Chapter 37 – Juliana
W ith my arms full of food, I step into the backstage area of Sable to find Liam. I find Teo, the bouncer, updating the chalkboard sign first.
“You do know, when it comes to a place like Sable, it’s very likely that’s not accurate anymore, right?” I huff, partly annoyed and partly amused.
He shrugs. “None of my business when it comes to the members, but it’s fun messing with the papaya-to-be. Let me take those.” For such a large and intimidating guy, he’s actually a teddy bear.
He relieves me of my burdens. Or, at least, some of them.
After that middle of the night call a few weeks ago, there’s been nothing firm I can put my finger on, but the wounded woman deep inside of me is seeing signs, signs that I don’t like.
He didn’t come home that one night before he left for Ethan’s.
I’ve overheard him on the phone at home a few times now where he doesn’t mention the call to me once we’re in the same room again.
Silly maybe.
Maybe not.
He lied to me about telling his parents. What else might he lie about?
We’re having sex less often. When we do, I’m the one to initiate it.
He worries about causing me more Braxton Hicks contractions.
They’re happening, but that’s normal in the third trimester, and I have to wonder if that’s all there is to it.
I’ve been battling body image issues since my divorce, thanks to Chad.
Being this far along doesn’t help no matter how often Liam acts turned on by the way I look with a basketball residing in my uterus.
And, there’s his past. Liam’s been a player since long before I knew him. Can a guy who was used to sleeping with multiple beautiful women whenever he pleased really be content sitting at home with not-so-little but definitely older and very pregnant me?
“Mr. Culver’s not made it in yet, by the way,” Teo says over his shoulder as he carries the cookies and casserole I made to the office. Yes, I’m still trying to feed him regularly when he works late. The way to a man’s heart and all.
“Not made it in yet?” He had a therapy appointment this afternoon. Maybe that’s why. I would’ve thought he’d be here by now. It’s after dark and the club opens in a few minutes.
Teo simply shrugs again and I offer him some cookies for his trouble.
After thanking me, he leaves to take up his post by the entrance.
I stroll around the office, feeling mildly like a trespasser back here without Liam, Hudson or Santi with me.
Maybe I’ll head out to the floor. Surely, Hudson’s here if not the other two.
Just as I’m decided, I glance down at Liam’s desk and see a note written in his spiky handwriting which makes my pulse spike –
Bernal Heights, Shaw Realty, 7PM
Apartment for Felicity
An apartment for Felicity? Seven tonight? Is that why he’s not made it here yet? Why would he be helping Felicity find an apartment?
Images swim before my eyes of them hugging in his office at Culver and again right here.
She’s been with the club since it opened.
They’ve known each other even longer than we have.
She’s his employee. Just like Addison was Chad’s .
My ears are ringing. I can hear Addison telling me I look frazzled and passing me a cup of coffee that morning.
My vision turns blurry with tears, remembering the way Chad kissed her outside the Ritz-Carlton.
He’d been paying her rent for six months before I discovered their affair. Stupid Juliana missed all the signs.
No, no, no. Slow down. Talk to him , a little voice in my head that sounds remarkably like Becca’s tells me .
Yes, that’s right. We’re not jumping on the crazy train yet. We’re going to talk to Liam.
I head out toward the main floor where members have started gathering around the bar.
I note Felicity is at her post, greeting guests and members, when the door to the entryway opens for someone else to join the night’s debauchery.
God, she’s so lovely, not to mention she’s only in her mid-twenties with a body to die for.
Stop it. Stop comparing yourself negatively to other women, that same little voice says.
Forcing myself to do so, I note the music is playing and the dancers are performing while a woman is pleasuring herself on the sofa over there.
Two men watch her, enraptured. Two other men wearing masks are kissing in a corner.
Three couples are heading into the Switch playroom.
Just another night at Sable. It’s not your run-of-the-mill nightclub by any means, but it’s normal here, and it calms me.
Across the room, I spot Ivy. I had no idea she’d be here. She’d messaged me earlier wanting to arrange brunch at Twisted Anchor. We’ve not seen each other since she got back from Ethan’s. She’s watching one of the dancers in his cage and holding a glass of red wine.
I smile and start to head her way but, before I can reach her, Hudson appears behind her.
Harder to get close to, Santi and Liam jokingly describe Hudson as the hissing cat in their friendship trio, naturally aloof like my sister’s cat, Beans. They’re not wrong.
Considering his controlled manners, I wasn’t shocked when Liam shared what Hudson’s particular kink is, but I am surprised when I see his head dipping low, his lips less than an inch from Ivy’s ear as he whispers something. It’s an oddly intimate move for Hudson.
Ivy’s response is to spin around and throw her wine in his face.
“Oh shit.” Even from thirty feet away, I can feel the tension swirling between them. Hudson says something before stalking off. Ivy only hesitates for a beat before she follows him. They disappear down the red-lit hallway where the playrooms are located. What the hell?
As I stand there pondering what I just witnessed, more people walk in from the entryway, three loud men in pricey suits.
One of them is my ex-husband.
“Oh, what in the actual fuck,” I grumble, unable to believe my eyes.
You’d think San Francisco is a small town in the Ozarks the way this son of a bitch keeps popping up lately. Why is he here? He’s not a member. One of those men he’s with must be. I’m certain he doesn’t know Liam’s a co-owner as it’s not something they advertise.
Has he been following me or something? I feel uncomfortable, recalling some of our fights during the divorce.
I know for a fact Chad was furious when the university library project was dangled in front of him and then swiftly yanked away again.
Liam took a lot of pleasure in composing an email to the university stating that Culver Construction would not be working with his firm and cc’d Chad on it.
Stepping back toward the bar, I attempt to blend in with others so I may watch Chad surveying his surroundings.
His eyes, those rich warm brown eyes I fell in love with at the age of twenty-two, have turned chillier with age.
They glitter with lust at the moment as he stares at the female dancers in their feathers and thongs.
He’s here for a reason, and it has nothing to do with me.
Was he always a piece of shit or when did that change?
It doesn’t really matter now. It’s obvious he’s come to Sable to have certain appetites whetted tonight.
Poor Addison, I think, and I really do feel sorry for her. Has she had their baby yet? Is she home nursing a little one right now while her husband is out on the prowl? My stomach rolls threateningly at the thought. Should I tell her? Would she believe me?
“Juliana?” I turn to find Liam behind me, eating one of the cookies I baked. His smile is so genuine and sweet, and I know I love him so much. Could he ever hurt me the way Chad did? It seems impossible. “Honey, what’s wrong?” he asks, his brow furrowing.
“I can’t believe him,” I say shakily as I point out Chad.
It takes Liam a moment to clock him and his expression turns scary when he does. Violence ripples and rolls off of him in waves, so I quickly grasp his hand. I can’t let him murder someone in the middle of his club.
Before he can shake me off, someone else has spotted Chad – Addison. “You bastard. How could you?!” Her anguished sob echoes around the room and resonates deep inside where my scars lie, buried but not erased. How could you? How many times did I ask him that in my head?
She’s still pregnant. Very pregnant. I’m not sure how she got in, but Teo looms behind her.
No one else stands by her side. All the people here to have a good time tonight are either watching the little scene evolving like it’s a performance or they’re moving away like it’s the plague.
I don’t care if Chad is humiliated, but I’ll admit I care that she is.
“Teo,” Liam barks at the bouncer. One nod, a single gesture from his boss, and Teo acts.
Chad’s being escorted out the door with his arm roughly twisted behind his back before he can even fully go from bafflement to denial of his intentions to anger when he spots Liam.
I hope Teo breaks his arm. Liam says a word to the two men who were with Chad and they duck back out the door, shame-faced.
There’s still a crowd around us, taking it all in. Fascinated, curious… amused. Without a single thought, I hurry over to Addison, gently taking her by the elbow. “Come along with me,” I whisper.
She stares at me with glassy eyes for several seconds, not fully comprehending, maybe not even recognizing me initially, before she follows without protest. She’s numb inside. I know. I’ve been there.