjected. “We’re having a poker night tomorrow at our house. Do you play?”
I looked around knowing full well he was talking to me, my brain just fumbled. “Me?”
“Yeah. It’s guys’ night. None of these beauties are allowed, but if you want to come by, it’s a small group of us, and it’s usually a good time.” It took so long for me to process the request that Murphy half-rescinded his offer. “No pressure or anything.”
“Yeah, I’d love to join,” I stuttered. “Thank you for the invite.” Once again, the interaction left me with a feeling of ease, like we were all just old friends.
I had a pang of sadness thinking about how easy my friendships with my travel group used to be.
Well, at least until Tommy’s death. The friendship between these guys reminded me a lot of my friends.
I wonder what they were up to, beyond the things I saw on social media.
Our lives were so performative by nature, I knew there was so much that went on beyond what was posted. Maybe I should reach out sometime.
The night progressed, and the thing that surprised me most was that after a couple of hours, I was able to relax in public, and it had nothing to do with how much alcohol I’d consumed.
Old habits die hard, and at the beginning of that evening, I found myself looking over my shoulder for paparazzi, but none appeared.
No one seemed to give a fuck about what I did in this small town, and I couldn’t be happier.
Towards the end of the evening, it was clear everything was wrapping up, and it looked like people were pairing off.
I briefly debated throwing out the suggestion for Audra to come home with me, but I had to be very careful how I played this.
The same concerns and reservations I had before were still there.
She was still Maeve’s best friend. I couldn’t lose Maeve.
Ergo, I couldn’t do something stupid with Audra.
I had never once hesitated to go for what I wanted, but I had to play this smart.
Soon after that, the night officially ended, and we all went our separate ways. Well, Audra and I went our separate ways. Everyone else seemed to have a partner. I would have loved to continue an evening with her, but that would come in time.