Chapter 25
S carlett took a deep breath as she shut the back door behind her, but instead of the fresh air she was expecting, she inhaled a cloud of cigarette smoke.
Coughing, she wrinkled her nose in poorly masked disgust and turned to see Leonard standing against the wall. For a brief moment, she could see the wayward boy that he once was– and potentially remained to be– just with a few more years on him.
“Hello.” He winked at her. “Been busy?”
There’s that look again.
Scarlett shrugged. “Usual stuff. How’s things?”
Leonard gave her a coy smile. “All the better for seeing you in the flesh again.”
Not knowing or particularly interested in what he meant, she nodded at the cigarette in his hand. “Awful habit, that.”
“Yeah, it is. Sorry.” He threw it on the ground, stubbed it out with his foot, and turned to face her, one shoulder still leaning against the wall. “So…”
Scarlett thrust her hands in her coat pockets, not really sure what to do with herself. “So.” She smiled, nodding.
“I hear you and my brother were out meeting suppliers yesterday. Was it a success?”
Scarlett’s heart sank.
What did he know?
“I think so, yes.”
“That’s good. I’m pleased.”
Scarlett simply nodded her response. She could feel her nerves getting the better of her and she didn’t want her voice to give anything away.
“I had some success myself, actually.” Leonard reached out and touched the lapel of her coat, as if removing something. “I managed to get the catering sorted.”
Irritation quickly overshadowed her nerves.
What game is he playing?
“A friend of the family. I reached out, and she’s been able to pull some strings with a business they finance, so catering is all sorted.”
“That’s fantastic news.” Scarlett beamed the most genuine smile she could muster. “That’s a tremendous help, and Mrs Wilson will be relieved, bless her.”
“Indeed, she will.” Leonard was still touching her coat, which was making Scarlett feel increasingly uncomfortable.
“I need to get on, but that really is great. I bet Ana?se is pleased, too?” Scarlett hoped that a reminder of his fiancée might pull him back into some kind of order.
It worked. He retracted his hand and smiled at her.
“Very much so. It all seems to be coming together. Not long until the big day now. Although still lots to do.” He paused, continuing to look at her for a long, uncomfortable moment.
“But I’ll let you get going for now. Always a pleasure, Scarlett. ”
At that moment she spotted Andrzej in the distance, making his way to the greenhouse, and she felt a rush of relief wash over her– she almost felt like running to him, getting as far away as possible from Leonard’s intense gaze and vague innuendos.
“Thanks, I’ll catch you later.” Producing a curt smile, she left Leonard standing at the wall and made a beeline for the greenhouse, hearing him light another cigarette behind her.
Edward was right. There was absolutely no similarity between them other than their looks.
Edward was surly, awkward, and stubborn, no doubt about it, but what you see is what you get.
At least he was honest. Whereas Leonard’s warmth came from a place of superficial charm and something else that she couldn’t quite put her finger on– whatever it was, she didn’t trust it.
She squinted as she walked on. The sun was setting, throwing its final golden glow across the back lawns and shimmering across the loch at the bottom of the hill. That, and the bronzed trees on the edge of the woods to her left, all made for a perfect picture.
Away from Leonard’s toxic smoke, she took another deep breath and welcomed the damp freshness of her surroundings. The tranquillity of the gardens was always a tonic, but there was something visceral and magic about its stillness and beauty that evening that tugged at her heart.
It felt a lot like perfection.
She smiled to herself and continued on her way to the greenhouse, where she could see Andrzej putting some small tools away.
He looked up and smiled as she approached.
“Hey, Scarlett, nice to see you.” Any worries she had about seeing him after his visit to the main house, because of her disappearing act, dissipated. He was, to her relief, his usual warm and friendly self.
“Hi, Andrzej, nice to see you too.” Scarlett returned his smile, glancing back towards the house. Leonard had returned inside, making her relax further. “I just wanted to apologise for last night. It was thoughtless of me not to call or message.”
Andrzej dismissed the comment away with his hand.
“We’re all good and you’re safe, which is the main thing.
” He continued packing away a handful of clean forks and trowels.
“The weather is turning wet and cold, so need to make sure all the tools are clean and stored away.” He paused for a moment before continuing, “It’s harder to sort them once the rust sets in. Best to prevent than fix, huh?”
Andrzej looked up at her and she wondered if they were still talking about gardening paraphernalia.
It didn’t take long for the penny to drop, though, and Scarlett nodded, understanding that she needed to go home.
“I’m always around, though, for the fixing part, if you need me.” His amiable smile made her heart swell by a centimetre or two.
“Thanks, Andrzej.” Scarlett turned to leave but then paused. “Will we be seeing you for dinner later?”
Andrzej shook his head gently. “Not tonight.”
Scarlett nodded again. “Okay, see you tomorrow?”
“Absolutely, it’s lentil soup night.” He smiled again.
“See you, then.” Scarlett gave him a small wave and left him to it.
It was time to head home .
The idea of it being that still felt alien, yet the word was becoming easier to say each day.
As she approached the front door, her phone vibrated in her pocket. She’d reply quickly and then deal with whatever was waiting for her beyond the threshold.
She’d thought it would be Edward, but a message from Jason glared up at her.
Jason: Thanks for sending me the address to ship up your things.
I won’t be sending them, though. I’ve decided to come and see you.
Of course I’ll still bring your belongings, but don’t think for a moment that I’ve given up on you coming home.
And I’m not and will not be considering anything as terminal as a divorce anytime soon.
I believe there’s still a way for us to move past this.
A marriage is more than just a mistake, and it was a mistake!
We can talk more when I see you and I hate to say it, but there is the small matter of my grandmother’s ring.
Mother has requested that it be kept in Bath for safekeeping until you come home.
Like I said, though, we’ll talk more when I’m there.
A fucking mistake? You’re having a baby with another woman, you absolute prick.
Scarlett took a steadying breath.
He wasn’t getting anywhere near the sodding ring. She would put it in Edward’s safe if she had to, but it was about the only bargaining chip she had left at this stage.
Her dislike for Jason, his mother, and everything they represented was growing bigger and uglier by the day.
And what is he thinking threatening to come here?
Scarlett shook her head. There was no way he’d drive all the way up here. He’d get a nosebleed if he was further than five miles away from his mother.
But why all the theatrics? Scarlett groaned inwardly.
This could wait until morning. She had to speak to her own mother first.
Whether Scarlett liked it or not, she was in the wrong, despite June’s earlier reaction. And she had to make things right– no matter how uncomfortable it felt, which it did, in no small measure.
Scarlett slid her phone back into her pocket. She prepared herself to literally face the music as Carole King was singing at the top of her lungs through Alexa– probably consoling her mother on some deep and profound level.
As she entered the living room, she spotted June on the sofa, staring into the wood burner with a glass of red wine in her hand; the usual smell of something cooking was absent, so she’d clearly opted for skipping food and diving straight into the bottle.
Scarlett walked over and sat beside her. June didn’t turn to look at her.
“Alexa, quieter please,” Scarlett said loudly over Carole King crooning over some heartache or other. Compliant as ever, Alexa reduced the volume enough for conversation to be possible.
“I’m sorry, Mum.” There, she said it. Properly.
June sighed. “I know,” she replied, looking at Scarlett. “I’m sorry too.”
“I should have called or messaged– I should have known you’d be worried. I just wasn’t thinking, and it’s no excuse. It was careless. You were right.”
“I’m not talking about that. I probably overreacted to be fair, it all just felt very out of control, but Andrzej told me you were more than likely with Edward, and it made sense, I just wasn’t listening to reason.
” June paused for a long moment. “I’m sorry for running out on you.
I should never have done it that way– it was unforgiveable. ”
Scarlett’s mouth opened to speak, but no words came out.
This wasn’t how she expected this conversation to go. At all.
Her mother was a woman of few words, especially when it came to anything painful from the past, including her youth and Scarlett’s parentage. June had never talked about her leaving Bath without so much as a phone call.
“I can’t actually tell you what made me do it.
I was at work, nothing out of the ordinary, you’d been at uni, close to graduating, and something just came over me.
I felt like I was suffocating, as if the world was shrinking around me with every breath I took.
It felt like your Aunt Maggie, who was busy with her shop and her own life, was all that was keeping me from disappearing into my own shadow, and I couldn’t take it anymore, I just felt like I needed to get out of there, somewhere out in the open, just so I could breathe again.
I’d been given an open invite to work here years before, and the idea just dawned on me, and it became the only glimmer of light I could see.
I packed a small bag, scribbled you and Maggie a letter, and just left.
I didn’t hesitate and I didn’t look back. ”
June paused again, taking a moment to collect her thoughts, but Scarlett still couldn’t speak, so June continued.
“After I settled here, I was too ashamed to visit you, especially because I couldn’t find the words to even begin to explain my reasoning.
Maggie then told me about you meeting a fancy author and being swept up in a wild romance and running off to get married.
She told me about your beautiful life and then…
well, too much time passed, and I didn’t know if I would ever fit into that…
your new world. I didn’t feel I deserved to. ”
June and Scarlett looked at each other for a long time, neither speaking, and it was June who broke the silence again.
“I tried to write, and I obviously did send the odd card or message, but the words always felt empty, and I realised I’d been absent long before I even left.
In fact, I don’t think I’ve ever really been there .
And I can’t even begin to tell you how very sorry I am.
I know it’s too little and much too late, but you coming here, being here, it’s felt like I finally have a chance to be some kind of mother to you, even though it doesn’t even begin to make up for…
well, everything.” June finally fell silent, looking back into her glass.
Scarlett released her breath, which she must have been holding for longer than she realised, trying desperately to process the information and emotions that were batting around her like the ball inside a pinball machine.
She was still unable to say anything, so instead she took her mother’s free hand and squeezed gently.
Sometimes, maybe words weren’t needed.