12. Looking into the Backfield
Looking into the Backfield
D amn, he’d never seen such a sluggish clock in his life.
Well, not off of a scoreboard when they were ahead by a point, two minutes to go, and the other team was nearing field goal range.
He liked tending bar almost as much as he loved the game; if he didn’t, he’d have found some other way to be a part of the family business like doing the books or something.
Either way, he really, really liked sex with Haley and couldn’t wait for the stroke of midnight.
Didn’t help the pub was dead tonight. Some days, they took in enough revenue for the whole month in one insanely busy night, like the night Haley had pitched in.
Other times, like tonight, they were open only to maintain their reputation and to satisfy the downtown business tenets.
Foothills was a tourist hub, but they’d always had enough of a local following to stay afloat if times got tough. Scott and Brenda had always smoked a hell of a salmon, sausage, jerky, cheddar… Pops wasn’t ready to diversify their sales and sell to retail, but Finn brought it up now and again.
Speak of the devil. Pops strolled in, noting the empty tables, scowled, then parked front and center at the bar. “Vodka. Neat. No ice or lime or any shit that’ll weaken it.”
Pouring the drink, Finn didn’t take his eyes off his dad. Scott looked… haggard. Tired. Not the mountain he usually was.
Sliding the drink across the bar, Finn held onto the glass, demanding an answer first.
“Come on. I can go to another bar. Give me the damn drink.”
“Pops? I’ll let go, when you tell me what gives.”
“Nothin’.”
“Come on. You’re always the one to find a reason to smile when the rest of us choke.” Finn let go of the glass, recognizing it was Scott’s first for the night. And a short one at that.
“Are you happy? Tending bar?”
“Yeah. I am.”
“But you could be so much more. I’ve given you time. You’ve been home for months. It’s time to consider all your options.” What had he been saying about meddling? Pops may not pressure, but he definitely meddled.
“Don’t tell me you want to take back all of your old responsibilities? How many years did you and mom work sunrise to set and then some? Maybe it’s time for you to share the load a bit.”
“I can handle it. Don’t get me wrong, it’ll be nice to set my own schedule and not run myself ragged through football season. Evan and Zoe have taken on a huge share of the load. They’d been planning on it for years, this was sooner than they had intended. But you… you never wanted this.”
Finn gripped his hands on the bar, clenching his jaw. Trying to keep it light, he nodded. “I never planned on anything after football.”
“You’re a good lookin’ guy with a hell of a career under his belt.
You could do whatever you want. You have, what, two teams waiting on your call for assistant coaching positions?
Have you even scheduled yet? Hell, with your history, your personality and knowledge of the game, you could work at any of the sports networks.
But if you ostrich for too long, they’ll lose interest and you’ll lose the opportunity. ”
“Can’t say I’ve ever thought about doing anything but playing. And, well, I like what I’m doing now.”
“As the neighborhood bartender that listens to old men wail about the woes of the world?”
Finn recognized this conversation wasn’t ending anytime soon, certainly not tonight.
He moved to the other side of the bar and took a stool next to Pops.
“I don’t know that I want to be on TV or behind the sidelines.
Hell, I only played in the NFL because that’s how grown-ups get to play serious ball. ”
“And get paid.”
He nudged his dad with his knee. “And bank a ridiculous wad of cash doing what I love.”
“Was it worth it? I watch you walk on that knee, run on that knee, do squats and burpees and push-ups in the backyard until you go pale.”
“Not my first injury. Just the worst.”
“Did it break your heart?” Pops raised his glass, his eyebrows raising in question.
“What?”
Raising his eyebrows again like Finn needed to catch-up quick, he reiterated, “Realizing you’d never play competitively again?”
“Fuck yeah. But I’ve got this great family.
A dad that cares about what I want. A brother and sister that rag on me for being…
well, for being their jackass big brother, but I know they’ve got my back no matter what.
And…” He debated not saying it, but did anyway.
“And I had a hell of a mom that watched every game I ever played. Parents that made sure I always had a home to come home to. That refused to let me stew and regret.”
A half smile, Scott nodded, the red puffiness around his eyes confirming what Finn had suspected. Pops coped amazingly well, but Finn knew he kept a lot of it to himself. “I miss her.”
“Me too.” Finn rested his elbows on the bar, rubbing his hands through his hair. “She knew we’d be a mess without her. Think that’s why she gathered us all back home together. She’d been patient while we spread our wings, but she wasn’t about to let us grow apart.”
Appearing from the kitchen, no doubt having been listening in the whole time instead of finishing her closing routine, Zoe leaned against the doorway and folded her arms. She didn’t say a word, just listened.
Scott took another pull on the vodka. “Occur to you that we’re still living day to day? We packed up her stuff like we were supposed to. Cleaned out her closet, kept what we could, donated what we should. Despite all that, she’s still in the house, and we’re not moving on.”
Finn nodded. “I’m not sure she’s leaving anytime soon.”
“Nah, she’s got her work cut out for her, getting you kids settled.”
“Hey. I’m doing fine.”
Leaned against the doorway to the kitchen, Zoe snorted from her post. She had always been his nosy little sister, and he had no doubt she would continue that role until they were gray and confused in the nursing home together.
He shot her a glare. “No?”
“No,” she snorted again, arms more wrapped around her middle than crossed now. “I’m not sure what to make of you these days. You go to work here five to seven nights a week, beat your knee to crap every day, then taking an embarrassingly long shower.”
He flipped her off.
“No really.” She crossed and uncrossed her feet. “You look like you’re doing all peachy on the outside, but that’s what you always do when things get tough. You put on your game face and won’t let the rest of us see what’s going on underneath. I’m worried.”
“About what?”
Pops nudged his knee, then drained his drink by half. “What really happened with Trace this time around? You didn’t seem to make much effort to take her out like you used to; I hardly even saw her once you got back.”
Now would be a great time for a last-minute customer.
Brenda had brought them all together at the end for a damn good reason. She was the heart and soul of their little family, and wouldn’t rest easy until she knew they were going to keep each other in line. Took them a while, they’d lived so far away for so long, but they were in it together.
“When I got home, I was hurting. Bad. I’d been counting on another few years in the pros.
Of being able to go for a decent run without limping for the rest of the day.
Losing Mom was fucking shitty; something none of us will ever be okay with.
” Moving on wasn’t an option; he’d always be missing that part of himself, as would they all.
Zoe nodded. “And Trace? You two were joined at the hip back in the day. This time, it’s like you weren’t willing to let her back in.”
“Getting back together with Trace was a mistake. I never should have crossed that line. Never should have strung her along like that. But it’s over now, and I’m glad she realized it before it was too late, that I don’t deserve her.”
Zoe countered, “Do you deserve Haley?”
He grimaced; her comment stabbed straight into his gut.
“Watch it. Haley and I are… no, you know what? You’re the one that said I should have a fling.
Haley doesn’t want anything from me, and I don’t have any expectations from this whole thing.
I’m having fun with a beautiful woman who makes me laugh. Isn’t that the point of a fling?”
After a long-ass pause, Scott drained the last sip of his drink. “Mom would have had your back. No matter what. Unless you were being a douchebag. I’m glad you’re happy, but there’s more to life than a good lay.”
Finn and Zoe both raised eyebrows at him. Even for a cool dad, that was a whole conversation he’d never expected. What dad said douchebag? He didn’t even say it himself.
“Oh, shut it. You kids know what I mean. We need to live our lives. I’ve been doing a little soul-searching, trying to figure out what your mom would think of all that’s going on with us these days.
Finn, be careful with Haley. For her and for you.
Don’t string her along, but don’t you doubt for a moment that you deserve to be happy.
We all like Trace, but if she doesn’t light your fire, then it’s a good thing it ended before you were in too deep.
” Scott rose from the stool and walked to the door.
Hand on the bronze plate by the lock, he gazed out at the empty street before turning back.
“I’m kicking you kids out of the house. Not today.
Not tomorrow. But it’s time for tough love before you kill each other.
Or drive me bonkers. You’ve got four weeks.
” He nodded to Finn. “Clock’s tickin’. Better schedule those interviews, or not, if that’s not the direction you choose to go.
But don’t dick around or time will make the decision for you. ”
Well shit. Is this how Pops treated his players on the high school team? Move your ass or get it handed to you. Finn rose from the stool and walked to the door. “What about you?”
“Me?”