Chapter 12
Chapter
Twelve
Istay up nearly the whole night talking with Soren, explaining my situation, my history with my sister, asking if he knows the reason he was called to me.
He’d explained that he hadn’t heard a voice, exactly, but something inside of him awoke with knowledge of me and how to find me, a piece of himself that was connected to me and would be forever rising up and helping to guide him.
I had sort of been hoping that the Makers had given him a full explanation in great detail of what in the fucking hells was happening, and I do get the feeling that he knows more than he’s letting on, but for now, he’s only sharing that he was called to find me, so he did. Simple as that.
I still don’t quite know how to handle having a familiar or the intense power simmering deep in my chest, stronger than I’ve ever felt.
Blackheart had been watching me curiously throughout the rest of the day until we made camp, but I’m not sure if it was because he could feel the increase in strength or just because he was still reeling from Soren’s appearance, from the knowledge that familiars aren’t just the legends we all thought.
Walking back to the rest of the group with a frost cat in tow was…
well, if I thought I’d gained attention as Tesni when I first arrived, it was nothing compared to this.
Half of the soldiers looked like they might piss themselves, while others watched in reverent awe at Soren as we walked up the line towards our horses, some even bowing their heads and putting fists to their hearts.
Some of the horses were skittish at first, but settled after a time, and Zaro didn’t seem to care at all.
By the time we made camp, the entire army had gotten word about Soren and our bond, and the whispers were so loud I’d hidden in my tent as soon as it was up and ready.
I was starting to become commonplace here, no one really paying me much attention anymore which is how I liked it, but now?
Everyone is looking, and the harder people look, the more the cracks in this house of lies will spread.
Mia had spent most of the evening with us, already completely smitten with her new companion, and Soren seems equally enamored.
He’d been perfectly content to let Mia stroke his ears and lean against his massive body until she’d fallen asleep.
Odessa had hoisted the girl up without waking her, as if she’d done it a thousand times.
“You don’t know any other familiars by chance, do you?
” I ask him now, the morning coming all too quickly.
He stares at me with those icy eyes, clearly saying that that is a horrifically stupid question.
“Ok, ok, don’t answer that.” I rub my eyes and flop back onto my pillow.
“I just wish I knew why you were sent to me, why the Makers chose to bring us together now. Why me?”
-The reason will make itself known when it is time. Until then, we travel north.-
“And what happens when we get there?” I whisper, not really looking to him for an answer.
-What is meant to happen.-
He seems to believe that everything has happened for a reason, that we are all part of a great plan that the Makers have put into place, including Tesni betraying me again and putting me on this path.
I can’t deny that part of me might even believe it too.
After all, if I’d never gone to see Tesni, if I was never put in her place in that carriage, I would never have been in a place to find Soren, and though it’s so new, barely hours, really, it feels as if this bond has been in place since the day I was born, maybe even longer than that.
It’s hard to explain, but I can’t help but be a little thankful to the treacherous bitch that is my twin for bringing me here.
I turn to look at Soren where he’s lounging on a pile of furs on the other side of the small tent.
He said he didn’t need them, but didn’t complain too much once I put them down and he settled upon them.
If it bothers him to lay on another animal’s hide, he doesn’t show it.
Maybe he hates bears and is perfectly happy to sleep on top of his fallen foes.
Maybe I need sleep. As if on cue, I yawn widely.
-Sleep.-
My eyes are already sliding closed, so I whisper goodnight inside his head and drift off feeling more at ease than I have in my entire life.
“Can you feel it?” I ask Blackheart a few days later as we finally near Tithmoore.
“Feel what?”
“My Gift. Or everyone’s Gifts, rather. I mean, how does your Gift work, exactly?
” I honestly don’t really expect him to answer, but I’ve been burning to know and now seems like as good of a time as any to ask.
His brow furrows, as if he’s never been asked the question before and isn’t quite sure how to answer, which gives me hope that perhaps he will.
It takes him a minute, but he finally speaks.
“Every Gifted has a sort of energy that regular people don’t. I can sense it. Feel it, like you said.”
“So, you could stare into a sea of people and know if there were Gifteds hidden within? Because you could sense this energy?”
“Mostly, yes.”
“And you can just choose which energies you let past your wall, so to speak?”
“It’s quite a talent, don’t you think?” he asks with a cocky smirk and I roll my eyes. “Yes, I can choose which Gifts to let pass.”
I think about that, trying to imagine wielding such a Gift, and quickly thank the Makers that it isn’t mine.
I suppose here on the road or within the camp it might not be so difficult, with only a handful of Gifteds, but what about when he’s home in Duskthorne?
He’d be surrounded by hundreds upon hundreds of Gifteds if the rumors of Dorian’s collection are to be believed.
I would think that would be…overwhelming to say the least. The more I think about his Gift, the more questions I have, so I keep pushing, wondering if there’s a limit to how much information he’ll share.
Things have shifted subtly between us, but not so much to call us friends who have casual chats.
“And how do you do that? Know which Gift you’re letting through?”
“It’s a bit hard to explain, but each person, each Gift, has a different…feel to it.”
I blink at that. “So…everyone’s energies feel different to you? I feel different than Cookie?” He nods. Overwhelming was perhaps an understatement for how he must feel back at Duskthorne.
“Is my energy different now since I’ve bonded?
” He opens his mouth to answer but someone calls for him and he sighs, seeming frustrated to end our conversation.
I’d be lying if I said I didn’t share the sentiment, not just because I’m intensely interested in his Gift, but because I am a fucking idiot and just like talking to him.
“I have to go, but we can continue this later.” I nod, the fact that he doesn’t seem to have hit any limits on sharing with me about his Gift making me happier than it should. He inclines his head and rides off.
-interesting…-
-I’m learning valuable information about our enemy, that’s all.-
-More lies from my fated soul-bound,- he says with mock disappointment and hurt.
I glare at the cat and he laughs inside my mind while he growls softly at me out loud, flashing his fangs.
Having him with me is still a little strange, yet so much a part of me already that I can’t imagine being separated from him.
I never could have imagined having conversations with an animal, sharing secrets and learning about each others’ lives, but it feels as easy as doing so with a friend.
He slinks off into the woods as he’s prone to do during our travels.
He likes to take to the trees sometimes to check for any dangers our, er I mean, Duskthorne’s scouts may have missed.
Plus, just because he’s my familiar now doesn’t mean he isn’t still a frost cat.
He still hunts and lurks and speaks to the other animals, as he did long before I came into his life.
He’s at home in these woods and I suddenly worry how he’ll cope when—if? —we ever return to Helios.
-I think I’d rather enjoy seeing these white beaches you spoke of, not to worry.-
It seems that short distances make no impact on our ability to communicate, which eases my mind whenever he does go on his little adventures away from me. I smile and Odessa pulls her horse up beside my own.
“What are you smiling about?”
“Just imagining Soren lounging on the beaches in Helios.”
She frowns. “Have you ever been there?”
“Oh, of course not,” I say quickly, waving that away. “They never seemed to be in need of my services, so Barony and I never traveled there.” I shrug. “But I’ve heard stories and seen paintings and for some reason I was just picturing Soren there on a beach beside the palms.”
She seems to be trying to imagine it herself and then huffs out a laugh. “It is a funny thing to imagine. I would love to go there one day. Maybe after the war is done.”
“You’ve never been either?”
She shakes her head. “No, coming to Karthania with this contingent is the farthest I’ve ever traveled from Duskthorne.
” I’ve learned that they came at the request of Queen Nicolette, to discuss the possibility of her kingdom leaving the Alliance and joining Duskthorne, but it was apparently a waste of time.
“My mother’s people came from Sol generations back though.
Many settled in Helios as well. It was my father’s family that came from the north and despite her love of the sun, mum loved him more and never went back.
” She smiles sadly and then shakes herself.
“I feel like going there will help me feel closer to her again,” she admits quietly.
She glances at me sidelong. “Is that stupid?”