Chapter 15 #2
He blew out a breath and laid his forehead on the horse's saddle. Dread had settled into his gut the moment his eyes opened that morning. He’d gone to bed questioning Daisy’s feelings for him, and they still lingered.
If she loved him as she said, would it matter where they lived as long as they were together?
To him, it didn’t, and if he had any sort of opportunity to thrive in Silver Falls, he’d stay without question.
But there was nothing for him here. No chance of ever being anything other than the man who helped at the livery stable from time to time and got paid a measly amount of money for doing it.
He didn’t blame Gunter for that, though.
Gunter’s livery stable was a small business compared to what Liam and Lewis had created.
Silver Falls was too small of a community for Gunter to even need help, and he knew the man let him stay in the tack room and paid him what he could out of pity.
He couldn’t do that anymore. Didn’t want to, not when he could have everything he’d ever dreamed of.
All he had to do was convince Daisy to live the dream with him.
Straightening, he patted Bran on the neck and led him outside, tying his reins to the hitching post and heading toward Daisy’s house. Josiah answered the door when he knocked. “Marshal Lincoln,” he said when the man stepped back to let him in.
“You don’t have to be so formal with me, Clay. Josiah is fine.”
He nodded and glanced down the hall, where he heard Ewan’s boisterous laughter.
Josiah grinned after shutting the door. “There’s never a dull moment here,” he said. “Ewan sees to that.” He nodded his head toward the kitchen. “Come join us for breakfast. Daisy was putting the last of it on the table when I came to answer the door.”
“Thanks for the offer, but I don’t have time. I need to speak to her, though.”
“All right,” Josiah said. “I’ll go tell her you’re here.”
He stepped into the parlor when Josiah hurried back to the kitchen. He heard the noise in the house die a moment before Ewan yelled, “Well, go on, lass! What are you waiting for?”
The sound of heels clicking on the floorboards was loud in the stillness. The steps were slow, as if whoever was making them was reluctant to take each one, and it didn’t bode well. He knew without Daisy saying a word to him, he would leave town alone.
She appeared in the doorway a moment later.
The dress she wore was a sunny yellow with small pink flowers dotting the fabric.
Her hair was pulled up, thin sprigs curling around her face, and he’d never seen her look more beautiful.
The desire to take her in his arms the moment she stepped into the room was so strong, he had to physically force himself to stand still and wait for her to come to him, but she never did. She didn’t move beyond the threshold.
Something in his chest ached to the point of pain as he watched her.
He knew from nothing more than the look on her face that she wasn’t going to marry him, and the knowledge left him wondering if she even loved him like she said she did.
The realization that she might not made the ache pinch harder.
He crossed the room to where she stood and could already see the tears in her eyes.
His heart hurt seeing them, especially when he realized he was the one causing her distress.
He cupped her face in his hands, tilting her head up so she’d look at him.
Her tears fell when he did, and he kissed them away, inhaling the scent on her skin as his heart broke one beat at a time.
“I have to go,” he said once he lifted his head. More tears fell at his words, and he brushed them away with his thumbs. “Don’t cry. It will be all right.”
“I’m sorry.”
“You have nothing to be sorry about. I can only imagine what leaving your family feels like, and I understand. If I had a family, I wouldn’t want to leave them either.
” He didn’t know if she understood all that he said, but the sorrow in her eyes said maybe she did.
The clock in the room ticked by the seconds, and he stared at her lovely face, memorizing every inch before leaning down to kiss her one last time.
He lingered, tasting the salt from her tears on her lips, and her hands on his chest felt like a brand. He would miss this. He’d miss her kisses and the smiles she gave him. He’d miss her. He already did.
The kiss ended much sooner than he would have liked.
He was only prolonging his agony and causing her more distress, so he gave her a smile that he hoped eased some of her pain.
He brushed her hair from her face and wiped more tears from her cheeks and stepped back before saying, “I love you, Daisy Campbell. Never forget that.” Not waiting for a response, he left the house, pulling the door shut quietly behind him as he did.
His steps were hurried as he headed to the livery stable.
He saw Veronica step out of the dress shop and promptly ignored her when she called his name.
He grabbed Bran’s reins when he reached him and mounted without acknowledging Veronica as she hurried across the street.
Clicking his tongue, he pulled the reins to get Bran to turn and sent him off in a run out of town, churning up dirty snow as he went.
The world was frozen around him, and as he headed home, alone, the bitter chill and his wounded heart left him numb, a feeling he wasn’t sure would ever go away.
As long as Daisy was here and he was not, he knew it wouldn’t.
He was leaving his heart in Silver Falls, and he didn’t know if he’d ever get it back.
She shouldn’t have watched him ride away. Should have gone back to the kitchen and had breakfast with her family, but her legs were barely holding her up. The stairs had seemed to grow when she climbed them, and the moment she was behind her closed bedroom door, she’d hurried to the window.
She’d seen Veronica run into the street and saw Clay ignore her when she did.
That small act gave her some satisfaction, but watching him ride out of town did not.
He was racing away as if the devil himself was chasing him, and she knew she was the reason.
She’d rejected him, spurned his affection, and if he never forgave her, she wouldn’t blame him.
She’d told him she loved him, then let him go as if it didn’t bother her for him to do so.
What sort of person did that? Who told a man who had loved her from the moment he saw her that she returned his feelings and then let him go so easily?
Regret made her heart race. She should go after him—but then what?
She still didn’t want to leave her family, and he didn’t want to live in a town where he had nothing.
She should be happy he’d finally have a purpose. That he’d found a friend in Liam. A man who was giving him everything he’d wanted, but her own selfishness made her want to drag him back. To hold him here when she knew he didn’t want to be.
She didn’t realize how hard she was crying until Violet and Rose both wrapped their arms around her.
Her sisters hugged her to them and petted her hair.
She felt rung out, her chest hollow where her heart should have been, and a black sort of despair took hold.
The only man to ever look at her as if she were whole and perfect rode out of her life as fast as he’d come into it, and it was all her fault.