Chapter 13 #2
Unsurprisingly we hadn't made love since Christmas, and the thought crossed my mind more times than I cared to admit whether he was getting his needs met elsewhere.
Alessio was a very sexual man who wasn't used to going without.
Yes, he'd promised not to take another mistress, but that statement was made when there was a potential marriage to fix.
Now, I just couldn't see a way back to a reconciliation. Alessio would never love me, and while I could pretend that what we had was enough, the blinders were lifted, and it was too late to go back.
Although his indiscretion with Annabelle had hurt me, my growing jealousy and resentment would've festered over time, and our marriage would have eventually split wide open.
My plan to separate from Alessio in the New Year took a pause as I immersed myself back into uni life.
Truthfully, I welcomed the heavy workload.
The severing of our union needed a team of lawyers to dismantle.
I also had to speak with my father regarding the stipulations of his business merger; something I had been dreading, knowing he wouldn't be happy that his legacy was in jeopardy.
Who cares about his daughter's happiness when his hard work would soon be a footnote in the history of another family's name?
Aside from the legalities of our divorce, the other stumbling block was my missing husband.
Alessio had dropped all pretence of playing devoted spouse and had started spending all his time in the office or travelling.
If he carried on any longer, I would have to phone Brad to enter me into his diary.
A divorce serving before his morning briefing, perhaps? That was sure to get his attention,
It was early February when a surprise visitor came to our door. Alessio was still at work, or so I assumed.
"Cesare!" I said, once I got over my surprise. "Hello. How are you?" I leaned over and kissed Alessio's father on each cheek. "I'm afraid Alessio isn't in this evening. He has another late night at the office." I tried to keep the bitterness out of my voice.
He nodded, his face friendly yet serious. "Yes, I've just come from his office. I actually came to see you. We haven't seen much of you since Christmas, and I wanted to catch up."
I reared my head back, stunned. "Oh."
I wasn't opposed to his visit, but Cesare and I didn't have a catch-up kind of relationship. The total extent of my conversations with him was polite small talk in the presence of Alessio and his family. I couldn't recall ever being alone with him.
"Unless…you are busy? I apologise, I know I have come over unannounced."
"Oh, no! No, I'm not busy at all. I was reviewing my revision notes. Please, come in."
I stepped back and took his coat from him, placing it in our cloakroom.
I showed him to our lounge, where I'd set up a study corner and had been poring over textbooks and notes.
As awkward as it was to see Cesare, I welcomed the distraction.
My mind had been reading the same lines over and over, with nothing sinking in.
"I've just called for some tea. Or do you prefer coffee?"
He sat down opposite me. "No, no. Tea is fine. I've spent so much time in England that I've grown fond of the stuff. Katherine prefers I drink it, although it's the green stuff she tries to force down my throat."
I laughed softly, thanking Rose as she came in, carrying a silver tray with a pot and two teacups.
I dismissed her and poured the tea for both of us before placing the saucer on the side table by his chair. I also gave him a couple of chocolate digestive biscuits that Rose had thoughtfully included.
"I won't tell Katherine if you won't." I winked.
"You're too good to me," he approved with a laugh, patting his flat stomach.
"How is Katherine? And Dante? Did she mention to you that Dante is welcome to visit for the summer here or in Devon? With you and Katherine, of course." I didn't want to mention that I wouldn't likely be in attendance, though it pained me that I might never see his side of the family again.
"Yes. And thank you, I think we'd enjoy a nice English summer."
I nodded my approval and took a sip of my tea in the interim silence. Despite my initial awkwardness, I slowly began to relax in his presence.
Finally, after Cesare had almost finished his tea, he placed his saucer down and gestured to my open textbooks. "How are your studies going? I have asked Alessio, but he has been very tight-lipped about it."
I gave a small snort. "Tight-lipped because he probably doesn't know what I'm studying." The bitter comment came out before I could think, and my startled gaze rose to meet his. Embarrassment spilt onto my cheeks. "I-I mean—"
"It's quite all right, Millie. I know what you mean.
" His voice was amused and not at all offended.
"However, if you think Alessio is ignorant of your achievements, you couldn't be further from the truth," he said.
"My son is very proud of you. Yes, he is very stingy when it comes to sharing you, but that is part of our burden to bear. "
My brow furrowed, unable to comprehend what he was saying. "I'm sorry? Burden?"
His knowing smile unnerved me. "The burden of possessive men in love. We don't want to share our spouse with anyone. Their thoughts, hobbies and time are closely guarded."
A bubble of laughter came over me before I could silence it. My, Cesare sounded positively romantic. Any notion that the love Katherine felt for him was one-sided couldn't be more false. It was clear as the tip of my nose that he reciprocated her devotion.
Unfortunately, an old fool in love tended to view all relationships through rose-coloured glasses.
The last thing Alessio felt for me was possessive love.
Oh, he viewed me as a possession, alright.
Like a child who jealously guarded their toy.
They may get bored and forget about it, but as soon as someone showed an interest, they suddenly wished to hoard it for themselves.
"Yes…well. That's one way of looking at it," I diplomatically answered. If he wanted to pretend Alessio and I had a solid marriage, then there was no harm in humouring him.
I watched in silence as he picked up a biscuit and took a polite bite.
He made a small sound of appreciation before devouring the rest and taking another sip of his tea to wash it down.
He caught me looking, and he ducked his head bashfully.
"Katherine rarely keeps sweets in the house.
Something about managing my blood sugars or cholesterol.
" He shrugged. "Or some other nonsense. But I don't mind.
Happy wife, happy long life, am I right? "
My gaze scoured over Cesare. I took in his relaxed face, his shoulders that weren't tensely held, the deep lines around his eyes and mouth that came from a life full of laughter. An ugly pulse kicked me low in my stomach, and I realised that I was jealous of a middle-aged man and his relationship.
"Marriage in our world is hard, isn't it?" Cesare sat back in his chair, his hands resting on the arms as he eyed me with a knowing look that stripped my vulnerabilities.
I shrugged, my gaze evading his, smoothly sidestepping his question. "We're very privileged. I have no right to complain."
"Ah." He nodded. "We are very lucky. But just because we're rich, it doesn't mean that we do not have the same desires in a marriage as everyone else.
With Alessio's mother, for example, we entered into a union much like the two of you.
" His mouth twisted as his mind was cast back to the past. "On my wedding day, I had this romantic fantasy of the two of us making a real go at our marriage and possibly falling in love.
" His eyes lit up in amusement. "Boy, was I wrong. "
My brow furrowed as confusion set in. "I'm sorry, Cesare, but I'm afraid you've lost me."
He hummed, his aged fingers tapping along the upholstery. "I love my son, Millie. Despite what he may think, he's my pride and joy. So when I see him hurt, it hurts me too. Especially when he refuses to give me the time of day outside of discussing business."
I sat up straight, my teacup clattering noisily as I placed it back onto the saucer. "Alessio is hurt? What's happened? Is-is it work? Are things not going well?"
He shook his head, his gaze thoughtful on me. "Millie. Not to be blunt, but Alessio doesn't give two shits about work right now."
My mouth dropped open at his bluntness.
"I know he's in a quarrel with you. He gets like this anytime trouble pops up in your marriage.
He's moody and depressed. He works his staff ten times harder.
" He gestured wildly, concern clearly etched on his face.
"His personal secretary has been threatening to quit, and just today I caught him drinking on the job. "
He shot me a sharp look that surely wasn't meant to be accusatory but felt heaped in judgement.
"Alessio never drinks on the job. He has a fully stocked bar for his business associates, which is the only time he indulges while at his office.
So tell me why I just caught him knocking back two shots of whisky at midday. "
I spluttered. "I…well, maybe he's had a rough day—"
"We went through a gruelling takeover last year.
We were in a bidding war, and it came right down to the wire.
We could have lost millions of dollars, but Alessio kept a cool head the whole time.
" He paused, letting his words wash over me.
“But I have a feeling that Alessio wouldn't be so level-headed if he lost you. "
My throat bobbed, and I stared at my almost-empty cup, suddenly wishing for something stronger. "Forgive my candour, but you are a romantic old fool."
He took no offence, grinning widely. "Perhaps!"