Chapter 21 #2
“Yeah, because, as I said, it’s not just sex,” he explained, and I believed him.
His words sent a thrill through me, and I felt my heart swell in my chest. How had I managed to stay away from this man for so long? And he had just admitted something to me.
Phoenix does care.
Those perfect three words were on the tip of my tongue. It was my moment. And then it was ruined as Reed came thundering into the room. “Is that burritos I can smell?”
Nix and I glanced at Reed as he threw himself into a spare chair and picked up half of the burrito on my plate. “Waste not want not,” he said with a smirk.
Reed’s appearance broke through our special moment, but not all was lost.
I didn’t feel uncomfortable, and the conversation between us all flowed fine. It was like nothing had changed with Reed in the room.
We spoke about Ma, saying how we would keep our relationship private for the time being. Reed asked how Nix was feeling about his father, and we all agreed that he shouldn’t keep that from Ma.
Reed said he hadn’t heard from Storm, and I told him about the messages from Molly. I could see he was upset that she hadn’t reached out to him, but I didn’t say anything.
“She knows where I am if she wants to talk. Besides, Coach said he needs to see me about something important. He’s volunteering over at Egerton Elementary, and I’m to meet him there at two, so we’d better motor, Nix. If you still need me to spot you at the gym?”
“What does Coach want to see you about?” Nix asked, pushing to his feet.
Reed shrugged as he stood. “No idea. But it sounded important.”
My boyfriend grunted, “It always is with Coach.”
Nix then asked if I wanted a lift to the gym. I sometimes attended the yoga classes there, but I declined and decided to use the day to study and hang out with Micah. He was due to return to New York the following day, and I’d hardly seen him.
We tidied up the breakfast pots together as Reed went to get changed for the gym.
At the front door, Phoenix pulled me into his arms and kissed me.
“Do you fancy going to the movies later. A first date type of thing?”
“Yes, that would be great.”
And that is exactly what we did, and our night at the movies was perfect for what was hopefully one of many dates.
* * * * *
The next week was crazy. Mine and Nix’s relationship amounted to us seeing each other behind Ma’s back, which I hated in the end.
It was like carrying around another lie.
She wasn’t stupid either. I didn’t miss the way she watched us at the dinner table.
As well as the lingering looks, Nix and I were getting along, and so she must have known something was off.
During a lengthy chat in my room one night whilst listening to music, Phoenix and I had the chance to talk and lay some of our demons to rest. I told him about how hard it had been when he left the Jacksons.
I even explained what had happened with Dalton that horrible night in my room.
I could see Nix was angry, his jaw ticking with every word I spoke, but he managed to hold back.
I told him how Dalton had pinned me on the bed and tried to kiss me.
I remember him roughly pawing my breast through my nightclothes and grinding his mouth over mine.
Fortunately, Daisy had come into my room to borrow something and had caught him.
It was the only time she had ever been on my side.
We never told Mr. and Mrs. Jackson, and he didn’t try it again, but the bullying got worse.
Eventually, the term of foster care for the twins came to an end, and they were placed with a permanent family.
It was one they could stay with until they were old enough to emancipate at eighteen.
And for a few months, everything was normal for a change.
Phoenix and I were chilling out on my bed when I had the perfect opportunity to tell him about my problem.
He asked why I left the Jacksons, and I explained that it was because I had been accused of stealing.
At the end of that conversation, Phoenix was agitated, saying how he’d like to visit the Jacksons one day.
He didn’t need to add a footnote to that; the threat was apparent from his tone.
He also told me that if he ever saw Dalton again, he’d kick the shit out of him. That I would have liked to have seen.
My tongue had felt heavy in my mouth at the point where I should have confessed that the Jacksons' accusations were, in fact, true. It had been on the tip of my tongue as I’d turned in his arms to tell him and say that it was something I still did, like a sickness.
But after having to hide Phoenix in my closet as Ma knocked on the door, it fell by the wayside.
Once she’d gone and he remerged again, our conversation changed back to the fact that we were lying to the woman who was our mother figure. A woman who had been so good to me since I had started living with them.
Phoenix wanted us to tell her about us, but I couldn’t face it. It was the worry of how she would react that kept me silent.
I knew Ma cared for me, but the thought of Phoenix and me being separated again was what worried me.
Nix promised me that it would never happen and that Ma wouldn’t do that, but I’d had so much disappointment in my life that I couldn’t bring myself to believe it.
Nix said he supported that decision. Our relationship was still so new, and I didn’t want anything to spoil it.
And there was an element of excitement to sneaking around.
We hadn’t had sex again since that first time, but there had been plenty of stolen kisses and other bursts of fooling around.
As far as I was concerned, I only had that one last demon to slay, and Nix, well, he hadn’t gotten over the father thing yet. He’d also had no contact with Storm. None of us had, apart from Molly.
Nix had spoken to Ma about his dad and Storm.
She had been both shocked and upset. He’d also told her about his surprise visit to his mother and half-brother (something she was already aware of).
Phoenix and Alex texted each other a few times, but hadn’t arranged to meet up. It was all very complicated and awkward.
One night, Dominic Summers turned up at our house asking to see Phoenix.
We were both in his room at the time, but Nix asked Ma to send him away.
He still wasn’t ready for that conversation, and I totally understood why.
Summers also turned up at his college a couple of times, and again, Nix had managed to dodge him.
Micah had gone back to New York, and Hudson spent most evenings with the Millers.
Reed was unusually quiet and wasn’t himself at all.
He’d also lost his appetite, which was a major red flag that he wasn’t right.
Molly had explained that Storm had left town and was staying with her aunt in Jacksonville.
She had not attempted to contact Nix and was clearly still ghosting Reed.
He was hurting, and if you tried to speak to him about it, all you got back were grunts and nods.
On the upside, Reed’s meeting with Coach had been to discuss his future football career.
It turned out that someone saw him play at the game the previous weekend and was impressed.
Another step on that path towards a probable shot at playing pro football.
I walked to school with Molly most days, seeing Phoenix briefly at breakfast before the boys left in the Jeep for college. And we spent time together in my room.
Over that first week, life had fallen into a pattern, and it was more than good.
Until it wasn’t.
PHOENIX
“Still no response from Storm?” Hudson asked Reed as he joined us in the den. It was Friday night, and we had the house to ourselves. Ma was away again, looking after her sick friend. Reed shook his head with a moody expression.
Molly and Harper were cooking dinner. Something none of us were looking forward to, considering the girls couldn’t cook for shit.
My suggestion that takeout was safer had been rudely rebuffed by Harper, who had taken my gentle reminder of the time she gave us all the shits like a personal attack.
I was in the process of beating Reed on the Xbox whilst cursing my stupid mouth.
If I didn’t get any that night, I knew I only had myself to blame.
My girl was still a mixture of sweet and sour, and fuck me if I didn’t lap that shit up. Every day together was so different; Harper kept me on my toes and ran rings around me more than anyone else on the planet. And I was thoroughly enjoying the ride.
Over the last week, we hung out in each other’s rooms, went to the movies a couple of times, met up for lunch, and took a ride out to the beach on the occasions when I’d been able to steal Reed’s keys.
After Storm went AWOL, the fucker was moping like the best of them. The only way we’d gotten him to come out of his room and into the den was by Hudson’s threatening to kick his ass. He wasn’t eating either, which wasn’t a good thing.
“How’s dinner coming along?” I asked as Hudson launched himself into one of the leather sofas and watched us play.
Reed’s tongue was hanging out of his mouth, but from concentration, nothing to do with watering at what was usually his favorite word.
“The kitchen looks like a fucking warzone,” Hudson explained, rubbing his temple like he had a headache.