CHAPTER 12
Teruo
Teruo stepped into the house, the only sound inside the patter of rain against the windows.
The lights in the entryway and living room were off, but a soft glow spilled from the kitchen.
Shinji was home, probably eating, but Teruo paused in the entryway, his hand running absentmindedly across his chest.
Earlier this morning, he’d felt the pull of Shinji’s reiryoku, like it wanted to lure him closer, and drain him of his life force.
It had taken a lot of self-control to pretend he was okay, at least until Shinji left.
When he did, Teruo had to lie down on the sofa for a few minutes to pull himself together.
It reminded him of the days back when he had first met Shinji and felt the full force of Shinji’s spiritual energy.
Beautiful and terrifying at the same time, it had left Teruo disoriented.
Right now, his body felt normal, like the morning’s dizzy spell never happened. But Teruo knew that, deep within him, his soul was being torn apart piece by piece.
Teruo had left Nakajima Kazuya a few messages to ask if he made any progress with the journal.
Called once, too. It went to voicemail. He almost drove to Minato, where the Nakajima residence was, to see the gangster face to face, but if he wasn’t answering the phone, he was likely in the middle of a mission, and not lounging at home.
Teruo ran his hands over his face, massaging his temples. He wasn’t sure how to face Shinji, how to tell him that trying to stay in control was having the opposite effect. He blew a long breath, then finally started walking toward the kitchen.
Shinji sat at the kitchen table, leaning back against the chair, his legs crossed at the ankles. He was engrossed in reading one of his mother’s journals and Teruo took a moment to just look at him, at the little crease between his brows and the adorable way his mouth was pursed.
When he noticed Teruo, his lips curved in a dazzling smile that melted Teruo’s worries.
“Welcome home.” Shinji put the journal face down on the table and jumped to his feet.
“You’re in a good mood.” Teruo chuckled.
“Of course. My energy is fully replenished and I can touch you.” Shinji threw himself in Teruo’s arms, hugging him tightly.
Teruo wrapped his arms around Shinji, sinking into the embrace, letting the warmth of Shinji’s bare skin envelop him.
He closed his eyes, burying his head in the crook of Shinji’s neck, inhaling the familiar smell of sandalwood.
Teruo sighed in contentment, savoring the feel of Shinji’s body pressed against him, and the way Shinji’s fingers rubbed the nape of Teruo’s neck soothingly.
They stood like this for a while longer, and Teruo’s gaze dropped to the kitchen counter.
A large bag sat on top, half emptied, vegetables scattered around.
There were two pans on the stove, but they looked unused.
He wondered if Shinji had intended to cook, but abandoned the task halfway through.
It happened often and Teruo knew it was because of Shinji’s past problems with his father, but Teruo wasn’t sure how to help him overcome this obstacle.
He pulled back just enough to press his lips against Shinji’s in a soft and tender kiss.
For a little moment, he felt reluctance from Shinji, like he was afraid he would hurt Teruo again, but then he brought his hand up to cup Teruo’s cheek and deepened the kiss.
Heat coursed through Teruo and his hands held tight onto Shinji’s hips, a mix of desire and desperation battling within Teruo.
He had his own fear too, that he wasn’t going to have moments like this in the near future.
Teruo shoved that grim thought aside quickly.
When they broke apart, Shinji rested his forehead against Teruo’s. “I’m sorry about this morning,” Shinji said, the smile fading away.
Teruo traced his fingers up Shinji’s spine. “Hey, it’s all right. I’m okay.” The lie weighed heavily on him, so he decided to say the truth. “I could sense your energy… but I’m better now,” he added when he saw Shinji panicking. “I tried to call Nakajima, but he isn’t answering.”
“He sent me a message earlier today.” A shadow of a smile returned to Shinji’s lips. “He said he found something useful. Not sure what, he didn’t elaborate, but I’ll take it.”
“That’s good. That’s a start,” Teruo infused his words with a confidence he didn’t feel. He wanted—needed—more than ‘something useful’, but knew that was not how things worked, and Nakajima Kazuya couldn’t perform miracles.
“Do I still glow?” Shinji suddenly asked.
Teruo’s lips parted in surprise. “Oh. Uhm, no.” He took a breath. “I had the impression that you weren’t aware of it.”
“I didn’t notice it until Keiko pointed it out to me.” Shinji averted his eyes, looking ashamed.
“I’m sorry I didn’t say anything. I didn’t want you to worry about yet another thing.” Teruo threaded his fingers through Shinji’s. “Please don’t be upset.”
Shinji squeezed Teruo’s hand. “I’m not upset. I understand.” He placed a palm on Teruo’s chest, caressing slowly. “But we have to tell Kazuya about it.”
Teruo winced. “He knows.”
“Oh.” For a second, Shinji’s eyes clouded with a distant look. Then he smiled widely. “That’s good. He’ll come up with a solution.”
Teruo’s heart ached as he watched Shinji put on his usual mask of cheerfulness. “I should’ve told you first. I’m sorry,” he apologized again.
“It’s okay. I’m not upset. I’m just…” A long sigh left his lips. “…disappointed with myself. I need to keep things under control and I can’t.”
“You’re doing great,” Teruo said, running his fingers through Shinji’s hair. “And you don’t have to worry about me.”
“Promise you’ll tell me if it gets worse.”
“Promise.” Teruo pressed a kiss to Shinji’s forehead and another one on top of his nose.
That seemed to put Shinji in a better mood because he beamed and gave Teruo another tight hug before turning his head to the kitchen counter.
“I wanted to cook for you,” Shinji explained.
“But then I freaked out because I haven’t cooked properly in so long and I didn’t want you to have indigestion because of me.
” He took a breath. “So, instead of cooking, I got half naked, hoping to distract you from the fact that I’m freaking out. ” He pointed to his boxer briefs.
Teruo burst into laughter, his palms skimming over Shinji’s hips. “Well, it’s working. I’m distracted.” He backed away and gave Shinji an approving once-over.
“Good.” Shinji grinned.
“How about I go get changed, and we cook together? What do you say?”
Shinji bit his nail and stared at the kitchen counter. “Yeah…” He turned back to Teruo. “Yeah, I’d like that.”
“What did you want to make?”
“Ah, salmon with fried vegetables and a carrot tuna salad. Went grocery shopping and bought everything. Maybe we can also make a fruit sandwich as dessert, since we still have leftover fruit from the box your mom sent us.”
Teruo bowed his head. “As Chef Shinji commands.”
Shinji gave him a cheeky smirk. “Chef Shinji has a rule in his kitchen: you can’t cook fully dressed.” He waved at Teruo and wiggled his brows. “Gotta… take off everything.”
Teruo tutted. “You little perv.” He gave Shinji another smooch on the lips, then went upstairs to change. He only put on a pair of shorts fast and dashed back down to the kitchen, wanting to take advantage of these peaceful moments with Shinji.
Shinji had chopped the eggplant, bell peppers and mushrooms, but then had abandoned them. Now he was hovering around the fruit and whipped cream for the sandwich.
“Wanna do the honors and make the cream?” Teruo suggested. Since Shinji usually preferred to stick to preparing the ingredients rather than actually cook them, focusing on that could’ve been the encouragement he needed.
“I don’t wanna mess it up.” Shinji’s cheeks turned pink in embarrassment as he said that.
Teruo stepped closer and reached for the small of Shinji’s back, caressing gently. “You won’t,” he said. “And even if it’s not perfect, that’s okay. We all mess up sometimes. You can always adjust it.” He pressed a kiss on Shinji’s shoulder.
“It’s so childish to whine about this,” Shinji said, sounding disappointed with himself.
“Not childish at all.” Teruo gave him a soft smile. “It’s just the two of. We can complain as much as we want.”
“Hm, true.”
“You don’t have to do anything you don’t want to,” Teruo added. “But I’d really like to eat a fruit sandwich made by you. I know it’ll taste amazing.”
Shinji let out a quiet chuckle, reluctant amusement flickering in his gaze. “That’s a lot of faith to put in me.”
“Of course. Aren’t we partners?”
Shinji beamed, looking more determined suddenly. “The best partners. All right.” Shinji grabbed the bowl and mixer, dragging it in front of him along with the ingredients for whipped cream. “But don’t stare. I’ll fuck it up.”
Teruo laughed. “As the chef commands.” While Shinji took care of the sandwich, Teruo put oil in a pan and set the eggplants and bell peppers to simmer. “I wanted to ask you something. One of my detectives said you called and sent a team to check on some people? He had to come to me for approval.”
“Oh, yes. I didn’t have time to give you all the details because after I talked to Morimoto’s son, I went back to the Onmyōryō to do more digging.
While I was at Morimoto’s apartment, I found out Morimoto was part of a team of field agents and there were some issues he and Nishino Shigeharu were arguing about on the phone. Then Morimoto left suddenly and…”
“Was killed.”
“Executed,” Shinji spoke in a low voice, sounding like he was saying it more to himself. His jaw tightened, and he swallowed hard before he continued, “Then I discovered a photograph among Morimoto’s belongings. This team might be bigger than four people.”
Teruo turned the vegetables on the other side, added seasonings and grated ginger, then put a lid on top. “You’re thinking the killer will target them as well.”