Chapter Twenty-Four
James
I don’t know what the fuck I’m doing. This wasn’t part of the plan.
I swore years ago that I wouldn’t get involved with another girl. Quick fucks, sure. Everyone needs release and the occasional physical connection.
But this? This is completely different.
Dangerous.
But fuck, I can’t stop. Just the thought of cutting Sadie off again, of not hearing her stupid references or seeing her smile or feeling her soft skin burn under my touch, makes me want to submerge myself in boiling oil.
I’d rather rip out my tongue than never taste her again.
All five of my senses were made to consume every aspect of Sadie Oliver.
And goddamn, this is so much worse than being involved. This is an obsession of epic proportions. I’m well and truly fucked. Trapped and being slowly devoured by the most gorgeous woman alive.
It’s ridiculous. I want to say it came out of nowhere, but I’m losing the ability to lie to myself. This has been growing since the first time I saw her in June’s house.
And now I’m sending her dirty texts while I’m surrounded by the club, wishing I could be with her instead of leading Ace back to Theo’s office at the Iron Cage, and thinking about her when I should be listening to Ace tell us about a solid Fiver lead.
Something about two Fivers setting up a meeting with some guys in the international skin trade.
“Seriously?” Theo spits. “Just when I thought they couldn’t get any worse.”
I silently agree. If this is true, they’re about to make a deal with the worst kind of people.
Those monsters pretend to help immigrants from Mexico cross the border just to separate the families and sell them to the highest bidders.
The men sometimes get sold to do manual labor, but they usually get shot and left in the desert.
It’s the women and children who really bring in the cash.
Just the thought makes bile rise in my throat. Any lingering pleasure from thinking about Sadie vanishes.
“Only two Fivers are going to be there?” I ask.
“I think,” Ace says.
“Maybe they’re going rogue,” I suggest.
“If that’s the case, then I think we should be there. Bring those two back with us. If they’re sick enough to deal in the skin trade, then I have no qualms using them to get information,” Theo says.
I nod. “Agreed.”
“You’re sure this has nothing to do with their drug dealings or other business dealings in the skin trade?” Theo asks. “They’ve had their hands in the prostitution industry for years.”
“Could be,” Ace concedes. “But if my information is correct, this would have them dealing in slavery, not sex work or drugs.”
Our meeting with Ace drifts into friendlier territory while he and Theo catch up on their personal lives.
Ace asks questions about June that Theo happily gives long-winded answers to.
He’s so preoccupied talking about his girlfriend that he doesn’t see the greedy way Ace watches and listens.
Like he’s trying to memorize every word or read between the lines.
He even asks about June’s friends. Theo’s answers aren’t as detailed, and when he says, “Sadie is a lot. Always so happy and a little too intense, to be honest. Loyal as hell, though,” I want to slug him and give my own answer.
She’s not a lot. Half of that happiness is a facade. And too intense? Has he met his girlfriend?
“What about her other friends? Rose and…” Ace lets the question hang in the air, his black eyebrows tugging together as he waits for Theo’s reply.
“Evelyn. I haven’t met her. I don’t think she’s happy about me and June. The more strait-laced type, you know? I doubt she’d ever be caught dead here.” He gestures around him as if to encompass the entirety of the Iron Cage.
Ace hums in response. I notice his fingers digging into his thighs and a tick in his jaw.
That suspicion I felt in his office flares again. “Why the sudden interest?”
“It’s nothing really, I’ve just been thinking.”
“About?” I prompt. A glimpse in Theo’s direction reveals that his easy expression has become more guarded and unsure.
Ace shrugs. He looks uncomfortable as his jaw clenches again, like he’s chewing on unsaid words.
“Family. Friends. With everything that’s happened these last few months, I guess I just…
I want you to know that I’ve got your back.
” He directs this to Theo with so much sincerity that the suspicion starts feeling more like vapor than real smoke.
“No matter what. I don’t need to know details or anything, but know that if you ever need something. ”
“I know that, Ace.”
“That goes for the people in your life too. Your family is mine.”
“Are you about to propose?” Theo asks. “Because I feel inclined to tell you that I’m happily in a relationship.”
Ace huffs. “You never change.”
“Apparently you do.”
“Don’t make this weird, T.”
“I think you’re doing that by yourself.”
Ace lets out a quiet groan. “Whatever. I better get going. You know where to find me.”
Theo walks him out while I stay in his office, wondering what’s going on with Actaeon Demos. Whatever it is, I have a bad feeling that if it blows up, it’ll affect us all.
~
On Wednesday, I arrive five minutes early to Sadie’s apartment. The short walk from my bike, up the stairs, and to her door is spent mentally arguing with myself about how bad of an idea this is. The problem is, I don’t care.
Then Sadie opens her door, and I can’t remember why I ever cared in the first place. She’s not wearing glasses, and her black hair brushes her shoulders. She smiles, those full, pouty lips drawing my attention.
“Hey,” she says, sounding much more uncertain than she did yesterday.
There’s no point in beating around the bush. We both know why I’m here. If I have to spend one more second without the knowledge of what it feels like to be inside of her, I’m going to burn the entire apartment complex to the ground.
Gripping her throat, I pull her forward as I lean down.
Her lips part in a gasp I eagerly swallow.
Her thin arms wrap around my neck so she has more leverage to return the kiss.
I take several steps forward, and she matches them, moving backward.
As soon as I’m inside the apartment, I reach back and throw the door shut, planning to remove every article of clothing hiding the rest of her body from me.
Except I don’t get a chance to do that, or even deepen the kiss, before we’re interrupted by barking and her giant dog forcing his head between us.
“Soot, no!” she shouts. But the dog has already separated us and turned his attention to me. He growls and barks, placing himself between me and his mother. I want to be annoyed, but I really feel grateful that she has such a protector devoted to her. “Soot, it’s James. You’ve met him before.”
The reminder does nothing to assuage the dog’s distrust. Snarling, he steps toward me. In a calming voice, I say, “Hey boy,” and hold out my hand for him to sniff. Slowly, I bend my knees, sinking to his level. “Remember me?”
Soot sniffs my hand, considers for a minute, then wags his tail and bounds forward. Sadie shouts a warning, but before I can stand or she can grab the dog, his paws have landed on my shoulders and I’m on my ass, slobber dripping down my face as he licks me.
“Good to see you too,” I say, petting his head while Sadie tugs him off.
“I’m sorry. He was asleep in my bedroom, and I meant to close the door before you got here.”
“Don’t worry about it.” I climb to my feet, wiping my very wet face.
“Let me get you a rag.” She rushes to the kitchen and comes back with two rags, one damp and one dry. I use the damp one first, removing the slimy saliva from my face and beard. “Sorry again.”
Walking over to the kitchen, I toss the rags on the counter. “It’s fine, seriously. But maybe he should stay out here for the rest of the night. His tongue isn’t the one I’ve been fantasizing about.”
She laughs even as a pink hue fills her cheeks. “Clever.”
“Just being honest. Now, are you going to make me suffer through small talk or can we get to the reason I’m here?”
“Very presumptuous of you, sir.”
I stalk to her, a rumbling need drowning out every other thought in my mind. “This is happening. You just need to tell me if you’d prefer I order you to your knees or drop to my own and start begging.”
Her crossed arms fall and she tips her head back to look at me. “Both sound good to me.”
“Sadie,” I growl in warning. The patience I’ve been wearing thin is about to snap.
Apparently, she’s prepared to test it even further, because she takes a shaky step back. “Wait. We need to talk first.”
I stifle my groan. She really wants to do this now?
“About?”
She bites her lip. “I need to tell you something, and you have to promise not to yell.”
My eyebrows pull together as worry replaces annoyance. “What’s going on?”
With a deep breath, she says, “On Monday, when I ran into Bowie, I agreed to meet him again. We’re getting dinner tomorrow.”
“What?” My voice is deadly low, anger barely leashed. “We talked about this.”
“No, you yelled at me about this. We didn’t have an actual conversation.”
“You said yourself that he knows who you are. And you think meeting him alone is a good idea? He will kill you.”
“Or he’ll listen, and I’ll manage to erase any suspicions he has.”
“And what for? So you can keep dating him?”
She shakes her head, walking away from me as she breathes through her frustration. Finally, she turns and meets my eyes, her own filled with a steely determination that makes trepidation run down my spine.
“I may still be able to get information out of him. If I can convince him that I’m not involved, then he may lower his guard. Or maybe it’ll at least take some of the heat off you guys. I don’t want him thinking you sent me to him as a spy. He may take it out on you.”
“We can handle ourselves. We’re prepared for the Fivers.”
“I want to help!”
“Why? You don’t have to.”
“Yes, I do!”
I close the distance between us and grab her hands, which she was twisting in her own grip. “Why do you have to?” Thinking back to our conversation in her shop yesterday, I ask, “Is this about June?”
She looks down at our hands and shrugs. “I don’t want to be the useless friend anymore.”
“Oh, Sadie.” I cup her chin, pulling her gaze back up. “You know that your worth isn’t in how willing you are to throw yourself into dangerous situations, right? You don’t have to earn love or prove that you deserve your place among your friends. Who you are is enough.”
A tear falls down her cheek, and I quickly wipe it away. “Please,” I say. “Don’t put yourself in unnecessary danger again.”
There’s a pause, during which I dare to hope.
Then her gaze softens and a heavy dread envelops me.
“I have to.”
My teeth grind together, and I drop my hands. Maybe I should tie her up and take her out of the state completely. She wouldn’t be able to do something this reckless from hours away.
“I’m doing this, and I need you to be okay with it.”
She needs me to be okay with it? She’s insane. I’ll never be okay with her stepping in the line of fire.
But her expression manages to suffocate my stubborn desire to protest.
I give a terse nod. “But I’m coming.”
Her mouth parts. “What? No.”
“If you’re going, then I’m going.”
“You can’t just show up at the restaurant. Bowie will kill you.”
“I’ll stay out of sight. But I’m not letting you go alone.”
Her jaw works as she considers it. “You can wait in the car. No hiding in the bathroom.”
I’d much rather have her in view, but if this is the compromise she’s willing to make, then I’ll take it. “Fine. But I still don’t like it.”
A smile graces her lips. “I’m aware. But it’s happening.”
Suddenly, the need to be touching her is overwhelming. She clearly sees the change in my attitude, because her smile turns devilish. “Now that that’s settled, why don’t you take me to bed and show me what kind of sadist you are?”
Happily.
With a groan, I scoop her up, slamming my lips to hers. Her legs lock around my middle and her arms loop my neck while I walk us to her bedroom. Soot tries to follow, but I shut the door before he can. He instantly starts whining, which makes Sadie laugh.
“Just ignore him. He’ll stop soon.”
Unbidden, thoughts about why she knows that fill my mind. How many times has she locked her dog out of her bedroom when she had a guy over? And why does the idea make me want to punish her?
“How much of a masochist are you?” I ask, stopping at the edge of her bed.
She smirks and licks my lips before answering, “My safe word will be Venus, but don’t expect to hear it.”
Holy fuck. “I won’t survive you.” Then I toss her on the bed and decide it’s my turn to devour her.