Chapter 10
Chapter Ten
After endless preparations, the wedding day was finally right around the corner.
On the night before the big day, Evan shared a drink with Carlson.
Lilly had woken up from her nightly nightmare and had fallen back to sleep, so now all that remained before the wedding was a quiet night that would drive Evan mad without a spot of company and some brandy.
Over the years, the line between butler and friend had blurred, which Evan appreciated. His butler was one of the few people he fully trusted, and he was glad to call him a friend.
Carlson had been butler at Pemberton Manor longer than Evan had been duke. He took the position when Evan had been only a teenager who was more interested in sneaking books out of his father’s library than spending time with his schoolmates.
His father had been very protective of his private collection of books and wouldn’t let Evan borrow more than one at a time. That wasn’t enough for Evan, so he kept a dozen or so stolen books hidden under his bed.
Carlson had been in charge of finding the thief who kept pilfering the late duke’s favorite books. When he found out it was Evan, he had been amused instead of cross. He told Evan that he wouldn’t tell his father it was him as long as the books were returned to their rightful place on the shelf.
After Evan had returned the books, the butler gave him a list of his own favorite books. “These titles might interest you,” he said. “I own several of them myself and would be happy to lend them to you. I will help you obtain the others without robbing His Grace of his own book collection.”
Since then, Evan trusted the butler and felt more comfortable with him than almost anyone else. Despite their difference in station, Carlson was always willing to be honest with Evan, even when he disagreed with him, and Evan found that refreshing. Carlson became his confidante and then his friend.
The older man sat with him as Evan drank his brandy. He regarded the duke carefully. “So, tomorrow you will be a married man again, Your Grace.”
Evan nodded. “It should not take too long. I do not see how marriage will greatly affect my life, but at least a new mother will be able to provide Lilly with some stability and comfort. Perhaps Marina’s presence will help keep her nightmares at bay.”
“You had best proceed with caution,” Carlson said. “A lot of children would not take kindly to someone new in their lives, trying to replace a lost parent.”
“Lilly will understand,” Evan said confidently. “In fact, this will be good for her. She keeps asking for a mother, but she knows that Christine is dead. Marina can fill that void quickly enough.”
Carlson seemed to disagree. “Did I ever tell you, Your Grace, that when I was a young lad, I thought that the peerage held titles and wealth because they were so much smarter than the rest of us common folk? Again and again, you dispel me of that notion.”
“You think I am being an idiot.”
The butler’s eyes glinted with mischief. “What gave you that impression, Your Grace?”
Evan managed to keep his smile off his face as he sipped his brandy. “I always appreciate your candor, Carlson. But I know I am doing the right thing by marrying her.”
He nodded. “To be honest, Your Grace, I think you are as well. Lilly needs a mother.” He raised his eyebrows at his employer. “And you need a wife.”
Evan shrugged. “I had a wife before, and it did not bring me much happiness.”
“Not every marriage ends up like your last. I barely know Miss Shirley, but she does not seem like one prone to infidelity.”
Evan grimaced as he remembered Christine and her long-term lover, Mr. Barrowman. She started seeing him shortly after they were married. He had worked hard to keep the ton from knowing about it.
The last thing I want is for anyone to doubt Lilly’s parentage.
He realized his hand was shaking slightly as he thought about what could happen if they found out that the late duchess had been having an affair.
Barrowman resembled him closely enough for people to wonder if Lilly was really the daughter of a silk merchant instead of the daughter of a duke.
She could easily be ruined if people found out.
Not to mention, Barrowman could worm his way back into my life if he so chose.
Carlson was watching him with a sharp look, as if he understood everything that Evan was thinking about.
Perhaps he did. His butler knew him better than anyone.
“You paid him off, remember? He was never that interested in Lilly anyway, and he is currently making a name for himself in France. He would not be stupid enough to come back and try to claim her.”
“You are right,” Evan said. “But I still cannot help but worry. This business with ‘Mr. E’ has put me on edge.”
“I know. But there is no stranger on the grounds. I have personally checked. I think Mr. E is simply a figment of your daughter’s imagination. Children are prone to such fancies.”
Evan shook his head. “Why would a child imagine a friend? It is irrational.”
“Because she is a child,” Carlson said dryly. “They are not known for rationality.” He glanced at the clock and stood up. “You should get to bed if you want to be in a fit state in the morning.”
Evan grimaced as he looked at the time. “It is already morning, Carlson. And I am getting married in a few hours. I do not know if I will truly be in a fit state for it.” Christine was always quick to tell me just how unfit for marriage I truly am.
The butler smiled wryly. “I suggest you at least try, Your Grace.”
Even though Evan went to bed as Carlson recommended, he was not able to get to sleep.
He could not help thinking about his future wife.
The beautiful woman intrigued him to no end.
There was something so fascinating about her.
He wondered if it would have been less complicated to go through the tedious courting process to find a more forgettable wife.
No, I did the right thing. I am a man of honor, and I indirectly caused her ruin. It would have been unfair of me not to offer my hand in marriage.
Finally, the sun rose on the horizon, and Evan gave up any pretense of sleeping. He stood as his valet came into his room to help him dress in his wedding clothes. He looked at himself in the mirror numbly as he remembered his first wedding all too well.
It had also been a marriage of convenience. Christine was eager to become a duchess at first, even though she did not seem to care about him at all. That was fine, or so he thought.
The only reason my first marriage was not a huge mistake was that it gave me Lilly. I do not care whose blood she has in her veins: she’s my daughter, and I’m glad of it. I can only hope that my second one will be more successful for everyone’s sake.
When he was dressed, he walked down the hallway to Lilly’s bed chamber. He can hear her speaking on the other side of the door. “… always sleepy in the morning. My nanny says it is because I keep waking up at night. But it is not my fault.”
Evan frowned and opened the door. “Who are you talking to, Lilly?”
There was no one else in the room, except for Prince William, who was lying down on Lilly’s bed, still fast asleep. Lilly froze and looked at him with a wide-eyed expression.
“Who are you talking to?” he repeated, looking around the room, as if expecting to find an answer to his question. But of course, there were no other humans in the room.
His daughter did not reply. Instead, she continued to stare at him as if she were frozen. Concern and irritation warred within him. He took a deep breath, willing his neutral facade to stay in place. Do not show your emotions to her. Be a picture of strength. She already has nightmares as it is.
“Today is a special day, Lilly,” he told her. “Do you know why?”
She shook her head silently.
“It is because I am getting married. Do you know what that means?”
Again, she shook her head. Evan wondered if she had been neglecting her lessons.
Surely, she should be more knowledgeable about the ways of the world by now?
He tried to smile, but he was pretty sure it came out looking more like a pained grimace.
“Me getting married means you will have a new mother. You will officially meet her today. I am sure the two of you will get along.”
“A new mother?” Her voice was small and doubtful.
“Yes,” he said. “You have been calling out for a mother in the middle of the night, remember? Now you will have one.”
She blinked rapidly and looked down at her lap. “All right,” she whispered.
He felt his disappointment growing. Shouldn’t she be delighted at this news?
She wanted a mother, and he had gotten her one.
Her old mother abandoned her. She cannot want Christine in particular.
Just someone to fill the role of mother.
“Do you have any objections? Thoughts on the matter? Anything at all?”
She shook her head.
He sighed. “It is perfectly acceptable for you to speak more than a few words at a time, you know. In fact, I would prefer it.” Just talk to me. I cannot help you if you do not.
His daughter did not respond, and eventually he sighed in resignation. Just as he was about to turn to leave, the nursery door opened, and the nanny entered, carrying Lilly’s dress.
Anger flared up at the sight of her. “Where were you?”
The woman bobbed a curtsy as she held up the dress to him. “I was getting Lilly’s dress, Your Grace.”
“You should have sent a maid to get it,” he said. “I do not appreciate Lilly being left alone. She is too young for that.”
The woman looked surprised, and then a little disgruntled about the scolding. She lowered her eyes. “My apologies, Your Grace,” she said stiffly.
He knew he was being a little unfair to her, but he could not care at the moment. “Make sure you do not let her out of your sight during the wedding.”
She nodded. “I would not dream of it, Your Grace.”
“Good. Because I will not be happy if something happens to her. Good morning.” He stepped around the nanny without another word to her and left his daughter’s nursery.