6. James
JAMES
S he was pretty as a bell, sitting there sipping on her coffee. And an enigma.
The direct opposite of what I’d made her up to be in my mind.
When Alan told me he’d hired someone for the position, I was pissed. Not that he wasn’t within his rights, but I wanted to have a say.
I was used to having a say, controlling my environment—as much as I could.
I’d decided before I ever met her to give her a hard time. To see if she was really worth her salt.
And look at me now.
Somehow, Erin Roberts was the most intriguing woman I’d ever met. Who would move with only a suitcase, a backpack, and a purse?
She said she lost everything in a fire. But there was more to it.
Something in the way the light in her eyes dimmed when she mentioned it.
Something she wasn’t telling, and it sparked an interest and a protectiveness in me, unlike anything I’d ever experienced. Maybe I should look at her file. I’d hired someone to look into her past. The cliff notes stated she’d come out clean, so I didn’t check the details. Maybe I should.
But then again. Maybe I shouldn’t.
I watched her eat pancakes, and charm the girls,
She smiled at Abby and gave Marley the head and horn part of a pancake of her own stack when Marley wanted more.
W hen all three of them were finished, they relocated to the living room where she admired everything starting from their hairdos, and ending at the homemade decorations on our Christmas tree.
She appeared genuinely friendly and happy interacting with the girls. And when they started playing right there on the floor a weight settled in my chest.
The girls needed a mother. Needed a female role model, they could look up to and tell their secrets to. My mother was there for them, but she would forever be Grammy.
I tried to be both parents to them. But did I always manage? Did I give them everything they needed? Everything they would get if they had two parents?
I truly didn’t know.
And it was getting harder.
And lonelier.
The door opened, and my mother came in without warning. “Girls, are you ready? Time to go.”
I could’ve taken them to preschool. But my mother and I had a standing appointment, so I didn’t even think about it.
“I—”
She stopped in surprise at the bar when she saw Erin and the twins in the living room.
Took her time to take them in before she looked back at me.
“Mom, meet Erin. She’s the new nurse practitioner and midwife Alan hired.”
Erin’s head snapped up and her eyes grew big.
My mother regained her composure—not without a raised eyebrow in my direction.
Erin got up in record time, came over with the twins in tow, and shook hands with my mother.
“So nice to meet you. I’m Marge,” my mother said.
“Erin. Nice to meet you, as well,” Erin said while a slight red tinged her cheeks. She was still only wearing my T-shirt. A fact that my mother didn’t miss but thankfully didn’t comment on either.
A fact that I enjoyed way more than I should have.
“Erin had an accident yesterday. And talk about accident.” I looked at my watch. “We should probably check in with the vet soon.”
Erin nodded, and my mother nodded, too.
“Abby, Marley, are you ready to leave?” she asked the twins.
They both turned to Erin, and tugged at her hands until she leaned down.
Then, both simultaneously gave her a syrupy kiss on the cheek, which made her laugh and wipe at her skin.
The twins approached me, and I wet a paper towel. I cleaned them up, took their aprons and hats, collected my kisses, and then they were out the door.
Silence stretched between us.
“You have great kids,” she finally said, started stacking the dishes, and brought them over to the sink.
“Thank you,” I said, my eyes never leaving her.
She stopped when she saw a picture of the twins and me on one of the cupboards.
“Jessie told me you’re a single dad….” She fizzled out.
I usually didn’t talk about my family with strangers. Don’t get me wrong. Everyone around here knew about my situation, so I wasn’t really surprised that she knew. But somehow, I would’ve preferred to spin my own story.
At least to her.
“Their mother left.”
Her eyebrows shot up in shock. “Left? As in, not dead?”
Why would she think Trish was dead? “Yep.”
“Why?”
She settled her ass against the counter and crossed her arms in front of her chest. The movement stretched the shirt over her breasts and pushed them up, and her delicious curves made her look feminine and sexy.
For a moment, I forgot the question, forgot everything. Every single fiber in my body wanted to bridge the gap between us, hike her into my arms, settle her on the counter, step between her thighs, and feel those curves pressed against me.
“James?”
“Yes?”
“I’m sorry for being nosey. I didn’t…”
I shook my head. My hands clamped the counter behind my back.
She thought I was hung up on my ex, when I was fantasizing about devouring her for breakfast.
“Do you still have contact?”
I shook my head.
I’d hired a PI to do regular check-ins. Regular reports. But I never inquired about her. And the girls couldn’t even remember her. So…
“I’m sorry. It must be hard to do it all alone.”
I shrugged. I was used to it by now. “What about you?”
“Me?” She looked panicked.
“Don’t you have anyone in your life?”
She shook her head, and the sadness in her eyes nearly broke me. “No. I’m all alone.”
And her loneliness was palpable.
I almost opened my arms again. Almost offered another hug. Would she be okay with it?
Would she want what I had to offer?
Instead, I gave her upper arm a squeeze before turning and filling the dishwasher.