Chapter 3
Three
Rose
There were no windows here. No way for her to tell time.
After that, she had no idea how long she had been here. And it wasn't all that bad, she supposed. The king reminded her of that every time he came to make sure she was alive.
She was treated better than most people in this kingdom. Her room was luxurious. Sure, there weren't any windows. But the floors were covered with plush carpeting, there was always a fire in the fireplace, and she was adorned with jewelry and clothing that few could even dream of.
But all of that wasn't for her, and she knew that. It was all for the men who came to see her. To play with her. A little doll that they could pick up and do whatever they wanted to with.
Because her magic wouldn't let her see any of it.
King James was still fascinated by her powers, even years later.
He didn't watch, or at least, he said he didn't. He stayed only to see her disappear from her body, as though there wasn’t a person inside her form at all.
A husk, that was all they ever wanted, anyway.
Apparently she was always pliable when she was in that state. She would do whatever she was ordered to do, as if there was something of her still in her body to be ordered around. But she remembered nothing that happened.
Rose only had to deal with the aftermath. The pain. The bruises. The knowledge that she had been used and abused for years without a single glimpse of the sun.
All while being told she should be grateful for where she was.
Biting her lip, she sat on the edge of the massive sunken tub in the corner of her single room. She'd already completed her one hundred circuits of the room because moving was the only way her mind calmed. If she stopped moving, she started thinking. And thinking led to madness.
Nowhere was safe for her. There weren’t even people who would save her.
She was locked in this labyrinth with many, many levels.
People thought this entire place was just a gladiatorial ring, but no.
It was entertainment. Every part of this place, every level, was designed to keep evil men busy.
And they were. With her. With the fights.
With hunts of exotic animals brought in from all corners of this realm.
The men who visited her talked too much. They told her every horrible thing that existed in this place, and she had to endure knowing all of it. Her mind kept her safe from most punishment, but not from everything.
Such dark thoughts today. If she wasn’t careful, they were going to consume her.
The door opened right on time. The man she had expected walked through with a gleam in his eyes she knew didn't mean well for her. Usually she got a break for a week when he came in though, and that was something she looked forward to.
Rose lived in this world and one that wasn't real. Or at least, she didn't think it was real. And this man knew how to send her to that not-real world better than most.
"Hello Rose," he said, already stripping off his shirt as the door closed behind him. "How have you been?"
He didn't care. Not really. He was about to make her next week one focused on healing.
She trailed her fingers through the warm water of the bath.
The king had insisted she wear a particular garment that always told her this man was coming.
With his bulging muscles and scarred body, she knew he had to be some kind of fighter.
Maybe he was a personal guard. Maybe he was a gladiator. She didn't know or care.
But the glass beads that decorated this dress were pretty. They'd been stitched to look like water drops dripping down her torso. The sheer material beneath was the same color as her skin, so it looked like she was covered in water that clung to her skin.
"Rose?" the man said again, his voice now with a hard edge. "I asked you a question."
"I've been fine," she replied. Serene, Rose reminded herself. He enjoyed it too much when she cried. She'd learned a long time ago not to do that anymore. "How are you?"
Sometimes she dreamt about going back to the other priestesses. She thought about her sister, but that stung too much. Mostly she thought of the High Priestess and the little girl who should have listened to her warning. The little girl Rose had once been.
His hand ringed her throat, and she had the belated thought that his touch was already bruising her before the world just... faded away.
It was always the same place. A meadow, green and unending as it unfurled before her.
Rose thought it was similar to the meadow she and her sister used to play in when they’d been children.
Hundreds of flowers dotted nearly every inch, and it gave her a few moments of false freedom.
When she'd first fallen here, she'd curled up in these flowers and fallen asleep.
Resting gave her mind some peace. She was safe. No one could touch her in this world she'd made up in her own head, and that meant she could fall asleep without someone waking her up with bruising hands that terrified her.
But now, years later, she wandered. She liked to walk. Moving helped. Every step brought her a little clarity in a world that seemed to work against her.
She didn't talk to herself or pick any of the flowers, although she'd done that, too. Now, she walked for hours on end until the men were done, and that gave her all the time in the world to exist in a world that wasn't theirs.
They could keep her body for as long as they wanted. She didn't really care for it anyway. It was weak, sick, fragile. They bruised it so easily, and she didn't know how to fight back. The disconnect between her physical form and her mind had only grown wider over the years.
Brushing her hands down her plain linen skirt, she headed out. Sometimes she tried to count the flowers, but today she felt a pull forward. Like she was meant to go a little farther than she usually did.
The sun burned overhead, and the bird song filled her ears. So pretty, she thought as she skated her fingers over the velvet petals. She never knew where the birds came from, or where they even were. It wasn't like she could see any of them flying around.
But now there was something different about the meadow. A stream ran through it. Light and flowing quietly, it added a new sound that wasn't usually here.
Rose paused.
"Strange," she muttered, staring at the stream as though it might swell up and drown her.
This place hadn't changed in the many, many years that she'd been coming here. Constant and steady as the sea, that sameness had been reassuring. She loved being here because nothing ever changed. She was always going to be here, safe, exactly in the same place she had conjured.
Why would her mind make something different this time?
She'd been given to that man before. She knew what he would do with her body and how she would have to heal from it afterward.
The weariness that made her very bones seem heavy was exactly the same as it had always been. Life did not change for Rose.
So why had this changed?
Pausing with her toes nearly in the stream, she bent down and touched her fingers to the icy-cold water.
She could feel the current in it. It flowed around her touch, bending around her palm and continuing forward in a path.
She peered toward the end, trying to guess where this stream might be heading, but she hadn't the faintest idea.
And then there was the sound of a footstep behind her. She didn't whirl or react with sudden intensity as she might have long ago. Rose had learned quick movements got her in trouble. Slaps were often handed out before she could disappear, or worse.
So she merely turned her head to look over her shoulder, muscles tensing like a prey animal that knew to flee at the slightest hint of a sound.
A dark-skinned man stood behind her. Or a woman.
She couldn't tell. There was a feminine quality to their features, but they stood with a confidence that was intensely masculine.
A strange blend of the two. They wore a robe, she thought.
The silken fabric glimmered in the light, and looked like it was made of some pale liquid.
Their long dark hair fell in a waterfall to their waist, so perfectly smooth that it was almost hard to believe it was made of strands of hair.
And there was something wrong with their face. The nose was too straight, the eyes too far apart. Their jaw was too narrow to hold regular teeth, and those full lips were pushed forward in a way that suggested sharp teeth hidden behind them. This person was human and yet... not.
Until her eyes traced over the tips of their ears, just barely revealed through their hair. Those pointed tips weren't just the tips of someone with a high elven bloodline. No, those ears were far too long for that.
An elf.
A real, live elf. Here in her mind.
"I'm losing my mind, aren't I?" she asked quietly.
That was the only reason for her to see an elf.
She knew what was happening to her body.
Rose tried hard not to think about that while she was here, but if she focused, she could feel the ghost of the gladiator’s touch.
She could feel his fingers on her waist, and the crushing ache of powerful blows inside her.
She could even smell his sweat if she thought about it, and she tried very hard not to.
"You aren't losing your mind," the elf said. Their voice was so light it was even harder to guess if they were male or female. "I am Rhydian. You have no need to fear me."
Of course she did. An unknown person was in her sanctuary, which meant they were somehow in her mind.
"Who are you?" she asked. Fear spiked through her, and the sensation was not one she enjoyed. Not here. Not in this place that was supposed to hide her from all of that.
"I already told you."
"You told me a name. That doesn't tell me who you are."
They tilted their head to the side, strangely bird-like in the movement. "You don't recognize the name?"
"They don't teach little girls anything about elves," she whispered, slowly standing. There wasn't even a rock she could grab to throw at this person who had invaded her space. "This is my mind. My sanctuary. You shouldn't be here."
"But it's not entirely yours. You've been using this space for years, and we've allowed it. But there is more to you than just using your magic to hide." They reached out their hand as though to shake hers, and she stared at the strangely long fingers.
There was something wrong with that hand. Too long, too thin... missing a finger.
She couldn't stop staring when she realized that hand was missing a pinky. Or at least, to her human eyes, that was what was wrong. Perhaps to the elves, her hands were the odd ones.
She glanced at the creature who patiently endured her perusal, and Rhydian grinned. "I know I am very different to you. But I am not here to hurt you, Rose."
"How do you know my name?"
"This realm knows many things. And I am here to help guide you. This has been your haven for a long time, and that was quite all right with those of us who were already here, but it has gone on long enough. We want to help you do more with this place. But it is an offer you do not have to take."
She blinked a few times, trying to understand what he was even saying. "What do you mean, we?"
"There is more to this realm than just your own thoughts. That information is for later. You don't need to know everything right now. All you need to know is my name and that I will not hurt you."
Swallowing hard, Rose looked down at the offered hand that still hadn't wavered, and then back to his strangely dark eyes. "I don't... I don't know what to do."
"You know exactly what you want to do. That's why you came here in the first place. You know that nothing here could hurt you. Not really."
But so many things hurt her. Rose pressed a hand to her belly where a particularly sharp stab of pain broke through this reality.
She winced, feeling an odd sensation of the real world tugging at her.
The fear of this place was melding with what she actually felt, and if she wasn't careful, she was going to lose her grip on this realm.
The creature in front of her widened their eyes and suddenly… lunged.
Their hands framed her face, forcing her to look at them and only them. "Don't go," Rhydian murmured. "Don't do that to yourself. It's not time for you to go yet."
Tears formed in her eyes, dripping down her cheeks and sliding between the fingers that held her where she was. "I don't know how I can stay. I'm so afraid of everything, and this was supposed to be... be..."
Somewhere to escape.
"I know. I know you're terrified of everything. That's why I was sent and not someone else. You're so scared of men, and I am..." Rhydian chuckled, but the sound was dark. "Well, I am male in a sense, but as far from that as you can get."
He was sent to her? What did he mean by that?
"Your mind can become something powerful, Rose.
This realm can be more than a place to hide if you let it.
" His thumbs trailed through her tears, catching them one by one until it felt like her face had been washed clean.
"I want to teach you about everything. You can wander these meadows for as long as you wish, but if you want to use this time to learn, then I would like to offer that to you. "
"You want to teach me about everything?" she repeated. "But that's impossible."
"About as impossible as a realm conjured up in your mind." He took a few steps back and then gestured up and down his form. "And as impossible as it is to meet an elf."
"I thought you all hated humans," she muttered, trying to get her bearings.
Again, that strange head tilt as he stared at her. "I think I remember that now. It's probably best you don't bring it up. For now, we will just be student and teacher. It will help me to ignore your deficiencies, and perhaps help you to see me as more than just a conjuration of your own mind."
The situation sure had gotten odd. But she didn’t want to run anymore, and she certainly wasn’t planning on returning to the real world.
“All right,” she said. “I’d like to learn whatever you know.”
Rhydian’s eyes sparkled. “Oh, that is an awful lot to learn.”