Chapter 61
CHAPTER SIXTY-ONE
Ellery
My hand fell to the outside of the pocket where I’d tucked Ryker’s finger. When tears burned my eyes, I suppressed a sniffle as the full enormity of everything hit me.
From the second I’d felt that sense of wrongness from Ryker, it had been a steady stream of go and do. But now, surrounded by amsirah rushing to reestablish some sense of normalcy to their tattered lives, I felt sucker punched by the magnitude of it all.
The duke had Ryker. That bastard was already cutting pieces off him, and if I didn’t do something to stop it, he’d destroy his only child.
The duke had already tried for centuries to break Ryker and failed, but things were different now. Before, that asshole kept Ryker alive for his own nefarious purposes, but the only reason he had to keep him alive now was… me.
But that wouldn’t be enough to stop him from cutting off more pieces of him. He’d probably bring them to the woods in the hopes they’d somehow find their way back to me.
I gulped at the possibility he could be doing exactly that right now. The collar of my shirt suddenly felt too tight; I tugged at it, but it did little to ease the constriction in my throat.
“Here,” Ruby said.
I didn’t realize tears had filled my eyes until I had to blink her into focus. Concern etched her face as she draped something around my shoulders and buttoned it at my throat.
My fingers ran over the deerskin cloak as I tried to find comfort in its warmth and softness, but until Ryker was free, I’d never find solace in anything again. “Thank you,” I murmured.
“You must be cold.”
I was freezing, but it had nothing to do with the air surrounding me. It was no worse down here than above; it might even be a little warmer since we were out of the wind.
The ice encasing my bonds and enshrouding my soul was entirely from the empty void I felt without Ryker. I had to keep the amsirah safe, but I couldn’t leave Ryker at the duke’s mercy.
We’d been working to build loyalty amongst the amsirah in the towns and villages and had formed a small army here, but it was far from enough. Not to mention, I didn’t trust any amsirah outside of these woods anymore.
All that loyalty and hope we’d tried to establish through our robberies had proved to be for nothing. Val had turned on us, and others could too.
Val had done it to save her son, and while I understood that, her actions shattered my faith in everything I’d believed we’d accomplished. Not only that, but an amsirah from our encampment had revealed our location.
I couldn’t think about what the duke did to them to get that information. It had to have been horrible, but they’d still traded the lives of hundreds to save themselves. And I doubted they’d saved themselves; they probably just ended the torture.
However, I couldn’t judge. I’d never endured torture before; I had no idea how I’d handle it. I believed I wouldn’t cave and destroy the lives of hundreds, but what did I know?
Right now, I felt like a foolish girl who was losing everything I’d loved and had such faith in. And if I didn’t do something soon, I’d lose more.
I moved my hand away from the finger in my pocket. It couldn’t stay there; it would soon start to rot, but I still couldn’t bring myself to part with it.
It’s NOT Ryker.
That choked sobbing sound caught in my throat again. When Ruby stepped toward me, I held up my hand to keep her away. I couldn’t handle sympathy and hugs right now; I’d completely fall apart in her arms, and I didn’t have time for that.
Not only that, but I couldn’t let these amsirah see me lose it. Many probably saw me as their last hope, and if I lost control, they might do the same.
Slipping away from them, I moved into the shadows outside of muted light from the lanterns and torches. Mr. Fletcher was still directing others; he pointed to the tunnel leading out and ordered six amsirah to stand guard in it.
I didn’t listen to the rest of his commands as I hid with my hand over my mouth to stifle my sobs. The amsirah spread further out in the cavern as they claimed different spaces, laid out blankets, and sorted out their clothes.
They’d taken the animals to their new areas, but Xanthus remained near the exit tunnel, his head turned toward the fresh air. I didn’t know how long the stallion would stay, and no one approached to take him away; he wouldn’t go.
Please stay safe, I inwardly pleaded.
Scarlet appeared before me; she clasped my arms as she blocked my view of the cavern. “Are you okay?” she demanded.
My heart hammered as my mind spun with memories of the black dog and the pulsing beat of the Heart of Stone. I knew what the woods wanted, but could I trust them?
They’d aided us against the duke, but was that to help us or them? Most likely, it was for the woods; of course, they didn’t want to burn, but it could have been for both.
“Lery?”
Images of Ryker kissing me, telling me he loved me, and slipping the ring onto my finger as our powers bound us for eternity swam before me. They were so real I could smell his cinnamon and horse scent and feel the warmth of his lips against mine.
I recalled our time in the maze that King Ivan had established and how I’d yearned for him to kiss me, almost as much as I’d feared it. We’d sat in the center of the labyrinth, taking it all in, and Ryker didn’t have a clue that he sat beside the amsirah who’d robbed him.
Our history was so complicated, but we’d made it this far. We’d fallen apart and come back together stronger than ever; we’d found each other time and time again.
And I’ll do whatever it takes to find him again.
The ring burned a hole in my pocket while the ice of his finger chilled my leg. Neither belonged there; they should both be with him, and I would ensure they found their way home.
The black dog was waiting for me, expecting me to understand what it required of me. And I had understood; I just couldn’t do what it needed me to do… then.
When the black dog rose and walked away from me, it was shutting me out and throwing me to the wolves.
And those wolves were howling through the woods, bearing down on us, and seeking to tear our flesh away. There could be a way to stop them; it might not be the right way, but it could be the way.
Or it could be the very path that led to our downfall. I didn’t have any other options. We had no army, were trapped beneath the earth, and the forest could decide to turn on us next.
That black dog had made a statement when it turned away from me.
“I have to do something,” I whispered. “And I have to go alone.”