Chapter 20 #2
“Matlock, my parents’ estate, is also beautifully situated and rather close to Pemberley. You should visit it too, Miss Bennet.”
“Thank you for suggesting it, Colonel. I will certainly do so as soon as the opportunity arises. And I would also like to see Tidestone.”
“Both of them are not more than an hour’s ride from Pemberley on a good day with a good horse,” the colonel continued, and Elizabeth laughed nervously.
“Well, that is not a very helpful recommendation for me, sir. I see no possibility of my riding in any direction anytime soon.”
“Yes, I remember, you delight in walking. I fondly recall our strolls in the Rosings gardens.”
“You are too kind, sir,” Elizabeth answered, struggling to sound easier than she felt.
Recollections of Rosings strolls included the day she had confirmation of Darcy’s intervention in separating Jane and Bingley, awkward meetings with Darcy, and a letter offered and ripped apart —all painful and unpleasant images.
“Despite the weather tomorrow, Miss Bennet will stay at Pemberley long enough that you could show it to her on all sorts of days, from sunny to snowy,” Darcy addressed his sister.
“True,” the girl answered animatedly. “Oh, I just realised we have not decided which rooms we will give to Lizzy.”
“She should take the chambers next to yours,” Lady Hardwick said in earnest as if this were a significant decision.
Elizabeth could hardly keep her countenance, considering the reaction of her mother, Mrs. Phillips, and Lady Lucas had they known a young heiress and a countess were preoccupied with which rooms to offer her at one of the largest estates in the North.
“I think Miss Bennet should visit several available rooms in the family wing and choose for herself,” Darcy intervened.
“Yes, of course; that is what we shall do,” Georgiana agreed.
“There is no need, sir.” Elizabeth ventured to meet Darcy’s gaze. “Any room will be perfect, I am sure. I would like to be as close as possible to Georgiana if that is convenient for you.”
“Of course it is convenient, Lizzy; it would be perfect.”
“Then no other choice is necessary. I am sure all the rooms are perfectly comfortable and beautifully furnished.”
“I would hope they are,” Darcy responded, his eyes now holding Elizabeth’s. “But it might be the view that makes the difference. Each room has a balcony from which the sight of the estate can be admired.”
“You are very considerate, sir,” she replied, flustered.
“I have no doubt that all the views are wonderful at Pemberley, though. That would certainly make my choice even more difficult. It is a tragedy, indeed, to be forced to choose between several versions of perfection. I am afraid I will become quite spoiled,” she joked.
“You should take this opportunity to make your choice, Miss Bennet, while Darcy offers it to you. It will rarely happen again. As I mentioned several months ago during our lovely walks at Rosings, Darcy arranges things just as he pleases,” the colonel teased his cousin.
Darcy’s countenance remained serious, and Elizabeth became uneasy at the prospect of his believing she had gossiped with the colonel at his expense. It was not entirely untrue, but she wondered that the colonel mentioned it. It happened at another place, another time, with another Elizabeth…
“I do remember what you told me, Colonel,” she answered. “What I did not know then and I do know now, as I begin to know Mr. Darcy better, is that most of the time he makes arrangements not so much for his own liking but for the well-being of the people in his care.”
She observed that Darcy was surprised by her small praise; their eyes locked again for a moment, and his expression slowly softened.
“That is so true,” the countess responded.
“My two estates are better managed by my nephew than they were by my beloved late husband. And while I did appreciate surprises and the unexpected when I was younger, now I feel safe and at peace every time this young man makes plans that involve me. I can scarcely remember more than two occasions when he has been wrong about something.” Darcy smiled and kissed his aunt’s hand.
“You are too kind, dear aunt; I have been wrong more times than I like to admit. And I do appreciate surprises and the unexpected too, as long as they do not mean any possible harm for those in my care. When I am alone, I do tend to do foolish things, I assure you.”
A shiver ran along Elizabeth’s arms, and a lump in her throat kept her silent; she knew he was right. She was perfectly aware of several circumstances when he had done things that he might call foolish, and she also had the chance to experience the benefit of his actions and his plans.
“Well, the ladies seem determined to praise you while you can only blame yourself, and neither opinion is wrong,” the colonel added. “After knowing you for eight and twenty years, I might say that your virtues spring from your character and your faults from your manners.”
“Excellent description,” Lady Hardwick agreed. “That is Darcy indeed.”
“Most of the things I do and say are excellent,” the colonel replied, laughing. “As you see, I am not at all willing to point out any of my own deficiencies.”
Elizabeth said nothing, but her eyes returned to Darcy and held his again. He appeared discomposed and reluctant to receive praise, and his uneasiness touched her heart.
Yes, she could see the truth in the colonel’s description —which was why she had only seen his faults and had remained oblivious to his merits. It was much easier for her —and for everybody in Meryton —to observe his manners than to understand his character.
“So, speaking of manners less seriously and gravely, you still owe Georgiana and me a story, my dear nephew.” The countess smiled mischievously.
Darcy was puzzled. “What story?”
“The story of your calling Miss Bennet ‘tolerable’ and refusing to dance with her. I asked her earlier, but she insisted you should be present when that tale is disclosed. It must be very grave,” the countess said mockingly.
The colonel was dumbfounded, and Georgiana blushed with worry for the discomfort of her brother and her friend.
“Aunt Amelia…”
“Oh hush, dearest.” The countess waved her hand, refusing to be deterred from her purpose.
Elizabeth flushed, torn between amusement and embarrassment, and wondered what Darcy would say. To her complete disbelief, a small smile narrowed his eyes and twisted his lips.
“Yes…that story; do I have any chance of refusing you, Aunt?”
“Not a single one, my dear.”
“Very well —I see you cruelly insist on laughing at my expense. Then it depends on Miss Bennet; if she agrees, I will tell it.”
“Do tell, sir. I have nothing against it. Why should we keep a secret that is disclosed by my mother at every opportunity and discussed frequently?” Elizabeth responded, still in jest.
Darcy breathed deeply then met Elizabeth’s gaze another moment, and his smile widened.
“It was the middle of October last year about three weeks after Bingley took possession of Netherfield. An assembly was held in Meryton. Bingley insisted I should go with them, and I had no argument to resist him. I confess that I found little enjoyment in the event for personal reasons,” he admitted, and everyone knew to what he referred.
He paused for an instant then continued in a tone that obviously struggled to remain easy.
“So, to end any argument, I attended, but my mood was not suitable for the occasion, and I am sure my behaviour clearly showed it. Once there, Bingley went on and on, insisting on my dancing. I struggled to deter him but with little success. I must also mention that I had danced with Miss Bingley and Mrs. Hurst and had every intention of avoiding a repetition.”
“Well, I can empathise with that,” the colonel intervened. “I have rarely seen a lady as handsome and smart —and as unpleasant —as Miss Bingley.”
“At that time, the only fault for my vexation belonged to my mood; Miss Bingley was not to blame. Instead of leaving me alone, Bingley returned to me after each dance and insisted that I dance. He pointed out Miss Bennet to me —whom, I confess, I barely noticed until that moment. I surely did not remember anything about her, but in order to escape Bingley’s annoying solicitation, I told him that Miss Bennet was tolerable but not handsome enough to tempt me!
I was not aware that, sadly, Miss Bennet heard me —and was rightfully offended by my words —until much later when I discovered that all of Meryton was speaking of the incident. ”
“You did not!” the countess exclaimed.
“Oh, dear Lord,” Georgiana whispered.
Elizabeth forced a laugh. She was less distressed by the story itself than by the recollection of that crucial moment that marked the development of their acquaintance and led to the dreadful day at the Parsonage.
“It is truly not a reason for distress now. But yes, I confess that, back then, my pride was offended. There is nothing a girl wants more at a ball than to dance.”
“That is correct,” Lady Hardwick agreed. “Such behaviour is unacceptable. What was wrong with you, young man?”
The colonel hurried to take his cousin’s side, laughing loudly.
“Well, although I cannot understand why anyone would ever refuse to dance with Miss Bennet, I can sympathise with Darcy. Upon my word, Bingley is sometimes so annoying in his persistence that even I would say anything to get rid of him.”
“It seems his persistence ensured him a most fortunate marriage, so in the end, it turned out well. But that was the story Mrs. Bennet mentioned with understandable resentment. I take this opportunity to publicly and officially beg Miss Bennet to forgive my rudeness,” Darcy bowed towards her solemnly, his voice half grave, half in jest.
Elizabeth blushed, but her discomfort vanished.
“Gladly, sir. Your care in choosing a room with the perfect view for me at Pemberley surely compensates for your refusal to dance with me the first time we met, even more so as it eventually happened the second time.”
“I am grateful for your generosity. But our dance together occurred the third time I asked. You refused me twice: at Sir William’s party and one evening at Netherfield,” he replied teasingly.
It was Elizabeth’s turn to remain silent in astonishment.
“Is there another story I should know about?” the countess inquired. Georgiana chuckled while Darcy hurried to deny it with a firm shake of his head.
When the conversation on that subject seemed finally ended, the colonel turned to Darcy and said with apparent secrecy.
“Cousin, once we arrive at Pemberley, remind me to explain to you that dancing with a lovely lady at a ball alleviates distress and does not increase it. I wish I had taught it to you years ago so you could have avoided such awkward moments as you just related. But it is never too late to improve one’s knowledge and manners on the subject. ”