Chapter 30
CHAPTER 30
“ A re you still ignoring me?” Nick asked, glancing at Jamie as he came to a stop at a four-way intersection.
“I’m not ignoring you, Nick. I’m trying to get this book edited before tomorrow,” Jamie said, not bothering to look up from the computer that she was balancing on her knees. He might be new to this, but it didn’t exactly take a genius to figure out what was wrong with his little recluse.
She was pissed and for good reason. He’d screwed up. Thanks to him, someone managed to take what should have been a private moment and shared it with the world. As he pulled onto his street, he idly wondered how Edward and Dana handled everything after it happened to them. If anyone knew how to handle a bullshit situation like this, it would be Edward and Dana.
“Do you want to grab something to eat?” Nick asked, slowing down before he reached his house.
“If it’s okay with you, I’d rather just call it a night,” Jamie said, not bothering to look up from her computer.
“That’s fine,” Nick said, deciding that they’d take it easy tonight since he was most likely going to be fired tomorrow.
He couldn’t believe just how badly he’d fucked up.
It was his job to keep her safe and he just…
He should have protected her.
Now, he needed to clean up this mess and make sure that she was taken care of before they fired him. Rerum Publishing wasn’t going to be happy, but then again, he didn’t give a flying fuck. He needed to keep his little recluse safe and he wasn’t about to let them put her in danger for a fucking book tour.
“Is this it?” Jamie asked, finally looking up from her computer.
“This is it,” Nick said, putting the car in park before turning the engine off.
“Thank you for the ride, Nick. I really appreciate it, but you don’t have to stick around,” Jamie said, taking him by surprise as she placed her computer in her bag as she shifted nervously next to him.
“You don’t want me to stick around?” Nick asked as he watched her closely, noting the way that she avoided looking at him as she absently toyed with the zipper on her backpack.
“I think that might be for the best,” Jamie said softly as she stared down at her bag.
“So, that’s it?” Nick asked as he sat there, releasing a humorless chuckle.
“The tour’s over,” Jamie said, shrugging it off like it was no big deal.
“I see,” Nick said evenly as he climbed out of his car and slammed the door shut. He couldn’t fucking believe this. He was giving up everything for this woman and she was giving him the brush-off?
It wasn’t fucking happening.
He grabbed their things from the trunk before slamming it shut and stalking towards the bottom level of his three-story house. He unlocked the door and quickly disarmed the alarm. His little recluse reluctantly followed and looked around the garage only to frown in confusion when she spotted the black Mustang and line of motorcycles parked against the wall.
“This way,” Nick said, shutting the garage door and resetting the alarm before he made his way upstairs.
He dropped their bags on the floor as he made his way through the living room and headed towards the kitchen. He grabbed an ice-cold beer out of the fridge, popped the top, and leaned back as he watched his little recluse stop in the middle of the living room and slowly looked around.
“Am I renting someone’s house while they’re away?” Jamie asked, sounding so damn hopeful.
“Nope,” Nick said, letting the word pop as he watched her.
“This is your house, isn’t it?” Jamie asked, looking anywhere but at him.
“Mmmhmm,” Nick said, taking another sip.
“Is there perhaps a chance that we’re only stopping here on the way to my new place?”
“Not a chance in hell,” Nick said, watching her.
“Oh,” Jamie mumbled, her shoulders dropping in defeat.
“Awkward, huh?” Nick asked as he felt a muscle in his jaw clench.
“You could say that,” Jamie mumbled hollowly.
“We had to move you out of your apartment quickly. We stored your stuff here and planned to have a place set up for you by the time we got back, but we had to cut the tour short. We don’t have a place set up for you yet,” Nick explained before taking another sip of his beer, his eyes never leaving her.
“Oh,” she mumbled weakly.
“Since I live alone, I thought I’d let my girlfriend stay with me, but it seems that she just dumped my ass not even ten minutes ago, so now we’re stuck in a very awkward situation,” Nick said, placing his beer on the counter before he crossed his arms over his chest and glared at her.
“Is there any chance that you’d be willing to give me a ride to the nearest hotel for the night?” Jamie asked, sounding really fucking hopeful.
“You’re staying here until this asshole is caught,” Nick bit out.
“I can take care of myself,” Jamie said with a firm nod that had his eyes narrowing.
“No,” he simply said, pushing away from the counter and made his way back into the living room.
“What do you mean ‘no’?” Jamie demanded as he grabbed her bags and made his way upstairs. He didn’t have to look back to know that she was following him. For a moment, he considered putting her in the guest room only to decide against it and made his way to his room, where he found her boxes stacked neatly against the wall.
“You didn’t answer me,” Jamie pointed out as he placed her bags by the door.
“And I’m not going to. You’re staying here and that’s final,” Nick said, refusing to take any chances.
“That’s not your decision,” she snapped, pissing him off.
“Yes, it is,” Nick said more calmly than he felt as he headed for the door. “This is your room while you’re here. Make yourself comfortable.”
“I’m not staying, Nick,” Jamie said firmly.
“Yes, you are, Jamie. If you try to leave, I’ll just drag your cute little ass right back here.”
“Are you seriously threatening to kidnap me?” she asked, looking absolutely fucking lost as she swallowed hard.
“Call it whatever you want, Jamie, but you’re not going anywhere right now,” Nick said, heading for the door only to have his little recluse quickly move to cut him off.
When he moved to step past her, Jamie held up her hands in a playacting motion. “Look, I appreciate your concern. I really do, but I can’t stay here. I just can’t. So, if you could just tell me where my car is, I can call a taxi and make arrangements to have my things moved, and then, I’ll never bother you again.”
“No,” Nick said firmly, once again moving to walk past her, but the damn woman wasn’t having it. It actually surprised him that she wasn’t backing down.
“I really need to leave, Nick. Please just-”
Something in him snapped. While he couldn’t get enough of her, she wanted nothing to do with him. Worse, she couldn’t seem to get away from him fast enough. He moved forward, crowding her until she had no choice but to back up. When her back hit the wall, Nick caged her in by slapping his palms against the wall as he leaned down.
“Why?”
“Why what?” Jamie asked, licking her lips nervously as her gaze flickered towards the door.
“Why the hell are you so eager to get away from me, Jamie? Tell me exactly what I did to set this off,” Nick demanded as he pressed his forehead against hers and closed his eyes.
“You didn’t do anything, Nick. It was just time. Please just let me go,” Jamie said, putting her hands on his shoulders, moving to push him away only to hold onto him tightly.
“Why the hell are you doing this to me?” Nick whispered hoarsely as his hands clenched tightly into fists.
“I’m not doing anything to you. I-”
“Bullshit!” Nick snapped, slamming his fists against the wall, damaging the drywall and scaring the hell out of his little recluse.
“I’m not doing anything to you!”
“Yes, you are!” Nick snapped, opening his eyes so that he could glare down at her.
“What exactly am I doing to you? You’re the one who decided that this wasn’t going to continue past the tour. It ended early and so did we. I accepted it, so why can’t you?”
“Because I fucking love you!” Nick shouted.
As soon as the words were out, he wanted to take them back. He opened his mouth to do just that, but he realized that he couldn’t. He loved her. He was head over heels in love with this woman and he knew that it was pointless to deny it. Where other women had failed, his little recluse had not only succeeded in bringing him to his knees, but once he was down, she’d fucking destroyed him.
This hurt so fucking bad, Nick thought as he struggled for control. She didn’t love him, didn’t want him. She wasn’t the pathetic one, he was. He’d only loved two women in his life and they both broke his fucking heart, first his mother and now Jamie.
He didn’t want to love her, Nick thought bitterly as he reached for her and how fucked up was that? He knew that she didn’t love him, but he couldn’t help but hope, pray, that she cared enough to put him out of his fucking misery.
“No, you don’t!” she cried, shoving him away.
“Yes, I do!” Nick shouted, reaching for her again only to have her weakly slap his hands away.
“You can’t!”
“Why the hell not?” he demanded.
“Because you’ll get yourself killed, you jackass!” Jamie shouted back.
“What did you just say?” Nick asked, stepping in front of her when she tried to leave.
“Nothing,” she mumbled, trying to get past him, but he refused to move.
“It didn’t sound like nothing to me, Jamie. What the hell did you say?” Nick demanded, not allowing himself to hope that maybe, just maybe, she loved him.
“Please just let me go, Nick.”
Let her go? There was no way in hell that he was going to let her go. Not now. Not when there was a possibility that for once, someone loved him back. She folded her arms over her chest defensively and turned away from him.
“Tell me that you don’t care about me, Jamie, and you can go,” he said softly as he stepped up behind her.
“I don’t!” she cried, but he didn’t believe her.
“You’re lying,” Nick said tightly, keeping his voice low as he somehow resisted the urge to take her into his arms and fucking beg her to say the words.
“No, I’m not, Nick. We’re over. I don’t care about you and I never want to see you again,” Jamie said, her voice breaking as she reached up and frantically wiped her eyes.
“Look me in the eye and say that,” Nick said, praying like hell that he wasn’t wrong. He couldn’t be wrong, not about her. She was his little recluse, his sweet Jamie and he knew that she loved him.
Slowly, so damn slowly that he thought his legs were about to give out, she turned around. When she looked up at him and didn’t quite meet his eyes, he had his answer.
“I don’t love you, Nick. Please just let me go,” Jamie said, keeping her gaze averted as her chin trembled while she struggled to hold back the tears that he knew were coming.
“Liar,” Nick said softly as he reached over and gently cupped her face in his hands.
“No, I’m not!” Jamie cried as tears began to stream down her beautiful face. She tried to step away from him, but he refused to let her go. He was done playing this game and wanted to know why she was so damn willing to break his heart.
“Look me in the eye, Jamie, and tell me that you don’t love me,” Nick demanded softly as he carefully wiped her tears away with the pads of his thumbs.
“I did,” she mumbled, sounding absolutely miserable.
“No, you didn’t, baby. Look me in the eye and tell me that you don’t love me and I will let you go, Jamie,” he promised, knowing that it would probably kill him.
Beautiful, glimmering, caramel eyes looked up and locked with his. He watched her mouth work soundlessly for several seconds before finally closing as she let her shoulders drop in defeat.
“If you can’t tell me that you don’t love me, then why don’t you tell me why you’re willing to lie to me, Jamie?” Nick said, leaning down and kissed her forehead. “Tell me why you’re willing to break my heart.”
Instead of answering him, Jamie shook her head, but thankfully, didn’t try to push him away. He dropped his hands, and without a word, swept her up into his arms and carried her downstairs. When she still didn’t speak, he started to become a little nervous. He sat down on the leather loveseat and adjusted her in his arms until she was straddling his lap. Once he was done, he took both of her trembling hands in his and pressed a kiss against each palm.
“Are you upset about the video?” Nick asked, feeling like an idiot. Of course, she was up about the video, but he didn’t know if that was the reason why she was pulling away from him. “If I’d known that someone was there, I-”
“It’s not the video,” she whispered.
“Then, what is it?”
“I shouldn’t be around you.”
“Why? Because I’m a bad influence?” he asked teasingly, hoping to get her to smile. When her lips twitched, he damn near sighed with relief.
“Because of the threat. If you’re around me, you’ll get hurt.”
“And you don’t want me to get hurt?” Nick asked, watching the way that she hesitated before shaking her head. “Because you love me?”
“Maybe,” she mumbled, pulling her hands free so that she could play with one of the buttons on his shirt.
“And you thought by pushing me away that you were protecting me,” Nick guessed.
“It was the only way,” she mumbled with a helpless shrug.
“I see,” Nick murmured absently, wondering if he should just spank her ass now or cut off her chocolate supply. It was his job to protect her and he really didn’t appreciate the interference. It was sweet that she tried to protect him, but really, the woman needed to let him do his damn job, Nick decided with a heartfelt sigh as he made his choice and decided to make sure the little pain in his ass knew exactly how much he loved her.