Chapter 16 #2
Jenna rolled her eyes skyward. What is this New Age mumbo jumbo he was spouting?
She knew better than to put her faith in love.
It could really come back to bite you in the butt.
They continued walking and found themselves in front of the ice cream shop where they decided to share a cone, which meant that Cormac got most of it.
Not that Jenna minded. She was feeling a bit out of sorts at the moment and therefore didn’t have much of an appetite left, even for ice cream.
Next stop was the candy shop. “Cormac, let’s go buy some candy for you to take back for the little ones. ”
“Jenna, I have no money to buy it and I cannae ask you to spend more money on me than ye already have.”
“I want to do it. You can tell them it’s a gift from me.”
Cormac pulled her close and placed a kiss on top of her head. “Ye are a sweet one. They’ll be verra happy.”
“Let’s go then,” Jenna smiled, trying to be as cheerful as possible, even though she didn’t feel it.
The candy shop was full of families buying candy, which saddened Jenna even more.
She couldn’t help but remember her time spent here with the Moores.
All these happy people, made her wonder, would she ever have a family herself.
She found herself thinking about Cormac and what a good Dad he would be.
The fantasy of happily-ever-after was calling to her. She’d better not listen.
Jenna picked up a basket at the front of the store and led Cormac around, explaining what all the different candies were.
He picked a little bit of everything—lollipops, chocolate, jelly beans and taffy.
They came to a basket of peach gummy candies and Jenna said, “My friend Ashley and I used to come here whenever her family would bring us to Sausalito. We always stocked up on candy, but Ashley’s favorite were these peach gummies. ”
Cormac picked up one of the candies and examined it. “She really liked these the best?” he asked, sounding strangely like he knew her and was surprised by this information.
“She sure did. She’d fill the basket as much as she could before her parents told her she had enough.”
“Hmmm … I think I’ll get some of these,” Cormac said. He started filling the basket the rest of the way with peach gummies.
Jenna laughed. “I hope you like them.”
“They’re not for me, love.”
“Oh …” Jenna wasn’t sure who they might be for, but she was a little jealous that whoever it was obviously held a special place in Cormac’s heart.
She hoped it wasn’t another woman. There was nothing she could do about it though.
She wouldn’t go and he wouldn’t stay. They were at an impasse and it didn’t seem either one of them would change their mind.
At the cash register, Jenna paid for the candy and asked them to put it in two bags. Cormac wanted the peach gummies separated from the rest. Again, she had the odd feeling that Cormac had gotten the peach candy for someone special. She had to ask, “Cormac, who are you getting the gummies for?”
“For me brother Cailin’s wife.”
Jenna was a little taken aback. “I see,” she said, but she didn’t really.
They walked out of the store and down the street in the direction of the car.
Jenna was deep in thought. She didn’t like the way she was feeling.
Hadn’t she promised herself not to get involved with anyone.
And hadn’t she already broken that promise.
She was at her wits end. She tried not to sound too possessive or clingy when she asked, “Cormac, what are your plans for the future?”
Cormac, who had been munching on a piece of candy, stopped and gazed directly into her eyes.
“For me, the future is back home. I ken that it willnae be with ye. I had hoped that it would. I wish to get married and have a family and to spend the rest of me days with them. Now, I’m not sure.
” He seemed very contemplative. “What of ye, Jenna? What do you plan for the future?”
Jenna shrugged her shoulders. “I don’t know.
I have my charity work and the foundation, I guess.
I once thought I had my life all mapped out, but I have absolutely no plans now.
Sad, huh? I can’t blame Jonathan completely for what happened.
I wasn’t blind, but I didn’t want to see.
I wanted to be married so badly that I made a really terrible choice.
I wouldn’t listen to anyone when they told me I was making a mistake.
I purposely didn’t see or hear what was obviously happening right in front of my face. I am as much to blame as he is.”
Cormac pulled her in close and gave her a hug filled with warmth and caring.
She melted into it, but in true Jenna fashion she pulled away and started walking again, with Cormac hurrying to catch up with her.
She wouldn’t let him know how much she wanted him.
He had turned down her offer to stay and she had to think about getting on with her own life.
They reached the car and she quickly opened her own door and got in, closing the door before Cormac could reach it.
Distance was what she needed. She let herself get too close and now she was regretting it.
Cormac opened the passenger door and got in. She could tell he was confused, but she wasn’t in any mood to explain. She started the car and sped off towards the freeway. She just wanted to get home and put some space between herself and the man she so obviously wanted to be with.
***
Surrounded by nothing but the hum of the car, the silence emanating from Jenna was a reminder that he hadn’t been able to win her over.
That his trip to San Francisco had been a failure.
Cormac couldn’t think of what to do or say to lift Jenna’s spirits.
She had been acting oddly for the last few hours.
He had one more day in San Francisco and he wanted to spend it with her.
Despite her prickly side, he found her to be fascinating.
She was smart and beautiful. She made him laugh and her warmth and caring were apparent, even though she tried her best to hide it.
“Jenna, what is wrong, lass?” he asked, concern written all over his face. Not that Jenna would have noticed. She didn’t take her eyes from the road in front of her.
“Nothing’s wrong,” she replied.
Cormac was not convinced. “Are ye sure? Ye’ve not said a word in quite a long time.”
“I’m fine … really. Just concentrating on my driving.”
“Aye. I can see that.” He waited a beat and when she didn’t respond, he hopefully asked, “What will we do tomorrow, Jenna, love?”
“Well, I don’t know what you’re doing, but I have things I have to catch up on. I’ve taken enough time off to spend with you and now I need to get back to my own life.”
“I see. It’s my last day here tomorrow. I hoped you could spend it with me.
We dinna need to do anything special. I just want to be with you.
” He hoped he wasn’t sounding as desperate as he felt.
Why was she pushing him away? This had been the most wonderful week of his life and he thought she was enjoying it too.
Perhaps not. He tried another tactic. “Jenna, I will go with ye, to help with whatever it is ye need to do.”
“No, that wouldn’t work. I just need to be by myself.”
“Is that what ye really want, Jenna?”
“Yes. Yes it is.”
Silence again. He wouldn’t fight her on this. She had obviously made up her mind. He would just see how the day went. He’d wait for her to come to him. He felt sure she would.
The car pulled into the garage and they both got out. Jenna locked everything up and they headed upstairs to the kitchen entrance. Dylan was seated at the counter and he looked up as they entered.
“Hey, there you are? I was wondering what happened to you two. Thought you might have run off and eloped,” he laughed at his own joke.
Jenna scowled at him and headed off to her room.
“Jenna,” Cormac called after her.
“I can’t do this right now, Cormac. Good night,” she said and he heard the slam of her bedroom door.
“Okay, what did you do now?” Dylan wondered.
“I did nothing, Dylan, I promise. We had a lovely day. I dinna ken why she is behaving this way.”
“Did you have a fight?”
“Nae. As I said, everything went verra well.” Cormac thought back on the day and realized that the only time Jenna had turned away from him was when they discussed his leaving.
“Perhaps she is upset with me because I am leaving. She did ask me to stay, but when I explained that I couldnae she seemed upset. She was back to normal for a short time and then she went back to not speaking with me.”
“Hmmm … That’s not good.” Dylan scrunched his eyebrows and asked, “Cormac, is there a reason you can’t stay?”
“Edna told me that if I didnae return at the appointed time, I might not be able to return at all. She hasnae ever sent anyone away from their own time to such a distant place. I cannae risk that. I have my family back home and I wouldnae wish to live without them in my life. If there was a way for me to stay a while longer, I would. Jenna willnae return with me and I am truly saddened by that, but I understand why she must stay. She doesnae feel she knows me well enough to leave all this behind and truth be told, I find I dinna ken her all that well either.”
Cormac paced restlessly across the kitchen floor. “What am I to do, Dylan? I have one more day here and I want to spend it with her.”
“I’ll try talking to her. Not right now though. Sometimes she just needs a little time to think and then once she realizes she’s being unreasonable she’s back to normal.”
“Do ye think that will happen?” Cormac asked. Dylan shrugged his shoulders and Cormac was not convinced it would work. “I’ll be off to bed then. I’ll see ye on the morn.”
“Good night, Cormac.”
Cormac headed to his room. He wanted to stop at Jenna’s door, but he didn’t want to make her angry.
When she was angry all he wanted to do was make her happy.
Seeing her smile was like watching the sunrise.
Her face glowed and her eyes sparkled and they did that for him, because of him.
It was a gift that perhaps he didn’t deserve.