Chapter 7 #2
This was how they had been before dinner as well. When Madeleine had come in and announced that dinner was ready, Sir Geoffrey and Lady Gabrielle appeared reluctant to eat. But the conversations started up again over their food, and soon there was a lot of laughter.
David had joined in as well as he and Sir Geoffrey told the girls about the antics David and Caroline had got up to when they were children. Henrietta had barely stopped laughing, while Gwen was wide-eyed that her older brother was such a wayward boy. It was quite adorable.
The evening had been a success so far. Caroline didn’t want it to stop, for Henrietta and Gwen’s sake.
It was sweet, and her parents had brightened up having guests.
It was rare for any of them to have guests of any kind, so to interact with someone new was something they all grasped at.
Caroline could see her father looking happier than he had been for a long time.
As she sat in the window seat, leaning against the window while the girls entertained her parents, Caroline’s thoughts went to what David had said earlier. About the ball.One that she hadn’t been invited to.
Part of Caroline was glad that she didn’t have to go – she did have lots of people openly staring at her, and it was frustrating to have to deal with that, but she was a little annoyed that she had been ignored.
It felt more satisfying to turn down an invitation, especially if her parents didn’t know she had received it.
Being omitted completely felt insulting.
However, with her current position, it was like everyone knew that it wouldn’t matter if she was invited or not: it wouldn’t change her situation.
Nothing was going to give her family money, and she wouldn’t end up with an advantageous marriage.
She wasn’t worth a second glance if she didn't have money. Beauty meant nothing if wealth wasn’t there as well, and it made Caroline angry. How was that fair?
Hopefully, she could find something with her job search.
Becoming a governess hadn’t been something she expected to do, but now it seemed like the only thing she could do.
Even if they were desperate, Caroline would not do a job like Madeleine’s; that would really be scraping the barrel, and she had more pride than expected.
Being a governess, though, sounded better.
Caroline had enjoyed her studies and considered herself to be rather bright, so it would be easy enough for her to teach children.
She should have enough patience to do it.
And it meant she got paid. Of course, all of her money would be going back to her parents to help with the house and the estate.
From what Caroline had found out, a governess’ wages were pretty good.
This could work. She knew it could.
“What’s on your mind?”
Caroline jumped. She hadn’t noticed David joining her, leaning against the wall and watching her with a slight smile. Aware that her heart was thudding against her chest, which was momentarily distracting, Caroline managed a small smile.
“I’m just thinking. There’s a lot going on that I have to worry about.”
“Worry?” David gave her a half-smile. “I know all about that. I think I’ve done nothing but worry for the last few months.”
Caroline couldn’t imagine. She couldn’t begin to know how he felt having a title thrust upon him suddenly. She looked back at Henrietta and Gwen.
“Your sisters and my parents are getting on really well. I was hoping for that, but at the same time, I was expecting it. If that makes sense?”
“I know what you mean.” David’s eyes warmed. “I’m glad about it as well, especially after Gwen's embarrassing comments before we came in.”
“It wasn’t embarrassing. She’s just a curious girl.”
“And it made me want to go and hide.”
Caroline giggled.
“You, go and hide? I don’t think you’d ever do that.”
“I have my moments, Caroline.” David hesitated, his fading smile. “Forgive me for mentioning the ball earlier. I had no idea that you hadn’t …”
“Don’t be embarrassed,” Caroline cut him off. “It’s nothing new, I’m afraid.”
“You mean this has been happening for a while?”
“Only in the last couple of years. I got invitations, but mostly I was ignored. The one time I did question it, I was told by the snooty girl who was hosting that I didn’t bring anything to the party, so there was no point in inviting me.
” Caroline shrugged. “It hurt at the time, but she does have a point. I don’t bring anything to a social gathering. ”
David snorted.
“That’s not true. You bring a lot to everyone.”
“Like what?”
“Your warm nature, your sharp wit, and quick mind. I’ve always imagined you gaining the attention of everyone in the room.”
Caroline sighed.
“Unfortunately, that’s not going to happen unless I become a very rich woman overnight. Then again, that would end up with me attracting the attention of those who want something from me, and it’s not me as a person.”
David was silent in response. Feeling a little embarrassed about her comment – although relieved that her parents hadn’t heard her – Caroline got up and walked to the far end of the room.
Two huge bookcases from floor to ceiling lined the wall filled with books.
Caroline had read everything on both bookcases and had started rereading them.
It was a nice way to while away the evenings, especially when it was cold outside, and the family was settled in front of the fire.
It made her feel better that she could escape from life for just a little while.
If only they could get her to completely escape. Caroline loved her parents, and the love was always there; the warmth in the house never left, even on the coldest days. But when they were running low on funds and wondering where the rest was coming from, it was getting harder to ignore.
Her parents might think things would calm down enough eventually, but they had been saying that for some time now. Caroline had lost count of how many times she had heard it would get better eventually.
Don’t think like that tonight. This is meant to be a good time. Everyone is having fun. Put it to one side and smile.
“Have you managed to read everything here?”
Caroline jumped and spun around, bumping into David. He chuckled as he caught her arms when she wobbled. Her face now burning, Caroline disentangled herself as gracefully as she could.
“I’m going through the books a second time,” she mumbled.
“You are?” David looked up at both bookcases. “I’m impressed. I would have thought these would keep you quiet for the rest of your life.”
“I can read pretty quickly. You know I can.”
“I do, but there are so many. And you’ve read them all?”
Caroline smiled.
“You’d be surprised at how fast I can get through a book.”
“With you, I think I’m getting surprised at just about everything.” David turned to her with a wry smile. “It’s like I don’t remember you at all. You’re different, Caroline. Or maybe I was an immature brat who didn’t really pay attention to you when we were children.”
Caroline didn’t know what to say to that. She was still staring at him when she heard her father speak across the room.
“Caroline, is the piano still in tune?”
“What?” Caroline turned away from David’s stare with a frown. “Why do you want the piano?”
“Because Henrietta has told me that she plays the piano, and I want to hear her.” Sir Geoffrey beamed at the girl, who blushed. “It’s been a while since we’ve had someone play it. My wife’s hands are not what they used to be, so I’ve missed hearing the dulcet tones of a piano in the house.”
Henrietta turned and looked at her brother with wide eyes. Gwen let out a giggle.
“Go on, Henrietta! You’re always bossing me around when we’re having our lessons and saying you could do what I’m doing. You should show us what you can do.”
Caroline was about to say that she wouldn’t force Henrietta to do something she didn’t want to do, but David spoke instead of her.
“Let’s see what Henrietta says. She’s a little shy about performing for other people.”
“Oh!” Sir Geoffrey reached over and patted Henrietta’s hand. “Forgive me for getting so excited. I just haven’t heard our piano being played for a long time …”
“I’ll do it.”
Caroline stared at the girl.
“Are you sure?” she asked.
“I am. There’s no harm in seeing if the piano works.” Henrietta got to her feet and dusted down her skirts. “Do you have any music I can play? I’m not good at playing something from memory.”
“Oh, you will be able to find it in the stool at the piano,” Lady Gabrielle interjected. “There should be something there for you. Caroline, dear, would you help us move into the morning room?”
“I … alright.” Caroline glanced at David. “We shouldn’t ask Lady Henrietta to perform, though. She’s a guest.”
David smiled and leaned towards her.
“If Henrietta doesn’t mind, might as well let her get on with it,” he whispered. “You won’t be disappointed.”
Caroline didn’t know what to say to that.