46. FORTY-SIX
FORTY-SIX
Mina
The knots in each muscle were abused until they released their hold on me. I tried almost all the treatments that Aziza recommended for my skin type and hair. The most potent balm is how much this place feels like back home.
Every inch of me is polished and pampered, oiled and moisturized, even more so than my wedding day. Everyone else shares the same glow.
“I never want to leave,” Victoria says with a sigh.
Months of tension melt away in the steaming water.
The cave is dimly lit by lanterns, and guards stand at even intervals around the cavernous space.
We all sit naked in the grotto, milky water up to our shoulders.
I expected Lady Elena to protest, but apparently group baths are common in the west among women.
I splash warm water on the back of my neck, my contented sigh echoed by the others.
“Truly, thank the emperor for us.” Kailani sinks further into the grotto. “If we hadn’t already joined Veloria, this might be enough to convince me.”
My laugh bounces off the natural stone. I let my hair fan out around me, soaking up the minerals. I long to bring my sisters here, but the ache of grief is overshadowed by the smiles around me.
A new sisterhood has been forged, one that has even lowered Elena’s walls. Tomorrow might bring back the same old dynamics, but in this grotto, we are one. Even the conversation flows more freely than titles usually allow.
“Are you certain you two aren’t fighting?” Elena probes, lacking her usual bite.
Jaime groans and fans herself through the steam. We went through this already in the mud room, but Elena is still convinced Darius’s gift is compensating for something.
“Darius is not a man who beats around the bush. If we were fighting, I’d know about it.”
“As would we,” Kailani jokes, earning a few laughs.
Victoria lightly splashes Elena, earning a warning glare. “This tour has hardly been free of stress, and I for one believe that he simply wants to do something nice for the woman he loves. We’ve seen the way he looks at you, Mina. Only you.”
The woman he loves. My cheeks heat at the thought.
Elena turns to Tayla, determined to be right. “Surely you know. Is this odd behavior for the emperor or not?”
Her bark of a laugh echoes. “Anything romantic from Darius Gilchrist is a little odd, but not a bad thing.” She turns to me with a knowing smile. “Men in love change. I’ve never seen him like this with anyone but you. Trust that difference.”
I blush under her praise, knowing he’s not the only one who has changed. I love my family and Kalisham, but I never quite felt like I fully belonged anywhere until meeting Darius.
Falling for him was like falling into the best version of myself. Strong alone, but better together.
Veloria was foreign and terrifying, yet it’s become a second home. That has everything to do with the people in this room as well.
“I promise to ask him tonight. If anything, just to ease Elena’s worries,” I say.
“You can’t just come out and ask a man and expect an honest answer.” Elena presses her fingers to her head as if scolding a child.
“How should I broach the subject then? Spell it out in a letter?” Sarcasm drips from the suggestion, yet each of the women ponders her answers. For goodness’ sake, how did we end up on this subject again?
“As a wife you do have one weapon at your disposal.” Tayla smirks at me.
I groan into my hands. My sex life is not up for discussion.
“Pleasure is not a weapon and should never be withheld for such petty reasons,” I scold.
Jaime surprises me by speaking up. She’s usually content to observe when the others are around, waiting to give her opinion in private. Humor laces her suggestive tone. “I don’t think she’s suggesting you withhold.”
They want me to seduce the answer out of him? Not a bad idea considering how much we enjoy that aspect of our relationship. He might even enjoy the challenge if I tell him my goal is to make him talk.
“That’s the secret to your happy marriage then?” I ask.
Tayla’s humor relaxes into a peaceful smile. “One of them. Open communication, patience, and choice are the others.”
“Choice?” Victoria asks, her gaze dancing toward Kailani for the briefest of moments.
Tayla nods. “People are constantly growing and changing, usually for the better, but we all make mistakes. Most days, loving someone is as easy as breathing. Other days it takes a conscious effort not to strangle them over their work schedule.”
Our quick laughter dies out as we hang on her every word. I can see why Staefan fell for her grace and charm.
Tayla continues, “Choosing to love despite the difficult, through sickness and trials and loss—that’s the secret to a long and happy marriage.”
Darius and I will face nothing but hardships with our plan for Kalisham. I’ve been anxious about what happens after we succeed, but Tayla’s advice makes it all so simple.
I’m allowed to choose Darius. Choose this life. I just have to decide if that’s what I want.
Tayla flashes another knowing smile at me, and my cheeks warm. I nod my thanks.
“That’s beautiful,” Kailani says. “I hope we all find such a love one day.”
Our dreamy atmosphere is broken by the doors at the front of the grotto opening. Our assigned attendants stand ready with fluffy, dry towels. Our guards step forward to search each of them before we step out of the water.
My pruned fingers signal how long we were soaking. My stomach growls softly despite the butterflies of my earlier thoughts. The snacks here are delicious, but hardly filling enough to supplement my training. Thank goodness dinner is soon.
As we towel off and dress, I take in these strong women. My chest tightens when I realize I might not see any of them again should my return to Kalisham end badly. Darius isn’t the only love I’d be choosing by returning to Veloria.
I thank the attendants and ask them to give us a moment alone.
Easy smiles meet my own. “Thank you all for today. For everything. I would be worse off without your guidance and friendships.”
I hug each of them in turn, kissing their cheeks. Hopefully, more happy memories are in our future. One where they come for a day of pampering at my palace.
“If there is anything you ever need, I hope you rely on me. For as long as I’m queen, I will do everything in my power to ensure your happiness.”
“You’ve already done so much. We’re just happy to be at your side.” Victoria loops her arm through mine. “But I wouldn’t be opposed to a yearly visit here.”
“I think that can be arranged.” Their laughter fills the cracks of my broken heart. Tears threaten, but I push them back, not wanting to ruin a joyous day. Jaime flashes me a knowing smile, squeezing my hand before going ahead to join the others.
A whisper of wind tickles my arms despite us being in a windowless cave. I smile at the soothing tug in my chest. My family is with me, blessing the relationships I have forged here and easing my guilt.
I will have my revenge, but I can also have this. Companionship. Fun. Love.
I deserve to be happy and to live my life to the fullest once my revenge is complete. I’ll appreciate each second of each day to honor their memory, so that when we reunite among the stars, they will be proud.