Chapter 24
HOLIDAY
The ceremony tent empties as guests make their way to the cocktail area, while the crew transforms the main space for dinner and dancing.
I lose sight of Lucas in the crowd, which is probably for the best because if I find him right now, I might do something completely inappropriate in front of three hundred people.
White-gloved servers are already circulating through the cocktail tent with champagne flutes and silver trays of fancy appetizers.
The bar is doing a steady business with a line of guests waiting for signature cocktails.
The quartet has moved to this space and is playing soft jazz that mingles with conversation and laughter.
I grab a glass of champagne from a passing server and take a sip, barely tasting it.
“You okay?” Tricia appears at my side, and her eyes are full of knowing.
“I’m fine.”
“You look like you’re about to combust.” She links her arm through mine. “Come on. Let’s find somewhere you can breathe.”
She guides me toward a quieter corner where Mawmaw is standing with Hudson, Emma, and Colby. She looks teary-eyed.
“That was beautiful,” Mawmaw says when she sees me. “Wasn’t it beautiful?”
“It was perfect,” I agree, taking another sip of champagne.
“Jake did good.” Hudson grins. “Didn’t think he’d make it through his vows without completely losing it, but he held it together.”
Emma grins. “It was sweet. Very sweet. I’m so happy for my sister. I couldn’t stop crying.”
“You cry at commercials these days, babe. The pregnancy hormones have you all over the place,” Hudson offers, placing a kiss on her forehead.
“That’s true,” Emma agrees. “But those vows were moving.”
All eyes turn to me and my face heats. “They were touching.”
“Mm-hmm.” Emma studies me.
“And you were definitely not staring at Lucas the entire time. Not at all,” Hudson says.
“I will kick your ass, Jolly,” I warn.
“What? I’m just saying what everyone else is thinking,” he says. “You two were having your own moment up there. It was very obvious from where I was standing. Lucas looked like he was about to abandon his best man duties and go to you.”
I don’t know what to say to that, so I just take another sip of champagne.
Tricia moves me away from them. “You and Lucas?”
“No,” I say. “I mean, not yet. Maybe? I don’t know,” I whisper.
She gives me a knowing look. “Go for it. What do you have to lose?”
“Him.”
My sister takes a deep breath. “No way. I don’t believe that.”
The photographers are everywhere, capturing candid moments of people laughing, talking, and celebrating. Servers continue to circulate with drinks and food. The energy is festive and joyful and exactly what a wedding reception should feel like.
And then I see him.
Lucas is standing near one of the heat lamps with some of his old friends. His jacket is unbuttoned now and he looks relaxed as he laughs at something someone said. His head is thrown back, and that smile on his face makes my heart skip. He’s so beautiful it almost hurts to look at him.
He’s completely in his element, and it shows.
“You’re staring again,” Tricia says beside me.
“I can’t help it.” The words come out before I can stop them. “Look at him.”
“Oh, I’m looking.” Tricia sounds amused as she snags a glass of champagne from a server. “And he can’t seem to keep his eyes off you.”
I study my sister. “What?”
“He’s been watching you since you walked in here. He’s just better at being subtle than you are.” She squeezes my arm. “This is harder than you thought it would be, isn’t it?”
“What is?”
“Letting yourself have what you’ve always wanted.” She tilts her head toward Lucas. “He’s right there, and I can tell you want to go over there and climb him like a tree.”
“Tricia!” But I’m laughing because she’s not wrong.
“What? Am I lying?” She grins at me. “You heard those vows. You watched Jake and Claire promise forever to each other. And the whole time you were imagining Lucas saying those words to you.”
“I wasn’t—”
“Holiday, I know you better than you know yourself. Don’t lie to me.” She uses her big sister tone. “It’s okay to want him. It’s okay to be scared and want him anyway.”
“I’m trying to be realistic about this,” I confess.
“You’re trying to be safe.” She touches my arm. “But I know you came back to Merryville for him. You left Paris. You left Dominic. You came home. And we both know it wasn’t because you couldn’t find a job anywhere else.”
“Tri—”
“Stop overthinking everything.” Her voice is firm now. “That man has been in love with you since you were teenagers. And you’ve been in love with him just as long. Everyone knows it. I saw the articles. I’ve read every one. The whole town knows. So, what are you waiting for?”
“For him,” I say. “He’s being cautious with me. Wants to make sure that I’m sure.”
“Then be sure.” She smiles. “Let yourself want him. Let yourself have him. Tell him. Stop being so afraid of being happy.”
Before I can respond, someone calls Tricia’s name from across the tent. She excuses herself with a knowing look, leaving me standing there with my champagne and my racing thoughts.
Mawmaw walks over. “She’s right, you know.”
“Mawmaw, please—”
“My Lucas has been in love with you your entire life. And you’ve been in love with him just as long.” She touches my hair the way she used to when I was little. “I know you’re scared, sweetheart. I know Dominic hurt you and made you doubt yourself. But Lucas isn’t Dominic.”
“I know that.”
“Do you?” Her green eyes search mine. “Because it seems like you’re punishing yourself for Dominic’s mistakes. And that’s not fair to either of you.”
The words hit harder than I expect. “I’m not.”
“What’s stopping you?” she asks.
“I don’t know,” I whisper.
“Yes, you do.” She squeezes my hand and then pulls me into a hug. “Stop being afraid, sweetheart. Stop letting your past dictate your future. Lucas would move heaven and earth for you. Let him.”
She pulls back and wipes at my eyes before my tears can fall. Then she drifts away to talk to some other guests, leaving me alone with my thoughts.
I take another sip of champagne and let myself look at Lucas again. Our eyes meet across the tent, and the heat in his gaze makes my mouth go dry.
He doesn’t look away, and neither do I.
The moment stretches between us, loaded with everything we haven’t said. Everything we’ve been holding back. Then someone says something to him and he’s forced to turn away.
The spell breaks.
I drain the rest of my champagne and grab another glass from a passing server. The music continues, and time moves forward the way it always does at events like this. I make small talk with people from my past and several ask me about the baking contest in two weeks.
And then I see her.
Lindsay Moore walks through the entrance in a green dress that shows off her figure perfectly. Her blond hair is styled in loose waves that look effortless but probably took an hour. She’s beautiful and confident and walking straight toward Lucas.
My stomach drops so fast, I feel lightheaded. Knowing that he dated her makes jealousy rage inside of me.
Lindsay was one of my friends in high school. We were on student council together. We went to the same parties. We studied together sometimes. And then, years later, after I left for Paris, she dated Lucas.
I watch as she approaches him where he’s standing with his friends. I watch his expression change from relaxed to polite. She says something that makes him smile in that friendly way he has when he’s being courteous but not particularly interested.
When she touches his arm, something hot and ugly twists inside me.
I’ve never experienced jealousy like this. It makes me want to cross the room and physically remove her hand from him.
“They dated,” Sammy says beside me, sipping from his flask. He appeared next to me without me even noticing. “For about a year.”
“Yeah,” I manage to say through gritted teeth. “I know.”
“He considered marrying her,” Sammy says.
I turn to him. “Why are you telling me this?”
“Because I want you to know what you almost lost,” he tells me.
Lindsay leans closer to Lucas and says something. He laughs at whatever it is. She touches his arm again, more deliberately this time, letting her hand linger on his bicep.
My champagne glass is in serious danger of shattering in my grip.
They continue chatting and Lucas glances toward the reception tent where music has started to play. The dinner space must be ready because couples are starting to drift in that direction.
No. Please, no.
Lindsay is asking him to dance and Lucas is agreeing. He said yes to her.
I watch them walk toward the reception tent together. Lindsay’s hand is still on his arm, possessive and familiar. They’re both smiling and talking and I might be sick. Or commit murder. It’s hard to tell at this point.
“You gonna let that happen?” Sammy asks.
I can’t respond. I can’t move. I can’t do anything except watch Lucas disappear into the reception tent with my old friend, who also happens to be his ex-girlfriend. Lucas dated her after I left. She touched him and kissed him and was with him while I was in Paris pretending I was happy.
“March over there right now,” Sammy says. “You’re both being stubborn idiots.”
He grins at me, and I recognize that look. It’s his scheming face. “Okay then, give him a taste of his own medicine.”
“What does that mean? Are you drunk?” I ask him, knowing he’d never ever support this.
He scans the cocktail area with purpose. “We need to find you someone to dance with. Someone Lucas will definitely notice and absolutely hate seeing you with.”
“I don’t think this is a good idea,” I tell my brother.
“Trust me on this.” He points across the room decisively. “There. Jake’s friend. The tall one in the navy suit. What’s his name? Derek? David? Dylan! That’s his name.”
I recognize him from earlier when I was moving into the seating area.