CHAPTER FORTY-TWO
Why do you need a Locrian sailor if you don t intend to leave? he asked.
This night was going to drag on so slowly if I kept avoiding his questions. I d seen him fight-he wasn t the kind to give up. He might also prove useful in helping me locate the right messenger. He knew the docks far better than I did. In this instance I should share with him.
I want to send a message to Locris to let my parents know that I m alive. So I have to find someone I can trust, who will get there quickly.
You could trust me. I would deliver your message for you.
Not able to help myself, I let out a short bark of laughter. I barely know you.
You won t know this sailor you choose at all.
Yes, but he will be Locrian, which automatically makes him more trustworthy than you.
You already know me almost as well as anyone in this city. But if you feel that you don t, then you should get to know me, he offered. Ask me any question and I ll answer.
I had so many questions I wanted to ask him, but there had been one in particular that had plagued me since it had happened. When we were on the Nikos , why did the pirates throw red dirt onto the deck?
I don t know why. I don t know who they were.
Was he telling me the truth? I couldn t be certain. I stole a glance at his face. Why are you smiling like that?
Because if it were not for your insatiable curiosity, I think that you might never speak to me again.
You re right. Jason was only a means to an end. He was not someone that I would seek out for any other reason.
Even if my body currently had a thousand reasons why I should do just that.
Then I am thankful that the goddess gifted you with a fine intellect and a desire to understand exactly what things mean and why they happen. It makes me think I should hide things from you, just so that you ll seek me out.
That is not a good plan, I told him. I d rather suffer in ignorance than deliberately choose to spend time in your presence.
He held his arms wide, as if to say that I was doing just that-deliberately choosing to be with him.
Only so that you can show me the way to the docks, I wanted to protest but stayed quiet.
And by the way, I meant you should ask me a personal question and I ll answer it, he said.
There s nothing I want to know about you. Another lie.
As I ve just pointed out, that s untrue. Your curiosity won t allow it.
I pressed my lips together, in an attempt to hold my tongue, but he was right. I couldn t do it. How did you get that scar?
He reached up with the fingers of his right hand and traced the outline of the scar from his eye down to his chin. I found myself wanting to do it, too, and balled my hands into fists so that I wouldn t accidentally reach for him.
Last year I was involved with a woman who had a spiteful lover.
Was he serious? Or teasing me? It was impossible to tell. His words hadn t been intended to wound me, but they did. My response infuriated me. I didn t want to be jealous where he was concerned, but it kept happening.
I recognized the main entrance of the city and again I was forced to repress the memories that came rushing at me. We crossed the open field and I wouldn t let myself think of Quynh and me lining up here, the hope I d had that we would both make it.
Do you want to try one of the docked ships? Jason asked, and I was grateful that he was there, that he could help me to focus on what had to be done.
No. Let s go to a tavern. A man out having a good time with his fellow crew members would be easier to convince than a sober man bitter about having to stay at his post.
Jason stopped and folded his arms, widening his stance. I won t take you into a tavern at this time of night. Someone will insult your honor and then I ll be forced to take his life as retribution and I m too tired.
I can protect my own honor.
He nodded. I know. I saw. But taverns and inns are disreputable and the people who frequent them are not the kind a temple acolyte should consort with.
Don t you go to places like that?
Exactly, he answered with a grin.
I ll find a sailor on my own, I announced. You can go.
I felt his hand wrap around my forearm, tugging me back. I tried to ignore the way my skin burst into flame everywhere that his fingers made contact. Fine. If this is what you are going to do and I can t talk you out of it, I ll help you. I think the Golden Lamb is going to be our best bet. Follow me.
Jason released my arm and I found myself missing and craving his touch. The sooner he went on his way, the faster I would regain my peace of mind.
At least until tomorrow night, when I fell asleep again.
We came upon a tavern that seemed to be leaning, as if the sea winds had blown against it for so long that it could no longer stay upright. The building was weathered, the edges of the roof frayed where the salt had eaten it away. The sign hanging above the door had a gold sheep painted on it. Firelight illuminated the open windows and someone was speaking loudly.
Jason reached over to me and pulled the hood up over my head. I held my breath while he put it into place. Keep yourself covered up. I will find a reasonably sober Locrian for you.
Why can t I-
He put one finger over my lips and I was struck with the urge to draw it into my mouth. It did have the intended effect of quieting me. If the very drunk men in this room see how beautiful you are, you will receive a great deal of unwanted attention. While I know we can fight our way clear, tonight we should try to allow everyone to keep their blood inside their bodies, where it belongs. And the best way for that to happen is for you to wait for me in the back. Can you do that?
I nodded, my pulse thrumming inside me. He left his finger on my sensitized lips for a moment longer, briefly tracing the outer edge of my top lip before he seemed to remember himself and withdrew his hand.
Again I was left aching for him.
We went into the tavern, and I noticed an older man standing on a stool near the fireplace as he told a story to the enthralled crowd.
There were only male patrons in the tavern, and as Jason had predicted, they seemed very drunk. The whole place reeked of sweat, dirt, sea, and alcohol. I put my hand up to my nose, hoping to block out some of the smell.
He found us a table near the door and had me sit in the farthest corner, mostly cloaked in shadows. He sat down next to me, acting like a giant shield. I let my hood fall farther forward so that no part of my face would be visible.
Aren t you going to find a Locrian? I asked.
When the bard is done, he said.
What s a bard?
A storyteller. Many people can t read and someone has to carry on the stories. A bard travels the cities and the countryside, sharing his tales so that we don t forget. We need to wait for him to finish or else we re going to be dealing with a lot of very angry, inebriated men upset about their entertainment being interrupted.
A woman in a tunic so light that it left little to the imagination came over with two glasses of something that smelled sour. She held out her hand for payment while giving Jason an appraising look. He handed her a small silver coin from the pouch at his side.
I ll be done with work in two hours if you d like to meet me out back, she told him, and I found myself angrily tightening my fingers around the handle of my xiphos.
He just smiled at her and she went off to serve other customers.
Are you going to meet up with her? I hadn t meant to ask him that, especially given his knowing smirk.
Pay attention to the bard. You might learn something.
The man on the stool said, When the Great War was over, many men fled from Ilion after their defeat by the Achaeans. Several patrons booed and started naming off individual nations who had fought, including Locris.
I tried to move even farther into the shadows.
Those Ilionians, deprived of their homeland, traveled south to Caria. They were starving, thirsty. They claimed hospitality rights but they were turned away. In their righteous anger, they laid siege to the city. The Ilionians easily tunneled under the walls and overwhelmed the Carians. After they defeated the men, they forced the Carian women into marriage and started new families.
Against their will? someone called out.
Yes! the bard said. Which displeased the goddess greatly.
I understood that. Those poor women, compelled to marry the men who had slaughtered their husbands, fathers, sons, and brothers. I hoped the goddess took vengeance on those Ilionians.
The Carians did not share the faith of the Ilionians and tried to erase their beliefs. But the men were steadfast and would not forsake their goddess. Ten years passed away, and the Ilionians missed their previous home. Most of them abandoned their new families and returned, rightly guessing that the Achaeans had left and they could rebuild. They made the walls of Troas even higher and stronger, expanding the labyrinth so that no invader could do what they themselves had done in Caria. It is why no man may enter the temple of the goddess today. She is still angry with them for their treatment of the Carian women. And the Ilionian men s superior fighting skills and engineering capabilities are why, within a single decade, the entire nation of Caria was wiped out. We speak of them now only in stories.
I swallowed back the bile that rose up in my throat. That was going to happen to Locris if I didn t find a way to restore it. We would be nothing but a story for some bard to share in a tavern.
The bard got off the stool and began begging the crowd for money.
I wished I could get drunk, but I needed my wits about me. I sniffed the drink the barmaid had left us. What is this?
Beer.
Why does it smell like that? Like rotting bread?
I don t know how to answer that question. It just does. Stay here, I ll be back. I watched as he got up and started speaking to groups of men, clapping them on the back, buying them drinks, charming everyone he came into contact with.
Sitting here in the dark, I had to admit what I kept trying to reject. He was so desperately attractive. I wanted his mouth on mine, his fingers exploring my skin, his weight pressing down on me. A wave of desire crested up inside me and I wrapped my hands around my drink to steady myself.
I wondered why it was so important to the goddess that I not lie with a man if she let me have these kinds of feelings for one.
Expelling a shaky breath, I tried to stop myself from following his every movement, but it wasn t working. Everything he did was utterly fascinating. The way his mouth formed words, how his muscles flexed in the firelight, the sheer delight in his laughter.
Why was he helping me? Did he feel guilty about what had happened with Quynh and the inadvertent role he d played in it? My mind wanted to be suspicious, but I couldn t think of what he had to gain from assisting me.
The one thing I might have to offer, he couldn t have.
Thanks to his jest earlier, I knew that he was aware of the vows that the goddess required. And he might have been a gambling philanderer, but I sensed that there was at least a tiny shard of morality in him. I suspected that he would honor my promises.
Especially given that he was aware of how capable I was of defending myself.
Although I would not want to try hand-to-hand combat against him. I would most likely lose.
I was not goddess-blessed. My skills had been acquired through practice and training, and his came naturally.
It was unfair.
But I had learned a long time ago that life generally wasn t kind.
Jason approached the table with another man and, with a broad smile, announced, I have found you a Locrian.