Chapter 15
Chapter Fifteen
“Are you looking forward to this evening?” Caspian asked his wife over breakfast.
“I am,” she responded simply, not bothering to look up at him; it was as if the food on her plate held such interest that to look away would be unthinkable.
“As am I,” Caspian told her, expecting this to elicit a reaction out of her. Anything from a smile to soft laughter might have been nice, proof to Caspian that she appreciated his excitement.
“I am glad,” was her withdrawn response.
Caspian found himself eyeing his wife with extreme concern… or perhaps it was frustration… or maybe it was annoyance? Likely, it was all the above, blended into a stew of confusion because Thalia was acting strangely and Caspian could not fathom why that might be.
I expected her to be buzzing this morning. I thought to have found her lazing about with a smile on her face and laughter in her voice. After last evening, and was I the type to do so, I might very well be the same.
Alas, his wife was behaving strangely in Caspian’s eyes. Ironically, she was behaving as he would usually be doing. No emotion. No regard for others in the room. An island without land in sight.
“What are your plans today?” he asked her, feeling the need to keep the conversation flowing, because the silence existing in the room was deafening and even uncomfortable.
“Nothing exciting,” she said without flourish as she cut into the toast on her plate and took a small bite.
“I thought you might wish to visit London,” he attempted. “Perhaps buy some jewelry to wear to tonight’s Ball?”
“There is no need,” she said, still not looking at him. “What I have will suffice.”
Caspian clicked his tongue as he felt his anger start to brew deep inside his gut.
He should not have cared how cold his wife was acting this morning.
He should not have given a damn whether she wished to talk to him or not.
Dammit, that he was even forced to pretend that he looked forward to the Ball this evening was beyond what Caspian thought himself capable.
And the fact she could not see how hard he was trying…
Is this not what she wants? For me to try harder, to pretend that I care, and to put effort into our marriage. I thought that was the entire point of all this!
He narrowed his eyes at Thalia, and if he was a different type of person, he might have snapped or demanded that she tell him what was going on. But Caspian was not that type of person, so he did what he always did in these situations: nothing.
Caspian did not care. He did not wish to waste time pretending otherwise. And he certainly was not about to pander to his wife to placate her feelings when as far as he was aware, she should have been on top of the world.
“Good,” he said stiffly, tearing his eyes from Thalia and going back to his breakfast. “We shall leave shortly after sunset. I expect you to be ready.”
“I will be,” she responded apathetically.
Things were not supposed to be this way. After last evening, even Caspian was looking forward to what he had presumed to be changes occurring between himself and his wife. Changes that, as far as he had been able to tell, were for the best.
It had started two weeks prior, the sense that he and Thalia were becoming more comfortable around one another.
She no longer vexed him purposefully. She no longer pushed and teased him, as if searching for a reaction.
She seemed to accept who he was, and rather than changing him, leaned into his personality.
This saw them grow closer. This saw Caspian want to spend more time with her. He knew where their marriage was heading and thus saw no reason to try and avoid her. If anything, he might have even gone so far as to say that he was starting to enjoy the time they spent together.
And then came last evening…
I still do not know what came over me. I was like an animal, unable to control myself, totally lost in the thrill of the moment, and always wanting more.
Thalia brought out a side of him that Caspian did not know existed until he was living it. Even now, hours after the fact, he could feel her body against his own, he could taste her lips on his tongue, and he could hear the sounds that escaped her lips when he pleasured her.
It made his blood run hot and his body start to tingle. It made him glance up from his plate of food, cheeks flushed red when he looked upon his wife, unable to keep his thoughts from straying to the obvious place… those they had visited the previous evening together.
He wanted her, and he was well past denying the fact by now. And until she was with child, Caspian saw no reason why they would not sleep together again and again and again. Better still, he was all but convinced she would be of the same mind.
At least he had been, until this morning.
Nothing else was said between them as they broke their fast, and when Thalia finished eating, she did not bother asking to be excused or saying goodbye. She simply stood and walked away.
“I will see you this evening…” Caspian said to himself with a deep sigh.
He should not have cared how his wife felt. He should not have given a damn if she was upset or angry or annoyed with him. But he did care, and that was a fact from which he could not escape.
The rest of the day was spent in confusion.
On principal, Caspian considered more than once that he would cancel their plans to attend the Ball together. If she did not wish to speak or be around him, so be it. It was not as if he wanted to go to the Ball either. It was not as if it was something he was champing at the bit for!
But if he did cancel, then it would be obvious to Thalia that she was getting to him – that he cared. And that, he could not allow.
Besides, as he had made clear to her already, they were attending these events not because they wished for it, but because they had no choice. Their marriage was not yet a secure thing, and to placate rumors and curb gossip, they needed to be seen. What was more, they needed to appear happy.
So it was that when evening came, Caspian readied himself as if nothing was the matter. They would get through tonight, they would do so without incident, and after it was all said and done, he was certain that whatever it was that had gotten into his wife would be well in the past.
It better be because if she thinks that acting as she has been will have any effect on me whatsoever, she is sorely mistaken!
“Thalia!” Caspian called from the foyer when the time arrived for them to leave. “Thalia!” He stood at the base of the steps, expecting her to appear at their top. “Thalia! Time is passing!”
Caspian took a calming breath, not wishing to be forced to go after her. Again, that would make it seem as if he cared, and he was not about to give her that win.
He took a step back and breathed deeply. Was it worth asking what was wrong? Just to placate her and make this evening bearable? No… do not give her that win. Whatever this is, it is on her, and I will not be bullied.
“Thalia!” he called, an edge to his voice. “Thalia, where are –”
“Are we leaving or not?” the voice came from behind Caspian.
He spun about to find his wife standing in the doorway. She was dressed in an emerald gown with golden hems, her jewelry were purple gemstones, and her hair was worn in tight ringlets. She looked beautiful, and Caspian was not afraid to think it.
He was afraid to say it, however. Or rather, he refused to say it, because that felt like groveling. They had not spoken once about the previous evening, and he wasn’t about to lead the conversation by fawning over her beauty.
“What are you doing?” he asked sharply.
“I am waiting for you,” she said. “You said we were set to leave just after sunset, no?”
Caspian looked from her to the top of the stairs and then passed her to where the carriage sat waiting in the driveaway. By the looks of things, she had readied herself early and sneaked outside, likely so that she could beat him.
“We are.” Caspian straightened. “Let us not waste time.”
He walked right by her and made for the carriage. If she wished to be this way, that was perfectly fine with him. After all, was this not how he had wanted this marriage to be in the first place?
They rode to Montague Estate in silence.
Thalia sat looking out the window, purposefully avoiding Caspian’s gaze. And Caspian tried to do the same, but was constantly pulled back into the carriage, unable to avoid sneaking peaks at his wife.
That she was so breathtaking certainly was not helping.
The white of her skin glowed in the moonlight, and her curves were pronounced in her dress in a way that had him thinking about last evening.
What they had done… it was for a purpose, to produce a child only, and not something that was meant to be enjoyed.
But Caspian enjoyed it. Dammit, he worshipped it. Bedding his wife had brought out another side of himself, and while he was hesitant to explore that side further, if it meant spending another evening in bed with his wife, so be it.
To do that, he would need to find out what was wrong with Thalia, but Caspian, ever the stubborn sort, wasn’t about to give her the pleasure. They would sleep together again—they had to; that was the purpose of this marriage—but he would not beg.
“Here we are,” Caspian said as the carriage came to a stop. “Allow me to –” He stood to open the door, his intent to climb out and help Thalia down.
“I am fine,” she said, quick to stand, quicker to open the door, and even quicker than that to exit the carriage.
Typically, the Montague Ball proceeded in much the same fashion.
Thalia was not rude to Caspian throughout. Nor did she ignore him or give any indication to the other attendees that anything was wrong. For most, at least those who did not know her, they would not have noticed anything strange about how she was behaving. The perfect wife, many would surely agree.
Caspian knew her well enough now to know differently.