Chapter 4
FOUR
HARPER
“What are you doing in here?” Phoenix’s deep voice finally echoed from behind me. My heart began to thump a steady rhythm, and my pulse took off. I suddenly felt as if I had been plugged into the mains as heat charged through me. “I thought you hated it in here?”
I was in the den, and I did. The place usually reeked, either of testosterone, general ass-hole-ness, or the shit they smoked.
I had been waiting in that pit for him for ages, which was why I was annoyed.
Well, that and the fact that I found out earlier that kids had broken into my old home.
They hadn’t made it as far as my bedroom, but they’d graffitied in what was left of the kitchen; trespassing scumbags.
I wondered if they knew that people had died in there?
Radcliff Manor was now a condemned building and had been awaiting demolition for years.
It was supposed to be a secure site. Only I knew about the secret entrance.
It appeared someone had pounded some of the boarding loose since my last visit.
They had also left joint butts everywhere, and I hated smoking for obvious reasons.
“Earth to Harper?” Phoenix huffed as he moved to stand beside me.
“I’m reading,” I pointed out with a glance that suggested I thought him stupid.
“I can see that. What are you reading?” Nix rumbled, feigning interest over my shoulder.
“Dur, a book,” I snarked, seeing his strong thighs flex. “But don’t worry, I won’t leave it in here. Wouldn’t want to find it in the trash.” I could feel his eyes burning into the side of my face. I brought up the Harry Potter atrocity on purpose.
I was sitting in one of the sofa chairs in their den with my feet up. I knew it was boys’ territory, but it was the first place Nix would come when he got in.
The well-read copy of The Hunger Games I was clutching was merely a prop; I wasn’t reading it. I was there for another reason. I needed to speak with Phoenix before dinner. And now I didn’t know what to say. I felt tongue-tied.
“Is it a good book?”
“Yes, you wouldn’t understand it, though. It doesn’t come with pictures in it.”
Nix huffed past me and moved around the coffee table, which sat in the middle of the leather chairs. “Fuck me, Harper. It’s just a question. Why do you have to be such a smartass all the time?”
Looking up, I closed the book as he continued to chew me out. “I don’t think I’ve ever met anyone as argumentative as you.”
That got my back up, considering his cold-shoulder treatment. I’d established that being bossed around was better than being ignored. Fuck him and the high horse he rode in on.
“What do you expect when you don’t even say hi to me. I haven’t seen you for days. You maul me in your bedroom one night and then disappear without the hint of an apology,” I rasped moodily.
His brow creased. “I’d hardly use the word maul, and why would I apologize?”
So, he did remember the kiss. Relief jetted through me.
“It would be the gentlemanly thing to do,” I replied tartly, masking my joy.
“Since when was I ever a gentleman?” Nix snorted.
The guy had a point.
I leveled him a look. Blast, he was tall when I was sitting, and he was standing.
The beauty of the man was obscene. I wanted to keep talking about the kiss.
“Well, you certainly weren’t on Saturday night.
Do you kiss all the girls like you're tackling a wild boar?” I provoked him on purpose to get a rise out of him, maybe force him to admit something real for once.
I could see he was agitated as his hand lifted to the back of his neck. “We’ve been through this. If you didn’t enjoy it, you shouldn’t have kissed me back,” he puffed, massaging his skin with his fingers.
“You’re right, I shouldn’t have,” I agreed, hating that he knew I was with him all the way. That must have shown on my face.
“Your self-loathing is so fucking loud,” Nix sneered, shaking his head. “Just make peace with the fact that you loved it.”
I moodily rolled my shoulders. “You took me by surprise—and as I said, I could have been thinking of someone else,” I reminded him bitchily.
He lowered his hand and folded his arms, staring down his perfect nose at me. “Sure, like who?” He was so cocky.
I smiled back at him in a taunting way. “Why should I tell you?”
His expression darkened. “Because I’m telling you to. How can I break his jaw if I don’t know who it is?” A thrill at the thought of him being jealous swept through me.
“Who says it’s a guy?” I teased with a flash of my eyes. Take that!
With an elongated sigh, he dropped his arms, moving back to the three-seater sofa where I was sitting.
“Funny. Move the fuck up. Why are you reading in here anyway? If I remember correctly, you said something about having to drag your cold, hard body through the door the last time we invited you to join us.”
Had I really been that dramatic?
I shifted to the far side of the sofa, allowing space for his big body, stating, “The room is fine. It’s the company that sucks.”
My words didn’t penetrate his thick hide as usual. I narrowed my eyes as he shrugged. “Sounds like a you problem.”
“I don’t mind it in here when it’s free from annoying boys.”
“Suggesting I am one of those boys?”
“If the cap fits,”
“Then go to your room.”
“I’m not sure it’s safe. Who knows who is lurking in the shadows, ready to attack?” I purposefully drew my legs towards my chest, curling up even more so my feet didn’t touch his thighs.
“I didn’t attack you.”
“You held my wrists above my head,” I pointed out.
My words must have affected him as I saw his thighs flex. I knew he got off on restraining girls during sex, with their permission, of course. I knew Phoenix wasn’t the type of guy to force that shit on a girl if she wasn’t into it. If I had struggled when he’d held me, I knew he would have let go.
His loud sigh erupted around the small space. “I don’t have the strength to fight with you tonight, Harper.”
“Then don’t. Keep your distance, unless you want to get burned.”
“Fine,” he stated moodily, shoving to his feet. I watched as he threw himself into the chair opposite. The leather squeaked with his weight. He clearly agreed that the space between us was best. I was dying to glance at his crotch, but managed to stop myself.
Nix pinned me with a look. “OK. I’m sorry, alright. I apologize for kissing you.”
That pissed me off even more. And no, I wasn’t PMS-ing!
“You don’t need to be sorry for the kiss, Phoenix. You need to be sorry for believing I was that skank, Courtney Swan.”
Dashing a hand down his face, he snapped. “I can’t win with you. I was drunk, what do you want me to say?”
“You were out of control, Phoenix. That’s what happens when you soak your brain with whisky. I’m surprised you can even remember it.”
“Oh, I remember, baby girl. Maybe I knew you weren’t Courtney.”
My eyes darted nervously towards his face. That was unexpected, although typical that he said maybe. Phoenix was a master of not giving you a straight answer.
“So why didn’t you stop when you realized?
” I questioned, quickly glancing towards the doorway to make sure no one was there.
If Ma heard, we were both screwed. Our foster mother would not condone anything of that nature happening in her house, especially not between us.
When she’d first brought me to live there, her rules had been clear: absolutely no fraternizing.
As I turned back, Nix’s next words almost made me speechless. Almost. “Maybe I was enjoying myself too much?”
The glint in his eyes suggested he was winding me up. “Maybe? Can you ever answer a question directly?” I huffed in frustration.
And then I felt a mixture of joy and surprise as he said. “OK. I was enjoying myself too much.”
A funny feeling fluttered in my stomach, and I shifted nervously under his scrutiny. “Right. Err, OK. I don’t know what to say to that.”
I had to believe that. Phoenix didn’t just shoot his mouth off; every word was planned with an ulterior motive. And I’d felt how the kiss made him feel against my stomach that night. But he still hadn’t confirmed whether his enjoyment was Courtney or me-shaped. Damn the man.
An uncomfortable silence entered the space as Phoenix leaned his head back against his seat and closed his eyes. “How about we just forget about it. You’re a girl, I’m a guy, these things happen,” he sighed, motioning back and forth between us with his hand.
I allowed my gaze to run up and down his body whilst his eyes were closed.
He looked like he’d slept in his clothes, and I felt a twinge of remorse.
Nothing good would come out of fighting all the time, and the sexual thing needed to take a hike.
No matter how much we wanted it. “Well, it can’t happen again,”
Nix’s eyes shot open and he sat up, resting his huge arms on his thighs. “You bet your ass it can’t happen again. Ma would kick me out.”
“Rubbish, it’s more likely I’d be sent back into the system.”
“That too,” he replied, his tone suggesting that wasn’t something he’d want.
I lifted the book from my lap and placed it on the coffee table as we watched each other.
“So, what do we do? Just ignore it?” I questioned, running my hands down my jean-clad legs. I noticed how his eyes dipped towards that movement before he leveled me with a look.
“Ignore it?” he questioned, looking puzzled.
Stretching my arms out, I shrugged. “Yes. Ignore this weird thing we have going on.” I was so confused, I wanted him to touch me and to stay away from me at the same time. It made no sense.
Phoenix clearly had no problem with it. “Why is it weird? It’s the most natural thing in the world. It’s called mutual attraction, Harper. We’re not kids anymore.”
“So, you think I’m pretty?” I said in a soft voice, needing some validation. Pathetic, I know.