Chapter Eight
When I brought Julian his breakfast the next morning, he’d left his door open.
I stepped into the doorway cautiously and saw him writing at his desk, dressed as impeccably as always.
Feeling like a rumpled mess in contrast, I lingered for a moment, studying the curiosity that he was.
With his brow furrowed in concentration and his hand scribbling furiously, he looked like a schoolboy.
“How early do you rise?” I abruptly asked, imagining that it must be well before dawn.
He startled, dropping his palm over the writing as if hiding a love note. “Excuse me?”
“You always look … so put together. No matter how early it is.”
For a moment, his mouth worked silently. I could recognize a lie in the making and couldn’t blame him. It had been improper of me to ask such a personal question. So it surprised me when he answered, “I don’t sleep particularly well. It’s easier to start my day early than try to achieve more rest.”
“These days have been tiring,” I admitted, offering a truth for a truth. “I’ve found myself falling asleep quickly.”
Julian watched me blankly. He’d been notorious for his intelligence at the House of Industry, but I was beginning to doubt that had resulted in any kind of camaraderie with his classmates.
“What are you working on?” I asked, genuinely surprised that anyone could be more awkward than I was.
“Documentation,” he said, his fingers tracing the edge of the paper as if he needed to protect it from me.
“That’s good. Alice, the forewoman, said we ought to document things in case we die.” It was meant to be a joke, but the words fell flat, and Julian stared at me as if I’d grown another set of hands.
With a sigh, I left his breakfast on the table beside his desk.
Unable to control a quick glance at his work, I saw the name Nikola at the top of the letter.
His handwriting was compact and without flourish, but there was something affectionate about the way he’d written the name.
“You look as if you’re composing a letter to a suitor,” I said with a smile.
Spending the afternoon with Ainsley had clearly cracked something open inside me—made me overly familiar.
Made me eager to hear the voice of another. To be heard.
It made me long for those I’d spent almost every day of my life with until now.
“Pardon?” Julian asked, wide-eyed, clearly startled by my stunning lack of matters.
I was behaving shamelessly. My face flushed. “Forgive me, Senior. It’s so early. My mind is half asleep.”
“Surely you’re aware that a Child of Industry would not have a suitor,” he said through gritted teeth. “Or are you even more woefully uneducated than you seem?”
I could not help thinking about Ezra. About the fact that I was going to meet him this very morning. He wasn’t a suitor, of course. But he was also most certainly not the kind of company Julian or the House would approve of me keeping.
“I ought not to have teased you,” I admitted, abruptly irritated. His eyes widened even more as I went on. “It’s only that I was used to a bit of friendly jesting with the others at the House. It made the day go by faster. It made us all …”
Not as desperately lonely.
“Then I suggest you better acclimate yourself to life in Frostbrook,” Julian said tightly, dismissing me with a wave of his hand.
“Yes, Senior,” I managed to reply without the irritation I felt.
Resisting the urge to snatch the letter up and read it the way I’d often stolen Tabitha’s diary, I left him alone in his quiet room.
A ways down the corridor, I halted with my back against the wall and breathed through a heady mix of anger and amusement.
Oh, Gertrude would have loved to know how much I’d utterly failed to control my tongue.
I missed her so much.
With my chores scheduled for later in the afternoon, I busied myself tidying my quarters to keep from showing up at the river too early.
Ezra was already at the dock when I arrived.
He had his back to me when I approached, and a wave of familiarity struck me at the shape of his broad shoulders and the way he wore his hair unfashionably long.
“Don’t let me startle you!” I called out.
He turned and arched a thick brow at me. “I’m not as easily startled as you, Apprentice. At the very least, I haven’t hurled myself off any river-banks lately.”
Twitching, I patted the bag at my hip. “I have bread and butter.” It was a peace offering, though I wasn’t sure why I felt like I needed to ease the space between us.
“Thank you. I missed supper last night.” Exhaustion lined his face, but there was something day bright about him, as if a fire burned behind his eyes.
“Beatrice attended a birth, and it lasted all night. A boy, born right before dawn. They’re calling him Tiernan!
” He accepted the offered bread and bit into it like a starved man.
“Wait for the butter,” I said through laughter, opening the waxed-paper package and spreading the substance onto his rough piece.
“Thank you,” he repeated with his mouth full.
“What part did you play in the birth?” I asked, having only a rudimentary familiarity with the whole affair. Human reproduction had not been a topic of study at the House.
“Support, mostly. Heating water, making sure Beatrice had her tools and that the mother’s family was kept aware of her progress. The father—he’s working on the Mission construction—stayed by her side the whole time.”
“A father attending a birth?” I asked, surprised. It was my understanding that in Sterling City, women were kept secluded with their midwives, sisters, and mothers.
“He had a part in it, didn’t he?”
I’d never thought of it that way and blushed terribly. I shoved bread into my mouth and savored the nutty flavor, hoping it would distract me from inadvertently talking about sex with Ezra. As with birthing, I knew only what the other students had whispered of. All of it sounded messy.
“You eat like you’ve never had good bread,” Ezra observed.
That did nothing for my blush. “I haven’t. Not like this. It tastes like the countryside. Sunny.”
“What did the bread taste like where you come from?”
“A little dusty. Sometimes the smell of the port carried all the way to the House of Industry, and no matter how much incense we burned, everything tasted like rotting fish and horse shit.”
He snorted. “That’s specific.”
“Specifically terrible.”
Ezra grabbed my hand. “Let’s go.”
His fingers were warm, and his hand was much bigger than mine. It took all I had not to trip over my own feet at the shock of heat that ran through me. I resolved to make nothing of it. It was simply that I rarely touched others.
Leading me away from the dock and onto the path we’d traveled before, he glanced down at my feet. “Good-looking trousers. Ainsley works fast.”
“Why did you lie to me?” I asked, pulling my hand from his. I wasn’t angry, not really. But I needed to know. And when I had a question, my headstrong mind didn’t wait for the proper moment.
He stiffened, absently brushing his hands against his shirt. “What do you mean?”
“You said the town had no tailor.”
“Ah.” Ezra shuffled his feet, looking down sheepishly. “She can be particular about strangers. I didn’t think she’d want me sending you her way.”
“The shopkeeper had no qualms about sending me to her.”
“I’m not surprised. She doesn’t know Ainsley like I do.”
“Ainsley had no qualms either,” I pointed out, feeling a twinge of discomfort at the notion of Ainsley and Ezra knowing each other well.
Ezra lifted his hands as if in surrender. The corner of his mouth twitched. “I misjudged the situation. Will you forgive me, Apprentice Haven?”
Shaking my head, I couldn’t help laughing at his mock formality. “I’ll make an attempt.”
“Anyway. Like I said, she did a fine job with the alterations.” His gaze traveled down the length of my legs before he looked away quickly. “No chores today?”
It took me a moment to find my voice. “Julian wants me to help him supervise a shipment of radiance cable coming in on the train late in the day. So I’ve got a little time to dally.”
Ezra led me along the path once more. “Why do you need to supervise? Surely they’ve had plenty of practice unloading crates.”
“I’m sure I’ll be assisting with the powered winch as well.
The cargo is a special alloy and must be handled with great care.
We’re using it within the Mission, not on the main line.
They mine the metal in the far north, and it takes months to ship it to the coast, let alone get it here by train.
” Pride warmed my voice. Progress could only happen through the efforts of many regions working together, through the House of Industry’s tremendous investment in the materials needed to bring radiance to every corner of our nation.
Scratching his jaw, Ezra frowned as he walked. “I see.”
“Are you listening?” I asked, a little perturbed that he didn’t seem impressed by the quality and origin of our alloys.
“Yes. Yes, of course. Follow me.” He cut off the path onto a trail so narrow, I struggled to see how he could tell where to place his feet or where we were going.
Anxiety bubbled beneath my ribs. “I don’t like this. I don’t know where we are.”
“I do,” he said easily.
The hair on my arms stood up as I realized the brush around us moved gently out of the way.
Nothing tugged at my legs or scratched me.
“It’s only … I’m accustomed to being able to navigate on my own, within reason.
There are no landmarks here.” I looked over my shoulder. “I can’t even see the river now.”
He stopped abruptly and turned, sobering. “Are you afraid?”
“Of you?”
Ezra frowned. “No. Of the forest.”
“I’m afraid of the forest due to my own incompetence when it comes to surviving in the wilderness.” I gestured at the thick growth around us. “I wouldn’t know what to eat or how to find water.”