Chapter 40
The mattress sinks down beside me, and I edge closer, seeking the sudden warmth. Sleep holds tight—pinning my mind into place. With my eyes closed, I reach out, and brush the soft skin of a bare arm. I sigh out a long breath, and inch closer to Kressa.
Fingertips brush my hair out of my face. “Oh, my Briar.”
My eyes shoot open, to where Isolde lies beside me—her hair wild around her pale face. Dusty, early dawn light filters through the hairline gap in the curtain, but it’s enough to draw a line across her face—catch on her near-white eyes.
“Isolde,” I breathe.
And for a moment, it’s as if I’m somewhere else—somewhere far from Ignata. In a world where she hasn’t broken into my prison cell and we aren’t two queens on the brink of losing our courts.
Here, we’re two women sharing a bed in the small hours of the morning, wishing it could stretch far into the day.
She traces my cheekbone. “In all the years I’ve spent loving you, I’ve never witnessed you in the moments when you’re waking up in the morning. Beyond short naps on a picnic blanket in the garden, I’ve never seen how peaceful your face is when you’re asleep.”
I push onto my elbows, my hair hanging wildly around my collarbones. “How are you here?” Rubbing the sleep from my eyes, I study the doorway, but no footsteps make their way closer. “How did you get in without being caught?”
A breeze whips through the room, and the curtains shift, revealing the window pushed completely open. I shift forward on the bed and blink hard. I’ve tried every day, and never managed to get it open more than a handful of inches.
She must have used her power, or some sort of tool to pry it open.
“The best part of having my power again.” She fans her fingers slowly, and the curtains billow, just enough to make out the grey haze outside. “I coated the city in a thick layer of fog. Even if the guards were watching the sky—which they weren’t at this hour—they’d never see me.”
A smile pulls at my lips as I tuck a strand of hair behind her ear. My fingers brush over the scar I gave her, and my chest tightens. Another casualty from the recklessness of my anger. “And your fleet? The falcons? They aren’t close enough to get caught, are they?”
She pushes herself up and leans against the headboard. “There is no fleet. Or falcons. Not under my order, anyway.”
My stomach pitches. “What are you talking about? You said they were ready, and—”
“They were. I had an entire armada at my disposal, until Kressa caught the castle on fire.” She grinds her teeth together and closes her hand into a fist against the mattress.
“Callum blames me for not being able to put the blaze out, and in an effort to try and find the culprit, he discovered the forces I had been hiding. He tortured one of them, until they told him it was me who kept them employed.” Tears threaten her eyes as she faces me.
“I didn’t come here early because I had forces ready.
I came here because he ordered my execution, and this was the only place I knew I’d be safe from him. ”
A sour taste fills my mouth. Without the distraction of a full-scale attack, Isolde and I don’t stand a chance at breaking out my crew unnoticed.
And even if we managed to, there’s no way to escape.
I have no idea if the ship we sailed to Sarenia is still bobbing on the outskirts of Ignata.
It would be a fool’s errand to try. A death sentence.
“I was under the impression you were being held prisoner by Kressa.” She studies the room, then pinches the sheets between her fingers, rubbing at the fabric. “But this is no prison.”
“You know as well as I do that some prisons don’t come with bars.”
She presses her lips into a thin line and nods, but her fingers skim over my gloves. “No shackles though?”
“They’re rhodium.”
Her brows pull together. “And you keep them on by choice? A prison of your own choosing?”
I blink at my gloves and turn my hands over, staring at my covered palms. “It’s complicated.”
A weighted silence blankets the room. She presses her tongue into her cheek and shakes her head.
“What’s complicated is selling your power to a man who promises to do good.
If it were up to me, I would have stolen it back—no hesitation.
” Her eyes find mine. “She might not be siphoning your power, but by complying, you’re letting her control it. ”
My stomach churns—the foreign material weighing down my hands. There have been times where I’ve been tempted to rip them off, but Isolde has no idea I can channel Kressa’s fire through the bond. I can’t give her the option of thinking I was the one who lit the castle on fire.
Her words chip at my thoughts though. Since we left Sarenia, everything Kressa’s done has been to control me. But I can’t let Isolde believe I’m so easily swayed into compliance. She needs a reason as to why I stifle my power.
I fold my hands together. “I keep them on because there’s a mind reader here.”
Her eyes burst wide. “A mind reader? Who?”
Elias’s name balances off the tip of my tongue, but I tether it to the roof of my mouth.
If I were to so much as breathe his name, he’d be a target.
And after everything Kressa and I did to get him back, that’s not something I’m willing to do.
I shake my head. “I have no idea, but that’s why I keep the gloves on.
It keeps him from reading my thoughts and discovering our correspondence. ”
Isolde studies me. “Him?”
I swallow. “Only guessing. It could just as easily be a woman. In all honesty, I’m kept entirely in the dark about the Earth Court’s political moves.”
“Very well. And where is Kressa now?” She lifts a brow. “Did you find your compass?”
My tongue turns to cotton, but I bite the flesh of my cheek and shrug. “I’m locked in here. I’ve tried to escape, and no matter how hard I’ve tried, there’s no way out.”
She stares at the doorway, and pushes off the covers.
If Kressa returned, I can’t have her hearing Isolde’s footsteps and discovering I’m not alone. I wrap my hand around Isolde’s wrist and pull her close.
Her grip on the mattress falters, and her hair brushes off her shoulders as she falls against me—our legs tangling. We share a stifled laugh, and her breath wafts over my neck, sending goosebumps in its wake.
A smile pulls at my lips, and I twist one of her curls around my finger. “I’ve missed you.”
“Oh, have you?”
I nod. “The days where it was just us were simpler. Easier. Yes, we had Caelus to worry about, but in the decade we spent together, I was happy. Because of you.”
My words ring true, and the space behind my eyes stings. The love I shared with her was just as genuine as the betrayal I left her with.
She inches closer and lays her head against my chest. Her chest expands on a deep inhale, then her body goes stiff. Pulling away, she twists toward me and sucks in a cheek. “You don’t smell the same.”
I quirk a lip, watching her from the corner of my eyes. “And how did I used to smell?”
Leaning forward, she brushes the space beneath my earlobe with her lips. “Like me.”
A shiver works its way down my spine, and my gaze drops to her mouth, mesmerized as they curve at the edges. The deep bow in her upper lip.
We’ve wrong each other in every way possible. And still, my motives behind corresponding with her are selfish—a means to get my crew and me to freedom. But she means something to me, and there are memories that aren’t so easily erased.
She cups my face. “In every lifetime, I’d still choose you. And when this is through and the continent finds peace, you won’t go a day without being mine.”
The air thickens between us—buzzing with unsaid words. We’ve caused each other so much pain, such hurt, and yet, I can’t pull myself away. Her bottom lip brushes mine, and my breath hitches.
Heat blooms in my chest, and I pull in a deep breath laced with lavender and fresh air carrying the promise of spring. It wouldn’t take much to let myself fall into her. But within minutes, the castle will wake. Any second, a servant could walk through my door.
An ache spreads across my chest. “You aren’t safe here. Not in the castle.”
“I’m not staying.” She pulls back, and gathers her hair into a bun at her nape. “I must get going before the sun burns off my fog.”
“But where are you going to go?”
She shrugs. “Most of my people lost respect for me when I handed my power over to Caelus. So it’ll be hard to find those who will bow to me, but I’m going to try.
” Swinging her legs off the bed, she pushes to her feet and strides to the window.
“And I have other matters to take care of before then.”
“Like what?”
“Like bringing you your ship.” Her lip quirks, and she props herself on the windowsill as a caw echoes through the air. “I know exactly where The Twelfth Night is, and I’m going to get it back for you.”
My body freezes—rooted to the spot. Before I have a chance to ask her its location, or when to expect her back, she disappears into the thick fog.