5. Sebastian #2
“Someone confident who knows he’s good-looking.
” Lily shrugged again, staring at her feet.
“Sierra’s like you. Even Maddie, to an extent.
But more people are like me. Uncertain of themselves.
Awkward.” She winced. “We don’t find social interactions as easy as some people.
It’s an effort. And we kick ourselves for saying stupid things and get anxious about certain social situations, including dating.
I represent everyone like me, and I think having someone like me talk openly and vulnerably about what it’s like to be a shy dater helps people feel seen.
Also, the girls have helped me, given me great advice, and it’s wonderful to be able to share whether that advice works for my personality type or how I’ve tweaked it to suit me.
Listeners have really responded to that.
And when we get call-ins or emails thanking me for helping them find love or ask out their crush … it makes being vulnerable worthwhile.”
I swallowed hard, my heart pounding loudly in my ears for reasons I didn’t quite understand. “You’re a really good person, Lily.”
Her dimples flashed as she shyly looked me in the eye. “You’re full of compliments today.”
For a moment, I forgot what I’d promised myself. That Lily was off-limits. Friend-zoned. It was easy to forget when she was the most beautiful woman I’d ever seen, and I suddenly found myself desperate to know what her moans of pleasure sounded like.
My skin flushed hot. All rational thought fled my mind and there was nothing more important than learning how soft Lily Sawyer’s plush mouth really was.
I bent my head toward her and at the hitch of her breath, my balls tightened.
“If you aren’t going to use the study room, should I give it to someone else?” A voice had Lily jerking away from me with a squeak of surprise.
Irritated, I blinked out of my sexual fog and turned to find a woman standing in the middle of the aisle.
A woman I recognized.
Bloody hell, it was Lily’s mother.
I straightened and turned.
“Mum.” Lily pushed off the bookshelves, her eyes wide with embarrassment. “I was just grabbing a book before we used the study room.”
I’d never met Olivia Sawyer, the head librarian.
I’d seen her around and heard some of the blokes making crass, sexist jokes about her being a MILF.
She’d given Lily her coloring, including the hazel eyes.
However, she was much curvier than Lily, a little taller, and if I was being honest, a little plainer in the face.
She didn’t look old enough to be Lily’s mum.
“Sebastian Thorne.” I held out a hand to her, feeling grateful she’d interrupted, even if Lily was embarrassed by it. For a moment, I’d let my cock do the thinking. Lily deserved better than a casual fling.
“Olivia.” Lily’s mum shook my hand with a mischievous grin. The woman had a glamorous smile that transformed her from merely pretty to stunning. “I’m Lily’s mother as well as head librarian here. What are your intentions with my daughter?” She had a mixed accent. American with Scottish inflection.
I laughed at her forwardness as Lily squealed, “Mum!”
Olivia hushed her but was still smiling. “This is still a library, Lil.” She held out her hand to her daughter. “I’m going to need that key back. I’ve kicked couples out of the study rooms too many times to count, and my kid is not going to be one of them.”
“Kill me.” Lily closed her eyes. “Please kill me now.”
“After I get that key.”
“I assure you nothing untoward was about to occur,” I interjected.
“I’m still going to need that key.”
Groaning with pure mortification, Lily handed it over. “Nothing happened.”
“And now nothing will.” Olivia thumbed over her shoulder. “You can use the cubicles on the second floor. The ones out in the open for everyone to see.”
I snorted. Lily’s mum was funny.
“You do realize I’m almost twenty-two,” Lily hissed at her as we all turned to walk down the aisle.
“I do. But you do realize I’m the head librarian and I can’t condone sexual activity in the library … even though it’s an uphill battle.”
“There was no—ugh, you’re so embarrassing. Come on, Sebastian.” Lily stomped away.
“Nice to meet you,” I said to Olivia as I passed. Lily was out of earshot now. “Really, truly, nothing is happening. We’re just friends.”
“I remember a male friend of mine looking at me the way I caught you looking at my daughter.”
“Oh?”
She grinned and waved her ring finger. “He married me.” With a chuckle, she sauntered off in the opposite direction, her heels clicking on the hardwood floor.
Biting my lip, I turned back to search for Lily. Hurrying after her, a different kind of guilt clouded my mind. I didn’t want to lead Lily on and that’s exactly what I’d done. Shit.
I had to fix this.
All of it.
I knew I had to tell Harry and Olly we needed to back off the girls’ podcast. Olly had started winding the girls up, trying to make it a competition between the shows to get a rise out of Sierra.
He said it was only for fun, but I had a feeling Olly had really liked Sierra and his ego was badly bruised by her lack of interest in taking their relationship further.
Sierra didn’t know it was Olly behind Potterrow Blokes , which seemed to piss him off even more that she didn’t recognize his voice.
But the joke had gone far enough.
Lily and her friends didn’t find the interference funny.
And it wasn’t.
It was immature.
I was done with it.
As for Lily …
First, I had to quit the podcast. I’d promised Harry I’d do tomorrow’s show, and I would. But after that, I quit.
And then next time … next time Lily and I met, I’d tell her the truth. Everything. Hopefully, she’d forgive me long enough to want to stay in my life. As a friend. Only as a friend.