Chapter Five –
Creative… snow fun…
Drake
S core! I could not believe I’d managed it, but I had. I stood by the stables, grinning. Six reindeer and their accessories were being delivered. We usually took sleigh rides, but the shire horses dragged the sleigh. This time I had real reindeer! A guy was also staying in a room above the stables. He’d built a pen around them to let the reindeer move freely, but they’d be bedded down in a couple of stalls we had free. Who said I couldn’t plan shit?
Phoe would love this!
Rock, Gunner, and Apache - Apache’s POV
“How many turkeys?” Rock asked.
“Mrs Ames gave us a list. She put the weight of the turkeys down and how many needed,” Gunner answered.
“We are just buying these from a shop, right? I ain’t hunting these fuckers,” I added.
“Who the fuck are you? Daniel Boone? Of course we’re heading to a store,” Rock replied, amused.
“Good. How are we cooking them?” Gunner inquired.
Rock and I sent him a shocked glare.
“What?” Rock asked.
“Drake ordered us to cook the turkeys,” Gunner responded.
“Well, I don’t think we’d get into the kitchen. Mrs Ames will have the catering staff in there. How about we get those friers? Stick the turkey in there and fry the fucker?” Rock said after several moments.
“Fried turkey at Christmas?” I asked dubiously.
“Problem, brother? Maybe you want to stand watch over it to baste it?” Gunner snapped.
“Fried turkey is fine,” I replied. What could possibly go wrong?
Jared
I shook my head. Damn, those guys had no clue. Not really shocked, however, I picked up the phone and dialled Cody.
“Yo,” he answered, and I rolled my eyes.
“Back-up turkeys needed. Gunner, Rock, and Apache are planning on frying them,” I said.
“Fried turkey. Gross,” Cody bitched.
“Get ordering, bro, or that’s what we’ll be having,” I replied.
I could see my brother wrinkling his nose in my imagination.
“On it. Watch out for the other’s organising food,” Cody warned, and I snorted as I hung up.
None of them had a clue. Jesus, this was turning into a Michaelsons, plus Grey, saves the day!
Ghost, Fish, Ezra, Mac, and Lowrider - Ghost’s POV
“Really, we’re meant to decorate the inside?” I demanded. This was not going my way.
“Yeah,” Lowrider replied, looking at the stack of boxes.
“I’ve never done Christmas here. What does it look like?” I asked.
“Christmas,” Fish said helpfully.
Fucker, that wasn’t helpful whatsoever.
“Call the prospects,” Mac whispered, peering around us.
“What?” Ezra murmured back.
“The prospects helped Jett, Hunter, Slate, and Blaze out with the toy lists. They also then saved Calamity, Klutz, and Gauntlet from decorating the entire outside. Although they let them stew for a full day first,” Mac explained with a frown as he, too, had spent a day outside lighting the sleigh path.
“Don’t ask the Hellions for help!” Fish exclaimed, alarmed.
“Hell no. Did you hear about the reindeer orgy and penguin gang bang?” Lowrider said and began laughing.
I shook my head. Their kids were not fuckin’ cute. The entire lot of them were home-grown terrorists. They all needed locking away in a detention centre and waterboarding. That or the government should hire them to deal with terrorist threats. The Hellions would enjoy that, I’m sure.
“Shit got crazy. Calamity, Klutz, and Gauntlet were out there till gone two in the morning fixing everything the Hellions did,” Ezra snickered.
“I don’t see how that’s cute,” I interjected, and my four brothers stared at me.
“Wait until you have kids. Then you’ll think shit’s funny,” Lowrider explained.
I doubted very much that would happen.
“Back to the prospects. Do you think they’ve got something lined up for the inside of the Hall?” I asked.
“Yup. And they’re collecting markers. I’ll call them,” Fish stated.
Twenty minutes later, Harley appeared in the entrance hall.
“Wow, you lot caved quick,” he said as he leaned against the stairs nonchalantly.
“How much?” I demanded.
Harley smirked.
“Well, we got a full day’s fun out of everyone before having to help. You guys are cheating us out of that,” Harley replied.
“Don’t push it, prospect,” Ezra warned.
Harley shrugged. “Dude, I win either way. I’m the one who knows who and where the decorators are, and Mom wants the Hall decorating in the next two days. You can give me all the scut you want, but remember, it will bite you in the ass.”
The smug little fucker.
“Wanna bet,” I growled out.
Harley grinned widely. “Yeah. Because if you give us scut, we won’t help anyone else out. We’ll all zip our lips and let you ruin Christmas, which is what you bunch of cavemen are going to do. And then when the others find out we helped some but nobody after you fucked with us, what do you think they’ll do?”
“You are way too much like your father,” Fish snapped, looking put out.
“That’s a compliment. And we’ll take three markers each from each of you.”
“Two,” Mac wrangled.
“Two and a bottle of that expensive shit we all drink. A bottle each, mind you,” Harley countered.
“Done!” Lowrider agreed before anyone could upset the cocky prospect.
My eyes narrowed on Harley. Payback was a bitch.
“I’ll phone the decorators to come in today,” Harley said and strode away.
“We just got played,” I complained.
“Yeah, but the kid was right. The others would make our lives a fuckin’ misery. And this gives me, Ezra, and Fish a chance to get the food ordered,” Lowrider drawled, looking relaxed.
“And I’ll call the tree guy to get him to deliver the smaller trees today. Mac and I will drag them about, and the prospects can damn well help,” I decided with a grin.
“Has anyone asked why the prospects are collecting markers?” Ezra suddenly questioned.
We all swapped worried glances.
“Shit!” I hissed as a sinking sensation hit my stomach. Whatever the prospects were up to, there was no doubt we were going to pay.
Calamity, Gauntlet, Klutz - Klutz’s POV
“What the hell is that?” I demanded, shocked.
“A wrapped present,” Calamity replied.
“The fuck it is,” Gauntlet said, chuckling.
Calamity studied it and sighed before laughing at himself.
“It looks like it’s gone through a custom drug check,” he admitted.
“No shit.” I chuckled.
“Does anyone have a clue how to wrap gifts?” Gauntlet asked, and Calamity and I shook our heads.
“Search it up on a video,” I suggested, and everyone offered me a dirty look. “That’s logical.”
“If we hand those presents out looking like that, the old ladies will slit our throat in our sleeps,” Calamity said.
I couldn’t disagree. Christmas was a serious thing for the women and kids. Not so much for us. Although we were starting to gain an understanding of what the old ladies did to give us all a decent Christmas.
“That wrapping is a disaster. Get on your phones,” I stated.
Four hours later, I was ready to launch every fuckin’ toy in sight through a window. I’d already had to stop Gauntlet from smashing them all up with a hammer.
“The Hellions are shits. Santa said they’ve all been naughty,” Calamity growled out.
I threw my latest attempt at wrapping a present down and crossed my arms.
“Drake can take my patch. I refuse to wrap anymore. I don’t get it, and I can’t do it,” I snarled, glaring at the action toys I’d now wrapped five times. In four hours, all we’d managed to wrap decently was six toys. Fuck that.
“Giving up?” Jared asked from the doorway.
“What will it cost?” I demanded.
“What?” Jared replied innocently.
“To wrap this fuckin’ lot up. I know you bastards have backup plans for everything. You gotta have one for wrapping this shit,” Calamity accused.
Jared shrugged. “Who do you think does Mom’s wrapping? She doesn’t have time to do it herself.”
“Jared,” Gauntlet growled out a warning.
“Another marker from each of the three of you for all the prospects,” Jared said quickly.
“What are you going to do with all these markers?” I asked suspiciously.
“That’s our business,” Jared retorted.
I swapped glances with the other two. Markers weren’t often given out, and the prospects were racking up a load. I didn’t dare imagine what they’d use them for.
“I could order you,” Gauntlet said viciously.
“You could. But it would backfire in a multitude of ways,” Jared replied calmly.
The prospects were too cocky. I’d make sure Drake assigned them to clean the toilets for six months.
“Done,” Calamity replied begrudgingly.
“Here. Call it. That’s the team Mom employs for shit like this. They love wrapping presents.” Jared handed over a number, and we all sighed. One nasty task down.
Wild, Cowboy, Ghost, Volcano, and Spike - Wild’s POV
“We are meant to put this up?” Volcano demanded.
“Yeah. It was delivered this morning, and Drake said we had to put it together,” I complained.
Ghost snorted as Cowboy and Spike swapped glances.
“We’re going to build a Santa’s grotto?” Cowboy questioned.
“Don’t ask me. Drake told me to get my ass here, so I did,” I bitched.
It was snowing heavily, and I didn’t want to be out here, but with only a few days left until Christmas, Drake had dumped this on us.
“Well, I suppose at least they put the stuff where Phoe wanted it fitted up,” Ghost said. “Because I have no clue how to plan a Santa’s village.”
“Stop complaining, and let’s get building. Do we have drills and shit?” Volcano griped. “I really don’t see why Pops and I have to do this.”
“Because as your pops is so fond of yelling, he’s a founder,” I retorted, and everybody glared at Spike.
“Why does that mean I have to be out here?” Spike snapped.
“Because Axel already bagged Santa. Which means you get to build his village,” I quipped, happy to make Spike unhappy. After all, if I had to be miserable, so did everyone else.
“Can we just get this shit done?” Ghost demanded.
“Sure. There are thirty buildings scattered around the Hall. There are twelve in the clearing where Santa’s home is. Drake’s put us on that and the prospects on the other eighteen. Let’s get some tools and bang this out,” Cowboy said.
I hated my little brother sometimes. He never seemed fazed by much, and by the small smile on his face, I knew he was thinking of Jemma. I couldn’t blame him; Lynda was never far from my mind. She was at work at the moment but would be home soon.
Lynda had been training another doctor to work by her side at the burns clinic she’d set up. The fact the technique worked on other damage and reduced scars was becoming more well-known, and Lynda was overworked. I was hoping this new doc would allow Lynda some time off because my wife was nothing if not dedicated to her patients.
We headed into the clearing, ignoring the snow, which seemed steady although still heavy. There, we found large piles placed in a semi-circle with a massive one in the middle. Clearly, that was Santa’s house.
“Split into two teams, and we can do this quicker,” Spike ordered, and we rolled our eyes, but nobody spoke up.
Cowboy and I approached the first pile. Basically, it was four sides with a roof to be screwed on. There were flower boxes, a chimney, fireplace, and some pieces of furniture that also needed setting up. I was rather surprised at how easily it went up. Mainly because everything was labelled to make it so that a five-year-old could build it. There was some wiring for lights that had a plug-in that fitted into a battery-operated socket box.
“Didn’t take long,” Cowboy said forty minutes later.
“No, for once, something was easy. Let’s get these others up,” I replied. It took us all morning and half the afternoon to fit up the twelve houses, and I had to admit, it looked pretty good. Night was falling, and the lights in the houses shone brilliantly, a welcoming beacon in the darkness.
“Turn them off, and let’s get some dinner,” Spike ordered.
“Not time yet,” Volcano retorted.
“There’ll be snacks. We need to kidnap that Mrs Ames. She’s a wonderful cook,” Spike muttered to Volcano.
“Phoe will kill you herself,” I interrupted cheerfully. It would take care of one problem.
“Shut it, you whippersnapper,” Spike snapped.
We all chuckled loudly as Spike glowered.
“What—what the hell, Pops?” Volcano stuttered as he laughed.
“That’s a good old-fashioned word. Learn some words other than fuck, cunt, and asshole,” Spike grumbled and stomped away.
“Fuckin’ whippersnapper,” I muttered as I followed him. “Heard it all now.”
Dante
“That fucker is real,” I whispered to EJ.
EJ shook his head. “Nuh-huh.”
“That thing moved,” I insisted.
EJ went to shake his head again, but I put him in a headlock and made him watch. At first, EJ struggled, and then his body completely stilled.
“Told you!” I hissed as the head swivelled towards us.
“Fuck!” EJ shrieked as Jake and Garrett crept up, with Scout and Timmy behind them.
“What are you doing?” Scout asked.
“Watch!” I snapped.
Moments later, the elf’s head moved again.
“No way,” Nashoba exclaimed, appearing.
“You all saw that? You know what that is, don’t you?” I demanded.
“Yeah, it’s the elf on the shelf. It checks we are being good,” Hawk said as he joined us.
“Nuh-huh. It means we’re being spied upon. Have anyone else noticed these have sprung up all around the Hall?” I asked.
Noah and Asher, Gunner’s five-year-old twins, arrived with a skid.
“You’re not gonna guess what we just saw!” Noah exclaimed.
“What?” I demanded, annoyed at being interrupted.
“Our elf on the shelf moved!” Asher declared, and I swapped glances with everyone.
“Told you. We’re being spied on!” I said.
Asher and Noah looked shocked.
“What’s going on?” EJ asked.
“I’m not sure, but I’m not having some creepy pervert watching me. We don’t know who put them there and why. We gotta collect them all up and burn them,” I suggested.
“But they work for Santa!” Noah cried, looking upset.
“Not these ones! These are bad elves. They’ve been sent to spy on us. We need to find them all and stop them in their evilness,” I explained.
Asher’s face got angry.
“Do you really think they’re wicked?” Timmy asked.
“Yes. Let’s find them all and put them in bags. We’ll meet back here,” I ordered. “We have to look after the younger children. These might even be spies here to steal Santa’s presents he’s bringing everyone.”
“No!” Scout said, horrified.
“I’ll get my dad to beat him up,” Nashoba agreed, looking fierce.
“My father will kick his ass,” Hawk added.
“Whose ass? We don’t know who’s behind it, but if we burn their spy shit, we win,” I stated.
My dad was president. I knew how to lead my men. And I was the Legacies next president. These were my brothers to protect. And I had to look after the Princesses. Even Eddie, although I did not like her.
But only I could torture my sister, no one else. Eddie was my rival, or she thought she was. Soon enough, she would realise I was cleverer, faster, and better than her. Eddie didn’t have a patch on me. I was her future president, and Eddie would respect and bow down to me. She’d have to do as I said when I took the title. Eddie was just a silly girl, and Peyton was the same.
“Let’s find these spies and burn them!” I exclaimed, and everyone ran off.
EJ came with me as we began checking everywhere.
Lots of minutes passed before we all met back up, and we had loads of these nasty spies.
“What do we do?” EJ asked.
I grinned.
“Outside. To the fire pit,” I said, and we fled through the Hall, somehow avoiding all adults.
“Dump them in there,” EJ ordered everyone as I headed to the shed.
Dad thought I didn’t know the code, but I did. I typed it in and yanked the door open. I looked around for a can of gas, found one, and raced back outside.
The Legacies had made a huge pyramid of the spies, and even now, they kept twisting their heads. I poured gas all over them and frowned. That might not be enough. EJ and I fetched three more cans before we thought we had soaked them properly.
“Anyone got matches?” Scout asked.
“I do!” Timmy answered.
“Where’d you get them from?” I demanded.
“I snuck back into the kitchen and snatched them from the drawer Mrs Ames keeps them in,” Timmy replied.
“Good man,” I said, giving him a nod of approval like Dad does.
“Whatever you are going to do! Don’t!” a voice came from an elf, and we shrieked.
“That’s my dad’s voice!” Nashoba shrieked. “They have stolen his spirit. They’re evil like my grandpa’s stories!”
Nashoba grabbed the matches and flicked one.
“Everyone get back!” I roared as Nashoba threw the match onto the elves.
“Burn you bastards!” I screamed as we all moved backwards.
There was a loud whoosh, and a huge flame shot into the air. As we lay on our backs in the snow, we watched open-mouthed as flames leapt into the sky. Screams came from inside the Hall as the spies or spirit stealers began to burn.
“Boys!” Uncle Ace yelled, appearing first.
“Dad!” Nashoba screamed and raced for his father. He jumped at Uncle Ace, crying, as he hugged him tightly.
“Those bad elves stole your voice. They were trying to steal your spirit like Grandpa warned us. We’re burning them, Dad, and they won’t ever hurt you again,” Nashoba told Uncle Ace.
Uncle Ace looked shocked. “What are you talking about?”
I stood up, pulling myself up as more adults appeared. Calmly, I held up my hands.
“It’s okay, I saved us all,” I said as the flames remained high. “Those elves were spying on us. We saw them move and realised they were bad. We found them and burned them all. They won’t steal anyone’s spirit again. But that was a close call, Uncle Ace.”
Our fathers mouth’s opened and shut. All of them looked disbelieving. The Legacies pulled ourselves up. We’d saved everyone.
“Elf on the fucking shelf! No!” Mom screamed suddenly. “I’m gonna kill you fuckers. I said moving elves would freak somebody out! They more than freaked the fuck out! The little bastards have set a bonfire going and could seriously have hurt someone.”
“Mom?” I asked, confused. She turned to me and gave me one of her ‘Mom’ looks. Uh oh. I was in trouble.
“This isn’t on you, Dante,” Mom replied, and I relaxed. “Although burning them and breaking into the shed is. Those were genuine elves, but your fathers thought moving ones would be cool. Clearly not.”
“Oh no,” Asher said. “We just killed Santa’s real helpers!”
I stared, stunned, at my mother as all the little kids started crying. Our dads all winced.
“We murdered the elves!” Nashoba shrieked, and his bottom lip began trembling.
“You can all explain and deal with this!” Mom snarled and stormed back inside with the other moms.
Shit, I’d killed Santa’s helpers. Without warning, I burst into tears and wondered if I was going to get any presents this year!