Chapter Thirty Maya
Chapter Thirty
Maya
I handed Emily a glass of wine and gripped my Sam Adams, taking a seat next to her on our couch. “Cheers to girls’ night.”
“Cheers, babe.”
Once we’d clinked, I took a long sip of the cold beer. “I feel like this is so overdue.” I rested my head on her shoulder. “I know I see you every day, but I still miss you. And I feel like I’ve said that to you more than once since I started dating Jordan—but each time, I mean it more and more.”
“Life is getting busy. But you know what? I’m so down for everything that’s happening for you.” She rubbed the top of my head right before I lifted it to look at her. “Besides, I can always hang with Bettie when you’re not around.” She winked.
I laughed. “She’s more fun than me.”
“She isn’t. But she’s just as fabulous.” She tucked a pillow against her chest. “I want to ask you something. A serious something.”
“Okay.”
“Being the observant bee that I am and picking up on some of the things you’ve said, I take it that Jordan’s job requires a decent amount of traveling.”
I couldn’t imagine where this conversation was headed and how that question could lead to something serious, but I nodded and said, “It does. I don’t know how much, exactly.
I do know he often goes to the Bears’ away games and meets with sponsors.
Now that they bought the Clovers, I’m sure he’ll be traveling with them as well. ”
She folded her legs beneath her. “Hypothetically speaking, of course, what happens if he wants you to start traveling with him?”
“It’s not hypothetical. He’s asked me to travel.”
“I love that man.” She held her wine not far from her mouth.
“Okay, let’s break this down for a second.
You get two weeks of vacay. You’re taking one of those weeks in just a couple of days when Jordan whisks you away, which leaves you only one more week and another week of combined personal and sick time. ”
“It’s not a lot of time off, I know, Em.”
“Do you know how many away games the Bears have? And the Clovers?”
I shook my head.
“A ton,” she said. “I looked up the remainder of both schedules.”
I rubbed the mouth of the bottle around my lips. “I guess I’ll just have to . . . Shit, I don’t know what I’ll do.”
“Have you thought about it?”
“Since the Clover buyout, he’s been working a lot more, which has given me extra time to think. But honestly, what can I do? It’s not like I can do my job remotely.”
“Would you ever consider giving it up to be more flexible? That way you can go on the road with him and you guys won’t have to be apart.”
A rush of anxiety raced through me, and as I tried to breathe past it, the tightness settled in my chest.
And depend solely on Jordan? And not contribute at all? Something my mother had dreamed of and could never make happen. But I wasn’t her. I didn’t have those dreams. Money was such a hot button for me, and I’d worked my ass off for what I had. How could I just . . . walk away from it all?
Which was why I replied, “No.”
“Not even if you were pregnant?”
My hand flew to my chest. “Which I’m not and I’m not ready to be. Let’s not let the universe hear that word and somehow use its power to pop out my IUD. I’d like a few things to happen before a baby comes into our lives.”
“But Maya, you want to be a mother. And Jordan wants to be a father. The two of you are going to make babies.” She smiled. “So at some point, it’s going to happen.”
I sipped my beer. “At some point, yes.”
“And even then, you’re not going to give up nursing?”
I rocked back into the corner of our couch. “Em, nursing is who I am.”
“I knew you were going to say that. That’s why I asked you.
” She brushed away the strands of hair by my face with her fingers.
“Nursing isn’t your identity, Maya, even if you think it is.
That’s why I want you to consider other options.
I know Jordan hasn’t asked you to quit your job, but say he begs you to be on the road with him.
You can’t go. And then he’s gone two weeks out of the month, month after month.
Think of how tough that would be on your relationship. ”
“That’s one way to look at it—and yes, it would be miserable. But is it fair for me to give up something I love? To support him so he can do something he loves? Where’s the compromise?”
She sat up straight and shook her shoulders with complete confidence. “I’m so glad you asked. Because I have one. Your girl came prepared for this convo because I had a feeling this was something you hadn’t considered.”
I laughed. “Not at all surprised that you’re solving all my life issues, and I love you even harder for that.”
She clinked her glass against mine again.
“With this option, you get to stay in nursing. You can even stay at the rehab center and see my beautiful face.” She winked.
“But instead of being a full-time employee, you work per diem. If you’re home for two weeks, work the two weeks.
If you’re home the whole month, work the whole month.
But by going from full-time to per diem, you’ll be able to travel as much as you want and still have a job to come home to.
Heck, with the rates they pay those types of employees, there’s a chance you’ll make even more money than you do now. ”
Emily was right; this was an option I hadn’t even thought of. I would certainly be able to come and go as I wanted. And I would potentially make more money.
Of course, there were downfalls.
Major ones.
And one was: “But I wouldn’t have any benefits.”
She snorted. “You think Jordan is going to let you go without insurance?”
My cheeks puffed as I blew out air. “That still means I would have to rely on him.”
“Babe, if that man is going to become your husband one day, then you will be relying on him just like he’s going to be relying on you.
” She reached for my hand. “I know you’re used to doing everything on your own, but you don’t have to anymore.
That’s what relationships are all about—not all, I suppose, but yours is.
” She clenched my fingers. “And think about it—if you move in with Jordan, you won’t have rent or utilities, which is going to save you a boatload.
All you’ll really have is your cell phone and student loans.
I’m not saying those bills are nothing, but in comparison to what you’re currently paying, they’re kinda nothing.
One day of per diem, and you’ll have both of those bills covered for the entire month. ”
I let her idea sink in.
I definitely didn’t want his traveling to come between us, for us to grow apart, or for this to start feeling like a long-distance relationship.
And with what they would be paying me, there was a good chance I could afford my own insurance. I could even help contribute to Jordan’s bills—if he’d let me. I couldn’t even imagine what a mortgage would be on a home like his.
Or the electricity.
Or even the water.
She shook my hand. “I can see those little wheels spinning in your brain.” She paused. “Come on, you know I came up with the best solution ever.” She unfolded her legs and stretched them out across the ottoman. “I’m a genius, aren’t I?”
I laughed. “I’ll give it to you . . . your idea is impressive.”
She released my hand but held my arm. “Do you feel better about the possibilities now?”
“I do.”
“Good.” She drank her wine. “Now, let’s talk about that upcoming vacay Jordan is taking you on. Do you have any deets? I’m dying to know everything.”
“Um. That makes two of us.” I wiggled onto my knees and sat on my calves. “He won’t tell me anything. The only reason he even told me about the vacation was because I needed to take the time off work.”
She wagged her finger at me. “Another reason per diem is perfect for you.”
“Anywaaay,” I sang, “I know we leave in three days. That’s all the information he’s given me.”
“Oh God, how are you supposed to pack?”
I shrugged. “I don’t know.”
“Is he going to tell you the night before so you can at least put together your suitcase?”
I put my hand out, palm-side up. “I have no idea.”
“I can’t handle this.”
“Same!” I exhaled. “He’s leaving tomorrow, and he won’t be coming back until our trip—I think. He won’t even confirm those details. I just know he needs to travel to New York. Whether he’s meeting me here or there—wherever there is—I’m clueless.”
“That man is killing me.”
“You? What about me!”
“The thing is, you know his assistant has planned out every step of this trip and he’s just not telling you because he wants to see or hear your reaction, like when you walked into his condo and it was covered in flowers.
He lives for surprises. Meanwhile, we’re sharpening our knives over here so we can threaten his life. ”
I giggled. “But you know what, I love that about him.”
“Me too.”
I went quiet for a moment. “Em . . .”
“Yeah?”
“I’m ready for it to be your turn. For you to find a Jordan.”
“Girl, you and me both.”
Me: I miss you. How’s NY?
Jordan: Fucking awful without you. Next time, you’re coming with me.
Me: I would love that.
Jordan: Two days until I get to hold you. That feels like a goddamn eternity.
Me: Speaking of that . . . what kind of weather will it be outside when you’re holding me?
Jordan: I see what you just did there.
Me: Jordan, I need to know these kinda things. You won’t give me anything . . .
Jordan: And I don’t plan to.
Jordan: Good morning, gorgeous. One more night until I’m holding you.
Me: You mean, until I’m strangling you. I say that with love, just so you know. Even though Emily and I have already planned out your death.
Jordan: Lol. Feeling a little spicy over the unknown?
Me: How’s a girl supposed to plan for a trip when she doesn’t know where she’s going?
Jordan: But that’s part of the surprise, Maya.
Me: I have no idea what that means.
Jordan: You will, baby. Soon.