2. Naomi
TWO
Naomi
T he sound of crunching metal.
That was all I could remember.
I blinked as I stared up at the florescent lights above me. Right, I was in the hospital.
How had I not died?
I narrowed my eyes as I tried to remember what had happened. I was angry. I was looking for Walker. I was T-boned by a car.
I winced as the memory of searing pain shot through me.
I’d survived. I wasn’t dead. Although with the way I felt, I wished I had.
I tried to shift in my bed, but my entire body ached. I glanced down to see that my right leg was bandaged and raised. I couldn’t move it, so I must have done something to it. I thought I remembered a nurse saying something was broken, but I didn’t catch what part .
Tears stung my eyes as I blinked. I tried to move my head, but everything ached. I moved to touch my face and winced. I was pretty banged up. And that was only confirmed by the nurse who had walked into my room earlier and, at first glance, pulled back.
I must look like a mess.
And I was alone.
Had Walker come to see me? Did he know? I wanted to find my phone, but I couldn’t. I was wearing a hospital gown, and my purse wasn’t in sight. I knew that I should have a call button, but I didn’t know where.
I’d never felt so alone.
There was a strong, steady knock on my door. I parted my lips to speak, but my voice was hoarse, so the words “come in” were soft and raspy.
The knocks came again, and I tried harder to speak. “Come in.” It took a lot of effort to make those words loud enough that the person on the other side of the door could hear. My lungs burned from the impact of the airbags, and I felt as if I were dying.
Whatever pain meds they were giving me weren’t strong enough. I was intensely aware of every bruise on my body. Every torn piece of flesh.
The door opened. My heart rate picked up as I anticipated Walker’s furrowed brow and deep frown. But I was met with the intense stare of my brother. I wanted to say that I welcomed the sight of him, but I didn’t.
I wanted Walker.
“Jackson?” I rasped out. I tried to peer to the side to see if Walker was behind him, but I couldn’t move, and it hurt too much to try.
“Naomi?” he asked as he entered the room. Even though his hair was long and draped over his forehead, I could see furrows as he frowned.
Tears were flowing now. I wasn’t sure if it was because of the pain I was feeling or the sadness washing through me that my brother was the first to visit me and not the man who swore to love me forever.
“Yeah,” I whispered. I wanted to mask my disappointment, but I couldn’t. I was exhausted and tired, and there was no way I could emotionally pick through what was happening.
He was at the side of my bed, and I watched as his gaze swept over me. “What happened?”
What was I going to tell him? That Walker cheated on me? That I’d gotten in the car to go after him? Jackson didn’t like Walker as it was. If he knew that I went out at night to find the man only to get into a car crash, that would be it. He wouldn’t ever let me hear the end of it.
I was still trying to sift through my emotions. I didn’t need my big brother coming in and confusing me.
“I don’t know. I can’t remember.” And that was how I was going to leave it. Until I could talk to Walker, I wasn’t going to tell the whole story. I was just out and about, that was it.
Plus, my throat was too raw and filled with emotions.
Thankfully, he didn’t seem like he really expected an answer. I watched him study my face, my hands, and then my bandaged legs. My right leg was suspended in the air above the bed.
“Ah, are you family?” Dr. Williams asked as he stopped in the doorway.
“I’m her brother.”
Dr. Williams grabbed my chart and headed into the room. “Good. We were waiting for her support system to come in before we discussed what was going on.”
I nodded. They’d told me a lot, but my head was so cloudy from the pain and the drugs, that I didn’t remember anything they’d said.
I settled against the pillow as Dr. Williams started his analysis. I watched as Jackson nodded—relieved that someone else could comprehend what was going on. If they expected me to remember everything my doctor said, that wasn’t going to work. My brain felt like mush.
“…broken bones means months of therapy,” Dr. Williams continued.
That made sense. I’d seen enough TV hospital dramas to know my condition wasn’t good. It was going to take time once my bones healed to return to full function.
“…prepare for the baby…”
I blinked.
What did he just say?
I glanced around the room. There were no children here. Sure, Jackson was dating a girl he’d met on Magnolia, but he wasn’t a father.
At least, I didn’t think he was .
“Wait, did you just say baby?” Jackson asked at the same time I rasped, “What baby?”
Dr. Williams stopped and looked at both of us. “Naomi is pregnant.”
I stared at him. I saw his lips move, and I heard the words, but they weren’t registering.
“You’re pregnant?” Jackson asked, his attention now on me.
I swallowed, wincing as my raw throat screamed. “I didn’t know.”
“We were surprised the baby survived the trauma you experienced, but it’s a fighter.” Dr. Williams smiled. “From the ultrasound, I’d say you’re about five months along.”
“You’re pregnant?” Jackson asked again.
My world felt as if it were spinning. Nothing seemed to be making sense.
The accident.
The baby.
I wanted so badly to shake my head so I could clear it enough to process what was going on—but just moving my attention from Jackson to Dr. Williams made my head feel like it was being squeezed in a vice. Any shaking would send me into a tailspin of pain. So, I was left sitting there, trying to understand what was happening.
“Well, I’ll leave you two to talk. I have another patient to see. I’ll send in the nurse to check on you in a bit.”
Jackson pulled his attention away from me and nodded at Dr. Williams.
“Feel free to use the call button if you need it.” Dr. Williams nodded toward the small white box attached to the bed.
That’s where that was. “Thanks,” I whispered.
He shut the door behind him, leaving Jackson and me alone. I turned my attention back to my brother, who had started pacing by my bed. “You’re moving to Magnolia,” he muttered before he whispered, “Baby.”
“I can’t move to Magnolia. I have a life in North Carolina. I have a job.” I had Walker.
Even though he was the reason I was in the hospital, I couldn’t fully blame him for this. After all, he didn’t make the car hit me. And I wasn’t even sure he’d cheated on me. Sure, there had been a girl on the other end of that phone call. But she could have been anyone.
Was I willing to throw away my life on an assumption? Was that fair to Walker? Especially if I was pregnant…
Pregnant. My stomach felt as if it were flip-flopping.
“You have a severely bruised hip and a broken leg,” Jackson said as he waved toward my bed. “You are in no shape to take care of yourself.” He shook his head like I was being ridiculous. “You’ll have people who can help take care of you in Magnolia.”
“Jackson,” I said, as loud as my throat would let me. But he didn’t seem to notice.
“I’ll have to have Archer build a ramp for the porch so it can accommodate your wheelchair.” I could see him making a mental list of the things he needed to do. To him, this was already decided. I had no choice in the matter.
But I wasn’t going to give up without a fight. I was pregnant. I needed to find Walker, and leaving North Carolina seemed like the worst idea. How was I going to find him if I was states away? I cleared my throat. “Jackson, listen to me.”
He kept pacing and muttering to himself. I could only imagine the list he was creating was growing longer and longer.
Finally, I gathered my strength. “I’m not moving to Magnolia!” All the pain came to a head, and I collapsed against the pillow, squeezing my eyes shut.
That seemed to do the trick. Through the slits of my eyes, I saw him cease his pacing as he turned to face me.
“I’m not moving to Magnolia,” I whispered.
Jackson shook his head. “You can’t stay here.”
Tears began to well up in my eyes once more. Which surprised me. I felt as if I’d cried all the moisture from my body since I woke up, but apparently not. “I can’t leave my life here.”
“Is it the father?”
I pursed my lips. Jackson knew very little about Walker. I’d done a good job at keeping my love life a secret from my overprotective brother. The last thing I needed was Jackson heading up a mob to murder the man. Especially if he found out that the whole reason I was in the car in the first place was to track down Walker.
It was better if no one knew about the father until I could talk to him. Which wasn’t going to happen if I allowed Jackson to drag me to Magnolia. “It was a one- night stand.” For some reason, that was less embarrassing than admitting my relationship status with Walker.
Jackson was quiet. I could see his rage slowly simmering behind his gaze, but thankfully, he recognized I was a grown woman and didn’t need his brotherly protection anymore. At least, that was what I pretended he was thinking.
“What are you going to do?”
I swallowed. I’d just been in an accident, and thinking ahead didn’t seem like something I was capable of right now. But there were a few things I was going to have to face no matter what. First, I was going to have this baby. There were no other options for me.
But beyond the birth…I wasn’t sure.
And in terms of Walker? I was clueless.
“I don’t know, Jackson. I’m bedbound. I’m hurting. I’m tired, and yet the pain won’t let me sleep.” I couldn’t stop the flow of words, so I closed my eyes and let them out. “I’m hungry. I’m nauseous. I have no clue what I’m going to do about my future, and it seems like I don’t have enough time to figure it out.” I opened my eyes and met his gaze. “I’m scared.”
He frowned, crossed the room, and grasped onto my hand. He held it as he stared down at me. “You’re not alone. I will be here for everything. The rehab” —he swallowed— “the baby.”
I gave him a weak smile even if doing so made my skin feel tight against the scabs I was sure were all over my face. “Thanks. ”
He nodded. “Of course. I won’t ever leave your side.”
I sighed, my body relaxing at his words. Even though I felt confused as to what I needed to do, I knew that with him by my side, I would be safe, no matter what the future held.
A month later, I stared at my now empty house. The house we’d grown up in. The house that had become my home. All of my furniture was either sold or in storage for when I found a place to plant some roots.
My hope that Walker would come back had dwindled to a chunk of coal. I’d warded off Jackson’s insistence to move in order to give Walker an opportunity to walk back into my life. But he’d never texted or called.
No matter how many messages I left begging him to contact me, he didn’t. I felt as if I were screaming into a void, and no one heard me.
After two weeks, Jackson declared my stubborn streak over. I was coming to Magnolia if I liked it or not. I wanted to fight him, but I had no strength. So, I gave in, and at the same time, I gave up hope that Walker would ever hold true to his promise to marry me.
My life with Walker was over, and I was too tired to hang onto what we once had.
I knew Magnolia wasn’t my resting place—even if I didn’t know where my resting place was going to be.
I wheeled over to the window and stared out at the large willow tree that hung over the small pond in the back. I pressed on my eyelids, forcing myself not to cry.
After all, I’d cried so much these last few weeks that I was certain I was certifiably dehydrated. When I asked Henry, my physical therapist, he just laughed it off and told me to drink more water.
“I’m doing the right thing,” I whispered. My fingers found my stomach, and I held them there. Thankfully, the morning sickness that I’d just written off as stress had subsided, and I felt a bit more alive.
After talking with Dr. Williams, and having a small breakdown that included full denial, I finally allowed the OB to check on me before I left the hospital. She confirmed that I was five months pregnant, and everything looked great.
She instructed that I get in touch with an OB as soon as I could as my condition will likely make birth difficult. I still had some time for my hip to heal, but they didn’t want to leave things to chance.
It wasn’t until Jackson wheeled me out of her office and down to the elevator that reality kicked in. I was wheelchair-bound, broken, and pregnant.
Now, as I sat in my once full house, I was homeless, jobless…and alone.
How on earth was I going to be able to bring a baby into this world? Not only was my body at risk, but there was no way I could care for myself, much less another person .
I swallowed back my tears, forcing myself to be stronger. I could do this.
I could…
I shook my head.
I could lie to Jackson. I could lie to the doctor. I could even lie to Henry, but I knew the truth.
I was the furthest thing from okay. And I feared I’d never get there.
“Ready?” Jackson asked. His curly hair was damp with sweat and clung to his forehead as he stepped into the room.
Despite the fact that it was fall, summer was still hanging on with over ninety-degree heat. On days like this, Rhode Island sounded exciting. I was ready for a reprieve from the oven-like temperatures.
“I don’t know, Jackson.” I didn’t want to go. The uncertainty of the future terrified me. Leaving my home. Leaving my job. It all seemed like too much. I could feel the cloud of depression hang over me.
Plus, what if Walker did come back? What if something had happened to him, and he forgot who I was? If I left, I was closing the door on our relationship.
Was I ready to drive the last nail into that coffin?
He shook his head and let out a sigh. He was tired of talking about this. “Once you get to Magnolia, things will get better. Fiona set up a space for you in my guest room, and Archer finished the ramp on the deck. It’s all ready to go.”
Leave it to my brother to think the things I feared were the logistics. To him it was all about where I was going to sleep and if I could get around. He didn’t look at things on an emotional level. I was giving up my friends, my life, and my romantic relationship to move to Magnolia.
He would never understand how helpless I felt. I was an independent woman. I liked my autonomy. I still wanted the father of my child in my life, and I feared once I was gone, that chance might be gone as well.
“The rideshare is waiting for us, so if you’re done, we should go.” He nodded toward the front door and moved to stand behind my chair.
“Wait,” I said, raising my hand. I wanted to memorize this place. I never wanted to forget.
This was my life, and I needed a minute to say goodbye to it. Maybe I was silently hoping that if I stayed just a little bit longer, Walker would come walking through the door I was about to be pushed out of.
Jackson growled but stayed put.
I stared out the window. I stared out at the memories I’d made here. I stared at my past and whispered, “Goodbye.”
Then I nodded as I turned to face Jackson. “I’m ready.”
Walker wasn’t coming, and I needed to move on for me and my child.
If my brother could have cheered, he would have. He pushed me at a pace that meant he was ready to get out of here. He locked the door and then pushed me to the car and lifted me inside .
I tried to adjust myself as he put my wheelchair in the trunk. A truck with my things was already on its way to Magnolia. Since Jackson lost his license because of his worsening eyesight, we were flying.
Which was good for me. I doubted I could sit in a car for long.
I stared out the window as the car started driving down my street. Tears filled my eyes once more, and even though I wanted to blame it on pregnancy hormones, I knew that was a lie.
The life I’d been living was over. My home. My job. My friends. My relationship with Walker. It was all over, and I couldn’t ignore the pain in my heart.
My life was forever changed, and there was nothing I could do about it.
That was a terrifying thought.