Chapter Five #2
Thus far, though, they hadn’t done anything except kiss.
“No, I’m not ashamed.” Perplexed and confused, definitely, but not ashamed.
It was odd, this excitement being around him, but he did add zest and well, life to her existence where before, all she had was mourning and the loneliness that bedeviled her in the dark of night.
Slowly, she smiled. “However, I should remind you that you promised we would have a reprise of kissing and…”
“…fondling?” he asked in a whisper with a grin and wicked promise in his eyes. “Or, if there is an opportunity, to send you flying?”
Was that even possible? When she and Samuel had come together, she’d reached that state a couple of times, but mostly, that magic had been unattainable.
“Yes.” As her cheeks burned once more, she tugged her hands from his.
“I’m afraid I’m not talented or even knowledgeable about how to be a mistress. ”
“There is no set way, and we’ve barely undertaken the relationship.
” He took one of her hands, threaded it through his crooked elbow, then led her across the room toward the door.
“Trust me, we will do all of what you’ve mentioned, but the weather is fine just now and we shouldn’t waste it.
Soon enough, the rain and gloom will return. ”
That was a certainty since it was London. “Well, I…”
“And you are already dressed, so why not?” When he gazed down at her and met her gaze, the dark hunger shadowing his eyes echoed deep within her to awaken her own. “That navy gown is stunning on you.”
“It’s not too much to go driving?”
“Hardly. When we’re out, observe some of the other women. What you are wearing is quite tame.”
Was that a bad thing? Should she have her new gowns cut with a lower bodice? “I’ll remember to do that.”
“Once again, I rented a curricle, so everyone on Rotten Row will see us, or rather you. That thrills me because you are a classic, understated beauty.” Before she could protest, he whisked her out of the drawing room and then down the stairs.
“But everyone there will know why we’re driving.” That didn’t cheer her. When she agreed to be his mistress, she didn’t realize he’d want to show her off so frequently.
“Oh, yes.” As he waggled his eyebrows, a grudging chuckle escaped her. “Especially after everyone saw us doing exactly that two days ago.” Dipping his head, he put his lips to the shell of her ear. “Are you afraid of the gossip or the outing?”
“Neither.” At least that was the truth. “It’s more of an adventure, I think.” Unless she had an attack in that very public setting. That would embarrass them both and work to further shred her reputation.
Concern creased his brow. “If you are concerned or believe this is moving too quickly, we can stay here.”
“No.” She squeezed her fingers upon his arm but appreciated his caring. “Let us go driving. It will help me to move about society with a freedom I’ve not had before. It has the potential to prove amazing.”
His grin was slightly crooked, and she rather liked it. “I’m glad you think so.”
Slowly, her mood was lifting, and her usual heavy anxiety had receded. “I do, and if you can introduce me to eligible men you know, I’d enjoy that too.”
“Why?” A certain wariness had crept into his tone.
Constance shrugged. “As I told you when we first agreed to this, I wish to marry again. Since you and I are only together for scandal—”
“And companionship,” he was quick to add as they gained the entry hall.
“There is that,” she agreed with a nod. “It wouldn’t hurt to cast out a net, hmm?”
“Perhaps not, and it’s only fair since I’ll do the same if my wishes are ignored by my parents.” Yet his teasing grin had all but disappeared, and the wicked twinkle had dimmed in his eyes.
It wasn’t until they were halfway through the drive that they spoke of something that had nothing to do with pleasantries or gossip about the people they’d encountered.
“What sort of man do you hope to marry this time ‘round?” Gregory asked as he concentrated on the reins.
She fixed her gaze on his gloved hands, impressed at how well the matched grays responded to his slightest movement. “To be honest, I don’t want another military man. It left a sour taste in my mouth when Samuel went away for that last mission.”
“Fair enough.”
“And I have always thought that a man with a healthy sense of humor would be lovely to have about one’s life.
There’s something about laughing that strengthens a bond.
” As she spoke, she clasped her fingers tightly in her lap.
“It would be crass to say that I want a man who is already settled in his life, for struggling to survive has a tendency to chip away at romance.”
“I can understand that.” Then he glanced at her. “What about looks or carnal skill?”
“It wouldn’t matter if he wasn’t a good lover. If he had other favorable qualities, we would live a lovely life and rub along well together.” When she met his gaze, confusion shadowed his stormy depths. “Don’t you think life is simple once you think of what’s truly important?”
“Perhaps, but to have lackluster intercourse for the remainder of your life? Wouldn’t that prove dull after too long?
” He guided the curricle off the wide avenue and public road.
As they rattled along a smaller, grooved path toward a wooden bridge in a heavily wooded area near Hyde Park, he added, “There is no reason you can’t have both, by the by. ”
“In a perfect world, perhaps, but trying to find all those attributes is already going to prove challenging.”
“What about a man with a title or a fortune?”
“That isn’t necessary; I just don’t want to struggle.
” A sigh escaped her. “All my life, before Samuel came along, my mother and father constantly counted their coin. Lower middle class was nothing to sneeze at, of course, but it was nothing to brag about. It wore on their relationship, and that made me sad.”
“Is that where your attacks stem from? The worry about survival?”
She shivered as they went beneath the bridge and into the shadows therein. Surprise moved through her chest when he stopped the curricle and threw the hand brake. “I never thought about it in those terms, but perhaps. I was a worrier. Still am.”
“That is merely due to the fact that you haven’t been properly stimulated or given anything exciting to ponder.” Seconds later, he tugged her into his arms and claimed her lips with his in a kiss she swore would sear across her brain.
Immediately, her body responded to his overture.
She slipped her hands up his chest, beneath his lapels to explore the breadth of his shoulders.
How could she give thought regarding the potential for gossip since anyone could come upon them while Gregory was whisking her away to dance amidst the heights merely with a series of deep, drugging kisses?
Dear God, he was skilled in kissing.
It was all Constance could do to follow his lead.
How did he like the women he was with to respond?
Did he want shy and retiring, or did he prefer bold and assertive?
In the end, it didn’t matter, since she was neither of those types.
She returned the embrace the best she knew how, learning all the while, for he had more talent for this than Samuel had.
Little by little, they pulled each other closer.
Their knees knocked together, but that didn’t deter him.
When his hands went to cup her breasts, he dipped his head to press his lips to the side of her neck.
With a sigh, she lifted her chin to allow him greater access.
With a few determined yanks, he had the strings undone that kept her spencer closed.
Seconds later, he wrenched off his gloves.
They fell to the floorboards, but neither of them cared.
As he traced her skin along the edge of the bodice, tingles zipped up and down her spine.
Despite herself, a soft moan left her throat.
With a hand, she pressed his to one of her breasts.
Thank goodness he was a clever man, for he dipped that hand inside her bodice, and when he freed the breast from the fabric, she nearly launched off the bench when he took the rigid nipple into his mouth.
There was something quite exciting and illicit in letting him not only do this scandalous thing but to do it out in the open. It was neither proper nor right, but oh, it felt so good!
Over and over he alternately suckled that nipple or flicked it with the tip of his tongue.
As her breath came in fast pants, her fingers scrabbled over his shoulders, his lapels, his cravat while she blindly sought something to do with her hands.
The last thing she wanted was for him to think she wasn’t a willing participant in her own ruination from polite society.
With the last bit of clear thinking, Constance dared to slide a hand down his torso then between his thighs.
Did it matter that her hand shook as she traced her fingertips along his engorged length covered by the fabric of his breeches?
She hoped not, and when a soft, guttural groan left his throat, she smiled, and it was her turn to initiate a kiss.
There was so much heat behind that one meeting of mouths that she was surprised they didn’t burn that bridge down around their ears. Eventually, she wrenched away merely to breathe, but she held his gaze and grinned, probably like a ninny, but she was beyond caring.
“Careful, Mr. Hamilton, else I’ll grow quite accustomed to such scandal.”
“That is the point, Mrs. Knight.” Then he winked.
“Perhaps it is.” Suddenly self-conscious, she set her clothing to rights. “What now?”
He disengaged the hand brake and took up the reins once more. “Are you engaged for dinner tonight?”
“I am not. My father is dining with friends. I had planned to play fetch with Isabella.”
“An evening with your cat.” It wasn’t a question.
“Yes.”
“Well, we can’t have that. It is much too dull after what just happened.” They both shared a laugh. “You are coming home with me for dinner. And you can tell me about your cat.”
How long had it been since she’d had something to look forward to? “I would like that.”
Oh, he would be trouble, but she intended to enjoy this bit of scandal for as long as he could. This might not be what Lydia had in mind when she told Constance to get out and live again, but she was past caring.
This was exactly what she needed.
For now.