Chapter 18
18
On Friday, the day before Sarah and Callum were due back, Ben went to his friend, Darren’s, straight from school for tea and a stopover.
Jade had called Sarah earlier to check this was OK.
‘Yes, it’s fine, he’s done it before, although sometimes he gets homesick around bedtime and wants to come back. Are you OK with that?’
‘Of course. I’ll go and pick him up if that happens.’
‘Thanks.’ Sarah’s sigh came down the phone. ‘Ben might not be homesick, but I definitely am. I can’t wait to see him. We’re setting off about 4p.m. so we can break up the drive – we’ll stop over in a layby Callum knows just before Liverpool – so we shouldn’t be too late back tomorrow. What time did you say you’d get him from Darren’s in the morning?’
‘Elevenish.’
‘Perfect. We can collect him. We’ll stop off at yours to get his stuff. It’s on the way to Darren’s.’
That evening, Jade, feeling at a loose end, strolled up towards the quarantine kennels. It was gone six and Aiden hadn’t turned up to take out Fang. She decided to put the little Jack Russell in the dog-walk field for a run about. Then, restless to do something, she started to hose down the block.
A few minutes after she’d started, she heard the door clang at the other end. ‘Watch the floor,’ she called, glancing up, expecting to see Aiden, but it was Finn. ‘It’s slippery,’ she mouthed over the noise of the water as he came along the run.
‘What?’
‘The floor.’ She gestured impatiently, and at the same moment felt her trainer skid beneath her. There was a second when she thought she would save herself, then a horrible stomach-wrenching instant when she knew she wouldn’t. Her feet were sliding from beneath her and she was falling backwards. Her head hit the concrete and she was aware of flashing lights, then of not being able to breathe, then more slowly of pain and of wetness seeping through her sweatshirt.
‘Jade, are you OK? No – stupid question. You went down with a hell of a bang.’ Slowly, she became aware that Finn was crouching beside her in the run.
She struggled to sit up and he put his hand on her arm. ‘Give it a minute.’ There was concern in his eyes. ‘You hit your head, didn’t you? What else hurts?’
‘My back. I’ve grazed it.’ She glanced at the sharp edge of the drain that ran down the edge of the block. ‘And I’m getting soaking wet.’ She attempted to smile, but judging by the expression on his face, she wasn’t making a very good job of it.
‘Take it slowly,’ he said. ‘Lean on me.’ He put his arm around her, supporting her.
She stood up, wincing. ‘Thanks. I’m all right. Can you turn off the hose? I feel such a fool. ’
‘It’s like a skating rink in here.’
‘That’s what I was trying to tell you.’ Sickness was rising in her throat and she hesitated, then leaned forward, gripping hold of the wire netting, until the waves of dizziness passed.
‘Just hold on a minute, Jade.’ She was aware of him close behind her. ‘How are you feeling?’
‘Dizzy, but that’s probably just shock. And I feel like I’ve scraped several layers of skin off my back.’ She screwed up her face. She couldn’t allow herself to be sick so soon after last night’s performance.
‘Take deep breaths.’
She did as he said, but only because she didn’t have much choice. Tears weren’t far away. If she’d been alone she’d have let them out, or at least done a great deal of swearing, but she didn’t dare open her mouth in case she humiliated herself further.
‘Now, slowly. Lean on me.’
‘I’ve got – to get Fang – lock up.’ The words were coming out in gasps.
‘I can do that.’ He looked at her. ‘Hold my arm.’
She did as he said. Why did he have to be so damn calm and rational? Too bloody rational. He never seemed to get ruffled about anything. It was unnerving. And she knew it wasn’t just his calmness that was unnerving. It was his proximity. But she felt too shaken up to do anything but lean on his arm as he led her along the ice rink floor, because if she didn’t, she knew she would fall over and she was so, so scared of falling again.
Finn opened the door at the end of the run and they went out into the evening sunlight.
‘You’re as white as a ghost, Jade.’
‘I’m fine.’
‘Go and get showered off. I’ll get Fang in and lock up.’
‘Careful she doesn’ t go for you.’
‘Relax, Jade. I can handle a stroppy little dog.’
In the end, she had to let him go because he was right. She felt awful and sick and all she wanted to do was sit down. She limped down the yard, aware of him watching her. Hating her vulnerability. But it was all right when she got into the cottage. All right to breathe again in the cool, welcoming dimness. She went upstairs to the bathroom, where she stripped off and inspected the damage.
A jagged graze ran from her shoulder blades down her back to her hip and a purplish bruise was already forming at the base of her spine. Her shoulders ached where she’d wrenched them trying to stop herself falling. Tomorrow, the whole lot would stiffen up and she would hurt like hell. She stepped into the shower, wincing as the water hit her skin. She forced herself to stay under the spray as long as possible. It wasn’t enough. She could see in the mirror that the edges of the graze were still bleeding, but it would have to do for now. She patted herself dry as gently as she could. Putting on a bra was out of the question. She pulled on an old white tee-shirt, which was the softest thing she could find, and some leggings, and went downstairs.
Finn was in the lounge and he glanced up as she came in. ‘Are you all right? Did you cut yourself?’
She shook her head. ‘Just a bit of a graze on my back. I’ll survive. Did you get Fang?’
‘Yes, she’s fine. She’s improved a lot.’
‘Thanks to Aiden,’ she murmured.
He acknowledged this with a nod. ‘And you feel all right in yourself? You hit your head pretty hard.’
‘I’m fine, Finn, stop fussing.’
‘Sorry. I was a first-aider at my last job. Old habits die hard. You could probably do with a stiff drink. Good for shock, but I couldn’t find any. Second thoughts, you shouldn’t have alcohol if you’ve hit your head.’
‘I think I’ve had enough alcohol lately,’ she said, bending to pick up one of her boots that Mickey must have stolen from their place by the back door.
Finn rested his chin in his hands and looked at her. ‘There’s blood coming through your tee-shirt, Jade. You ought to let someone have a look at it. I’ll do it if you like. Or would you rather I ran you down to A&E?’
His grey eyes held hers and she sighed. ‘Yes, I suppose you’re right. I don’t want it getting infected.’
‘So do you trust me to do it? Or do you want to sit in A&E for a few hours?’
Her hesitation stretched out between them. ‘I need to be here in case Ben decides he doesn’t want to stay at Darren’s. There’s a first-aid kit in the kitchen cupboard. I’ll get it in a minute.’
‘I’ll get it.’
The thought of him touching her made her come out in goose bumps. Not because she was attracted to him, she told herself, but because he was a stranger. But the thought of going to A&E was infinitely worse. She’d had enough of hospitals to last her a lifetime. She hadn’t been in one since she’d lost her mother and she still had nightmares about that last, awful day.
When Finn came back, he was carrying the first-aid kit, a packet of cotton wool swabs and some antiseptic.
‘I don’t think you’re supposed to put this on neat. Have you got a little bowl I can dilute some in?’
‘There’s one under the kitchen sink.’
A few moments later, he was back again.
‘Actually, I think I’m fine,’ she said again, her mouth dry. ‘I’m as tough as old boots. I’m sure it’s clean enough.’
‘It won’t take me a minute to check.’ His voice was quietly reasonable. ‘And it’s better to be safe than sorry.’ He started to dilute the antiseptic and lined up a row of cotton wool swabs on the coffee table. Then he came across and knelt by the sofa where she sat. ‘Don’t look so worried. I was doing this sort of thing at work for ten years.’
‘Dangerous place to work, was it?’
‘You’d be amazed at the situations people got themselves into. Where did you hit your head? Can I see?’
She indicated the spot and he parted her hair with gentle fingers. ‘You seem to have got away with that. Let’s have a look at your back. It would be easiest if you lay on your front. You’ll need to roll your top up.’
She did as he said, conscious she wasn’t wearing a bra, tucking her elbows in tight to her breasts.
‘It’s a nasty graze, that. Can I roll this up a bit higher? Unless you want to take it right off.’
She glanced sideways at him, echoes of her dream merging with reality. He grinned. ‘I’m joking about taking it off, but I will need to push it up a bit higher to get to the top of the graze. And I’m afraid you’ll have to slip these down a bit, too. Don’t worry, I can’t see a thing.’
The humour in his voice relaxed her and she let him roll the tee-shirt up past her shoulder blades and slip the waistband of her leggings down a couple of inches.
‘I’ll just clean it up and then you can see how it is tomorrow. This might sting a bit.’
He was right. It did sting. She clamped her teeth together as he dabbed at the graze, but his fingers were gentle. As he worked, he asked her about the phone calls she’d taken that day and how the fund-raising was going, and she answered his questions, surprised. He wasn’t much of a one for small talk. After a while, she realised he was trying to take her mind off what he was doing, and she was grateful.
‘That’s better,’ he said at last. ‘At least it’s stopped bleeding and it’s clean now. Dog kennels aren’t the most hygienic of places to lie down in.’
‘Thank you, Dr McTaggart.’ She pulled her top down and sat up. ‘From drain unblocker to first-aider, is there no end to your talents?’
‘No need to take the mickey.’
‘I’m not.’ She touched his hand. ‘Thanks.’
For a moment there was a softness in his eyes and she thought he was going to say something else. Then he blinked a couple of times and it passed and she wondered if it had ever been there at all.
‘I’ve got some calls to make,’ he said, and got up and went out into the hall.
Jade stayed where she was on the sofa, feeling more stirred up than she had in years. She didn’t just want to go to bed with him, she realised, she wanted to get to know him. To discover everything about him: where he’d gone to school, who his friends were, what his deepest fears were, what he loved, what made him angry and what made him sad.
Startled by the force of her feelings, she giggled into the empty room and suddenly she felt afraid. It was the knock on the head, she told herself. Delayed shock. Sarah would laugh. Or maybe Sarah would understand. Maybe this was how she felt about Callum. She would ask her tomorrow.