Chapter 16 #2
I watch Holiday light up around my family, like she used to, like she’s craving genuine conversations and appreciation. I think about her ex and clench my fists, thinking about what I’ll do when I meet him. Because now it’s inevitable that I will.
We settle around Mawmaw’s massive dining table that can fit twenty people. Holiday ends up next to me, close enough that our arms brush every time she reaches for something. It’s almost too much.
My dad launches into a story about what a kid asked for Christmas.
“He said a billion dollars,” Dad says. “I remember the days when remote control cars were in.”
Hudson makes comments under his breath that have a very pregnant Emma shooting him warning looks. Jake and Claire are wrapped up in wedding plan conversations with my mom. Colby is drawing in a notebook while refusing to eat broccoli.
And I can’t stop glancing at Holiday as she listens to Mawmaw like every word matters. She’s adorable without even trying.
I’m so completely fucked.
“Lucas, honey, for the third time, could you please pass the potatoes?” my mom asks.
“Oh, sure,” I say, realizing I’m too distracted.
It’s just hard for me to believe any of this is real, after wishing for this for so long. I grab the bowl and pass it, catching Emma’s knowing gaze from across the table.
I know I’m going to get shit for this later.
“So, Holiday,” Mawmaw says, cutting into her pot roast. “How’s it feel to be back home?”
“Great, actually,” Holiday tells her with a sweet smile. “Strange sometimes, but I’m blessed and have a lot to be thankful for. Friends, family, a fun job. No complaints.”
“Fifteen years is a long time to be away from the people who love you.” Mawmaw’s eyes flick to me for just a second, and I try to ignore her. “You being here now is what matters most.”
“Yes, ma’am,” Holiday offers between small bites. “This is delicious. The roast is perfect.”
“Thanks, honey. Means a lot coming from someone like you. Makes this old woman very happy. Not to mention, you’re baking with my Lucas again.”
Holiday’s eyes soften, and it makes my chest flutter. “Yeah. We make a good team.”
“You always did.” Mawmaw takes a sip of wine. “Even when you were teenagers sneaking into my kitchen at midnight to bake and drink my nog.”
“No, we didn’t,” I say, but it’s impossible to hold back my grin.
“Oh, you think I didn’t notice my rum was half gone in the morning?” She laughs. “Plus, you were always so loud. I just pretended to be asleep because I knew you two were being safe and making good choices.”
Holiday chokes on her water. “Yes, we were safe in the kitchen.”
“That’s right.” She looks at Holiday with warm eyes. “I’m glad you’re back, sweetheart. Truly. This town hasn’t been the same without you. Neither has Lucas.”
“Mawmaw,” I warn.
My brothers and parents eat, watching us chat like it’s a tennis match.
“Don’t be shy about it,” Mawmaw tells me, reaching for my hand.
My mom clears her throat, but she just acts innocent. This is a part of the matchmaking games she likes to play.
“So, I’ve heard you’ve been helping Holiday prep,” Emma says. “Ready to quit the farm and come work at the bakery?”
“Hell no,” Lucas tells her.
Hudson laughs, knowing Emma’s just trying to rile me up.
Under the table, Holiday’s knee bumps against mine, and she doesn’t move away. I don’t know if it’s intentional or accidental, but I stay in place.
The wine flows, along with the conversation, and by the end of it, we’re laughing.
“Oh shit. I forgot the dessert in the truck. I’ll be right back,” I tell them.
As soon as I walk out of the dining room, Mawmaw says loudly, “Now that he’s gone, give us all the tea.”
I chuckle, not remembering the last time I felt this at ease. For once, it feels like things are clicking into place in my life. Holiday returning has always been on my wish list, but it was never expected. In my mind, she’d marry that man, start a family, and fade away from my life forever.
I don’t know why it feels like a second chance. But I also don’t know if I can let her in again. The heartache I experienced from losing her the first time nearly destroyed me. Not sure I’m strong enough to survive that hell again. It took years. And her being here is a reminder of that.
After dinner, we clear the table, and Mawmaw cuts into The One. The room goes silent as everyone chews, then swallows. It’s the only time I’ve heard all of them speechless at once.
“Holy shit,” Hudson finally says around a mouthful.
“Hudson!” Emma hisses, nodding at Colby.
“Holy shit, Dad!” Colby says, beaming.
“That’s a bad word,” Hudson tells his son, who repeats it again with a little giggle behind it.
Jake nods. “These are definitely better than last year’s winner.”
“Ugh! That was us,” Emma says. “But truthfully, these would’ve kicked our ass.”
Mom and Dad are just as delighted.
Holiday and I focus on Mawmaw. She sits with her eyes closed, chewing slowly.
Everyone waits.
Finally, she looks at me, then at Holiday.
“These will absolutely win,” she says, like she’s predicting it.
Holiday chuckles, like she’s relieved. “Really?”
“The shortbread is perfect. The fudge is balanced. The pecans add texture. And that salt. Chef’s kiss.” She takes another bite. “This is a winner. What did you name it?”
“Chef’s kiss would’ve been cute, but we chose The One, because you can’t just have one serving, and it’s the only cookie you’ll ever need during the holiday season.” She’s beaming with happiness. And fuck me, I want to kiss her right here in front of everyone.
What would happen if I pulled her onto my lap and tasted her sweet lips?
Instead, I stay seated and push that thought away. “Told you they were great.”
“You did,” she mutters.
“Now, don’t y’all get cocky,” Mawmaw says. “There are a lot of people competing. Last I heard, over thirty.”
“There could be fifty teams. I know this is gonna win. And before anyone says anything, I’m not cocky. I’m confident. There’s a difference. I know what we’ve got,” I say.
Mawmaw tilts her head.
“You two, just…wow,” Mom says. “Created a masterpiece.”
Emma mouths You’re fucked with a laugh.
I mouth Fuck you back to her.
This makes her laugh harder.
Once every last crumb of our cookie bar is eaten, Holiday and I help clean the kitchen since we’re the youngest in the family. By the time we’re done, it’s after eight. Everyone settles in for a movie, and Mawmaw plays games with Colby.
“We’re gonna head out,” I tell everyone.
“Already? Feels like you just got here,” Dad says.
“Hours have passed,” I say.
“Are you going home?” Mawmaw asks.
Every single person in the room goes silent. Hudson is grinning. Jake is trying not to laugh. Emma looks delighted.
“That’s no one’s business,” I say, glancing around the room.
“Bye, everyone,” Holiday says, offering a wave.
Mawmaw pulls both of us into hugs. “Go on, just behave yourselves.”
“Always,” I say. “Goodbye!”
I place my hand on the small of her back and lead her outside. The temperature has dropped, and Holiday wraps her arms around herself against the cold. I give her my jacket from the back seat, then start the engine. Her breath fogs in the air, and I crank the heat.
“This is ominous,” she says as I take the old dirt road that leads behind Mawmaw’s house.
“Just trust me,” I tell her, driving down the trail, deeper into the woods, at the far edge of our property.
“I do.”