Chapter 15
CHAPTER FIFTEEN
Autumnal Equinox
Although Georgiana had been here three months, it now felt like she was leaving too soon.
When she first arrived, Darcy had seen her only as a painful reminder of a forgotten existence, but in the last few months they had become friends as they never could have been when he was her guardian.
His sister’s departure would leave an emptiness in his heart he had been trying in vain to guard against.
But he would rather have the good memories along with the hurt than not have had this chance to see his sister at all.
Darcy drove himself and Elizabeth to Nine Ladies while Tom Roland drove Georgiana. Sheryl had agreed to stay behind at the house with Sandra so both he and Elizabeth could join Georgiana. Roland had insisted on going with them, saying anything stone circle-related was his responsibility.
Their meeting last night with Sheryl to break the news about Georgiana and time travelling had been unexpectedly anticlimactic. She had doubted, questioned, and then turned to Roland and said, “You really believe this, Tommy?”
He nodded. “Hon, I saw her appear out of nowhere right there in the middle of the stones. And she didn’t know what a car was.”
Sheryl then blew out a breath and said, “Okay, then.”
It was the least dramatic response to learning the truth about a time travel portal in a ring of stones that Darcy had ever experienced.
Darcy had accused his dying father of being addled by laudanum, Elizabeth had vehemently quarrelled with his housekeeper, and Mr Willers had gently humoured him as though he were mad.
Georgiana had fled the room in tears, and Roland had needed whisky to stop his hands from shaking.
Sheryl had stared at Georgiana for a long moment. “That portrait is yours? You’re really that Georgiana?”
“She does not know who is in the portrait with her,” Darcy interrupted sternly.
Her mouth formed an O, then she turned to him and asked, peering into his face, “Then that’s your picture up in the gallery too? You’re the romantic brother who left Pemberley to his sister while he ran off with the woman he loved?”
He had shared a startled look with Elizabeth. They had not intended to explain his origins yet. It was going to be a gradual unfolding of what they assumed would be a near-incomprehensible truth. “No one has ever recognised me.”
“Don’t see why they would. You’re a lot older now,” Roland cut in. Darcy glared at Roland with what Elizabeth called his “Regency disdain” look. “Sir,” he added, paling and avoiding his eye.
Elizabeth’s mouth opened and closed a few times. It had been plain she was as surprised as he was at Sheryl’s equanimity. “You’re taking this very well.”
“Tommy wouldn’t lie to me. And all four of you can’t be delusional.
And I’m just so excited,” she cried, smiling at Roland.
“I love this house, and I know everything about it. Well, maybe not everything.” She laughed and then turned to Georgiana.
“Can I talk to you before you leave? I want to ask about the panelling in the music room. And what about the pianoforte? We don’t have any surviving records of when it arrived. You could tell me so much!”
Georgiana had hesitated, but then shyly smiled and nodded her agreement, and the rest of them had left the room in amused and astounded silence.
It was nearly eight o’clock when they got out of their cars at the carpark off Stanton Moor and walked to the stone circle.
Georgiana wore the same walking gown she had worn in June, and Darcy wondered if anyone would meet her in the dark in 1826.
She would be cold on the carriage ride home.
But her well-being was minutes from no longer being in his power, and his chest ached at the thought.
Someone leaving the moor looked askance at her as they passed, and Roland smiled and said, “Sunset historical photo shoot. Cheers!”
Darcy was fortunate to have surrounded himself with wonderful people. And he had to trust that Georgiana had likewise found her own support in the past.
They were silent as they crossed the moor, but Darcy felt a deeper and more eerie quiet as they arrived at Nine Ladies.
This was the last time he would go near it, especially on an equinox.
The nine stones made him nervous, but he had told Elizabeth the truth when he said he did not hate it.
They had given him his family and his current happiness.
He just hated being so near to something that could take all of that away.
Georgiana sensed his hesitation and turned to say goodbye to him ten feet away from the stones.
“I am sorry my arrival shocked you, Fitzwilliam.”
He shook his head. “I am pleased you had somewhere to go when you felt lost.”
“You were the one I relied on for everything, and then Mr Willers became my confidant and friend, and, and now that he is—” She broke off for a moment. “When I faced such a sudden and painful change, I did not know where else to turn but to my brother.”
A part of him recklessly wanted to tell her to come back any time she needed to, but she had to believe in herself.
“I have complete faith in you. Pemberley is still whole and has a role to play here because of you. You can handle anything, no matter how painful, how hard. And I truly think your life will have more triumphs than trials.”
“Thank you.” She looked relieved and happy all at once, and then her countenance fell. “I cannot come back again,” she said with trembling lips.
“I know,” he whispered. “Besides, your new husband will miss you.” Georgiana blushed and gave a nervous laugh. It was nearly time. “You have my letter for Fitzwilliam?” he asked in a rush.
She nodded and patted her pocket. He handed her another folded sheet. “A few lines for Mr Willers, but only if you think he might need to read it. And, and if you see Bingley in town this winter, please tell him I wish him very happy.”
“I will tell everyone who asks about you that you wish them well.”
He felt better now about not writing to anyone other than Fitzwilliam. It was right not to reach a hand back to that old life, not when he loved this one so much more.
“And I will say how effusively happy you are with your family,” she added with a smile.
He did his best to smile his agreement. Would they still be here with him once Georgiana disappeared in the centre of that circle? His skin felt clammy and his racing heart brought a pain to his chest.
Once she went back and lived her life with whatever knowledge and experience she took back with her, who knew what could change.
He had to hope nothing about life at Pemberley altered, but he could tolerate any alteration or loss so long as Elizabeth and Sandra were here with him and just as they were.
The sound of his own heartbeat thrashed in his ears.
What if they were gone the instant his sister left?
“Fitzwilliam?” Georgiana gave him a questioning look. He had been lost in his own agitated thoughts, but he had to reassure her before she left forever.
“Seeing my little sister again is one of the greatest blessings of my life. To have you meet Sandra, and know Elizabeth…” He held her shoulders gently and whispered, “Do you understand why I left? It was never the house or the knowledge and technology.”
She nodded, smiling even though tears welled in her eyes. “I am grateful I could see you again. Thank you for being there for me when I thought everything had fallen apart. Now I am reminded of what you told me before you left: that I have a place at Pemberley and that I can take care of it well.”
She meant she now had the courage to manage it alone, without the husband she wanted by her side, without Mr Willers’s companionship. “Georgiana, you must tell him,” he said, giving her a heavy look.
“Life back then is not like how it is now. Women do not speak first in 1826.”
“Then you will lose him because he assumes you do not want him.”
“He might think me terribly forward.”
“Or he might be delighted,” he insisted.
“I could not have my old life and the woman I wanted, not in the time that would be best for us both. I had to choose.” He looked at Elizabeth, hoping she knew how fortunate he was with his decision.
“I could not have both, but you can. You can have the man you want and keep Pemberley.”
“But I have to tell him I choose him?”
He agreed, and he hoped Georgiana was now resolved. She could choose her own happiness like he did.
“Sir,” Roland called, his eyes on his pocket watch. “It’s nearly sunset.”
Darcy hugged his sister goodbye. He felt his heart rate slow to hold her close, and his emotions steady, but the grief mingling with gladness still lingered. He hoped Georgiana felt the love and validation she needed. Her arms lingered around him, and he squeezed his little sister one last time.
Elizabeth gave her a hug, sniffling all the while.
He couldn’t hear all that was said, but the sisters clung to each other for a long while before Georgiana went into the circle.
He had never had to do this before. He had never had to watch someone else vanish, and he felt wretched to know how his family must have felt when he left them forever, how heartbroken Elizabeth must have felt when he left her in 2011.
Both times, he had been going toward something imperative, either saving his sister and his home, or committing his life to the woman he loved. This goodbye as the passive observer hurt in a deeper way.
It grew darker and Roland put away his pocket watch to pull out his phone to turn on the flashlight.
The dim light illuminated where he stood near to the circle, just enough to shine a little more light on Georgiana’s face.
She gave him a gentle smile that he returned, and he took comfort in the full life she was going back to.