A Betrayal
Siralaine
My eyes open, and I realise it’s still dark. The fire is still going, but it has eaten up a lot of the wood. What awoke me?
I frown when I realise I can’t feel Kai behind me. His cloak is on top of me, though. I’m about to turn when I hear his voice. It’s quiet and faint, but he’s clearly talking to someone.
Is someone here? How did anyone find us?
We had travelled by sky for hours and were in the middle of nowhere.
My eyes open, but I remain still. From the tone, it’s obvious he doesn’t want to be heard, and my instincts tell me to remain where I am. I close my eyes, focusing on his voice.
“…as I can. It’s not easy terrain to navigate without being spotted. Tell the King it will be done,” Kai’s voice is coming.
“Varkhazan has no doubt that it will be done; he just wants to know when. Morcant seems to have been alerted that you, Keiran Kaldor, the deadliest commander under Varkhazan, have arrived on Varindor.”
Father knows?
Opening my eyes, I stare at the fire.
“It doesn’t matter if he knows. I have a way to reach him, regardless of where he is. I will kill him in the name of Varkhazan. You need not worry.” Kai sounds cold, and it reminds me of the first time we met. I didn’t realise how his voice has become softer towards me now.
I smile softly, closing my eyes again. It seems it’s just a meeting for updates from Varkhazan. I’m about to try to sleep again when the next sentence the messenger speaks makes my eyes snap open.
“Your bride-to-be also sends a message.”
My heart stops as those words ring in my head.
Kai is silent as the man continues. “She says she will be waiting at the veil entrance once the Crown of Varindor sits on your head.”
My heart is thumping as I try to remain as still as possible.
No, how can it be that he has a fiancée?
I know we can never be… but then why did it feel like it could? Why did I dream of a world where we could be together? The fire blurs as tears fill my eyes, and it feels like years before Kai speaks.
“Tell her, I will be there, ready to welcome her into Varindor as my queen.”
It feels as if someone just put a trident through me. I press my hand to my chest. This excruciating pain… Why…?
“I will be sure to- Sir Keiran, are you alright?”
“Yes, just- it’s nothing. I will contact you when I have an update.”
“I look forward to it.”
Then silence.
But there is no silence in my mind. The pain in my chest is crushing me, and the urge to let it all out, to sing everything to doom, is enticing. He has a queen… a fiancée… So I am just what? His plaything?
I mistook those gentle words and those unspoken touches as more.
So foolish.
What did I think anyway? That a sky siren and sea siren could ever be? We were enemies before we were even born.
I hear footsteps and close my eyes, turning my face ever so slightly so there’s no chance for him to see the tears. It cuts deep, far too deep. He’s watching me. I can feel his intense gaze burning into me.
Then he sighs, and I feel him settle back behind me.
Just a bed warmer…
That’s all I am to him.
The way he held me earlier… the way I felt so safe.
His arm drapes around my waist, and I feel the warmth of his body behind me. My lips quiver, but I simply remain still, feeling cold and empty.
This journey had somehow become peaceful and fulfilling. Being with him, despite knowing who he is, that was my mistake! Falling for a monster, a man I don’t really know. A man who hates my kind.
If he knew what I was… he would kill me anyway. He has a sky siren bride waiting for him, and I’m just the cursed daughter of a tyrant.
We are worlds apart and are not meant to be.
I was just stupid to even imagine it.
“Sira.”
I open my eyes and look into Kai’s golden eyes. The ache in my chest is still there.
“Is it time to move?” I ask, looking away as I sit up.
He nods. “Yeah, I caught some game and made breakfast. Eat, it’s going to be a long day. We should be able to be at the border of the Water Court by nightfall.”
“Ok,” I say, moving towards the fire, which he has going again. I force myself to eat, my heart heavy. I look over at him, but he’s the same as ever, as if nothing had happened.
“Here, have the last of the water. We should manage to find a river around midday.”
It just feels like he’s talking too much today. He only wants to keep me alive because he needs me. I look at him, refusing to let him see my anger.
“Sounds like a plan,” I say with a small, practised smile before I eat my food.
Once we’ve eaten, I change into a pink blouse and skirt that Dorene had given me. It had been her daughter’s who had passed away. I fiddle with the flowing chiffon sleeves as Kai gathers up our belongings.
“Let’s move,” he says, placing a hand on my lower back. I smoothly step away from his touch, refusing to allow him to make me feel like this. He has a fiancée.
“Then try to keep up,” I say haughtily, moving ahead.
“You seem determined today.”
“And you seem extremely talkative,” I say, looking over my shoulder. His smirk fades, a small frown crossing his forehead as if only realising now that I’m not wrong.
I feel a sliver of guilt for making him feel like that, but compared to how hurt I feel, this is nothing.
Needless to say, the rest of the morning passes in silence. At times, I can feel him watching me, but I pretend not to notice, and if he tries to help me, I silently refuse it.
“Shall we stop?” he asks. It’s almost noon, and I am tired but shake my head.
“No, we should get to the river,” I answer, without looking at him.
I can hear the water, feel the sea salt in the breeze. We’re getting closer to water, and that’s the most important thing. Soon, I will help him get to Father if he promises not to hurt the innocent.
“What’s wrong?” he asks suddenly.
“Nothing’s wrong. Why do you think something’s wrong?” I ask, turning my head away. He suddenly grabs my upper arm and spins me around. His eyes are cold as he glares down at me.
“Are we really going to do this?” His voice is low, dangerous. “You’ve ignored me all morning.”
I scoff, yanking at his grip. “What’s wrong? Not enjoying not being the centre of attention?”
His eyes darken. “Watch your tone.”
I meet his glare with a smirk, bitter and sharp. “What? Do you expect me to be your obedient little whore? Ready to drop to her knees whenever-”
“Sira!” His snarl rips through the air, his wings flaring wide, shredding his cloak as they unfurl into their full glory. My heart pounds, but I refuse to stand down.
“But it’s the truth, isn’t it? I’m not wrong, am I?” I hiss, voice trembling with fury.
Realisation flickers in his eyes, and his tone drops to a dangerous whisper. “So… has no one ever taught you that you shouldn’t eavesdrop?”
He leans in, close enough that I can feel the warmth of his breath against my skin. I refuse to meet his eyes, but his fingers grip my chin, forcing me to look at him.
“I asked you a question.” His eyes glint icily, jaw clenched as if he’s trying to control his rage.
“You don’t get that right,” I bite back venomously, shoving him hard in the chest. He barely moves, but it’s enough to show I won’t just take this. Rage and betrayal burn hotter than fear.
His eyes narrow. “Why does my having a fiancée bother you so much?”
I laugh without humour. “Who said it does?”
He raises a brow, the corner of his mouth curving slightly. “We both know that’s the reason.”
“It’s the fact that you shouldn’t have been messing around! If I’d known you already had a woman, I never would’ve touched you!” I shout. “Now, let me go.”
For a heartbeat, neither of us moves. His grip tightens, frustration flashes across his face, mingled with something I can’t place. I can feel his anger, his turmoil as he stares me in the eyes.
“Let go!” I hiss again, trying to jerk free.
“She means nothing,” he says quietly.
I freeze, my heart pounding, and the ache inside of me squeezes painfully.
“Maybe not, but she’s your fiancée, the one you will welcome into Varindor and make your queen.”
He cocks a brow. “Do you want to be my queen? Is that it?”
“Don’t flatter yourself!” I hiss, hitting his chest with my fists. “We both know that once you end Morcant’s life, that is it. We will part ways. I will go to Earth and live there happily. We are nothing to one another.”
He doesn’t let go, instead holding my elbows firmly as he tugs me even closer, his eyes burning into mine. “Really? Because if you ask me, you seem to be falling for me. Tell me I’m wrong, Little Liar.”
I clench my jaw, my nostrils flaring as I look into his handsome face. How can I admit that I’ve fallen for him? That I want him, even if he is a sky siren?
But instead, I counter his question with one of my own, “You’re asking me?! Have you asked yourself how you feel?! Whatever this is – was, it’s more than just sex,” I whisper hoarsely.
The subtle care, the protectiveness, his worry, concern for me, the way he made sure I was warm at night. The way he held me…
“You’re delusional. I have a goal, a mission and a command from my king-”
“Stop making excuses. I’m not asking what you’re meant to be, I’m asking what you feel.” I should stop, but somehow, I know if I stop now, I won’t get the answer.
“I am not making excuses. What makes you think I care? I am the most powerful commander-”
“Deny it then! Deny it and let go of me,” I challenge, my hands pressed against his chest. “And I will never bring it up again.”
He knows I mean it. I can see it in his eyes. “I have an order to carry out. She is the King’s sister. I don’t even know her personally.”
I shake my head, turning away as I remove my hands from his chest, and he lets go. My heart shatters, but seconds later, he’s wrapped his hands around my wrists as he tugs them against his chest. “Look at me.”
I refuse.
The wind blows, and it’s as if fragments of my soul are being pulled away. Why do I feel so intensely about this? How deeply do I truly feel for him?