6. Fix
Chapter 6
Fix
I f Slatehollow had had any strict traffic rules other than ‘don’t kill someone,’ Fix would have broken them all.
His truck screeched along the streets as he rushed to Liam’s apartment, his mind overflowing with worst-case scenarios having no information to go off except the sound of Liam’s fearful voice telling him he needed him.
Fix tried forcing himself to believe Liam had gotten home and rethought their conversation. That he’d realized Fix would never, ever use Liam’s body as a bargaining chip. As payment. That Liam would always be the most precious thing to Fix and he’d never do him wrong.
He knew it was too soon after Liam had turned him down and that he couldn’t have changed his mind in that short span of time, but it was better to delude himself than to be sick with worry until he got there.
He bumped the curb as he raced to a stop, barely putting the handbrake on before he was tumbling from the car and bursting through the building’s broken doors.
He didn’t wait for the elevator, instead thumping up the stairs, taking them two or three at a time. When he reached the right floor he raced down the hallway to Liam’s door.
He knocked frantically, sweating through his shirt and panting hard. “Liam? Liam, are you there?”
The sound of barking stayed his hand before a shaky voice called out, “Fix?”
Fix let out a relieved breath, pressing a palm to the door. He wanted to break it down and be next to Liam that very second, but Fix was nothing if not a man who learned from his mistakes. He’d invaded Liam’s space already and caused Liam distress, and despite feeling justified in the moment, he wouldn’t repeat it.
“It’s me,” he said instead, trying to keep his voice steady and sure. “Can you let me in?”
“No,” Liam said. “I…I’m locked in.”
“Did the door get stuck?” Fix asked, the panic subsiding slightly now that he could hear Liam on the other side. He sounded okay enough, if a little shaken and scared.
“Curse,” Liam said. “They’re back.”
“They?”
“Carpet, lights, my sewing things, hair. And the door.”
“Five,” Fix said, heavy brows creasing in worry. How had someone cast them so quickly after he’d just removed them? “I’ll go grab my kit from the car and be right back to deal with them, okay?”
“Just—” Liam started, but Fix didn’t want to waste time arguing with him again over payments and misunderstandings.
“I’ll be back in a second,” he said, rushing to his truck for his bag, then back up to Liam’s door before he even noticed he was gone.
He knocked on the door and listened to the cheap, hollow sound of flimsy compressed wood. He pulled out his white marker, unbuttoned his shirtsleeve, and pressed the tip of the marker against his tattoos. The curse was broken within seconds.
“Liam?” he called out.
“Yeah?” was the soft reply.
“The curse on your door is gone. Can I come in now?”
The sound of the latches being unlocked came in the next moment, and Fix’s heart only settled when he had Liam in sight again. But the paleness of his skin and the misery written all over him made it ache. His hair was draped over his face and he kept pushing at it, frustration clear as day.
“Hi,” Fix said as gently as he could.
Unease hovered between them now, implications and hurt guarding the bridge between them and making it hard to cross.
“Thank you,” Liam whispered. He was looking everywhere but at him, fidgeting in place before making himself lock eyes with Fix. He was so beautiful, even through a curtain of honey blond. “I… Come on in.”
Fix stepped in, Liam making room with King on his harness and leash again. The dog was watching him with distrustful eyes as he followed Fix’s every move. Liam pushed his hair back again, and again, and again, and Fix moved closer to him, raising a hand that shook with the need to touch Liam’s hair again. Feel it curl around his fingers and tickle his skin.
He brought his fingers close, so close he could feel the warmth of Liam’s skin on the tips. He held his breath, heart hammering in his chest when he realized Liam’s lips were parted and his head tilted gently to the side, bringing him closer. Closing the gap between them and brushing his cheek against Fix’s fingers.
Touching him again felt like fire, and Liam could feel it too because he snapped his eyes up, flinching back from Fix’s touch and shrinking in on himself.
“I’m sorry,” he said, clenching his fist and stepping back. King was still grumbling lowly at Fix.
“King, calm down, boy.” Liam tugged at the leash, pulling the dog back. “I’m okay.”
“It’s my fault.” Fix watched the dog settle next to Liam, tucking his hand into his pocket to stop himself from reaching for him again. “I shouldn’t have tried touching you.”
Liam looked away, a strange emotion flashing over his face before he tugged at his hair again. And again. And again.
“I probably have one of Midas’s hairpins in my bag,” Fix said, used to carrying stuff others might need.
“It won’t stay there,” Liam said, holding the hair away from his face. “It’s cursed.”
Fix felt like he’d never reacted faster in his life, because the very next moment the curse was gone. The silky hair in Liam’s fingers went limp and curled softly around his ear, staying in place.
Liam closed his eyes and sighed in relief. Fix saw the slump of his shoulders and wanted to scoop him up and hold him against his chest to keep him safe from everything.
“Are you okay?” he asked, and Liam opened his eyes, nodding.
“I am, thank you.” Liam looked away. “You can—”
“You said there were more,” Fix interrupted.
Liam pinched his lips tight. “The door and the hair is enough. I can live with the rest of them. They’re not that bad, I was just overwhelmed and melodramatic.”
“Being scared of a mass of curses placed on you isn’t being melodramatic,” Fix said, hating that Liam was punishing himself for some reason he didn’t understand. “Also, like I said in my office—”
“You said a lot of things in your office,” Liam said, chin jutting out defiantly.
Fix deflated a bit but held firm. “And you made your stance on that clear. We never have to mention it again. I can take a rejection without it hindering my professionalism. And, professionally speaking, I can’t leave you cursed. Especially now that you called me.”
“I knew the card was a trick,” Liam said, but it wasn’t mean. More…snarky. Fix liked it.
“Got me,” he joked back and felt himself warm at the small smile that graced Liam’s lips. Maybe they could just exist without it being awkward. Maybe Fix could be okay with being Liam’s friend. “Now, your curses.”
“It’s—”
“It’s too many of them in such a short span of time. Call it professional curiosity, but I’d like to take this case and get to the bottom of it.”
“What do you mean?” Liam asked.
“Somebody is working really hard to make your life miserable,” Fix said, pretty sure he’d be happy to bash that someone’s head in. “I’d like to figure out where they’re coming from.”
Liam looked like he wanted to fight, but swallowed the words and slumped. “I don’t know where they’re coming from. I’ve been wondering the same thing for years.”
Years?
Scrap the bashing. He felt a sudden urge to burn the world down.
He took a deep breath. “Let me break these curses so we can talk comfortably. Can you tell me again where they are?”
“I…”
“Liam,” Fix said sternly, instinctually letting himself go to that place of control, and Liam instantly nodded, listing them off.
Fix wanted to bask in Liam’s compliance, but he didn’t have the right. However natural it felt for Liam to respond to Fix, he’d made it clear he didn’t want it, and Fix had said he’d be okay with that. So he had to make sure he did just that.
They handled the curses one by one, Fix systematically checking for any others. It was almost obsessive.
When the apartment was curse-free again, Liam curled up on his couch with a blanket, King jumping up next to him to lie protectively over his lap and make sure there was no room for Fix to sit next to him. It was a little petty, and the look King threw him made sure Fix knew it, too.
The dog had as much sass as his owner.
Fix grabbed a chair from the tiny, round table in the corner and brought it as close as he could. “Do you want to start at the beginning?” Fix prompted gently.
Liam played with King’s ears for a moment in silence, his long fingers tracing out the sharp contours of their peaks and along the ragged side on the left one where a chunk had been taken out of it, cutting off an identification tattoo stamped there.
Fix wondered how that had happened.
He didn’t realize he’d asked out loud.
“It happened before I got him,” Liam said, laying a protective hand over the injury. “He was rescued from a dog fighting ring that was cursing them to fight better, and they said he wasn’t viable for adoption because he might be too aggressive.”
Fix grimaced. He’d heard too many horror stories from a defeated Wren. Curses ran rife within those circles, those immoral assholes looking for an upper hand in the ring by any means necessary.
Liam stroked King’s nose and the dog stared trustingly up at him.
“I took one look in his eyes and knew he was just scared. He’d been treated badly his whole life and never had a chance,” Liam said, the words seeming like they were coming from a deeply personal place.
Fix hated to think that Liam had experienced anything remotely similar. He didn’t make a habit of judging on circumstance or first impressions, but it was pretty apparent to him that Liam’s life was not an easy one. King’s obviously hadn’t been either.
There was a kinship between them that Fix had only seen the likes of between Wren and his darlings. Something that bound them.
Liam came back from the place he’d disappeared to in his head and glanced at Fix, his expression closing down. “I convinced them to let me take him and he’s been with me ever since.”
“He clearly loves you a lot. How long have you had him?”
That coaxed another smile out of Liam, and Fix thought he could get addicted to them easily. “A year now. He’ll be three soon, according to the vet. They had to estimate his age.”
“I’m glad you found each other.”
Liam smiled again, a little wider and easier as some of the tension melted. Fix didn’t want to inject more ice between them, but they did need to get to the particulars.
“When was the first time you realized you were being cursed?” Fix asked. “You said years? Are we talking childhood?”
Liam stiffened completely, eyes shuttering. “That’s insane. Who would curse a child?”
“You’d be surprised,” Fix said with a grimace, tilting his head when he noticed Liam wringing his hands. “So…?”
“Nothing happened to me in my childhood,” Liam insisted. It was blunt. An iron wall. Fix didn’t see a way around it, but maybe there was a crack in it somewhere. He just needed a peek.
“Maybe you didn’t realize it, but it could be connected to what’s happening now?” Fix suggested.
“My curses started later,” Liam said firmly.
“Okay…” Fix acquiesced to the unspoken demand to drop that line of questioning immediately. “How much later are we talking?”
Liam swallowed visibly, his hands shaking before he curled them into fists on King’s back. King grew agitated, as if he could sense Liam’s distress as he held himself together.
“It started around the same time as my…business,” Liam said.
“Do you remember how?”
“I can’t remember what the first curse was off the top of my head,” he said. “I didn’t realize it was a curse at first. I know it happened just before I moved, so I guess I just left it behind.”
“But it kept happening?”
“It just never stopped. It didn’t matter if I moved, eventually they would catch up. I just learned to live with them. I started a list of them at one point, but it got to be too much to keep track of so I gave up on that.”
“Do you still have it?”
“I might.” Liam looked over his shoulders as if trying to locate it. “I’d have to look through the things I just didn’t bother unpacking when I moved here. Doesn’t seem like I’ll be staying long.”
Fix felt everything inside him rebel at the idea of Liam leaving Slatehollow.
“You can’t outrun these, Liam,” he said.
Liam huffed, eyes flashing. “Well I don’t really have other options, do I? Should I hire a personal cursebreaker to follow me around and deal with my mess?”
“I volunteer,” Fix said, trying to make his voice light so Liam realized it was a joke and an attempt to ease the mood.
Liam stared for a moment before actually letting out a small laugh he tried to hide behind his blanket.
“Of course you’re funny too,” he muttered to King, as if he was complaining.
“Have the curses always been nuisance curses like this?” Fix asked to get them back on track, leaning forward with his elbows on his knees. “Have they ever gone past what that scarf did to you?”
“What do you mean?”
“Any curse can hurt you, even nuisance ones, but the difference between a nuisance curse that causes harm and a deadly curse that was set on you is huge.”
Liam shook his head. “It’s never been anything dangerous that was cast on me, and they usually don’t hurt…just…”
“Make you miserable?” Fix filled in for him.
They locked eyes for a moment.
“Yes,” Liam eventually answered.
“Is there or has there been anyone in your life that would want that for you?” Fix asked next.
He couldn't imagine it. Who would ever want someone like Liam to suffer anything? Fix wanted to wrap him in silks and cotton and Bubble Wrap just to make sure he wasn’t the tiniest bit inconvenienced by anything in life.
Liam shifted, cheeks bleeding red. “I don’t have the best relationship with my ex-dad—boyfriends.”
Fix tried not to react. He hoped he remained passive and unmoved by that slip, but his mind was screaming. There was no mistaking the word. Liam had had daddies before. Liam had been someone’s boy. Liam had been hurt by them.
Professional.
You’re a professional, Fix.
“My job also has an…unpredictable clientele.”
Liam caught his gaze and Fix refused to break it.
He had his suspicions about what Liam did for a living. It wasn’t like Liam was hanging around Cane’s ring for no good reason. There were only a certain number of conclusions Fix could come to for someone as obviously beautiful and out of place in that setting.
He wasn’t about to judge Liam for it.
“Do any of those options fit the criteria?”
“It’s hard to tell.” Liam sighed. “Look, I don’t just escort at Cane’s or wherever else. That’s actually rare for me. I only do that if I need some extra money for something unexpected, or if it’s been a slow month.”
“So what do you do?” Fix asked.
“I’m a camboy.”
The pink dusting his cheeks was too pretty, and Fix had to fight the images that threatened to take him over. Liam taking himself apart. Liam filming it. The fact that Fix could have come across him online at any moment. The fact that others knew what Liam looked like when he was about to come and he didn’t.
He mentally slapped himself and cleared his throat. “So you don’t know the people who watch you?”
Liam shook his head. “I have regulars, of course, but they’re usernames. Only the website I stream through has their payment info.”
“And you don’t reveal any personal information?”
“I’m not stupid. That’s like camboy 101.”
Fix nodded, feeling all out of sorts.
“Any weird comments from any of them?” Fix asked, trying to force himself not to think of Liam’s streams. “Anything that might have seemed normal at the time but stands out now?”
Liam worried his bottom lip between his teeth.
“People say all kinds of things to me,” he said. “Some of it I don’t like but…I think it’s just part of the job.”
“Maybe.” Fix tried not to imagine what people were saying to Liam. “Probably.”
“Do you think someone who watches my streams is cursing me?”
Fix sighed. “It’s a possibility.”
“But that means they…they know where I live,” Liam said, eyes wide and body tensing. “Right?”
“Not necessarily. Nuisance curses can be cast long distance.” Fix opted to keep the fact that it was very rare to himself. “I just want to cover all angles. I want to do my job the best I can and help you. That means thinking of every possible option. And a lot of those options will be completely wrong.”
“I received a gift today from an unknown sender,” Liam said, voice bordering on hysterical. He hadn’t heard a word Fix said.
“A gift?”
“It’s in the trash. I threw it out while I was waiting for you,” Liam said.
Fix was on his feet in seconds, walking over, pushing the swinging lid in, and spotting a box of flowers. He pulled them out, willing them to combust in his grip. They were just flowers, but clearly unwanted.
“No note, I assume?”
“There is one,” Liam said, and Fix rummaged through the trash before pulling out a little card. He read it, vision going blurry when he saw the words. “They’re my favorite flowers. Were.”
Which told Fix that this person at least knew Liam a little. Definitely his address. So maybe it was an ex?
“Have you ever mentioned on stream that you liked these flowers?”
“Maybe?” Liam said, voice breaking slightly. “I couldn’t say for sure.”
Fix hummed. “Is this the first time something like this has happened along with the curses?”
“Yes. My apartment was curse-free after you left,” he said. “And then the flowers came and they restarted again.”
“It’s hard to say if they are or aren’t connected. My gut says yes, but it could also be a coincidence.” He looked at Liam again. “Have you never thought of going to the police over this?”
Liam looked away and out the window.
“If someone has been targeting you for years…”
“They don’t care about the camboy’s sad story. Trust me.”
The finality and conviction in those words stunned Fix momentarily. It was another mystery. Another wall he was sure Liam didn’t want him to cross.
So he told the truth instead.
“I care.”
Liam was quiet for a time, the words suspended in the air between them until he met his gaze again, vulnerability painted across his face like watercolors. “You really do, don’t you?”
Fix held his questing eyes firmly, refusing to even blink. He’d make Liam understand he wasn’t alone anymore.
“Trust that. If you don’t trust anything or anyone else, just trust that I do care and want to help.”
Liam didn’t say anything, but he could see that his words landed, his eyes fell to his lap, fingers twining around King’s collar.
“Maybe if I’d known sooner,” Liam said quietly. “It would have all been different.”
“Known what?”
Liam looked up for a split second. “You.”
Fix put the flowers on the side and walked back toward him, stopping at the arm of the sofa. King gave him a warning growl and Fix begged him internally to give him a second.
He crouched down, chancing a hand on the armrest. King fixated on it but didn’t move.
“You know me now,” Fix whispered.
“It’s too late now,” Liam said, his voice as forlorn as his expression. “Maybe not for the curses, but…”
“Liam…”
“I think you should go now,” Liam said, and even though it was expected, Fix still had to swallow the disappointment down. “I’ll be okay.”
Fix wanted to scream. He wanted to punch something and that wasn’t a feeling he often dealt with. Fix was a peacekeeper by nature, and it shocked him how distraught he was feeling.
He reached out but stopped before his hand could touch Liam. He wasn’t allowed to touch. He wasn’t sure he was allowed to even be as close as he was.
“Honey…”
“Please don’t call me that,” Liam said, sounding gutted. “You said you accepted my answer.”
“I did.” Fix sighed, balling his fingers into a fist and pulling his hand back. “I do. I apologize.” He stood up and stepped back from the couch. “I’m only a phone call away.”
Liam blinked and lowered his gaze, stroking King’s head, but he gave a tiny nod at Fix’s words.
Accepting that that would be the only thing he’d get from Liam, Fix turned to walk out of his apartment.
“Are you going to look me up?” Liam asked before he could cross the threshold.
Fix turned back to face him. “What?”
Liam looked up, green eyes alight with the fire and spite Fix knew he carried around like a shield. “My videos,” Liam said. “Will you look them up?”
Fix held his breath in for a second.
“Why would I?” he asked.
Liam squared his shoulders slightly. It didn’t help. He still looked fragile and sweet wrapped up in his blanket, his gorgeous hair like a halo around his head and those full lips pressed thin against each other.
“You like me. You said so.”
“I did.” Fix nodded. “And I do.”
“There are videos of me online,” Liam pressed like he was trying to provoke him. “Jerking off. Fingering myself. I have dildos…”
“I’m aware,” Fix said, feeling the back of his neck sweat.
“Will you look them up?”
Fix could lie to him. He could say whatever he thought Liam wanted to hear. But he didn’t want that. Honesty was always what he cherished the most.
“No,” he said simply.
“Why not?” Liam demanded.
“Because I want the real thing. The real you. I don’t want to be someone in the crowd. Another username behind a screen. Anything that happens between us, if anything happens at all, will be because you want it.”
Liam stared at him, clutching the blanket. His fingers trembled slightly and his throat convulsed as he swallowed.
“And if I don’t? If you never have me?” Liam asked, and it sounded like a challenge. Like a test Fix didn’t know how to pass. He had no idea what Liam was thinking. He thought he’d caught glimpses but even those were hard to decipher.
“Then I don’t have you,” Fix said finally before he picked the flowers back up, turned, and forced himself to walk out of Liam’s apartment.