Chapter 30
Chapter thirty
Kate
Everything changed.
One moment I was guarding my heart against Tristan, and the next, he ripped the rug out from under me when he confessed his feelings.
Never saw that coming.
Just like I never, not once in a million years, could’ve imagined him asking me for the opportunity to earn my trust. If there’d been any semblance of a wall left around my heart, he’d obliterated it.
That knowledge didn’t freak me out even half as much as I thought it would. Who knew? Who knew the person who’d make me feel again would be Tristan freaking Blake.
And yes, I was still very much aware of his past. I just chose to leave it where it belonged.
“Comfy?” I asked Millie as soon as she snuggled into her pillow.
She was on her side with Mochi clutched close to her chest. “Mhm.”
Her excitement had bubbled over from the minute she and Tristan had walked through the door. We could hardly get a word in over her fast-paced talking and need to explore every corner of the penthouse.
But now when it was just me and her in Tristan’s massive guest bedroom, it was easy to read the fear in her eyes. Taking the spot next to her, I too turned on my side to face her. I tucked a few curly strands behind her ear.
“What’s with the worried look on your pretty face?”
Her green eyes held mine for a split second before her gaze shot to the ceiling. She didn’t say anything, simply stared for the longest time.
“Hey,” I said, stroking her cheek. “What’s up?”
Finally, her eyes met mine, shiny with tears threatening to fall. My heart squeezed painfully.
“When Tristan and Izzy came to the school, I thought something happened to you...like…like…Mommy.” The first tear fell then another and another. “I was scared.”
“Oh, Bug.” Wrapping my arms around her, I pulled her to me. “I’m sorry I scared you.”
“I don’t want you to leave me like Mommy did.”
The bruised organ behind my ribs shattered into a million pieces for this little girl. I held her tighter, my tears sliding down my cheeks. I couldn’t make that promise.
Life was too damn unpredictable. And then there was Taelyn.
What if a judge sided with her? Would Millie feel like I’d let her down? That I’d abandoned her when she needed me the most?
No. I couldn’t think like that.
One day, one problem at a time.
Right now, I still had my little girl in my arms. And…I had a husband. One I desperately needed to talk to since there hadn’t really been time for that.
I waited until Millie’s breathing evened out before I slowly slipped out of bed and made my way to Tristan’s room. I’d been itching to go to him since he’d said goodnight to us a while ago.
Instead of knocking, I darted inside and clicked the door shut behind me. Tristan, who paced in front of his window, faced me, eyes wide with concern.
“Kate. Is it Millie? Is everything okay?” Gaze frantically sweeping over me, he rushed forward. “Do you feel sick?”
We met each other in the middle of the room. The instant he could, he reached for me. Cradling my face in his palms, he tilted my head back.
“Millie’s fine,” I told him, my voice soft. “She’s sound asleep.”
He nodded like he understood. But I knew he didn’t when he asked, “Why are you here?”
I could’ve told him. Could’ve confessed I didn’t want to wait to be with him. That despite the gnawing fear inside my bones, I trusted him.
Instead, I rolled onto the balls of my feet and hooked my hand behind his neck. One quick tug was all it took for our mouths to fuse together.
Something between a gasp and a groan rumbled from his chest. Low and throaty, it bled through my pores, setting my pulse on fire. I hummed. Then again when his big hands shot to my waist, and he lifted me.
Legs wrapped around him; my goosebumps got goosebumps. My heart didn’t know whether it wanted to stop beating altogether or tear from the confines of my chest. And he hadn’t even taken charge yet.
Aside from his brutal grip on my ass, I was still very much in control.
He let me slide my tongue into his mouth. Allowed me to taste and claim him like he’d done to me so many times before.
We stood like that, lips locked, tongues dueling until the need for air finally broke us apart. Chests heaving, our gazes locked on to each other. His eyes burned with something I couldn’t quite put my finger on.
I just knew that look filled my entire body with warmth.
Not the lustful kind either. This was different. Deeper.
Slowly lifting his hand to my face, he dragged a thumb over my cheek. “What are you doing?” His voice was so low, so soft, almost like he’d been afraid to ask the question.
Ironic. I was scared too. Still, I pushed the words from my throat. “Trusting you.”
A deep frown wrinkled his brows. It didn’t last long.
When my words registered, fully registered, he walked us to the bed where we fell onto the mattress in a mess of tangled limbs.
Rolling me beneath his big body, he pinned me in place with a deliciously dark stare.
Shivers ran down my spine while he stared and stared until I forgot how to breathe.
“What?” I asked.
His gaze never wavered from mine. “You’re beautiful.”
He might as well have brushed his fingers over every sensitive spot on my skin. Those words had the same effect. Warmth spread through my chest, crept up my neck, and settled in my cheeks. I didn’t look away. No matter how desperately I wanted to, I didn’t.
“Sure you want to do this?” he asked. “Here? In this bed?” The last three words came out hoarse, almost broken.
My gaze slid to the slow bob of his Adam’s apple before drifting up to his waiting stare.
Was I sure? “It’s just a bed,” I whispered.
Needing to touch him, I moved my hands toward his face but before I could touch his skin, those long fingers clamped around my wrists and slammed my arms into the mattress.
He squeezed once, twice, then slowly released his grip to smooth his hands over my palms and thread his fingers through mine.
The veins in his forearms popped so freaking fantastically.
I wanted to lift my head and trace them with my tongue.
Heat bloomed in my core. The tug so damn instant, I would’ve squeezed my thighs together if it weren’t for the man settled between them.
“Are you waiting for me to beg?”
His eyes darkened, but he shook his head. “Not tonight.” He released one of my hands to brush his fingers along my jaw. “Tonight, I just need you to be sure. There’ll be no going back; there’ll be—”
Before he could finish that sentence, I used all my strength to surge off the mattress and cover his mouth with mine. My free hand speared into his hair, nails ruthlessly digging into his scalp. I kissed him hard, sucking on his bottom lip and pulling it between my teeth.
“I’m sure,” I breathed. “Now would you please just fuck me already?”
The growl that tore from his lungs melted my insides. Liquid heat rushed through my veins and set my pulse on fire.
“Such a filthy little mouth,” he murmured. “What ever will I do with it?”
In a flash, he clutched my throat, thumb and middle finger digging into the spot under my jaw. He didn’t hurt me. Simply applied enough pressure to ease me down onto the bed.
I went willingly. Eagerly. I wanted this, wanted him, more than I’d wanted anything.
Pinning me with a stare so dark and, so intense, it stole my breath, he squeezed a little harder. My tongue darted out, slowly sliding across my dry lips. His gaze dropped to mouth and stayed there.
Five, maybe six seconds ticked by before we locked eyes again. And holy moly, the predatory gleam shining in his dark irises hit me with a fresh wave of goosebumps.
One corner of his sinful lips slowly curled as he tracked the tiny bumps spreading across my skin—up one arm, down the other. My neck, my chest, before finally stopping at my breasts.
I was still wearing my pajamas. That didn’t mean shit though. Anyone with eyes could see my nipples straining against the flimsy material. He sure did. Much like mine had earlier, his tongue slipped out to lick a slow path across his bottom lip.
The way he stared... My goodness, I’d never felt more desired or bold.
Quickly slipping my hands beneath my shirt, I palmed my breasts and squeezed them together. Already strung so damn tight, that small touch drew a moan from my throat. Or maybe it was the way his hold on my throat tightened or the angry growl from his chest that did it.
“If you’re so intent on just looking,” I said, breathless. “I’ll give you something to look at.”
To prove my point, I rolled my nipples between my fingers. As good as it felt, it wasn’t enough. I needed more. I needed his hands and mouth on me. Before I could even think about voicing any of it, he grabbed my wrists and slammed my hands down on either side of my head.
I blinked, and he was right there, nose pressed to mine and his hot breath fluttering over my lips. “Someone needs a lesson in patience.”
He might as well have given me very graphic descriptions of all the ways he wanted to take me, his words had the same freaking effect.
“Yeah, well.” I sounded even more breathless. “It’s not nice to leave people high and dry.”
“Dry?” Keeping his eyes trained on me, he pushed to his knees. The fingers that’d been wrapped around my wrists brushed down my arms and the side of my breasts before settling on the waistband of my shorts.
Instead of pulling them down like I wanted him to, his fingertips kept on traveling. Over my hips, down to my knees and up the inside of my thighs. His touch was deliberately slow and so damn tortuous.
And the closer he got to where I wanted him, the more restless I became.
When he eventually reached the hem of my shorts, I was ready to take matters into my own hands, just to find some relief.
Tristan knew.
The bastard dug his fingers into my skin and spread my legs wider, but he didn’t do a damn thing to soothe the relentless aching and throbbing.