Chapter 5
CHAPTER FIVE
Starblade didn’t like the ugly, twisting sensation inside him while he watched another man trying to seduce Vardox. A part of him worried that perhaps he had rejected Vardox too many times in the past and he might be tempted to take his heart and his tentacles elsewhere.
As if sensing Starblade’s unease, Vardox pulled his chair close enough that Starblade was nearly falling into his lap.
“Stop frowning, darling. That Tranathian never had a chance with me, especially after being so abominably rude to you.” Vardox grinned. “He was quite wrong you know. You’re far more handsome than him.”
Some of the tension in Starblade’s body eased. “Ahem. Yes, well. Don’t let it happen again. If someone else tries to woo you, tell them to get lost.”
Vardox leaned closer, the tip of his forked tongue flicking against the shell of Starblade’s ear and making him shiver. “Now why would I do that, my dear captain, when watching you take care of them for me is so much more fun?”
Starblade looked daggers at him. “Don’t push it. My blood’s still boiling.”
Vardox licked his lips. “Tell me more.”
“You’re just trying to rile me up. Quit it.”
Vardox fluttered innocent eyes at him. “I would never, darling.” He ran a clawed finger along Starblade’s collar. “But I do have some ideas about how we could work off some of that hot-blooded energy of yours.”
Starblade gulped and his traitorous cock started to harden in his pants.
Vardox gave him a knowing look and stood. “I suggest we continue this scintillating conversation in private—and preferably naked.”
—The Tentacular Tales of Captain Starblade, Ch. 170
Kai
The next morning is technically Christmas back on Earth but, knowing we’d be gone during the actual holiday, River and I already did our celebration early with his family and mine.
So after we sleep in and have a leisurely breakfast, we put on our swimming attire and head toward the public area of the lagoon.
“I want to people watch!” River tells me excitedly. “Just think of what kinds of inspiration I might get for my story. Vardox and Starblade need some new adventures now that they’ve shared their true feelings.”
Although I would much prefer to stay by ourselves in our private, closed-off end of the lagoon, I can’t say no to River, especially when he’s being so cute. His enthusiasm is infectious, and I find myself smiling the whole way as he drags me toward the lagoon deck.
The place is busy but not so crowded as to make me antsy to leave, and we easily find two free loungers with shade umbrellas next to one another.
River flops down on his. “Ah, this is the life.” He studies the other guests with a keen eye, then winks at me. “Don’t worry, babe. I’m already making mental notes.”
A server from the open wet bar off to one side of the lagoon comes over to us, offering us each a free cocktail since we’re resort guests. River takes his eagerly, eyes sparkling as he inspects the fruity slushy concoction in a swirl of rainbow colors.
He takes a sip and grins at the server. “This is right up my alley, my good friend, please keep them coming.”
The server gives him a gracious bow and disappears as suddenly as they appeared.
I savor my cocktail more slowly than River. Despite its fruity flavor and deceptively nonthreatening appearance, it’s quite strong. River, however, decides to fully indulge in the experience, and after his third cocktail, he’s charmingly tipsy.
“I don’t know what they put in this intergalactic cocktail,” he says, laboring over his words, “but I’m feeling suuuuper fine.” He gives me a double thumbs-up that’s both dorky and sweet.
“I think you should stick to water from here on out, my love,” I tell him gently.
He hiccups and blinks at me a few times before flashing a blinding grin. “You’re so smart, boo. I fucking loooove you.”
Dear galactic gods.
“I love you too. In fact, why don’t I help you? I’ll go and grab you some water to start sobering you up.”
“Ooh, I’m getting the royal treatment, huh? I like it,” he says, playfully smacking me on my ass as I walk away.
There’s a line at the bar, so it takes me some time before I reach the front to order. As I’m carrying our waters back, I turn my attention in River’s direction and frown.
Someone I don’t know is perched on the end of River’s lounger, chatting him up with obvious interest.
“Not on my bloody watch,” I growl to myself.
I lengthen my stride and hurry back to River, setting down our drinks loudly enough to startle our unwelcome interloper.
“You’re back! I missed you,” River says, smiling up at me. Then he waves a floppy hand at our unwanted guest. “This is… I can’t remember. But his name sounds a lot like Anus.” He dissolves into giggles.
“I’m Saturnus,” the tool offers with clear amusement.
“That’s right. He’s also staying at the resort,” River slurs, listing to the side as he talks.
I hand him a glass of water, and he takes several deep gulps while I turn a steely-eyed look at Saturnus. He’s shorter than me, but wider and more muscular. I don’t like him one bit.
He shoots me a smarmy grin that raises my hackles.
“River tells me you two are here on your honeymoon. I happen to be here alone, and I’m entirely free and available if you’d like a third to join in on the fun.”
I cross my arms and glare at him. “No, thank you. Ours is not an open relationship.”
River reaches over a hand and awkwardly pats my thigh while I stand beside him in a protective stance.
“That’s right, hubby-boo, just me and you.” He starts giggling again. “Tee-hee. That rhymed.”
Through all this, Saturnus can’t hide his obvious interest, and just like that, I’ve had enough.
“It’s time for you to leave,” I tell him. “We’re not interested.”
He opens his mouth to protest, but I let out a tentacle that thrashes the air in warning. He jumps to his feet and hurries off.
I huff in satisfaction.
River stares at me with hearts in his eyes. “I didn’t know you could be so growly and intimidating. How downright alpha of you.” He fans himself. “Coming from you, that was super fucking hot. You can scare off skeevy guys for me any day.”
I’m pleased with his words but still quietly fuming inside. How dare anyone try to hit on my husband? I don’t care how attractive River is, he’s taken and I. Don’t. Share.
River’s eyes widen. “Ohmyfreakinggod! Don’t get mad, but this whole incident has given me a great idea for Vardox and Starblade.”
I sit on the edge of his lounger, eager to find out more. “Do tell.”
“Okay. So thus far, Vardox is always the one chasing off anyone trying to woo Starblade and being all jealous and stuff. But the shoe’s never been on the other foot!”
“Oh?”
“Meaning, Starblade’s never had a taste of what that’s like when it comes to Vardox. But now that they’ve admitted their feelings, what if someone shows up who’s trying to steal Vardox from Starblade?”
I instantly perk up. “That would be a refreshing new direction.”
“And long overdue, amirite?”
“Indeed.”
River throws his arms around my neck and gives me a lip-smacking kiss. “This next chapter will be epic!”
I spend the next hour forcing River to drink several glasses of water, and by the end of it, he’s far more clear-headed and more than a little embarrassed.
“I should have known after my experience with Nirblob’s ship moonshine that alien liquor hits harder than the human variety.”
“Agreed. Let’s steer clear of the cocktails for now.”
He nods, then gets up and stretches like a cat in the sun. His smaller and more compact body is on tantalizing display in his swimming briefs, which gives me all kinds of inappropriate thoughts here in public.
Oblivious to his own silent seduction, River says, “Let’s test out the waters of this lagoon. There’s no way I’m missing out on this.”
We make our way over to the steps that descend into the bioluminescent water and follow them down. The cool water envelops us, and River runs the water through his hands with delight.
“So freaking cool.” Then he hesitates and stares at me like a deer in the headlights. “This isn’t going to make my skin glow—not like the mud bath, but for real—after I get out of here, is it?”
I throw my head back and laugh. “Never fear, the bioluminescent properties of the water are not transferable to one’s skin. I promise.”
“Phew. That could be cool but also really awkward. I don’t care to glow in the dark like I’ve been irradiated,” he says with a goofy grin.
Time passes pleasantly while we alternate between swimming lazy laps and floating in the water as the sun beats down on us.
I’m not usually one to be idle, but with River, it doesn’t seem to chafe as much.
To be perfectly frank, I think I actually need to stop working for the first time in my life and just enjoy this precious time with River.
My mom would be so proud.
In the late afternoon, we pull ourselves out of the lagoon, grab our towels, and head back to our private honeymoon suite, where we enjoy a mutually enjoyable shower together. After toweling off, River starts rifling excitedly through his clothes hanging in the closet.
“Decisions, decisions,” he murmurs to himself.
I sit on the bed and watch him. I have a feeling I know where this is going. “What do you mean?”
He whirls around and beams at me, eyes sparkling. “Oh, did I forget to tell you? Tonight is the opening ceremony for Tentacular Tales Con.”
I fight back a laugh and growl playfully, “No, you did not.”
He didn’t have to. I already knew and had fully expected River would want to make an appearance there.
I arch an eyebrow at him. “I think the more important question is, are you going incognito or out in the open? The choice is yours.”
River taps his lips as he thinks about it. Then he sighs. “Incognito would probably be best,” he admits.
I get up and saunter over, pulling him into my arms. “Agreed. We don’t want you to be mobbed by your adoring fans. It would take away from our time together.”
“That’s what I’m thinking too. I’ll wait until closer to the end of the festivities to reveal myself in all my glory,” he proclaims, puffing out his chest.
I can’t hold back a laugh. “That sounds perfectly acceptable. After all, we wouldn’t want your fans to find out you’d been here all along and they never got the chance to meet you.
” I lean down and whisper in his ear, making him shiver the way I knew it would.
“In fact, I’ve already coordinated it with the organizers for you to have a surprise signing event on the second to last day. ”
River gasps, hearts in his eyes as he studies me. “You did that for me, boo? Really?”
My hearts swell in my chest. There’s very little I wouldn’t do for this man.
“Of course, but with the organizers’ agreement that I will be your personal security at the event, making sure none of your fans get too out of hand or want to give you any, ahem, inappropriate gifts.”
River grins. “Some of them are pretty saucy, aren’t they?”
“That’s putting it mildly, dear.”
River claps his hands together. “This is going to be so much fun. I can’t wait.” He steps back and does a little twirl. “But for tonight, my sexy hubby-boo, we’re going to be super suave undercover agents infiltrating the Tentacular Tales Con. I even brought the perfect outfits for us!”
Of course he did.
“Please tell me it’s not another onesie,” I say with a wince.
He waves an admonishing finger at me. “No dissing the magic of the onesie. However, you’re off the hook this time. This is a fan convention, after all. I went full-on nerd with some of the ensembles I prepared for us.”
“Why does that make me even more worried?” I ask dryly.
“Don’t fight it, boo. You’ll never beat the force of my sci-fi nerd superpowers. Best to just give in.”
Galactic gods help me, but I do.