Chapter 56
Wilder
I walked out of the pharmacy with two bottles of extra strength rut suppressants rattling in my pocket. The pharmacist had given them to me with narrowed eyes and a warning against taking too many, not that they could stop me when rut suppressants were available over the counter.
Lucy’s shop taunted me, a beacon of pure temptation across the street.
It had been seventy-four hours since I’d last seen her, and I was on the verge of losing my fucking mind.
After the warehouse fire, I’d worked my normal two days…
and then I’d taken an extra shift to cover for one of my guys who was out sick.
We were in the process of hiring a new firefighter but were short-staffed until we did.
It was a perfectly logical explanation for why I’d been working so much. Not suspicious at all.
The devil on my shoulder scoffed and crossed his arms. If you weren’t such a coward, you’d be fucking her in her nest right now.
And that was exactly why I needed to stay away.
You could just tell her the truth. Then she can decide if she still wants to be with you.
I’d tried my best to ignore the angel on my shoulder, but I knew my time for secret keeping was up. Lucy deserved to know the truth, even if it meant I lost her.
Before I could talk myself out of it, I jogged across the street and pushed her shop door open.
Lucy’s bright floral scent saturated the air, but instead of its usual strawberry sweetness, there was a sharp burnt edge to it.
I was instantly alert. My heart raced when I didn’t see her.
Had something happened? Fuck, she needed some sort of alert button attached to her at all times so she could signal us if she ever needed us.
“Lucy?” I called out.
“Back here!”
I sprinted to the back room and stopped short. My brain needed a second to process what I was seeing because my omega was on top of a ladder.
“What the fuck?” I hurried to her side, my hands immediately going to her hips to steady her.
“Hi,” she said with a defeated sigh. “I hope your day’s going better than mine.”
“What are you doing?” I growled. Visions of her falling flitted through my mind and I tightened my grip.
“There was a water stain on the ceiling that I’ve been putting off painting, so I figured I’d get it done. But once I got started, I realized the plaster is crumbling, so I have to patch that and now my arms hurt.”
Her face was splattered with bits of joint compound and I reached up to wipe them off. “You need to get down from there.”
Her frown deepened. “I have to finish smoothing this before it dries.”
“I’ll do it for you.” I lifted her off the ladder and wrapped my arms around her from behind, but her body was stiff against mine.
“I can do it, Wilder.”
“I didn’t say you couldn’t.”
“Didn’t you? You don’t even think I can stand on a ladder correctly.”
“Sweetheart, that’s—”
She shrugged out of my hold, leaving me cold. “I’m really busy, and I know you are, too,” she said in a clear dismissal.
My sleep-deprived brain sluggishly tried to piece together what had just happened. “Time-out. What’s wrong?”
“Nothing. I just have a lot to get done.” She sniffed and wiped at her face.
Fuck, that sound was enough to destroy me. I closed the gap between us, my chest pressing against her back. “Tell me what I did wrong so I can fix it.”
“I’m just tired of everyone treating me like I can’t do anything. Just because I’m an omega and like girly things doesn’t mean I’m dumb.”
I spun her around to face me. “Who said you’re dumb?”
She shrugged.
I cupped her jaw with one hand. “Give me names. I’ll take care of them.” I suspected it was her exes. The little she’d told us about them the other day had fucking killed me.
“I don’t know. Everyone, I guess. You don’t even think I can stand on a ladder.”
I let out a slow breath, trying to find the right words to say.
Expressing myself had never been my strong suit, but Lucy made me want to try.
“Just because I want to do things for you doesn’t mean I don’t think you’re capable.
How could I think that when you run this shop and are good at everything you do? ”
“I’m not good at camping.” She arched a haughty eyebrow.
My lips twitched. “What are you talking about? You’re a total pro on the mountain.”
Surprised laughter burst from her chest, and it was the best fucking sound I’d ever heard.
She wrapped her arms around me, and I returned her embrace, holding her tight.
Her fingers twisted in my shirt, but I stayed silent, waiting.
This was what I was good at. I could stand and hold her all day until she was ready to share what was bothering her.
“I got an email from Fran Soto,” she said in an almost whisper. “She invited me for an interview the day after tomorrow.”
Ahh. There it was.
“That’s amazing, sweetheart,” I said gently, even as dread and pride rocked through me in equal measure.
I would never admit it, would never do anything to hold Lucy back from her dreams, but I didn’t want her to go.
There was no way I could handle being hundreds of miles away from her, but the sensory overload of big cities made it hard for me to function.
Even Starlight Grove could be a lot for me. “Are you nervous?”
She nodded. “Nervous to get it. Nervous to not get it.”
What did I say to that? I wished Leo was here. He was so much better at this stuff than me. The only thing I knew how to do was hold her tighter, as if my body could shield her from the world.
“You only submitted your application last night, right? They must really want you.”
“Yeah, maybe.” She pulled away enough to wipe her cheeks with her shirtsleeve. “I’m sorry for snapping. I panicked when I got the email so I decided to spackle the ceiling. Using those healthy coping skills.”
“You get to be grumpy sometimes. I just want you to be happy.”
“I’ve missed you.” Her whispered confession destroyed me. I grabbed her hand and she entwined our fingers with a squeeze.
“I’ve missed you, too, sweetheart.”
“Do you think I should take the internship if they offer it to me?” Her bright blue eyes stared up at me, beautiful and vulnerable.
No.
“It sounds like an amazing opportunity to advance your career,” I hedged.
“Yeah, you’re right.” She smiled, but there was a strained edge to it that I hated. Was it nerves around the interview or something else?
“Are you still on shift? Or can we get lunch?” she asked.
I grimaced. “Still on shift, unfortunately. I have a few minutes before I have to head back, though, so you better finish your spackling.”
I resisted my possessive urges and took a step back. I wanted to fix the ceiling for her, but if this was what she needed from me, I would give that to her.
Lucy’s lips parted before transforming into a wide smile. “I think it just needs one more layer.” She pressed a kiss to the corner of my mouth before grabbing the knife and stepping back onto the ladder.
I immediately moved behind her, my hands going to her ass.
For stability.
She glanced down at me but didn’t protest as she finished up patching the ceiling.
“Now I just have to wait for it to dry before I sand it. At least that’s what the online article said.”
My hands hovered around her as she climbed down from the ladder.
“You did such a good job, sweetheart.”
Her sweet “Thank you” was the best gift in the world.
As I headed back to the firehouse a little while later, I realized I had once again failed to tell her the truth about me.