Chapter 5
Gabriel has been acting differently since he came back from his tea run last night. The rest of the evening was spent in silence, something tense and uncomfortable brewing in the air. James knows it’s only a matter of time before Gabriel bursts and tells him.
Or before he finds a different way to deal with it. Where James would rather talk it out, even if things could be uncomfortable, Gabriel is someone that can hold something inside as long as he feels like he needs to.
“You okay? You’ve hardly touched your coffee.” James nudges the cup closer to where Gabriel’s hands are absentmindedly tearing up a croissant. James already finished two cups of tea in the time it took Gabriel to start on his.
“What?” Gabriel mutters. He shakes his head and pops a little piece of crumbled up croissant in his mouth. Still chewing, he curtly replies, “I’m fine.”
There’s a quiet elegance to Venice. The air smells faintly of salt and the fog lingering over the cobblestones gives it a mysterious feel.
Even from inside of the restaurant James can tell that he picked a good day to do his exploring mostly indoors.
He expected the streets to be overrun by tourists, like in those videos you see circling around online.
He’s rather pleased to see that the opposite is true.
It’s obviously still busy on the street, people wandering around the canals and stopping at the market stalls. But there seems to be enough room to walk around at a normal pace, without having to worry about where to put your feet.
He chooses to ignore Gabriel’s insistence that he’s fine and takes the final bite of his own breakfast. While it’s nothing fancy, a croissant filled with red currant jam, he realizes that he likes it well enough.
Especially with the promise of more sweets and snacks to be found at the market.
He wipes his mouth clean, taking the absolute final sip of his tea and asks Gabriel about his plans for the day.
It doesn’t come as a surprise that Gabriel doesn’t seem to have any. “I’ll see. Listen, there’s-”
“I’ll be off. Wanted to go see Santa Maria della Salute,” he says, at the same time as Gabriel starts speaking. A beat later he asks, “Yes?”
Gabriel hums from behind his cup, having finally started on his coffee.
“More old churches then?” he teases. He ignores James’ inquiry.
In contrast to the white table and the bright air outside his eyes are unusually green.
The black turtleneck he’s wearing puts his long neck on display. James swallows hard, looking away.
“You say that as if you don’t spend all day sketching old buildings for fun.” James huffs, crossing his arms. From his place at the other side of the table Gabriel hums, shrugs his shoulders and salutes with his cup, as to say ‘you got me there.’
One of the things he’s grateful for is that most food seems to be paid for when ordered. At the end of the meal that means one less anxiety ridden exchange and gives him the opportunity to enjoy the food leisurely.
It does, however, mean that Gabriel ends up ordering – and paying – most of the time. It also results in him paying for the both of them.
Before he leaves, James reaches for his wallet to pay Gabriel back. “How much was-”
“Absolutely not, it’s fine,” Gabriel says, shaking his head.
James can’t help but protest. “But-”
“You’ll get the next one, alright?” The smirk lingering on Gabriel’s lips shouldn’t be so attractive. It’s when his friend does things like this that James wonders why there isn’t someone in Gabriel’s life. If there’s someone James is sure could be a solid, trustworthy partner, it’s Gabriel.
He’s happy to see that Gabriel’s rougher edges are softening day by day. It’s something that James noticed on their last day in Paris. It seems getting out of London is doing him a lot of good.
But this morning the softer attitude seems to be swallowed up by something darker. “You seem distracted. What did you want to tell me?”
Something flashes in Gabriel’s eyes before his lips settle back into a straight line. “Must be the air,” he tries to joke, but the mood seems to have soured even more. “Nothing important. Go look at some old shit.”
“I didn’t mean-”
“It’s all good,” Gabriel says, standing up as well. “We’ll do dinner, alright?”
James takes it as the dismissal it’s intended to be. He also makes a mental note not to bring up the change in Gabriel’s mood again. Conveniently, and not all coincidently, the café they had breakfast at is within walking distance of the baroque church. He’s at the entrance within moments.
The noises of the outside world recede as he makes his way toward the altar.
It really does seem there’s beauty everywhere, especially in ancient places like this.
The interior gleams in the glow of the candles and there are different fragrances of incense and a fresh mossy scent lingering in the air.
The stone walls make it colder inside the church, but the triple layers he’s wearing keep him toasty as he explores.
When he eventually makes his way outside again he’s met with bright green eyes. “Gabriel,” he says, smiling. After what happened in Paris he feels like he’ll have to start expecting Gabriel to pop up during the day one way or the other. “Done with sketching already?”
“I don’t know if you know this, James, but it’s below zero outside.” Gabriel quips, his eyes sparkling while his mouth settles into a frown. “My hands feel like they’re going to fall off.”
James hides his smile by blowing into his glove-covered hands.
It does feel like it’s significantly colder than this morning.
Even the fog seems to have intensified. The lights across the city make it feel dystopian in its romanticism.
This whole city feels awfully romantic. With the markets lining the streets, the narrow cobblestoned streets and the lights leading the way across the pathways.
Paris felt romantic in its own way, with it being the city of lights and love.
Venice brings a completely different feeling with it.
It seems like a city to explore with a loved one, while you’re holding each other close and soaking up the richness of the Venetian atmosphere.
“How about you get out of the cold? Join me at Doge’s Palace?
” It’s one of the places that James knows will interest Gabriel, with its Gothic influences and it being the heart of the city.
It’s only with mild annoyance at the fact that Gabriel only agrees to accompany him to get out of the cold that he starts making his way across town.
Gabriel settles in somewhere at the back of the palace hall, filling his notebook with what James can only guess are the ornate stairways, elegant arches and high ceiling, as James joins the guided tour he booked.
By the time the tour ends, the day has softened into late afternoon, with the sun sinking below the waterline. The twinkling lights are now even more intense in their reflections.
Both of the men find themselves wringing their hands together to keep hold of the warmth, although it feels fruitless with the temperature dropping even more the later in the day it gets. “I would say it’s almost time for dinner, don’t you?”
James brightens. Apart from the signature caramel waffles that are awaiting them in Amsterdam, the food in Venice has been high up on his list. As a big fan of pasta, he can’t wait to try some Bigoli.
They settle into a quiet little restaurant near the Rialto, where the scent of herbs, fresh fish and garlic fill the air.
The Bigoli in salsa, a specialty the waiter insisted on, is a thick pasta in a rich anchovy and onion sauce.
Gabriel’s eyes are distrustful as they fall on James’ meal.
His own plate of the, according to him, safer option of a classic carbonara looks just as decadent as James’ own dish.
He’s not even one bite in before he stops, admiring the way Gabriel’s twirling his pasta around his fork and delicately feeding it to himself. There’s just something about him that’s effortlessly classy. When their eyes meet, Gabriel raises an eyebrow. “What? Do I have sauce on my face?”
“No.” James laughs, pauses and murmurs, “I just wanted to say thank you. For indulging me and coming with me on this trip.”
“Anything’s better than being stuck in the city during the holidays,” Gabriel says. “Besides, who’s going to make sure that you’ll actually tick off those things in your little notebook?”
James flushes and stuffs a bite of pasta in his mouth to keep himself from saying something he’ll regret. Like mentioning the fact that Gabriel isn’t his boyfriend, so it isn’t his concern or responsibility.
They eat in silence for a little while, the sound of them twisting their forks against the porcelain and the clinking of the ice cubes against the glasses filling the silence between them. Gabriel’s the first to break the silence. “Actually, there is something I wanted to-”
“Oh god.” James’ gasp interrupts Gabriel once again. It’s followed by a groan as James ducks into himself and says, “What is he doing here?” He isn’t talking to anyone in particular as his wide brown eyes fixate on the person he just saw get up.
“Listen, there’s something-” Gabriel says while he turns back to James. The serious note in his voice is enough to alert him.
“James?” A harrowingly familiar voice questions from his right, where there are now two people coming to an abrupt halt. “What are you doing here?”
Like an unwilling reflex, James finds himself sitting up straight in his seat before he hastily and undignifiedly makes his way to his feet. He’s achingly aware of the pasta sauce in the corner of his mouth. “Paul. What-?”
His gaze flickers to the man standing next to Paul.
The man who he now recognizes as the rude patron he bumped into in Paris.
Riley, Paul’s current partner. James must not have connected the dots in his panic and hurry.
He swallows heavily. Panicked, he glances at Gabriel, who’s getting to his feet in a lot more refined way than he had.
“Finally did it, huh?” Paul’s expression looks friendly enough.
It’s almost enough to lessen the force of the scowl of his companion on his right.
It would’ve been a genuine question as well, had the underlying tone not been the familiar condescending timbre James has grown accustomed to over the years.
“Yes, I-” He swallows. His throat dries up as his eyes dart around the room. How does a person react when they come eye to eye with not only the ex that dumped them for someone else, but also with said someone else? For a moment all he can do is blink. “What are you doing here?”
“Well,” Paul waves the comment away, reaching for the man next to him, “you talked so much about this whole experience. We figured it was as good a way as any to celebrate our engagement.”
For a moment the world comes to a halt, only to pick up at twice the speed.
It feels like the rug gets pulled from underneath James, but the meaningful glance the two people across from him exchange is evidence enough of the truth of it all.
Gabriel’s brief touch to his upper arm breaks him out of his stupor.
“Right, uhm, Paul. I don’t think you’ve met Gabriel?
” James questions as he wrings his hands together.
It’s the only thing he can do to keep the tears at bay.
His eyes flick to Gabriel. “And Gabriel. This is Paul. My, uhm-”
“An old friend.” Paul interjects, reaching out a hand to Gabriel, who only looks at it before he looks back to James.
“We’ve met, actually. I believe we’re in the same compartment on The Evergreen. We bumped into each other yesterday,” says Gabriel, calm and calculated.
“Right.” James blinks. Of course, they were.
Gabriel’s grimace is as clear as day when he glances at Paul. In any other situation James would’ve laughed at the attempt of being civil. “Charmed.”
Paul does an impressive job ignoring Gabriel’s clear dismissal.
His companion grumbles something underneath his breath.
James figures he should be grateful that he can’t make it out.
With a sharp look, Paul’s eyes focus back on him.
“And how do you know each other? It’s hard to believe that you’d do this on your own, Jamie. ”
“I-”
“We’re celebrating an anniversary, actually.
Ten months, and all that.” Gabriel’s voice rings through James’ empty brain for a second.
It takes a little longer for the words to register.
If only his mind was a little clear, his vision a bit more focused, he would’ve enjoyed taking in Paul’s sour face with more clarity.