Chapter 38
Chapter
Thirty-Eight
Malachi stood, barely able to move as Trent’s footsteps pounded on the stairs below. A moment later he heard the front door to the emporium open and shut.
He is gone. Trent is gone.
Malachi stared blankly ahead. The room didn’t change an inch. The fire still burned brightly, casting its golden glow. Wreaths, ornaments, and garlands still hung. Paper stars of varying colours still decorated his room.
But with Trent’s departure, a darkness had descended.
After several minutes, Malachi forced himself to move.
He pulled on a robe, went down into the emporium, and walked to the front door.
He opened it and stepped out, bare feet sinking into the snow.
The wind bit, cutting through the fabric of his robe and stealing all the warmth that remained in his body.
He looked down the street. There was no sign of Trent.
And even if he was still there, what would Malachi say?
Trent loved him.
Malachi couldn’t deal with that.
He closed his eyes. Trent—beautiful, vibrant, smiling Trent—should not love Malachi. Malachi didn’t deserve it. But that didn’t change the fact that Trent loved him and that Malachi had broken his heart. He let out a shaky breath.
Still, Malachi couldn’t change who he was and what he’d been through. He’d lost his mate. How could he recover and move on from that?
He re-entered the shop, closed the door, and locked it. Unsure what else to do, he walked around the emporium in a daze, footsteps heavy and slow.
He should eat. He should sleep.
He wanted to do neither.
He went upstairs and sat in the chair where Trent usually did. He starred into the flames. Eventually they dimmed and died. He stared into the ash and soot.
At some point, he must have fallen asleep in the chair. Images of tears streaking down Trent’s face filled his dreams. He kept hearing Trent’s voice, pleading and declaring that he loved Malachi.
Outside, the bells chimed. He counted. It was almost time to open.
Bleary-eyed, Malachi dressed. He went to Kelby’s terrarium.
She wasn’t there. He frowned. Maybe she’d managed to go downstairs into the store on her own.
Perhaps she was angry with Malachi because he’d hurt Trent and didn’t want to see him.
Throughout the day, he moved through the shop, feeling like a hand gripped his heart. Numbly, he served customers. He cleaned tanks. He tended to his plants. He went through the motions.
But most of the day, he just stared at the arched windows at the front of the emporium, watching the snow fall, desperate to see Trent’s figure appear. Knowing it would not.
The door opened with a low creak. He caught a glimpse of brown hair. For a split second, he thought it might be Trent.
But no. It was one of his brothers.
Because of course Trent wouldn’t return anymore. His siblings would pick up the elothea seeds from now on.
I will never see Trent again. His hands shook.
“Good afternoon.” Malachi walked behind the counter. Shoulders and arms tensing, he pulled out the tank of elothea grass. “Elothea seeds, correct?”
Trent’s brother nodded. “Yes. It’s Leo, by the way.”
When Malachi had met Leo in the bakery, he’d been laughing and smiling. He did neither now. Instead, he stared at Malachi with a hard and unflinching gaze.
Malachi reached into the tank and picked the seeds.
Would Leo tell him how Trent was? Would he berate Malachi for hurting Trent? Would he warn Malachi to stay away? He’d heard that sometimes older siblings did that sort of thing.
But Leo said nothing. Just watched Malachi as he worked. And somehow that felt worse.
The tension coiled tighter and tighter in his gut. All Malachi could see in his mind was the crying, beautiful young man fleeing his room the night before.
Was Trent okay? Was he eating enough? Drinking enough? Did he get enough sleep?
But Leo said nothing as he watched Malachi examine and package the seeds.
“That’s 110 bells.” Malachi slid the envelope containing the seeds across the counter.
Leo placed the coins on the table and reached for the envelope.
“How is he?” Malachi blurted.
Leo picked up the envelope and tucked it in his coat pocket. He met Malachi’s gaze, brown eyes hard. “Heartbroken. You broke his heart.”
Malachi’s lungs constricted. He recoiled. Then Leo turned and walked towards the door. He paused and looked back. “I’m meant to tell you that Kelby is with Trent.”
“What?” Malachi blinked.
“Apparently, Trent found Kelby in his pocket when he got home. Did you want her back?”
Malachi did. He didn’t want to have lost both Kelby and Trent in the same night. But perhaps she sensed Trent needed her. Or perhaps she didn’t want to be around Malachi after he had hurt Trent.
“She can stay with him.”
“I’ll tell him that.” Then Leo left.
Malachi stood where he was for several minutes, staring at the door.
He slumped against the counter. He pressed a hand to his mouth. He should never have allowed things to go so far.
But he’d been so lonely. He’d just wanted a friend.
Malachi had relished Trent’s companionship. And maybe that would have been okay if they’d not had sex.
But Trent had desired him, and Malachi had failed to see what a terrible idea it had been. He’d thought if he’d just been honest, he could avoid Trent developing feelings for him. It had been a foolish fantasy. Now they were both paying the price.
The rest of the day passed in a blur. When he locked up, he walked to the yellow sorrow. Kelby of course wasn’t waiting for him. Still, he stared at the plant for several long minutes.
Kelby, I hope you give him comfort.
Since Trent started visiting, Malachi had gotten into the habit of going out to get food for them after the store closed. He didn’t need to do that anymore.
He walked towards the back of his shop. He had some food left from their untouched supper from the previous night. The stairs creaked. He sat in one of the chairs. He stared at the other, where Trent had sat so recently.
He turned his gaze to the cold fireplace. He couldn’t be bothered to start it. What was the point?