Chapter 22
TWENTY-TWO
HARPER
Phoenix and I showered together in the bathroom, and that nervousness I’d felt at being naked in front of him vanished. The spray was so refreshing, and I noticed the way Nix stared as it rained over my breasts and down my stomach, his eyes hooded, attempting to give nothing away.
Watching the water as it poured over his chest and ran in rivulets past his abs made me horny again. Especially when I saw his cock was hard. I loved how his body couldn’t lie. As I looked up, he gave me one of those incredibly sexy grins that wreaked havoc on my heart.
“Don’t get any ideas, I’m exhausted,” he explained with a commanding air that made my sex flutter.
I gave him a look to say, ‘Would I?’
Nix then got to work, sponging me down and washing my hair. He was extremely thorough, like he had done it a million times. I washed his back, biting my lips as I took in his strong buttocks.
After turning off the shower and toweling each other dry, we then got dressed in our nightclothes.
I wore a striped navy and white pajama shorts set, and Nix tugged on gym shorts. As I left him in the bathroom so he could brush his teeth, I padded barefoot back to my room. I felt so tired, the sex between us had been frantic and uncaged, and I decided I was going to tell him how I felt.
As I closed my closet door, I turned at the sound of Nix coming into my room.
“Will you sleep here tonight?” I asked, and he glanced up from his cell.
“Baby, there’s nowhere else I’d rather be.”
Biting back an ooh of pleasure, I smiled and walked over to the bed, climbing onto one side. I had changed the sheets so they were fresh and free from the evidence of our frantic coupling.
Phoenix placed his cell on my nightstand as I asked. “Is everything OK?”
“Yeah. Molly and Hudson just got back. Reed is with them. It’s all good.”
We both climbed under the comforter and sat up against the pillows, briefly talking about his looming visit with his father. Nix said he was more than ready to see him, whether that was to give the guy a chance or to shoot him down; he explained he wasn’t sure.
After around an hour, I turned the lamps off and nestled back against Phoenix as he spooned me. “You smell like a wet dream,” he whispered against my neck.
I sighed, allowing him to wrap his strong arms around me, my body delicate in all my most intimate places.
Once his breathing became deeper, signalling sleep, I wrapped my fingers around his arm and confessed.
“I love you.”
* * * * *
The first thing I noticed when I started to come around was that I was alone. Slowly opening my eyes, I slid my arm over to the other side of the bed, feeling that it was cold and empty. Again.
Damn it. What was it about Phoenix and his disappearing act?
I had been looking forward to waking up in his arms. I liked cuddles, at least, I did when they were Phoenix-shaped.
I clearly had to work harder on encouraging smooches in bed with my boyfriend.
Checking the clock on my wall, it was past noon.
As I rolled over and pushed up into a sitting position, Nix was sitting at the bottom of the bed with his head in his hands, and panic washed up through my chest.
“Hey,” I began, moving the covers and shuffling down the mattress to place my hand on his shoulder. “You should have woken me.” He was probably dreading the meeting with his old man later that day.
“Did you sleep OK?”
“Yeah, not bad. You?”
I grinned. “Like a baby, hence the lateness of the hour.”
Dropping his hands, he mirrored my smile. “I just have a headache. Probably a combination of the thought of seeing my father and too much whisky. Do you have any Tylenol?” he asked with a grimace, squeezing my hand and then pushing to his feet.
I gave him a warm look of understanding. “Yes, of course. There are painkillers in my nightstand, top drawer. Take what you need,” I replied, sliding my legs off the mattress.
This time, I wasn’t naked; I’d pulled on one of Nix’s tops earlier that morning. It was a black tee that said Nine Inch Nails on the front, and I had started wearing it to sleep in. The days were getting chillier, and Ma didn’t start putting the heating back on until the end of November.
November? It made me think about my forthcoming birthday.
As Phoenix moved away to the nightstand, I couldn’t help but stare at his ass; the way the muscles of his buns flexed with each step.
He was wearing jeans and had left them unbuttoned, and was again damp and topless. He was so broad and strong, and I longed to trace the contours of his shoulders.
Clambering around, I started to repair last night’s mess.
“The fuck,” Nix huffed under his breath, drawing my focus back. He was standing with his hand in the drawer, and his body was suddenly rigid.
“Everything OK?” I called over, pulling on fresh panties.
At my voice, Phoenix turned slowly to face me, holding something in his hand. “What’s this?” he questioned, raising a picture frame.
And. Fuck. My heart stalled in my chest.
I worried my lip, the entire room spinning as I peered down at his hand, where Nix clutched the photo frame of his brother and mother. The very one I had stolen from their house.
As my eyes shifted back to his, I knew horror must have been written along every crease in my face, and my mouth dropped open as Nix took a step towards me. “Where did you get this?” he asked, raising the frame.
Just tell him the truth! My conscience screamed. I had mentally prepared myself for that moment so many times, but just then, I couldn’t handle it. I was tongue-tied.
“Err, I don’t know.”
His expression turned deadly serious. “Bullshit. You know this is Alex and my mother, right?”
“I’ve never met your mom,” I stuttered.
“No, but you’ve met my brother.”
He had a point, of course. My mouth felt dry, and my heart was pounding behind my ribs. I dropped my gaze to the small rug that sat on the floor in the center of my room.
“Look at me, Harper. What the fuck?” he repeated with a steely tone.
Swallowing, my pulse went into overdrive, and not in a good way, I lifted my chin. “I—It’s from your mom’s house. It’s a family picture.”
“Yes. I can see that. My question is, why is it here?” he said, shaking the picture at me.
My lungs almost packed up. “I have something to tell you.”
“I’ll say,” he snorted, dashing a hand across his unshaven jaw. It made him look rough and dangerous, and the way he was watching me made me more nervous.
“I don’t know where to start.”
Nix’s eyes narrowed, and he turned to place the picture on the top of the nightstand. “Start at the beginning,” he suggested grimly as he twisted back and folded his arms.
And the floodgates opened as I confessed everything.
Phoenix looked astounded as he leaned back against the dresser and glared at me, attempting to take in everything I was telling him. I could see the muscle in his jaw working overtime. That happened when he was annoyed.
I managed to hold back my tears as I explained how I had started taking other people's stuff when I lived at the Jacksons. I explained that it gave me a sense of control and that I thrived on the rush it gave me. When I said it out loud, it sounded crazy, and I felt like an even bigger freak.
Eventually, after a few choice curses and a moment of stony silence, he stated. “So, the designer purse in there isn’t yours either, I take it?”
“No, I took that from Tate last year.”
Shaking his head in disgust, he rasped in disbelief. “Tate Parker, so you stole in High School?”
“Yes. I found it hard to stop. It became a habit,” I pointed out, screwing up my nose. My palms felt clammy as they sat by my sides, and I felt exposed wearing only Nix’s T-shirt. My confidence was evaporating by the second.
“I thought you said it started at the Jacksons’ place?”
“It did, and I did manage to stop for a few years, and then when I came back here, it started up again.”
“But why?”
“I don’t know, I guess I felt alone again. And you treated me so differently.”
“So, you stole for attention?” he said, incredulously. “You took your chances stealing shit at school; there used to be cameras everywhere. And Tate Parker, that purse must be worth thousands of dollars, are you nuts?”
“I know it’s wrong, OK.”
“Did you take shit from your other friends?”
“Tate Parker was never my friend, and I’m not sorry I stole that; she deserved to have something taken from her.”
“Did you ever steal from inside the family?”
“No, never,” I rasped, telling the truth.
Phoenix looked up at the ceiling in a ‘God give me strength’ motion, and I felt more shame pump through me.
He’s never going to look at you the same way again. You’re a dirty little thief.
Huffing and shaking his head, he said beneath his breath. “This is so fucked up.”
I watched as Phoenix started to pace, his body language showing how angry he was, and I knew I’d let him down.
“You know there’s a name for people who take shit for the sake of it?”
I backed away unsteadily as he stalked towards me.
“Yes, I’m aware.”
“I can’t get my head around it. You’re a fucking klepto, Harper,” Nix snarled, stopping in front of me and taking me by the arms. He wasn’t rough, but his hold was tight. Phoenix was all hard lines and muscle; his jaw continued to tick as he glared down at me.
“Look, I know it’s wrong, and I’m dealing with it. I was going to tell you, but it never seemed like the right time.”
He shook me once and then pulled me forward as he got in my face. “Where’s all the shit you’ve taken over the years?” It took my breath away.
“Please, let go,” I pleaded as his grip tightened. “You're hurting my arms.”
My comment seemed to knock sense into him as he glanced at his fingers.
Thankfully, he released me straight away and stepped back like he needed to distance himself.
I raised my hands, trying to reassure him. “I’m going to deal with it, Nix. I promise. I can stop, I know I can. And with your help…”