Chapter 38
“The Briar I knew in The Gales would have agreed to do it,” Kressa says, slamming the door. She turns the lock to her quarters with so much force the knob shudders. “The woman I knew two weeks ago was selfless and did anything to help those who needed it—even if it risked her life.”
“The Kressa I knew two weeks ago promised she’d never think any different of me. She claimed she wanted nothing more for me than my freedom.” I bare my teeth. “Then she put me in cuffs.”
Kressa scoffs, shaking her head. “Is that what this is, then? You refused to do it because you’re angry with me for breaking a promise? And this is your way of getting back?”
“I refused because tens of thousands of people rely on me to make it back to Delterran alive. It’s not that I don’t care about all those people within the mountain, but I have to make sacrifices to ensure my own court remains safe. Just like you do.”
Her gaze bores into me, hands flexing at her sides. “Have you taken a single moment to consider that if I did what it took to keep my court safe, you’d already be dead.”
I step forward and narrow my eyes. “Likewise.”
She clicks her tongue, staring at me down the bridge of her nose. “How aggravating it must be, to know I can’t die by your hand.”
“You say that as if I won’t try again.”
The corner of her lip quirks. “I’d be disappointed if you didn’t.”
Anger coils in my stomach, slipping between the gaps in my ribs.
But it doesn’t come from down the bond. No, this is the pure, unfiltered rage roiling through my body when I take off the gloves.
But right now, with the rhodium coating my palms, it’s sated.
At bay—barely. My lip curls back, and I bare my teeth.
“You want to know what’s so aggravating about you? ”
Her gaze falls to my lips, and her chest deflates. “That I hate myself. I hate myself for wanting you so badly.”
My lips part. “What?”
She steps closer, her feet padding across the floor as she joins me in the center of the living room.
“What’s so aggravating is I loathe everything you’ve done—everything you stand for.
” Lifting her hand, she pinches my chin between her fingers.
“And yet, I’d find a way to steal the sun from the sky if you so much as mentioned loving the stars. ”
I shake my head. “It’s just the bond that makes you feel like this. You don’t really—”
“I’ve loved you from the moment I laid eyes on you. When I watched you hand over a pouch of stolen jewels to that pirate, I saw something I never found in myself.”
My heart thumps, and the air between our lips takes on a charge—thick like syrup.
“What’s that?” I breathe.
“Courage.”
I tilt my head, pulling out of her hold. “But you joined The Gales. You risked your life returning to Sarenia and finding Elias. You can’t do that without courage.”
She sucks in a cheek and twists a finger around a lock of my hair. “I was raised to obey. Those were things I was ordered to do—find my brother and capture you. It wasn’t some act of courage that led me to do those things.” She swallows. “It was the blind submission.”
A sour taste fills my mouth. That would explain her reaction to her arranged marriage—the way she shrunk into a smaller version of herself when he loomed over her.
“There are things you should know,” she whispers. She settles her gaze at the curve of my shoulder, as if she’s too ashamed to look me in the eye. “Things I should have told you.”
I cup her face in my hands and force her to look at me. “Not right now.”
She nods, leaning into my touch. There’s a heaviness to her expression, but I hold her gaze as I trail my thumb over the scar I gifted her.
“You are the most courageous person I know,” I whisper, biting the glove of my right hand.
I pull it off with my teeth and let it drop to the floor as I weave my bare fingers into the hair at her temple.
“I’ve watched you look death in the eye and face it head on.
You’ve selflessly set aside everything you want in the name of duty.
You have the weight of the world on your shoulders.
” Warmth floods the bond, and I pull her closer, until our chests press together. “Let me hold some of it for you.”
She lifts my other hand and eases the glove off. “I want to give you the world, love, not just let you hold it.”
My mouth goes dry, and I watch as she pulls her lip between her bottom teeth. Without the rhodium, the sensation runs down the bond—as if it’s my lip she’s dragging her teeth over.
“It’s getting stronger,” I breathe.
“I’m well aware.”
“I can feel what you’re feeling.”
“Can you feel how bad I want you?” Her pupils widen. “That if it were up to me, no one would enter this room for days, and we wouldn’t leave?”
Heat twists my core, tightening like a bolt—the weight of her desire flaring deep within me.
I wet my lip. “It’s one thing to feel it, but entirely different to show me.”
She quirks her lip and pulls away, holding my hand as she steps backward toward her bedroom. “You do control your power much better after we share a kiss. Perhaps we should see what it’s like when there’s more?”
I’m breathless as I follow, hypnotized by the way her body sways as she walks. The way her hair shifts around her face with each step. Her eyes hold mine in a dare.
“An experiment,” I whisper. “Plus, it would help ease the pain you endure.”
She gives me a drunken smile. “All these excuses, Briar. If you won’t, I’ll be the first to admit that I wake up every morning craving the taste of you on my tongue. Each time I look at you, I have to stop myself from reliving the feel of your body beneath mine. Your skin under my touch.”
Warmth coils in the space behind my navel, and she pauses in front of her bedroom door. I lift a brow and reach for the doorknob, but she captures my wrist in hers.
Before I can react, she shoves my front against the knotted wood and presses her body flush against my back.
She brushes my hair off my nape and hovers her lips over the shell of my ear.
“Every night I’ve touched myself while thinking of you.
” Her hand trails over my side and dips beneath my shirt, weaving around to my front.
She presses her palm flat against my stomach.
“But no matter how hard I try, I can’t replicate the way you sound as you scream my name. ”
My body turns molten—liquid heat. I lean my head back against her shoulder as her hand drags up the front of my abdomen in a slow, tortuous line. Her knuckles brush the bottom swell of my breasts, and I pull in a sharp rush of air.
Her fingers tease the area around my nipple, and I arch into her, begging for more.
She smiles into the crook of my neck. “So eager.”
“Touch me, Kressa.”
Her hips press into me, and her other hand wraps around my lower stomach, holding me tight against her. She makes another slow sweep across my breast, narrowly missing my nipple. “Ask nicely, love.”
A shiver runs down my spine, and I sigh as I press into her mind. Touch me, please.
Much better. She hums against my skin and inches her hand higher. You sound so pretty when you’re needy.
I piece together a comeback, but before the thought has a chance to leave my mind, she pinches my nipple between her thumb and forefinger.
A low groan passes between my lips, and an ache spreads through my core.
She dips her face against my shoulder, planting kisses along the bare skin along my collar.
Heat pools low in my stomach as her other hand joins the first—each working my nipples until they harden. I let out a moan and rest my forehead against the door.
She weaves her fingers into my hair and pulls my head back.
I want to see you, she breathes into my mind.
My thighs clench, but it does nothing to staunch the growing ache. I twist my head, and as our gazes lock, the air leaves my lungs. Molten flecks of gold churn in her irises—her lids heavy.
I trail my fingers down her forearm and grab her wrist, pressing her hand to my chest. Don’t stop.
Heat and want and blazing need shoot down the bond, leaving me gasping as she cups my breasts with both hands.
I can feel everything I’m doing to you, she says, pressing me further against the door as she captures my nipples between her fingers.
My eyes flutter shut, and I snake my hand down my front, dragging it under the band of my pants. Can you feel that?
She shifts and hums against my skin. Her hands trail farther up my shirt, over my collarbone and reaching toward my throat.
I dip my fingers beneath my waistline, and her breath stutters in my ear. Heat clouds my thoughts, and I hover my finger over my clit, not enough to put pressure but enough to acknowledge its presence.
Kressa stops breathing, and her fingers pause at my throat—thumb pressed against my artery.
Say please, I whisper.
She disappears from my back. I whirl around, but she reaches behind me and throws open her bedroom door. Heat radiates off her in waves, and she lunges forward, grabbing my face in her hands.
Our lips clash—our kisses starved and frantic as she pushes me backwards into the room. The backs of my knees hit the mattress, and she guides me to a seat, tilting my head back as she eases my thighs apart.
She steps between my legs and pulls my bottom lip between her teeth.
I groan into her mouth and slide my hands beneath the hem of her shirt, dragging my fingertips down the skin of her waist.
She breaks the kiss, her chest heaving. “Show me how you like to be touched, my love. Let me feel it.”
I look up at her through my lashes, and my lip quirks at the edge. “By all means.”
Pushing myself farther onto the mattress, I bend my knees and prop my heels on the edge of the bed. She steps forward and leans over me, grabbing my waistband. I lift my hips, and she slides the pants and underwear off, leaving me in nothing but the sea-battered tunic falling off my left shoulder.
She drops my clothes to the floor.
A breath heaves from her chest as her gaze roams over me—tracing each line and curve of my skin. “You’re beautiful.”