Chapter 15
CHAPTER FIFTEEN
W hile Alisdair read a list of things Keane needed to address, Keane paced back and forth in his study, struggling to concentrate. While he was certain everything on the list was important, the laird’s mind was anywhere but where it ought to be.
He could still smell Elsie’s aroma on him. He could still hear her gasps and moans of delight. And he could still see her body shudder and jerk as she orgasmed under his touch. It was something he was not going to forget any time soon, and yet, her thoughts, as he teased her, now played on his mind.
I cannae let him… I cannae let him…
A little more. Just a little more.
He understood her conflict. Her mind battled against succumbing to his advances, while her body danced at his touch. Eager to feel the sensations it had never experienced before. But Keane had never taken from a woman in those circumstances. Not ever. They gave themselves willingly, or not at all.
In fact, at one point, her thoughts had scared him so much, he felt compelled to ask if he ought to continue. He needed to know if it was what she truly wanted. Indeed, he was versed in ways to elicit the most pleasure from a woman. He also knew, in her innocence, that he had led her down a path that would make her ache for more. Still. While he might have known exactly how to get what he wanted, she needed to want it too.
“Are ye listening?” Alisdair’s voice blurred into his head. “Have ye even heard a word I just said?”
Lifting his eyes, Keane looked across the room, where Alisdair was standing. The parchment held in his hand, he gazed at Keane in evident frustration.
“Well?” he pressed.
Lifting his hands in apology, Keane nodded to his advisor. “I apologize. Please, continue.”
Alisdair’s eyes narrowed, and regarding Keane with interest, he said. “What is bothering ye?”
“Naething,” Keane lied, shaking his head.
“Aye, course nae.” Astute as always, Alisdair’s tone reflected his obvious disbelief.
A silence hung in the air between them, Keane looking at Alisdair, and Alisdair looked back. It lasted a whole minute before Keane lifted his hands in a shrug.
“Are ye going tae continue?”
Alisdair shook his head and gave him a determined stare. “Nae until ye tell me what’s on yer mind.”
But Keane was unwilling to reveal what had occurred between himself and Elsie. For a start, it was none of Alisdair’s business. He was not accustomed to bragging about his bedchamber activities at the best of times. But it felt almost a betrayal of Elsie’s trust if he spoke of what had occurred between them.
There was more to it than that. Alisdair had made his stance clear. His best friend had been against Keane’s plan from the beginning. To learn now, what had happened the previous night, would likely incense him. Yes, his close companion had certainly encouraged Keane to treat her with a little more tenderness and respect. He had tried. But lord knows what he would think of him going from one such extreme to another.
And thus, to avoid Alisdair’s judgement, for he would judge him, he avoided the subject entirely.
Nodding towards the window, Keane said, “We will travel tae Larsen.”
Making the small village a few miles out of the castle his target to distract Alisdair was as good an idea as any.
His friend eyed him, evidently aware of Keane’s deflection. “Because o’ the Calder’s?” he said, clearly testing him to see if he had been listening earlier.
Keane smirked and shook his head. “Nay, Alisdair. Because o’ the tavern. Ye never made mention o’ the Calder’s in yer report.”
“So, ye were listening, then?” he quipped. “Tae some o’ what I was saying, at least.”
“Did I miss anything important?” Keane came back, hitching his eyebrow.
“Only that Gunn’s men have been spotted about ten miles away. Did ye hear me say that?”
Keane’s expression changed, and he frowned.
“Clearly nae,” Alisdair huffed. “Well, they have.”
His brow knotted at the thought of an impending attack. It was what he wanted, but he needed to be prepared. “How many?”
“So far, the reports from the scouts are contradictory. Some are saying five, others are saying more than ten.” Alisdair shrugged. “We cannae ken fer certain, but they are on the lands, and their intention is nay mystery tae us.”
“Is everything in place?” Keane said. He was certain of the answer, but he asked at any rate.
Alisdair nodded. “We’ve doubled the guards inside and out. Everyone is ready. Now, ‘tis only a waiting game. They will strike, we just cannae ken when.”
Keane nodded. “And I’m nae waiting around here tae discover it either. If they’re ten miles out, the attack willnae be today. We will head tae the village and deal with those who need our help.”
Half an hour later, he discovered Elsie in the drawing room with Anna. His new wife flushed when he walked in and Anna, reading the situation, grabbed her embroidery bag and hurriedly excused herself. Only when the door closed behind the maid, did Keane speak.
“Did ye enjoy yer sleep?” he asked, leaning against the mantle and looking down at her.
She nodded and looked a little bashful. “I did. Thank ye. Clearly, I needed it.”
A flash of his nightmare exploded into his mind.
“Ye have nae need tae thank me, Elsie. Had I nae have woken ye so early, ye wouldnae have been as tired.” Though, he didn’t entirely believe that. What her body had experienced for the first time, likely had something to do with it, too.
A sadness crossed her brow. She then stood from the sofa she was sitting on, placing the book she had been reading down behind her.
“One cannae help night terrors,” she said carefully.
But as she approached him, Keane felt his defenses rise. He did not want to discuss his nightmare with her, nor did he want her pity. She barely knew him, and under the circumstances, that was the best way forward. Indeed, he had needs as much as any other man. And when she finally let him, he would bed her. But there need not be anything more than passion.
That’s nae what ye were telling yersel’ last night at the feast.
No, but the conflict between his head and his heart was still not resolved. She was there against her will, and that point was still valid. Besides, there was a bigger danger if he allowed himself to get too close. Laird Gunn’s attack was inevitable. The laird had been humiliated and was only coming to retrieve his bride out of a sense of pride. Elsie had been a prize that had been snatched from under his nose. His reaction had nothing to do with love or affection for her.
I need tae remain objective. Something I cannae dae if me feelings run away with me.
While he had no intention of allowing anything to happen to Elsie, he had to keep a straight head. He could not allow the laird to use his own feelings against him. As difficult as it was proving to be, he had to remain aloof. For his own sake, and the sake of his clan.
Standing erect and staring down at her, he said, “I am going tae the village tae deal with some issues. Nae doubt, I will see ye fer supper.”
His sudden abruptness surprised her. It also seemed to upset her, for pain flashed in her eyes, as though his words had physically injured her. It took a second for her to recover, particularly when Keane remained stoic in his stance.
And then, she said. “I would like tae come with ye.”
At that moment, Alisdair entered the room.
“Nay,” Keane replied firmly. “There have been sightings o’ Laird Gunn’s men in the lands. ‘Tis safer fer ye tae remain here.”
But his words seemed to incense her, and pushing her shoulders back, she lifted her chin.
“And how will me cowering in the castle look tae the clan? I am now Lady Mackay, am I nae? Was that stone ceremony last night nae meant tae welcome me tae Clan Mackay? How can the clan welcome me, if they never see me because I am hiding behind these walls?” she pressed, her arm sweeping in the general direction of the windows behind her.
Keane heaved a sigh. There was a rumbling notion in his gut that she was playing him. Using her newfound position, a position he had forced her into, and his own words, against him.
She’s a smart one.
Indeed, she was.
Alisdair, who had been listening to the back and forth, decided to offer his opinion.
“Ye said yersel’, Keane, that the attack wouldnae be today. Let her join us. It’ll dae the villagers good tae meet her.”
Keane looked from Elsie to Alisdair and back again. It was two against one. Not that those odds had ever been a problem before, but a part of him could not be bothered arguing. Besides, Alisdair was right. They were only travelling a few miles.
A little over an hour later, Keane, Alisdair, and Elsie entered Larsen. The village was like any other small inhabited place. Cobbled streets underfoot ran to houses that spanned out from the main hub in every direction. It had everything a village needed. A blacksmith, a carpenter, a bakery, farmers, and a healer, as well as a fine tavern. Which is where they were headed.
John Flatley was a good man with a supportive wife and a nice family. But the inn-keeper was behind on his taxes, and Keane wanted to know why. Keane had learned how to deal with such people from his father’s example. Unlike other lairds, who might send men to pressure those on their lands to pay what they owed, his father had a different approach.
“People are nae different wherever ye go, son,” Hamilton had said.
It was a warm afternoon as they travelled across the glen together. They were returning back to the castle after visiting a farmer who owed the laird coin. On their visit, Keane had watched as his father had sat and kindly talked to the man, trying to discover why.
“Nay man likes tae be in debt. It demeans him when he owes another. It takes his power away, and, fer the most part, a man will dae whatever he can tae pay what he owes so he can avoid such shame. And thus,” his father had continued, “when ye come across a man like Joseph, a man who works hard tae feed his family, a man who takes pride in his life and his work, ye ken that his lack o’ payment isnae from choice.”
Keane remembered that lesson from all those years ago. When he had been forced, far too early, to take his father’s place, he had employed the same level of understanding. His people did not serve him, he served his people, and thus, John Flatley’s problem was now Keane’s concern.
John welcomed them nervously when the three entered the tavern.
“Me laird,” he said, clearly surprised to see him. “Please, come in. Let me get ye an ale.” He turned to Soirsche, his wife, who hovered behind him. “Get some bread and stew.”
But Keane swiped a dismissive hand. “An ale will be fine, John. An ale, and a conversation.”
“Aye, aye, o’ course,” John said hurriedly, reaching for the tankards.
Elsie and Alisdair settled themselves at a table against the far wall, nearer to the fire. Noticing other patrons sitting about, Keane moved to a table in the corner, away from prying eyes and itchy ears.
“Ye ken why I am here,” Keane began. “Tell me why ye’re behind in yer payments?”
John went on to relay a whole list of issues. One of his children had been sick. Then a batch of ale was bad, losing him money. Then his wife's sister was ill, and they had helped to pay for her medicine. With one thing following the other, he had struggled to makes ends meet, and felt overwhelmed.
Keane listened carefully. The more he heard, the more sorrow he felt for John. Clearly, he had gone through a run of bad luck.
“I’m sorry, me laird,” John murmured, displaying the very shame Keane’s father had talked about. “I would never withhold what I owe if I had it. Things have just gone from bad tae worse this while.”
Keane nodded. “I can see that. Then, let us mak’ an arrangement that will ease yer troubles. At least until things begin evening out fer ye.”
Keane then put forward a proposal of smaller payments. It was clear the inn-keeper wanted to pay. He just needed more time. Once they came to an agreement, relief seep from the man’s shoulders, and John’s nervousness left him.
Having dealt with the reason for being there, John began talking about his children. Keane was listening intently when a conversation across the room caught his attention.
“It was a dreadful thing that happened,” a lass was saying, “fer he snatched ye right out o’ a church.”
“Aye,” another added. “Ye must have been terrified.”
While Keane pretended to listen to John, his attention was now on the conversation behind him. Word had got out about what had happened, and clearly, his people were not at all pleased. At hearing their disgust, a dread fixed itself in his stomach. But then, he heard something that took him by complete surprise.
“Nay, nay,” Elsie said. “That’s nae what happened at all. In fact.” He heard her hesitate for the slightest second. “In fact, the laird saved me.”
Well, I’ll be damned.
“Saved ye?” the first woman said. “By snatching ye from yer own wedding?”
“I was being forced tae marry that man,” Elsie said, her voice now gaining more confidence. “He’s an evil one, so, ye see, Laird Mackay actually saved me. And then… and then, we decided we would marry fer me protection,” Elsie finished.
“Just like that?” the second woman said, clearly struggling to believe Elsie’s story.
There were now murmurs from others who had joined in on the conversation. Elsie was trying to defend him by herself. He had to do something.
Excusing himself from the discussion with John, he stood from the chair and crossed the room. The villagers looked a little surprised when he lowered himself beside Elsie.
“Me laird,” one of them said a little breathlessly.
At first, their surprise confused him. But then, he realized he must have been hidden from view while sitting with John.
“Ye have heard stories, I see,” he said, leaning back and gazing at them, one after the other.
“Well, aye,” a woman said a little tersely, clearly more outspoken than the others. “There are stories being told about?—”
“Ye snatching me from the altar,” Elsie cut in, a broad smile dancing on her lips as she looked up at him. Her sparkling eyes made his stomach lurch, and he couldn’t help but smile back at her. “I was just about tae tell them how ye swept me off me feet.” Elsie then turned back to the gathered group. “I mean, literally,” she beamed, “fer he ran down that aisle and threw me over his shoulder.”
A collective gasp came from the villagers, followed by gaping mouths.
“It was all very romantic,” Elsie continued, lying through her teeth. “We went on a midnight ride across the glens, and… and…”
“We stopped fer the night in that wonderful tavern,” Keane jumped in, seeing her struggling.
“Och, aye,” Elsie nodded, “with the beautiful fireplace, and candles dancing all around us.”
“And when I asked her tae marry me…” Keane said. The villagers all leaned forward in eager anticipation of what he was going to say next. “I took her tae a bubbling creek, and we sat under a cherry blossom tree.”
“Och, that is lovely,” a lass breathed, eliciting nods and agreements from the others. “I wish me husband would have done the same fer me. He just grabbed me hand at the bar one night and said, ‘Well, let’s get this over with.’”
Keane, Elsie and Alisdair joined everyone else as they fell into peals of laughter at the woman’s recollection. But as more women tried to outdo her with their own stories, Keane gazed down at Elsie. Sensing his attention, she looked up at him.
“Thank ye,” he said, low enough so no other could hear him. “Ye didnae have tae dae that.”
And she didn’t. In fact, he was still reeling from the fact that she had. After everything he had said and done, the lass beside him had still chosen to defend him.
“Ye would have done the same fer me,” she replied.
Her words surprised him. Partly because he wondered if he would. Partly because according to her expression, she seemed to believe it.
And then, his next words left his mouth before he could stop them. “I dinnae deserve ye.”
For a long second, Elsie looked as surprised as he felt. Her eyes searched his face, no doubt wondering why he had said such a thing. She wasn’t on her own.
Where the devil did that come from? Were ye nae meant tae be staying objective?
That had been the plan, but clearly, his defenses were not as in line as he had thought. All his inner thoughts of protecting himself were overruled by his heart, for that’s where those words had come from. And just like that, his objectiveness was tossed out of the window.
Along with yer common sense.
“We should go,” he said.
It was partly to cut the growing tension between them. But the afternoon was also closing in, and he didn’t want dusk to fall before they arrived at the castle.
On the way back, Alisdair travelled some way ahead, giving Keane and Elsie some privacy. But they had already travelled a mile, and neither of them had yet said a word. Keane could only imagine that Elsie was still struggling with what he had said. Or maybe, he was only imagining that because he himself continued to mull over his words.
Why are ye denying what ye ken ye feel?
Once more, his heart pressed him. Pushing him to examine what was truly happening to him. How he was really feeling. But as quick as lightning, his mind gave a reply, it’s logic undeniable, if not a little na?ve.
It is safer tae deny it. It has tae be safer, surely?
For so long he had been intent on punishing Laird Gunn. In doing so, he had almost forgotten what it felt like to experience anything but anger, hatred, and revenge. Those things had been the driving force for all the decisions he had made in the last nine months. But that was before Elsie. Before this lass had walked into his life. And even after everything he had put her through, she had still sat there and defended him in front of his own people.
Well, she didnae exactly walk intae ye life. Ye threw her over yer shoulder and dragged her intae it.
Whatever the circumstances, she was there now. By his side, innocent in all her ways, and as opposite to him as a person could be. He, the night, with his dark thoughts and outlook. She, the day, brightening the places and people she happened to be around.
As they continued on, he gazed over at her, wondering if he ought to bring up the earlier conversation. But the fear of where it might lead held him back. If she asked, could he explain himself? Even if he could, did he really want to?
Ye should say something tae her. She is yer wife, after all.
Turning to her to begin a conversation, Keane caught a movement in his peripheral vision. Jerking his head to look, his heart suddenly pitched. There behind them were several men bursting forth from the trees on their left.
Gunn’s men!
“Ride!” he bellowed, leaning over to Elsie’s mare and slapping it hard on its flank.
Elsie shrieked as the horse reared. Seconds later, the mare’s forelegs hit the ground and the beast burst into a gallop. Keane dug his heels into the sides of his own horse and pushed the animal on, but the men were already advancing at great speed.
We’re nae going tae mak’ it. I need tae save Elsie.
Letting her horse continue on, he yanked on the reins. Finally coming to a halt, he then steered the horse to face the advancing men. With a final glance at Elsie to make certain she was continuing on, he jabbed his heels into his horse’s side once more and rode directly towards those chasing them.