CHAPTER TEN
I dropped to my knees, my hands pressed hard against the dusty earth. A high-pitched shrieking noise blocked out all other sound, and it took me a while to realize that it was coming from me.
No.
No, no, no.
Terror clawed at my throat as my breaths rasped hard in my chest. There was no air. I couldn t breathe.
Not Quynh. Anyone but Quynh.
This was a mistake. It had to be a mistake.
Quynh stepped out next to me and I wanted to push her back into the crowd. This couldn t be happening.
I had known that another maiden would be selected.
But I d never even considered the possibility that it would be someone I loved.
Demaratus had warned me about the second tribute on our third day of training.
She will be the first casualty of your war, he said.
What do you mean?
I cannot train you to protect yourself and another. You will only be able to save yourself.
That had bothered me. I didn t want to have to sacrifice anyone to attain my goals. Perhaps I could convince another woman to train with me. Two would be better than one, wouldn t it? It would certainly increase our odds that one of us would make it into the temple alive. Maybe I can bribe the selector with a second name. I can find someone who would want to work with us.
You do not have the resources, nor do I believe that you would be able to find another maiden willing to do what you re doing. You can only attempt to control your own fate.
I d accepted on that day that I would have to abandon whoever was chosen along with me.
I shouldn t have listened to Demaratus. I should have forced Quynh to train with me. She would have hated every moment of it, but at least then she would have had a fighting chance.
Or I should have murdered every Ilionian as soon as they got off their ship, the way I d wanted to.
She crouched down next to me and there was a heated knot in my larynx. I m so sorry, Quynh. So sorry.
But instead of responding, she just wrapped her arms around me and I finally let myself cry with her.
I would have to be strong going forward, get my emotions back under control, but I would allow myself this moment to grieve our intertwined fates.
A dark future I never could have imagined.
I became aware of hands reaching for us. Our father had lifted Quynh to her feet and was helping her walk back to the palace. I saw that our mother was lying completely still and had been placed on a litter to be carried back by several of the guards.
Andronicus got me up, wrapping his arm around my waist to support me. If I had been myself, I would have been embarrassed to have my captain seeing me in this state.
I might not have been screaming on the outside, but it was still happening inside my mind.
Not Quynh.
You have to protect her, he said.
I know. It was the one thing I was absolutely sure of in that moment-that I would give my life to save Quynh s. There was no other option. I will.
How? Andronicus asked.
That part I did not know. I had no idea how to help an untrained woman survive an entire city trying to kill us. She wouldn t be able to run as fast as I could. Couldn t fight. Wouldn t know the way to the temple.
What was I going to do?
Where s Demaratus? I asked.
Passed out.
Already? It was early.
Because of you, he said.
I nodded. Demaratus and I knew what we had signed up for. We were aware of the risks and all the possibilities.
But Quynh wasn t.
This was so unfair.
Father tried to take Quynh into her room, but she immediately protested and he brought her to mine instead.
You should rest for now. I will find a way to save you both, he said as he helped us climb into my bed. His voice was so desperate, so scared. Despite his words, I saw how bleak his gaze was. He knew the truth as well as I did.
There was no escape from this.
At that moment I decided not to tell him what I had done. It would be better for him and my mother not to know, to think that this had all just been random, meaningless. If they knew I had caused my selection deliberately, it would destroy them.
Don t tell Prince Alexandros, I said.
Father briefly knit his eyebrows together. Why?
Because Quynh and I will find the eye and return to Locris. Priestesses didn t leave the temple. It was supposed to be a lifelong commitment, but I didn t care. I would come home again with the eye and my sister. I don t want anyone in Ilion to know that I m there. Pretend that I m still at the palace. Delay him and the betrothal however you can.
My father s expression indicated that he didn t believe in the eye of the goddess but he didn t contradict me. He only asked, What if the prince sends ambassadors here to meet you?
Then I m ill and can t receive anyone. Send letters on my behalf if you need to. Don t break the betrothal and risk Locris. We will be back.
I d never seen my father look so sad, not even when we realized that Haemon was gone.
We will do our best to keep the home fires burning until you both return, Father said, leaning forward to kiss me on the forehead. Then he kissed Quynh s forehead as well. His voice broke when he said, My little flowers, you have always been so brave.
We will keep being brave, I said. And we will return.
Although he didn t say it, I saw from his face that he didn t believe me.
He kissed us again and told us to send for him if we needed him.
After he closed the door, I lay back and Quynh curled up next to me. I didn t know what to say to her. I wanted to make this better but realized I couldn t.
Maybe it s symbolic, she said. Maybe the chase is a ritual and there are dozens of Locrian maidens serving in the temple.
It s not symbolic. The traders at the docks had shared too many horror stories about what happened to the maidens. I wish that it was.
She didn t respond for so long that I thought she had fallen asleep, overcome by the day s events. But then she asked, Can I sleep in here?
Of course. When Quynh had first joined our family, she had been terrified of the dark. We had shared a bed for years after she d arrived.
And now we were about to head into the worst darkness imaginable.
If something happens to me, she said, and I am caught, you need to continue on without me.
That wasn t even a possibility. If you are caught, I will stay and help you. I will protect you.
Lia, not even you can fight an entire army by yourself.
Maybe not, but I was going to try.
It didn t take long for her to fall asleep, her breathing evening out. I envied her the chance to escape for a few hours.
I would have to strategize alone. But no matter how much I tried to figure out a way for us to live, I kept going back to Demaratus s words from a year ago.
That I wouldn t be able to save us both.
A few hours later our older sister sneaked into my room. Lia?
I m awake, I said. She made her way over to my bed while I sat up. She hugged me fiercely, burying her face in my neck.
I can t believe this is happening, she said.
Neither can I.
She released me, leaning back to peer into my face. How are you?
I m fine. And it was partially true. Because it was imperative that I regain control of myself and my emotions.
Quynh s life depended on my ability to do so. To plan, to find a way out of this situation.
You re doing better than our parents, she said. I ve been sitting with Mother, who can t stop crying. Every time she gets up to come see you, she collapses again. The physician just arrived to tend to her. Father has shut himself up in his library with his advisers and lawyers so they can find some way out of this.
They won t. If the tribute could be circumvented, someone would have figured it out in the last thousand years.
Well, I m not going to give up hope. We still have until morning.
I hadn t given up hope. I was being realistic. I need to ask you for two favors.
She squeezed my hands. Anything.
The first is that Grandmother left me a book about worshipping the goddess and other banned religious stories from our history. It is in the bottom step of the temple. The stair is fake and there is a box inside of it. Grandmother wanted me to pass the book along to the next generation, to learn the stories for myself, and if the worst does happen, I have to give that legacy to you.
You won t-
The second thing, I said, interrupting her, is about your betrothed. Lykaon. He is a dangerous man. I told her what he had done to me and Hippolyta.
Her mouth hung open. It was a testament to our closeness that she immediately believed me.
You must never be alone with him, I said. Ever. For any reason. I don t care what he says or promises or threatens. Always have Father or one of the guards with you. Someone who can physically stop him if necessary.
You re scaring me, she said, and her trembling voice proved her words.
But it was a good thing for her to be scared. She was too naive, too trusting. Maybe he won t hit you. I m not willing to take that chance, though. I wasn t going to tell her about Jason s prediction that Lykaon would kill her after she gave him an heir. There was only so much Kallisto would be able to handle and I was already pushing up against that line.
Her hands had gone clammy in mine, affirming that I was right to keep the worst part to myself.
Kalli, I said.
She glanced up at me in surprise. I hadn t used her nickname since we were small. But I needed her to know how important this next part was.
You have to delay the wedding. Give me six months. I will come back with the eye of the goddess and restore Locris.
Lia, you can t possibly believe in that-
I do believe! Someone has to or else we re all doomed. I gripped her hands tightly. Six months. Tell him that you have to finish your dress before you wed him. And then every night undo whatever you ve woven that day. Anything to delay.
I d already lost Haemon, might potentially lose Quynh. I wasn t going to let Kallisto be destroyed by an evil man.
Swear it to me, I said.
I swear it. Six months.
A sigh of relief escaped me. One less thing to worry about. It wasn t in her nature to scheme or lie, but she had sworn it to me, and Kallisto always kept her word.
I should go check on Mother, she said.
I nodded and we hugged before she quietly left my room.
When the door shut and the darkness enveloped me again, I knew that I should try to sleep. I needed it.
But it eluded me. I lay there with my eyes wide open, staring at the ceiling. There were only a few hours before the sun would rise and it would be time to leave.
I had to hope that the arrival of the dawn would bring me a solution to keep both Quynh and me safe.