Chapter 11
Kaid and Maren walked together down the beach, but he found it hard to concentrate on the princess when he knew they had an audience trailing behind them, even if the company did hang back quite a bit.
Every date had been chaperoned. Kaid knew they would have eyes on them often, but he thought they would occasionally have some alone time to get to know one another. He would never get used to having so many people around.
Kaid looked over his shoulder to the crowd down the beach. It consisted of Halsten, the twins who were part of the royal guard, Svanhild, Linnea, and Asta, who was repeatedly throwing a stick over and over for her massive, galloping dog.
He and Asta had met twice since the courtesan incident to continue their sign language lessons, once in the garden and once in the library. They hadn’t mentioned what had happened in the forest since, but Kaid knew it was something they wouldn’t soon forget.
He had suggested they have their next lesson in the music room, since no one really went in there anyway, but Asta downright refused. He didn’t push it, seeing as the last time they were in there alone, something between them changed. He just wasn’t sure if she had felt it, as well.
Kaid once more turned his attention to his betrothed.
Maren really was beautiful. Her copper hair was luminous in the bright afternoon sun and her freckles were the color of the sand surrounding them.
He learned that she and Asta used to be much closer growing up, but coming of age had separated them.
Kaid wondered if that was the full story, but he didn’t ask.
It wasn’t likely that Maren would tell him anyway.
It seemed that the more he tried to get to know Maren, the more he learned about Asta.
Or was that subsequently the only information his brain remembered?
Their relationship was still nothing more than bickering and poking at each other, which was good.
He needed to keep his distance from Asta, even if they did share a monumental secret between them regarding the missing villagers.
No matter how intriguing she was, that was not the princess he was to marry.
“May I ask you a personal question?” Kaid kept his gaze forward, the essence of casual.
Maren’s brows furrowed, but she replied, “Yes, Lord Kaidian?”
He flinched at the use of his full name. He still hadn’t told her his preferred nickname, but he wasn’t sure what stopped him from doing so. “Have you ever tried to find your mother?”
Maren paused for a moment, but then continued walking. She let out a long exhale before responding.
“I suppose I could answer yes to that. But I’m not sure if it counts as a true ‘try.’ My father foiled my plans before I even left the castle, warning me that I might not like who I find if I really do seek her out.
He explained that she is an influential woman and it could cause complications should she ever lay claim to my birth. So I never tried again.”
Maren picked at her gloved hand, adjusting one of the fingers. Kaid had never seen her fidget before and felt bad for asking such a question. He hadn’t even had a legitimate reason for asking aside from pure curiosity.
So Maren’s mother was a lady of the nobility, perhaps? A royal from a neighboring country? Really anything was possible, seeing as they always had guests coming and going for parties and meetings.
Before Kaid could respond to Maren, or try to apologize, she spoke again. “I’m not feeling well. I’d like Svanhild to escort me back to my rooms.”
Kaid bowed, quickly kissing Maren’s gloved fingers. “Of course. Feel better, and I will see you for dinner.”
Maren smiled sweetly then turned to face the crowd behind them. Svanhild did not need any more than that gesture to know it was time to go. The navy-eyed lady-in-waiting approached the couple and placed a hand on Maren’s back, guiding her back toward the castle.
Over the last few weeks, Kaid had realized Maren fell ill quite often—usually in the middle of the day. He wondered what kind of condition she had, but he couldn’t just ask that. Not when they were still mere acquaintances.
He watched Maren and Svanhild approach the closest terrace and disappear toward the castle, one of the twin guards trailing a few feet behind them.
Kaid’s lips curled into a grin as Asta approached him, Dyri clumsily trotting behind. He observed the princess’s outfit and laughed to himself—one more time—before he had to hide it.
When they had stepped onto the beach this morning, Kaid and Halsten couldn’t hold back their howls as they took in Asta’s outfit. She wore a flowy white blouse, black pants, and brown leather boots.
It wasn’t her choice of clothing that was entertaining—Kaid couldn't care less if women decided to wear pants or dresses. They could wrap themselves in curtains, if they pleased. No, her attire had been hilarious for an entirely different reason—she and Kaid were matching. And gods, did he love the way her face heated immediately. She didn’t speak a word to him.
Until now, apparently.
“You couldn’t have gone and changed? I was out here first! You must have seen me from the terrace.” Asta’s arm gestured back to the castle.
Halsten stood behind her and shrugged as he shot Kaid a look that said I have no idea how to help you, mate. Useless. Kaid’s chief courtier was bloody useless. That was his fault for hiring his best friend for the job.
Asta ball her fists at her sides.
He pinched the flowing sleeve of her blouse then let it fall. “What if I wanted to match you, Princess? Though I do think I wore it better, if there’s a competition.”
The lord held his arms out wide and spun in a circle before striking multiple muscle-displaying poses. He swore he saw the corners of Asta’s mouth twitch up then quickly turn back down.
Asta looked to the remaining group of people behind them and waved a hand. “Leave us.”
Linnea lingered for a moment and Asta whispered something to the auburn-haired woman that had her following the previous order, taking Dyri with her. Halsten clapped Kaid on the back as he left and the second twin gestured that she would be watching from afar.
As soon as they were alone, Asta commanded Kaid to show her everything he remembered from their lessons. He fumbled with some of the words and Asta helped correct them, noticing how quickly she pulled away every time she touched him to fix a finger placement or wrist angle.
After about thirty minutes, Asta was pleased enough to allow him to stop. To Kaid’s surprise, she sat in the sand and started removing her boots. He watched in curiosity as she rolled up her pant legs as high as they would go.
“What are you doing?” he asked as she approached the water.
Asta peered over her shoulder and smiled, something wicked in her grin.
The princess stepped into the waves until the water was halfway up her calves. “The water hasn’t yet cooled from the turning seasons. Figured I’d let myself enjoy it one last time before I’m forced to avoid it for the entirety of winter. Join me?”
Kaid shook his head. “Not much of a swimmer. I prefer land.”
“Afraid of getting wet, like a pampered pussy cat? That makes sense.”
The lord narrowed his eyes at her and crossed his arms over his chest. Asta shrugged and turned away.
Kaid watched her as she kicked her legs around, the seawater rippling against the tide. The water was so tempting, but he remembered his father’s warnings.
Danger. Evil. Death.
But how? How could the sea be filled with such cruel things and yet feel so enchanting? It called to him, like an instrument yearning to be played. Could he resist the song of the sea for the rest of his life?
Asta was so stunning as she meandered about in the clear blue water.
Her blonde, wavy hair cascaded down her back like a waterfall and her sage eyes glistened from the reflection of the mirrorlike substance below her.
This version of Asta was far different from the warrior he had seen the other night, but still as captivating. She was just so—
Water smacked Kaid on his face, his chest, his legs. Asta burst into laughter as he stumbled back, then she doubled over and held her stomach.
Irritating. She was just so irritating.
Emotions ran through Kaid. Worry from the ocean water touching him, something his father had warned him to avoid.
Relief that nothing detrimental happened immediately, even though it had been embedded into his brain since childhood.
And annoyance, because Asta was finding so much amusement in his discomfort.
Kaid took a step back, worry coursing through him.
He couldn’t feel an earthquake, there wasn’t a tsunami on the horizon, hail wasn’t falling from the sky.
No, the thing that worried him was that he wanted more.
So much more of the ocean that it was causing him to grind his teeth.
Causing every muscle in his body to seize.
The ocean was pulling him in. Whispering to him. A flash of white glowing eyes flickered in his mind. The courtesan’s eyes.
Closer, young male. Come closer, and you will discover your fate.
The faint hushes were all Kaid could hear, as though something long asleep inside of him had finally awoken. The waves carried the voices of the sea to him and he couldn’t step away.
Return, Lost One. Return to sea.
Every spot where the water had touched his skin warmed and tingled. It felt familiar, yet new. Young, yet old. Welcoming, yet harrowing.
“Kaid!” He felt his body shake and he snapped from his stupor. He was face-to-face with Asta, her sea glass eyes frantically darting all over him. She was panting, her grip on his shoulders so tight it would surely leave a bruise. Was she worried?
Kaid looked down to see that he was a few inches from the water and he jumped back.
What the hell was that? His conversation he’d had with Niklas during their beach walk one night came back to him, pouring into his thoughts like a current sweeping him away. Was that a siren trying to lure him in? Or was that how it felt to be called by a finfolk?
Kaid shook his head. Neither were real. None of it was real. It was folklore, wasn’t it? But the courtesan…
Asta shook her head and stepped forward toward Kaid. “I’m sorry. I didn’t—”
Did she know? Was she aware of just how terrified he was of the deep depths beside them? It couldn’t be possible, seeing as his father was the only one he had ever discussed such manners with.
He once again stepped back, lengthening the distance between himself, the water, and her. She reached an arm out toward him. “Kaid, don’t. I’m truly sorry. I didn’t know you were this terrified.”
So she had known. Somehow, someone had figured out his greatest fear and reported it to her. That part wasn’t a shock, he supposed. Asta seemed to have everyone in her back pocket.
It was what she had done with the information that bewildered him.
She had chosen to taunt him with it. He knew they were playing a game of cat and mouse, but he never would have exploited her most serious terrors.
And besides, he thought they were getting closer, moving past the seriousness of the game and more so using it as amusement in a dull moment. Oh, how wrong he had been.
Kaid’s lips formed a flat line and he subtly shook his head. “I thought we were past this, Asta.”
He had been there for her no matter how far she pushed him away. He had comforted her after the courtesan encounter. But right now, he felt stupid for doing so. He had been a fool to think it was not a one-sided friendship.
Her shoulders sagged, but Kaid did not feel guilty. It was her turn to feel such a thing.
He noticed Asta cracking her fingers, then her knuckles. Her breathing quickened and the color drained from her face until she cracked her wrist and the tension uncoiled. It took everything in him to not reach out and comfort her.
Maybe he would never understand her. Maybe they would never be friends. The only thing he knew for certain was that he needed space.
Kaid lifted his hands and knew he didn’t fumble over his words as he signed, “Leave. Me. Alone.”