Chapter 17
No Breaks to be Caught
Lillian
WE SAW THEM through a cracked pair of binoculars.
Twenty-seven of them.
All that’s left of the 100-strong force of Germans.
Ben says that since we can see them, we should expect that they can see us.
The only way to the colony from here is a cave through the base of one of the surrounding mountains, just as the journal told us.
He and James believe that we should make the push first, but with many of Bruno’s men injured and terrified, there are still arguments being had.
The more time we waste here, the greater the fear that the Germans could overtake us and make the final effort to the Col?nia Perdida. Our only chance at that point would be to face them before they reach their destination. A confrontation that would most likely be taken care of with bullets.
I can hear their squabbling, the way they talk about me as if I were not here. As if I couldn’t give any insight into what I saw or what that conquistador had told me.
They’ve been arguing about the purpose of it all, if it was even worth it anymore. Mr. Bennett has hardly had a word to say. Even now, he won’t fully give over the true intentions of the British government.
Sighing, I grab my pack from the ground beside me. My movement alerts Margaret who ceases picking the mud from underneath her nails.
“Where are you going?” she asks, just loud enough for everyone to hear.
The arguing stops, and all eyes turn to us. I have no care for anyone’s opinion save for one. Ben catches my eye as I voice my opinion. I’ve been quiet for far too long. From here on out, I am taking control.
“I’m going,” I say with a slight venomous bite in my tone. “I don’t want to waste any more time.”
Fear flashes across Ben’s face, and Bruno raises his anguished eyes for the first time since the mudslide.
“There’s no way that the Germans will continue tonight,” Mr. Bennett growls, throwing a finger toward the small dot of fire. “They’re decimated. We need to camp here and go back around the way we came.”
“You don’t understand!” I catch myself with my raised voice. “That mudslide wasn’t an accident or some divine intervention. That was the earth telling us that it doesn’t want us here. The longer we stay, the angrier this place is going to get. We need to go the way it intends for us to go.”
Mr. Bennett snorts. “Perhaps you can give us a warning the next time something’s about to happen.”
Frustrated, I step forward to meet the barrel-chested man head on. “I’ve tried since the beginning. You haven’t listened, and you still aren’t!”
“What if they do go?” Oliver asks, relieving himself from his position looking out over the German camp. “I don’t know what we just witnessed, or what kind of spiritual work has been going on but whatever it is…” He pauses to lick his lips. “Evil cannot take this power into its hands.”
I nod in agreement, thankful that someone has agreed with me. I’m surprised Oliver is the one to find his voice instead of Ademir or Bruno or even Margaret, but I’m thankful.
Margaret steps up next. “If Lillian says we keep going, then we keep going.” She says it as if any other form of action is out of the question.
“I’ve never seen anyone do the things she can do.
Whether she was cursed or blessed, she is the real reason we’re here.
Even if you won’t admit it, she’s the one to lead us. ”
The two of us women link hands, a unified force.
Mr. Bennett’s face turns from acute stubbornness to annoyance, but he gives in anyway. “Let’s get this over with.”
I don’t have the care to tell him that we still have the hardest part of the journey left. The colony should only be a day or two ahead, but who’s to say infiltration and extraction won’t take a week or more? All time we don’t have.
As our dwindling group gathers their things, I find myself listening in on Bruno’s conversation. He’s speaking with his second in command, a man older than both of us. Someone I danced with that night on the riverboat.
“Você deve levar os outros e voltar,” Bruno pleads, shaking the man on the shoulder.
You must take the others and go back.
“N?o!” the man says. “Deixem-me terminar isto para o bem do nosso país, para a honra dos nossos antepassados.”
Let me finish this for the good of our country, for the honor of our ancestors.
My young nervous friend finds the courage to be the leader he’s always been and lifts his chin to give his command again. I hope I inspired him, even if it was just a small bit. “Você levará os outros e voltará,” he says strongly.
You will take the others and go back.
“Volte daqui a uma semana com o barco.”
Return in a week's time with the boat.
Understanding that he still has an important job to do, the older man nods. Turning away from Bruno, I swear I see tears in his eyes, but he doesn’t let the emotion stop him. He throws two bags that survived the onslaught across his shoulders and collects the other men.
“I had to send them back,” Bruno says, sensing my nearness.
I swallow back the pride I have for him and his decision, and then feel the fear of knowing we will be missing their strength. “I know.”
With half our men leaving, we’ll have less protection but will be able to travel faster and with less chance of detection.
Those men will see their families again because of Bruno’s kindness.
I want nothing more than to offer him the same thing, but I find I’m too much of a coward to do so. I can’t do this without him by my side.
When there’s nothing left to say between us, I squeeze the leather strap of my bag and turn back up the hill. A gentle rain has started again, which causes the rocks beneath my feet to grow quite slippery. It’s going to be a long climb.
Ben
Somehow we make it to the top by the early hours of morning. With just two lanterns and a flashlight amongst our group of 8, it was a difficult climb. Even if we had wanted to risk the light being seen by the group behind us, we couldn’t. The mud ate nearly everything we set out with.
Bruno’s men were kind enough to leave us with two parcels of food and some equipment. I admire what Bruno did; his men pleaded to stay with him for Christ’s sake. That’s real leadership. We’ll have to do without their knowledge of the landscape.
Lillian makes a sound of frustration from beside me, and I allow myself a moment’s rest of squinting ahead into the dark.
She’s been trying to get her journal to glow ever since we stopped to rest. I can’t count on my two hands how many times she’s spoken her incantations or squeezed the necklace until it left indents in her hand.
She doesn't want to go through the caves; I suspect no one does. But, it’s the path before us, and I’m going to do my best to get us through.
Lillian groans again and lets her necklace drop to her chest with a thump. “It’s not working.”
I dare to glance at the pages and find the lines in the same place they were earlier.
Through the caves it is. “It’s done its job. It got us this far.”
Reaching an arm around her shoulders, I pull her closer to me.
She instinctively rests a cheek against my chest, surrendering all her troubles.
Reaching an arm around her shoulders, I pull her closer to me.
Having her here in my arms is as calm as I’ll ever be able to be.
She instinctively rests a cheek against my chest, surrendering all her troubles.
When she’s against me, I know I can protect her.
Her right hand snakes around me and hangs off my opposite shoulder.
My heartbeat slows to match her own when I feel it beating against me.
Cradling her in an embrace like this, I can almost picture a future where we make it out of this place and make a life of peace. Almost.
The dream fades at the sound of her exhausted voice. “Can’t we keep going?” she asks through a yawn.
“Rest,” I say through a whisper.
“What about the Germans?” I can hear the fear in her voice, and it breaks me, if there are even any pieces left of me to break after last night.
“I’ve got my eye on them,” I answer, focusing on that little dot of fire below.
I’ve had my attention on them throughout the night. I’ve never once let them escape my view. They’ve made little progress, but I expect by morning light they’ll be rearing to rejoin the chase.
Lillian’s breathing evens out only moments later, signaling that she’s fallen asleep.
I let myself enjoy the peace for one measly needed moment.
Tilting my head to the side, I close my eyes and breathe in the scent of her.
There, beneath the smell of the mud and the rain, I can feel her.
Though, perhaps, the scent of the rainforest has always been a part of her.
The rainforest and the natural oils she used to use to style her hair.
I let myself fall deeper into the familiar comfort of her and nearly give in to the pull of sleep. I’m fighting tooth and nail to keep myself awake and alert by the time anyone makes a move to talk with me. The sun can’t be far behind, and with it, our pursuers.
“You should sleep.” I turn slightly to find Ademir has approached. He doesn’t bother with any formalities.
“We’ll be moving soon.” Excuses, excuses. Ademir would do perfectly fine scouting.
The old man hesitates before calmly sitting beside me.
Careful not to wake Lillian, I angle myself toward him and wait for him to share what’s on his mind.
He’s been too quiet since we hiked into the shadow.
He’s hardly said a word, even to Lillian.
Whatever the energy is here, he doesn’t want any part of it.
“We will be past the point of no return when we reach that blasted cave.” He pauses with a steadying breath that shows his age. “I’d like to implore you to keep going, no matter what happens.”
Every instinct inside me sets off alarm bells. “That’s not a—”
He holds up a hand to silence me. “If we are followed. If something were to happen from here to the front gate of that colony, I need you to take Lillian and keep going.”
“Ademir,” I warn, quickly shifting toward him. He only raises a finger to his lips and motions to Lillian. It’s to be a secret then, a pact between us.
“There has never been anything more important to me than her m?e.” He swallows again, as if even thinking of Isadora is torturous.
“It pains me, because I do not know what awaits Lillian, but I do know what Isadora wished. I could not deliver Isadora there, but we will get Lillian there.” He nods to reassure himself. “It is what is meant to happen.”
My blood chills when I see the look in his eyes. Before me is the face of a man who has been shown his fate. “What did the forest show you?” I ask, recalling the conversation we had what seems like years ago.
“It does not matter,” he says, shrugging. With one more longing look at Lillian, he steals himself away.
I count three steps before he pauses. “Ms. Williams,” Ademir says from behind me. I turn just in time to see him tilt his head in her direction.
My brow creases as she takes another step and looks down at that same little fire I’ve watched all night. “They’ve not moved.” She jumps slightly at my low tone. I have a hard time believing she didn’t know I was here.
“I know,” she confirms. Something in the way her eyes scan the landscape once more before leaving without another word has my face cringing further. Such a strange bird, always listening, always flitting nearby, never opening herself up.