Chapter 23
Chapter
Twenty-Three
Arush of calm befalls me as Merlin and I move through the forest, making our way towards the edge of Sylvan.
I haven’t made my way this far out in a long time, and I failed to remember just how beautiful it is. Spring only enhances the forest's beauty.
I forgot about the blossom grove that sits out this way, the tall trees giving way to the shorter ones. The trees that are nothing more than bare branches through the winter but transform into what looks like falling snow in the spring.
I can’t help but feel a hint of relief as I pass over the small bridge that marks the edge of Sylvan’s boundary.
There is so much tension here, too many things that flood my mind every time I walk into that town square.
New memories that I wish I didn’t have. And as much as I hate to leave my friends here, it feels liberating to be out of reach, even if it is merely for a few days.
Lenthara is a two-day ride from Sylvan, but by taking the forest road I’ll be bypassing the town, and hopefully all the shields who still patrol the area.
Though my lack of disturbance doesn’t last long, because just as I’m about to round the corner, I hear hooves on the wooden bridge.
“Did you think you could leave without saying goodbye?” That voice sends gooseflesh up my neck despite the deep purple cloak I have wrapped around my shoulders.
I pull on Merlin’s reins, bringing him to a halt as I look back to see sandy hair pushed back by the light breeze that sweeps through the trees.
My lips part, and I feel my cheeks flush at the mere sight of him. It is pathetic and misplaced.
I clear my throat. “You needed to come out here simply to say goodbye?”
“No.” That smirk makes a timely appearance. “Of course not. I am accompanying you.”
A laugh bubbles from my throat. “No. No, you are not.”
He directs his horse in front of mine. “I can assure you I am. I even have apples.”
I shake my head before following after him. “You need to turn around, Rylan.”
“Do I?” he muses.
I look around, as if a squirrel in the trees could help me. “Yes.”
He tips his head as if he’s thinking it over, but I know better. “I think I’ll keep going, actually.”
My teeth catch the inside of my cheek, and I bite down instead of sending obscenities in his direction. “I do not need an escort, Rylan.”
“I beg to differ based on the number of times I’ve had to save you from your own fate.”
I scoff, but I can’t bring myself to disagree. We were both there—both times. But if Rylan accompanies me, all he will provide is a distraction, and that's the last thing I need or want.
I want quiet and serenity in my own company—not the company of the one person who leaves me with a multitude of questions after every interaction.
I am still wary of him, even after what he told me last night in the forest. There is something he’s not telling me. I just haven’t figured out what that is yet.
“It’s going to take days to get to where I am going,” I say, hoping he has work, or that the long journey will dissuade him.
But he just looks over his shoulder with a grin. “Lucky I like being on horseback.”
A sigh falls from my lips. “I’m not getting rid of you, am I?”
He pulls his golden cream-coloured horse to a stop in front of me, forcing Merlin to stop. Any humour glittering in his eyes is now absent. “I’d never forgive myself if something happened to you and I wasn't here.”
My lips part, but I don’t speak.
When I stay silent, Rylan simply pulls his horse around and continues down the path. Merlin walks on after him.
I remember the first time I ever spoke to Rylan.
When he told me that at his core, all he feels is regret.
I can imagine he is a person who doesn’t forgive himself for a great deal.
Instead, he subconsciously replays his mistakes, perhaps agonizing over whether he could have done things differently.
“Your stableboy wasn’t so pleased when I left with one of his horses,” he says, his tone entirely unserious once more.
My mouth falls open. “You stole that horse from the stables?”
“Of course not,” he says, and the lilt in his voice tells me he’s wearing that signature smirk. “I simply…borrowed it.” He shrugs.
I shake my head, not that he can see me from where Merlin walks behind his borrowed horse.
“I didn’t let it be known that I was coming to find you, of course. Lest he try to ride out here himself.”
I don’t dignify his taunts with an answer.
“I am surprised he didn’t try to come with you in the first place,” he continues. “Not that I’m certain he would have been able to do much in the whole saving you aspect of things.”
I bite down on the inside of my lip, forcing myself to stay silent.
I didn’t question the fact that Silas didn’t offer to accompany me, not until now.
Not that I would have accepted—I wanted to do this on my own.
I still do, but it seems I do not have a single scrap of control over the situation any longer.
“What is it between you two?”
My brows wrench together. “Excuse me?”
“It’s just…” He stays quiet for a moment, almost like he’s thinking about what he really wants to say instead of teasing me some more. “He seems considerably possessive of you, Rosie.”
This line of conversation makes my stomach turn. The forest is devoid of any noise, as if it is listening all the same.
“He’s protective,” is all I can manage.
“Right,” he nods. “That’s why he’s shovelling manure instead of being here.”
“You don’t understand,” I shake my head.
“Then tell me.”
My breath catches in my lungs. How do I explain what we are when I’m not even certain myself?
“Take your time,” Rylan drawls. “We have an abundance of it.”
I roll my eyes. It’s none of his business, yet I find myself wanting to talk about it, nonetheless. Perhaps saying all of it out loud will clarify my own confusion.
“I’ve known Silas since I was a child. He grew up with my brother and me. He…he became a part of our family.”
“Ah, so he’s like your sibling,” he deduces.
“Well,” I pause, “not exactly.” Rylan goes eerily silent. “Silas, he’s been there for me through…through everything. He understands me like no one else can because of everything we have shared. He just…”
“He cares for you,” Rylan says, with no teasing or malice in his tone, just perception.
“He does,” I breathe. He cares. Everything he’s ever done, any fear he’s had or any arguments between us—it’s always been because he cares. I can’t help but wonder what he would think if he found out that Rylan is accompanying me. He would care.
“And you care for him,” Rylan adds.
I’m not certain whether it is a question or a statement, but the answer gets lodged in my throat. “Yes,” I admit. “I care a great deal for him.”
Rylan nods, but he doesn’t utter a word, his silence my only companion as I contemplate what he is thinking.
There are no more questions, no more teasing. In fact, it feels like we go hours without speaking. It is exactly what I wanted—the quiet and calm—but it feels wrong.
“Do you have siblings?” I ask into the wide-open silence.
A quiet laugh skates through his teeth. “No.”
“Oh.” The air around us feels tense, rife with questions that wait on the tip of my tongue, but I don’t let them slide out. Not as I take in the way Rylan’s posture is far stiffer than moments ago.
“My father most likely forced my mother to take a tonic after having me,” he mutters. “I don’t suppose he wanted to deal with any more children after I was born.”
I want to ask what he means, why his father wouldn’t want that, or what their relationship was like. But I don’t, and within moments, we slip back into uncomfortable silence. But all I can do is wonder.
A cold breeze paints my cheeks with a flush as the sky grows dark above the trees. We’ve been riding for hours, neither of us stopping for a break, and my bottom is feeling the effects. We must be less than a day’s ride from Lenthara now. With sensible breaks, it takes two days from Sylvan.
Just as I open my mouth to suggest that we stop, a cold drop of water lands on my cheek, sending a chill across my face.
Within moments, I can hear the melodic sound of rain—the quiet buzz of water trickling through the leaves. It grounds me for a mere moment before my grip on Merlin’s reins grows slick with rain.
The water falls fast, and I can feel it penetrating the fabric of my cloak. I know I will be numb with cold very soon if we don’t find shelter, but I can't help but soak it all in for a moment.
“Come on!” Rylan shouts through the noise as he turns his horse to head into the forest.
I pull Merlin to follow him, picking up into a gallop as Rylan’s horse speeds through the trees, the rain blurring my vision.
But Merlin moves with intention, weaving through the trees until the sound of water feels as though it might envelop us.
He slows to a trot and all of a sudden, the rain becomes more hushed.
I push the hood of my cloak off my head and wipe the water from my eyelashes before I realise where we are. Very few drops of water fall in my hair, nothing like the downpour that I can still hear somewhere in the distance.
A hand falls upon my leg, and I look down to see Rylan standing beside me.
His hands find my waist as I swing off Merlin’s back, steadying me, and I can’t help the way my body remembers the last time we were this close, when he held that dagger to my throat.
Those feelings rush through me once more.
“Did you bring it with you?” he murmurs, his voice low in my ear and his hands still firmly on my waist. My temperature spikes as a flurry of sparks light up my system. He’s thinking of it too.
“Did you think I would make a trip with no means of protecting myself?” I whisper. “I’m not as feckless as you think, smithy.”
“Good,” is all he says before his warmth disappears from my back. My breath rushes out.